I am not gay. I am not straight. I am Siegfried.

[Felicia M]

I have been wanting to respond to so many threads on here as of late but every time I set out to do so I find myself unable to articulate what has been on my mind lately. It started with these two threads:

"Lets dress while it still means something" by @phili
and also
"The stress of living two lives and the genderless trend" by @sarah_hillcrest

Both threads touched on the erosion of gender. I have expressed before that I believe it is slowly eroding away and becoming much more fluid. I feel it will only continue to accelerate but I didn't want to respond as I couldn't really articulate what I think and feel on a much deeper level.
Then I was struck by another couple of other threads:
"Having urges to be sexual with men" by @JENQUEENS51
and also
"Crossdressing and being gay" by @Maria 60

Both threads delved into our sexual nature. There seems to be this nagging obsession with perception and who we are sexually and what people believe we are sexually. There also seems to be a nagging obsession to label who we are and what we are which I completely understand given the struggle to deal with narratives in the world. As I was reading through the Urges thread I read this from @Charlotte7

And, you know what, this is 2018, let's just call it sex and do away with the labels. As long as you keep yourself and the person you're having sex with safe, as long as both parties are fully consenting adults, then nothing else matters.

I thought it was such a brilliant statement at the time and then I stumbled upon this today as I was reading Epsilon Theory which expanded on the idea.

Penn: There was this sentence said to me — at the time I heard it, I ridiculed it and now it seems like the most profound thing ever said. You know Siegfried & Roy?

Marchese: Of course.

Penn: I was having lunch with Siegfried and he was telling this story about dating a woman. I guess he saw a quizzical look on my face and he said in his German accent with his coiffed hair, “I am not gay. I am not straight. I am Siegfried.” I think that’s the only real truth I’ve ever heard. I don’t want to be atheist, libertarian, gay, straight. I don’t even want to be a man anymore. The only team I want us to be talking about is all 7 billion of us human beings.
― Penn Jillette, interview by David Marchese for Vulture (August 14, 2018)

link to the entire piece Clear Eyes, Full Hearts, Can't Lose:
https://www.epsilontheory.com/clear-...rts-cant-lose/

I read the above (and the rest of the entirety of the Epsilon piece) and everything coalesced in my mind. We are all trying to live out our truth. Almost everyone's truth is slightly different from one another's but one thing is clear. We are human. We are a spectrum. A living breathing spectrum that perceives and feels and grows every single day. And we are evolving. We are changing. We are feeling things for the first or second or hundredth time. And you know what we perceive now may change in one or five or seven years because as our conscience unfolds our perceptions change and expand. Beliefs crumble and fall and are remade again.

It really spoke to me about gender and perception. How at this moment in time it may be more important to perceive ourselves as human and let go of the binary way we have perceived and lived for thousands of years.

In a way we are all Siegfried. We are all trying to find our way. I think this is something to try and remember as everyone struggles in their own way to find their truth.

[docrobbysherry]

It sounds as tho Siegfried has FOUND his "truth", Felicia. And, it sounds as if u haven't found yours. In my 75 years, I haven't found mine either. Because as u said, we, and the world r constantly changing.

Never in my time on the planet has "truth" be so hard to identify!

Maybe because there R no universal truths for any of us? Except death and taxes, of course!

[Tracii G]

To put its simply like I have always done. Be yourself don't worry what others do or what society says you have to do.
All you have to do is do what makes you happy and keep yourself in tune and harmony with Mother Earth and the people around you.

No need to get overly esoteric about things.

[Beverley Sims]

I am just me, just like a lot of others here.

[mbmeen12]

Once you let go and or have epiphany enjoy life to the fullest...The time and place is critical though.....

[Helen_Highwater]

Felicia,

Thoughtful writing. Like Traci I like to keep it simple so if we turn it around and change just being ourselves to accepting everyone else in being the person they are, then there's no need for anyone to feel alienated in society.

As long as a person does no harm to another I really don't care what they do in life.

[Teresa]

Felicia,
In very simple terms , " Live and let live !"

The experts are only as good as their source information , no two people will read that information in the same way . It's an area where everyone can have an opinion and no one is 100% right or wrong .

The bottom line is how much do you push society to be heard and how much do they really care , as long as your life doesn't affect others then you are relatively free to do as you please . Society today is so complex most of us live in our own little webs as long as we don't venture into other's then all will be well .

[Roxanne Lanyon]

It can all be confusing sometimes, but I try to remember, I am Roxanne. I will always be Roxanne. And she wants to be nothing but ever so happy!
"Love, in dresses, with sweet people. What else could there ever be?"
Roxanne

[DaisyLawrence]

I have been wanting to respond to so many threads on here as of late but every time I set out to do so I find myself unable to articulate what has been on my mind lately.

Well you've articulated it magnificently here

[Bobbi46]

We are who we are I do not need a specific label per se I know what I am. We just need to be ourselves expressing how we see the world and how we want to dress in that world and be comfortable doing so as well.
I believe in keeping things simple and quiet, live a smooth life trouble no one person and just live.

[susan54]

I am entirely comfortable with who I am. It is other people who insist on giving me labels, some of which I object to - for example I refuse to view myself as transgender just because I dress as a woman - it is a costume - it is not me.

[Mermaiden]

Felicia, thanks for giving me something to think about. I’ll throw in that our truth changes with time. Just as a fisherman “never steps in the same river twice”, I’m slightly different every day.
And I hadn’t seen Epsilon Theory. It looks like a timely thought source, especially as the Market is getting nervous.

[Barbara Black]

I'm happy for anyone that has found their 'Siegfried'. The struggle is with the inequality and lack of acceptance of it by the majority of the world. We are becoming more self-aware, as are the non-Siegfrieds. It will be painful until we have all accepted thr truth.

[Felicia M]

Aw - thanks everyone for the wonderful responses. I posted this last night right before turning in and was unsure what the response would be when I woke up this morning. I haven't had a good moment all day until now to say thank you.

[Stacy Darling]

Siegfried / Amitoufo

Stacy!

[Felicia M]

Stacy!

There is simply no occasion when it is not appropriate to say Amitoufo!

[sometimes_miss]

I've heard many times over the years, especially from females regarding females, that I should just always 'be myself'. But what if 'myself' isn't what anyone else wants? Do I just resolve myself to being alone for the rest of my life? The concept that there's someone for everyone, simply isn't true; there are millions of crossdressers, and there are certainly not millions of women who find crossdressers sexy.

It's easy for a celebrity who's rich to preach to the rest of us that he's just being himself and that's all that matters. It's not so easy when you're the poor guy with a low paying job, no social skills, no woman, and no prospects. Should that guy just 'be himself', too?Most would say, no, he should work to improve himself. But then he will become different from who 'himself' was. So he wasn't going to be himself as he was, anymore. He was becoming someone else.

It's easy to be yourself, when yourself is well off, successful, and liked by lots of people. So I don't take much stock in what celebrities say, because it has nothing to do with my own life and situation. I try to work to change myself for the better, and have done so over the years. I'm no longer the 'myself' of 1980.

[Danielle_cder]

Great insight! Great read! Thank you