A Never Posted Post

[deebra]

Would any of you like to share your feelings with other CD's here???? We learn from each other. Your feelings on the below subjects.

1/ What are your inner feelings when the pink fog starts you to thinking about wanting to cross dress (take off your male clothes and dress in girl clothes) ?

2/ How do you feel when/while getting dressed in girl clothes (shaving legs, pubic area/ picking out panties and slipping them on, same with a bra and breast forms, hose, tight jeans or skirt, and the rest.

3/ What does the full length mirror do for you ?

4/ How does it feel to walk out the front door, drive and walk through the mall and girl shop ?

5/ To come home, undress and evaluate the last four or five hours ?

6/ Have you accepted, are you at peace being a crossdresser or ashamed and want to quit but can't?

Let's see if any want to share, I'm sure many are interested; if several share I will too, and in detail.

Deebra, just came home full dressed.

[Anne E]

Hi Deebra,

I'll give this a shot.

1. I feel happy. Stress drops away. I really look forward to this, because it's the most personal me-time I have.
2. I feel my blood pressure go down. I experience the world around me in greater detail. I see myself. I am able to do things that earlier seemed too heavy to lift.
3. I've never thought of buying one, but now I have. Thank you :-)
4. I haven't been out the door yet, but I'm planning it and I am so much looking forward to it. Ever since joining this site, I've realized that the trip out the door can be a good thing.
5. I'm so happy I have been there. The clothes come off, but the feeling doesn't go away. I tend to leave something on for as long as I can (ever since my last time cross dressing, I've kept my toenails bright red). It feels like a good time for a book and a bath.
6. I am at peace. It is no longer something that I am afraid of or confused by or that I try to quit. It's just me, looking at myself honestly, finding who I really am.

Peace.

Anne

[TheHiddenMe]

I generally ONLY dress these days when I have an opportunity to go out. Sometimes my wife knows I'm going out (e.g, a monthly meeting of our local TG group), while other times I am effectively "sneaking out" when she's out of the house.

1. Dressing up is on my mind most days. I am generally plotting my next opportunity to dress and go out. My wife writes her appointments on our calendar, so I know when she will be out for an extended period, so Dee can do the same, if I don't have any conflicts. For example, my wife has a bridge tournament next Friday, so I may have an opportunity to sneak out. Then on Saturday, we have our monthly TG meeting, but I will tell my wife--but she might have bridge again so I will go out in the afternoon also.

So my version of the pink fog is figuring out when I can get my fix again, figuring out what I'm going to wear and do.

2. When I'm getting dressed I'm usually trying to get it done quickly and not leave any traces, because I have a limited time to be out. Thus I'm trying to get the girly look as quickly as I can, and then making sure I cover my tracks (no makeup, clothes, shoes, or other girl stuff left out).

3. I love full length mirrors, especially when I'm out. It reaffirms to me I'm actually out dressed. I also love trying on clothes, so what better than a full length mirror to see how you look in that fabulous Ted Baker dress????

4. As noted in 1, I am always looking to go out dressed. When I am out, I'm actually a bit nervous. What if people I know see me (that has happened twice)? Do people know I'm a guy? Should I make eye contact with others?

I'm still working on gaining confidence, but I've never had a bad experience.

5. Generally I am rushing to get home to beat my wife home, or finding a place to change into drab, and making sure I have cleaned up all the makeup (eye liner, mascara, and lipstick), because my wife THINKS I've been bike riding (or whatever my cover story).

6. When I was a teenager I figured out for whatever reason I was a CD and there were others like me, so I was never ashamed. It took me until a couple of years ago to get over the fear of going out dressed. Once I realized there were no torches and pitchforks to greet me--actually I have made friends as Dee, which I never expected--I realized I could actually do what I have wanted to do for the last 50 years--go out dressed.

[Rhandi Spencer]

Here are my ramblings
1) I can get very frustrated when the fog rolls in. I do not have a place that I can dress when I want, However when the chance happens I am very happy about dressing as a female.
2) I love getting ready. it is a challenge to look femme but happy when I accomplish the goal
3)I have never looked in a full length mirror except one time at a store and I was very nervous
4) Never done it
5) I am always happy to have been able to dress always sad becasue it did not last longer
6) Not only have I accepted it I have accepted what comes with it, happines and even the comments that can be negative

good questions

[NancySue]

Hi Deebra, welcome.
1. When pink fog rolls in, often, inner and outer feelings rule...I simply dress.
2. Wonderful, relaxed, fantastic
3. Makes me smile...well done
4. Very nice. Thrilling
5. I stay dressed as long as possible. I’m not sure I evaluate my outings but more reflective of experiences. Thank goodness for no flat tire, police, accident.
6. I’ve totally accepted as has my wonderful wife, my dressing and am at peace.
Rainy day today...sitting here totally dressed, sipping coffee, life is good.

