Issues in my head

[Danielle t]

Me the wife and friend decided to go to the bar for Halloween and dress up The wife allows me to wear feminine clothes So I decided to wear a female devil costume I dressed up from head to toe makeup, wig, nails, corset top, tutu skirts, stockings, heels hoping that would help me due to the fact that I had not able to dress up fully in two years hoping that it would help my dysphoria and I sit here today still Fighting myself like I did before I dressed up The only thing I didn’t like about my costume was is how my makeup came out and that due to the fact of not doing it so long and the wife is not good at it But as they say practice makes perfect and friends do not know this about me any thoughts feel free.

[Tracii G]

None of us ever get our make up perfect if that helps.
Try using less make up next time.
If your friends don't know and they are going to be at the party what do you think will happen?
Do you want them to know or are you hesitant about them knowing?
Will it alter your friendship ? Maybe maybe not but none of us here know your situation and can't make the decision for you.

[Beverley Sims]

A bad makeup job probably enhanced the effect of your costume.

Don't worry, you can get it better next time.

The devil costume probably looks cute on you anyway.

Happy Halloween. :-)

[Bobbi46]

Its one of the difficulties we all go through including myself I am still finding my way through the maze of things that can be bought.

[Rachelakld]

Key word that I'm choosing in your post "Dysphoria"
I've 2 friends with Dysphoria.
Last year he/she had serious depression, this year she is on hormones and is happy to be female.
Other friend, she is stuck being a he (for wife & child) and struggles daily, and will do so until her body looks like what she feels like.

Make up secret - less is best (light application of foundation, mascara and lipstick, for evening wear add eyeshadow).

[Helen_Highwater]

Danielle,

Clarify somethjng for me please. Your SO allows you to wear femme things so how often and to what extent?

Makeup is an art that takes time to master. YouTube has many many good tutorials that will at least give you guidance, and at the risk of sounding like a stuck record, if you're able/prepared to visit a store makeup counter and ask for guidance on foundation, the SA's will give it regardless of how you're dressed.


I learned so much in the time I was sat in the chair. Cost me a few pennies in foundation etc but worth it for the improvements it brought me.

[Amy R Lynn]

If you have makeup (You should have your own), there is nothing wrong with taking some personal time to put some on and then remove it. You really don't even have to leave the bathroom with it on, if you don't want to. The only way you get better with makeup is by using it. Practice truly does make perfect.

Also, The advice about visiting a makeup counter is great. The makeup artist at the pro counter knows lots of tips and tricks! After all it is their profession. I have never had an issue with finding help. In fact the only one flinching or blinking an eye is me. We are our own worst enemy most of the time.

In my own personal experience, I have found that just taking an hour and dressing up, really helps. Or taking some time to practice my makeup skills and then washing it off. I guess my point is, there is nothing wrong with taking a little bit of time to be who you want to be.

PS: I am a single parent of two teenage boys, whom I have full custody of. I understand not being able to be dressed all the time. Its a balancing act if there ever was one.

[Stacy Darling]

Dressing with a "corset tutu devil costume" even seems weird to me! Yet I'm on a Surf Coast!

Issues? Fix your makeup skills daily, less is more!

[Danielle t]

She allows me to where pants leggings etc. dresses not too much make up and heels are not allowed due to we have Young kids Make up I’ve watched YouTube videos I just don’t get enough time to my self to work with it

[Danielle t]

Thank you for your kind words and wisdom and yes it is a balancing act keeping wife happy and kids happy

[Darling Micki]

1) Sounds like a super cute costume. Would love to see a picture of the final production.

2) Inside our minds reside all the unquiet voices of self doubt. As we carry them everywhere with us. There is no where we can go to get away from them. We must appease them as best we can to reduce their volume into silence.

I'm sorry for the prohibitive agreement you have entered into, but I understand the other rewards involved outweigh the negative impact.

I hope you can have some more dress up time, without restrictions.

I spend a lot of time alone. Alone with just my thoughts. People at work will randomly make a comment about losing their mind. I usually encourage them to do so. Tell them I lost mine years ago, best thing to ever happen to me.

I envy you your relationship.

[Shawna]

As was mentioned, a trip to the makeup counter at a nice department store is a lot of fun, and I almost always learn something different. On my last outing to Dillards, the cute young lady was so excited to provide a makeover, it was more fun just watching and listening to her! She mentioned that one of her friends had recently made the decision to fully transition and had taken her to the courthouse to process her name change...she also told me that she was happy to be part of my journey as well...

The point is we should look for ways to have fun with who we are - and if we learn something in the process that makes us even more LOVE who we are...then win-win!