[Rayleen]

1- pink fog switches on my female mind and need to get dressed, feeling pretty.

2-feel the femme inside my body and femme gestures comes on.

3- wish it could be permanent and be able to live this way.

4- just in the yard cause an euphoric reaction of pleasure, never went out really in public.

5- no comment

6- never had any bad feelings, find it normal

[Stephanie47]

1. Pink Fog? It's been more than a decade where my inner self has driven me nuts and the necessity to relieve the stress has me climbing the walls. Wearing women's clothing has been a stress reliever. Retirement has decreased my stress levels. When I do have the opportunity to dress it seems it's just to mellow out for the day.
2. Usually when I know I have "Stephanie time" coming up I have a mental image of what I will be wearing for the day. Frankly, I'm to the point getting attired really is nothing more than when I pull on my male clothes. If I was not married I'd probably have two racks in the closet. One for Stephanie and one for her brother. Grab whatever works for the mental image of the day.
3. Full length mirrors are great because a full length mirror requires standing far enough away from it which makes that male looking face not so dominant. Hate close up mirrors. Yuck!
4. I do not mingle with the masses. I do like a drive and evening stroll.
5. It's a mixed bag when it comes to dedressing (new word). I usually wish I did not have to undress and revert to male clothes. I love it when my wife is away on a trip. Then I am able to don something more of a lounging nature such as an floor length nightgown. Or lay around in bra, panty and slip.
6. I came to accept myself several decades ago. In the beginning the entire cross dressing idea was a point of shame. There was no information out there for a teenage boy in the 1960's to understand anything about cross dressing. Cross dressing in the 1960's meant you were suppose to be a homosexual. Very confusing.

Thank the goddesses for this site.

[Beverley Sims]

These answers are my feelings of twenty years ago.......

1. My urge to dress overwhelms all else.

2. Elation and excitement.

3. Very little really, probably destroys the image I have of myself.

4. A little apprehensive but it is something I have to do .... I am a woman.

5. Difficult to change back, very little evaluation of the time spent, I am getting on with life.

6. Accepted it since I was sixteen when all shame and guilt gave way to being what I wanted to be.

A am always dressed, I don't go naked in the world for anyone.

I would probably be locked up if I did. :-)

[Roxanne Lanyon]

My Pink Fog makes me happy!
I adore being a girl
I love to be in dresses
and I always think about making a man happy.
Roxanne's Pink Fog is becoming her life!

[Teresa]

Deebra,
I don't get pink fog that often now . All the events you describe are very much everyday , I go out as a woman so I have to get the basics right so when I step out the door I feel comfortable . Shopping is done on a need basis , basically as the seasons change just like most women would do . Coming home usually means putting the supermarket shopping away and deciding on an evening meal , I undress at bedtime and slip on a nightie . The worse bit is makeup removal and popping the wig back on it's stand . Why would I want to quit this is my life now I enjoy living it as Teresa , I have not only accepted it myself but everyone around me now accepts me in fact most people only know me as Teresa , it's a wonderful feeling .

[Phoebe Reece]

1 - I simply start mentally planning for my next time out in the world as Phoebe.
2 - I just feel normal most of the time. Sometimes a little rushed as I often have plans to meet someone at a particular time.
3 - The mirror tells me if I got it right or if I need to choose something different to wear. Trying to match skirt, top, shoes, and accessories sometimes takes a while to be satisfied with the look.
4 - It feels great to walk out the door and do whatever is planned for the day - be it shopping, eating in a restaurant, attending a play, or doing anything else. I have no problem at all interacting with others while out and have no worries about whether I "pass" or not. I am being me, and almost everyone treats me as the lady that I try to present. I have never had a negative experience while out and about.
5 - Most of the time, when I dress, it is for the entire day - not just a few hours. When I finally get undressed and hit the shower - I'm tired, my makeup is worse for wear, my face is in need of another shave, my wig is in need of brushing, and on a hot day some of my clothing is a bit sweaty. Sure, there is a little regret at undoing my femme appearance, but I am mostly ready to get out of it all and get cleaned up by that time.
6 - I have long since accepted and embraced my crossdressing. I am proud that it is a part of who I am. I will never give it up, unless it stops being a fun activity. Even then, I kind of doubt I would actually give it up.

[t-girlxsophie]

Teresa,do you still have any sense of excitement at all regarding your dressing,just asking as i got a wee bit testy with one of my dear friends,who doesn't get as much chance to dress as me,when I said to her I dont see the point in padding when I'm at home,she said she thought because I dress most days Its become a habit .I assured her that I still get an awesome feeling when I step out the door dressed,or meet friends for a night out,or even putting a lovely outfit on

Sophie

[Teresa]

Sophie,
I'm not so much excited as really enjoying what the lifestyle is giving me . Marcelle ( Isha ) called it social transition it just feels so good to go out as Teresa and integrate into society , it's part of my life so I've reached a balance . I recall Reine saying you will eventually feel comfortable when you achieve a balance , when the pendulum stops swinging . At the time I was still with my wife and the pendulum swings were out of her comfort zone, it's a sad fact that we've had to separate to find my balance .

OK new outfits are exciting , girls like a WOW ! sometimes and I'm no different .

[deebra]

Now my turn. I have learned from this post that a number of us dress morning to night and are at peace and acceptance they are a CD or transgendered and they go out dressed and present as a woman whether they pass or not. Also the emotional satisfaction and contentment wearing the clothes and presenting and living as the woman that is born within us. Isn't this forum great, only we understand each other, learn and rely on each other. No one else understands why we enjoy wearing panties and a bra but we do. Thanks for all the input. Now let me tell you why I enjoy being a CD.

1/ When the pink fog enters my mind and I start thinking about dressing in girl clothes like Ressie said I also get a bit sexually aroused, anxiety starts to take over along with excitement and I need to go get dressed.

2/ Happy, when I open my panty, thong and bra drawers and see all those beautiful and feminine undies that women wear I get a rush, feminine rush that I am becoming in a sense female like them. I love how the lingerie feels once on and how I have taken on the womanly look as I glance in the mirror. One thing I really enjoy is when I pull on tight soft feminine jeans over a tight tuck in panties I love the feeling of zipping up the short zipper and how it snugs the flat front. Shaving is just the first step in what is to come. Each piece of clothing I put on just adds to how nice it is to leave being a man and the enjoyment and feminity of being a girl.

3/ I love a woman's curves, looking in the mirror I now have them.

4/ LIberated and equal that I can dress in women's clothes, the clothes of my choice and go about in public feeling female which makes me wearing women's clothes feel perfectly right and normal. Passing attractive women in the mall is a pleasant thought to know we are both wearing the same female underwear and outerwear, definitely a female to female connection.

5/ Satisfaction.

6/ Have accepted crossdressing and wanting the same things women/girls/females do was born within me, I had no say. It gives me more pleasure than a non Cd has but has some problems too, slipping on a pair of panties makes it worth it.

[sometimes_miss]

1/ What are your inner feelings when the pink fog starts you to thinking about wanting to cross dress (take off your male clothes and dress in girl clothes) ?
I feel normal. I don't need the onset of the pink fog. I always feel that I should be wearing girl clothing, no trigger needed.
2/ How do you feel when/while getting dressed in girl clothes (shaving legs, pubic area/ picking out panties and slipping them on, same with a bra and breast forms, hose, tight jeans or skirt, and the rest.
I feel normal, because it's what I feel like I'm supposed to be wearing.
3/ What does the full length mirror do for you ?
I don't look in mirrors when dressed as a female, because I cannot look even remotely like what I feel like I'm supposed to look like. I would not be any happier being an ugly, homely old woman than I am being an ugly, homely old man. At least as a man, dressing, appearing and behaving as a financially successful person will continue to make me attractive to those that i want to date, even if I am not a 'pretty' boy.
4/ How does it feel to walk out the front door, drive and walk through the mall and girl shop ?
n/a, I don't go out dressed.
5/ To come home, undress and evaluate the last four or five hours ?
I don't evaluate my dressing up as a female. I do it because it eliminates the always there feeling that I'm in the wrong clothes when I'm dressed as a male.
6/ Have you accepted, are you at peace being a crossdresser or ashamed and want to quit but can't?
I'm okay with it, but would want to quit because crossdressing severely limits the number of women I could consider for a long term relationship.

[Roxanne Lanyon]

I adore it when the Pink Fog rolls in, and engulfs me! I love the sensation of girlie smooth legs, nylon encompassing my waist, stockings caressing my thighs. I melt under the glances of a cute boi, dreaming of kissing my lips. I enjoy the silky thoughts of wrapping my arms around his neck, promising a beautiful relationship and love, to him!

"Being Roxanne, Melts My Soul, . . . ."

[Charlotte7]

Would any of you like to share your feelings with other CD's here????

Oh, yes, that'd be good

We learn from each other. Your feelings on the below subjects.

I'll share them with you, I'll share them with you all

1/ What are your inner feelings when the pink fog starts you to thinking about wanting to cross dress (take off your male clothes and dress in girl clothes) ?

Oh, what a moment that is- the Pink Fog. It comes out from nowhere, first it grips at my toes, they start to tingle, then my ankles, calves, knees, my thighs are next, then (we'll skip that bit), the small of my back, my solar plexus, my heart races, my breath shortens, the tingling it moves to my, we'll skip that bit too, my neck, my chin, my lips, the tip of my nose, my ears, my eyes, they start to dart about, oh, the feeling of pink fog as it sweeps across me, so lucious, so irresitable.

2/ How do you feel when/while getting dressed in girl clothes (shaving legs, pubic area/ picking out panties and slipping them on, same with a bra and breast forms, hose, tight jeans or skirt, and the rest.

As I start to get dressed, I'm all a-tremble, no matter how many times I have done it, no matter how often I have done it, the feeling is always the same, an-tici-pation!! Anticipation, but also fear, fear of discovery? Self doubt too, What if this time I don't get the same hit? What if this time...? But it hasn't happened before so why should I worry, but, worry I do. And then there is the choice of clothes. Do I want to dress up? Do I want to dress down? How long have I got? Somethng silky? Something shiny? Something lacy? Something tight? Something loose? Something flowing? Something formal? Something t...y? Something, a bit usual? I open my drawers, I open my wardrobe, I get things out, I hold them up, I put them back, I get something else out, I hold it up, I put it back and then, there's always a then, that moment, I knew it was comming, that moment when I see it! The outfit that I'm going to wear. A new determination, the decision has been made, I cannot wait, I must complete the transformation, I must once again give wings to Charlotte, I must let her be free, free to fly and to float about, Charlotte, in the world once again.

3/ What does the full length mirror do for you ?

The full lenght mirror!! How could Charlotte possibly be in the wolrd without the full length mirror? I'm a short, fat, middle aged man, transformed, transformed into Charlotte once again, Charlotte in all her beauty, the shoes, the tights, the hem of the skirt, the flat front, the top, the face, the fully made up face, red lips, long lashes, the eyes, dark and sensual, the hair, not a strand out of place, the necklace, sparkling in the light. All reflected back to me in the full length mirror.

4/ How does it feel to walk out the front door, drive and walk through the mall and girl shop ?

The fear! Oh yes the fear, the fear of discovery, the fear of ridicule, the fear of wardrobe malfunction, the fear of collapsing on the street and being carted to the Emergency Room, the fear of being caught up in a random chance happening, the fear of needing to go to the toilet, the fear of ...? Yes, the fear, but then, peace, as the fear is replaced with deep inner contentment, of freedom, of liberation, of Charlotte flying high on gossamer wings, of taking to the air and simply being Charlotte, of entering the shop, of browsing the rails, of finding the one thing, that makes Charlotte's heart skip a beat, of taking it to the changing rooms, of being surrounded by mirrors, of trying it on, of seeing Charlotte, looking even more beautiful than before, of taking it over to the cash desk, of paying for it, a meeting of eyes, she, the SA, she knows the secret of Charlotte, she knows who this is for, but as the beep of the scanner and the money is passed over, the smile, the knowing smile, that holds Charlotte for a moment and then releases her back into the mundane world of the shop, the picking up of the bag, the weight of the clothes in the bag, the an-tici-pation of arriving home and putting it on properly for the first time.

5/ To come home, undress and evaluate the last four or five hours ?

The journey home, bittersweet. The arrival home, bittersweet. The growing realisation that all of this is about to come to an end, that, for today, Charlotte's time is limited, that, for today Charlotte is dying and soon will be no more, no more that is, until the next time, a smile at the realisation that there will be a next time

6/ Have you accepted, are you at peace being a crossdresser or ashamed and want to quit but can't?

I have accepted, I am Charlotte, Charlotte is me, we are one and the same, she, Charlotte exists in me and I in her, we are one and the same. I cannot feel shame, this is me, this has always been me, this will always be me, I know no different life, I seek no different life, we are two and we are one, entwined to the very core of our being. There has been no shame, there is no shame, there will be no shame, Charlotte is a gift given to me and I must do everything in my power to keep her happy, she is my responsibility, because if I don't Charlotte cannot be.

[Fran in skirts]

OK! You asked for it!

1/ What are your inner feelings when the pink fog starts you to thinking about wanting to cross dress (take off your male clothes and dress in girl clothes) ?

I only dress in "Girls Clothes" I do not wear mens clothes anymore.

2/ How do you feel when/while getting dressed in girl clothes (shaving legs, pubic area/ picking out panties and slipping them on, same with a bra and breast forms, hose, tight jeans or skirt, and the rest.

Normal!! I don't wear wigs, bras, or tight jeans

3/ What does the full length mirror do for you ?

Helps get the skirt straight.

4/ How does it feel to walk out the front door, drive and walk through the mall and girl shop ?

Again it is a normal feeling for me.

[QUOTE]5/ To come home, undress and evaluate the last four or five hours ?[/QUOTE]

I never worry about evaluating my trips to town. The only thing I do is take off my shoes.

6/ Have you accepted, are you at peace being a "crossdresser" or ashamed and want to quit but can't?

I am who I am and don't worry about it. I live for my self and do not care what strangers have to say about the way I dress. I am not ashamed at all.

So there you have it in a nut shell.

Fran

[DaisyLawrence]

What Fran said (except I do wear tight jeans and bras some times, even a wig in the past but not so much these days)

[CynthiaD]

Sure, why not?

1. I'm in a state of pink fog most of the time, and I dress every day. On those days when I need to dress in male mode for a while, it's a tremendous relief. When I change to female mode, my thoughts are usually that it's time to get rid of the weird stuff and get back to normal.

2. I love picking out my outfit for the day. First I decide whether it's a dress day or a skirt and top day. I lay everything out ahead of time to coordinate the colors. Then, if it's a makeup day, I put on my makeup, which I can do quickly even though I find it to be something of a chore. Then I put on everything I laid out and top it off with a wig. The last step is putting on lipstick and dangly earrings. I have no special feelings while getting dressed, because "it's just my clothes." But when I get done and see a woman looking back at me from the mirror, I feel a sense of great satisfaction, and think, "Yes, that's me."

3. I always check out my appearance in a full length mirror. It really increases my satisfaction and self confidence to see the full effect of my outfit.

4. It feels wonderful to get out the door, especially once I've been out for a while. I want others to see me as a woman, and I love the opportunity to show off my female self.

5. I don't come home and undress. I come home and stay dressed. It's just my clothes, after all. I do assess my outings, usually with the feeling that I can go anywhere and do anything as a woman. And that feels like heaven.

6. I've accepted myself as a crossdresser. I love everything about it. I'm proud of it. I could stop, I'm certain of it. But I would never consider stopping, even for an instant. The only way I would ever stop is to go through a complete physical transition and live full time as a woman. I'm not in a position to go 24/7 yet, but as soon as the opportunity presents itself, that's exactly what I'm going to do.

[Tracii G]

This was for CDers correct?

[Beverley Sims]

This was for CDers correct?

A very astute comment. :-)

I wonder how many others missed it?

[Roxanne Lanyon]

I dream of being wrapped up in the Pink Fog, dressed, all sweet and feminine, with dreams of pretty things surrounding my heart. I adore being a Girl!
Roxanne Lanyon

[Ressie]

1/ What are your inner feelings when the pink fog starts you to thinking about wanting to cross dress (take off your male clothes and dress in girl clothes) ?
I get a bit sexually aroused with some anxiety.
2/ How do you feel when/while getting dressed in girl clothes (shaving legs, pubic area/ picking out panties and slipping them on, same with a bra and breast forms, hose, tight jeans or skirt, and the rest.
I get a bit sexually aroused with some anxiety.
3/ What does the full length mirror do for you ?
I get more sexually aroused, anxiety begins to dissipate.
4/ How does it feel to walk out the front door, drive and walk through the mall and girl shop ?
I shop in DRAB and I've pretty much become used to it.
5/ To come home, undress and evaluate the last four or five hours ?
Nothing to evaluate. I open bags and see what I got!
6/ Have you accepted, are you at peace being a crossdresser or ashamed and want to quit but can't?
Somewhere in between. The former sometimes, the latter at other times.

[beckypanties]

Not ashamed and no desire to change. This is who I am. After decades of running away from myself, I got tired of running and learned to accept myself.