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Thread: Crossdressing: Choice or Necessity? or "Could You Quit It And Not Miss It?"

  1. #26
    Member Ronnie38's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2017
    I have thought long and hard about this one. Aftet losing my father last month i have been reflecting on it even more. For as long as i can remember i have been drawn to girls clothes, shoes, makeup, jewlery, etc., etc. I grew up jealous of my older sister. I wanted my ears pierced, my nails done, makeup and pretty dresses. The special feeling of getting flowers. When middle and high school came i was jealous of the pretty girls. I wanted to be a girl so i could have boobs and wear pretty bras. I was attracted to girls physically on a sexual level, yet still drawn to their clothes and accessories. My favorite color has always secretly been pink. Fast forward to today, those feelings still have never left. My wife loves me enough to accept this about me and allows and encourages me to explore it. Its hard to explain in words but i kind of liken it to being the opposite of a tomboy. I have no desire to transition or become a woman but if it were to become a completely and socially acceptable thing, i would probably become the girliest man you would ever meet. Its not something i can say i was born with but not something i can just turn off either. It is just what i like and who i am. I find some things pretty and feel that as a human being i have the right to feel pretty too.

  2. #27
    BEING YOUnique is AWESOME Princess Chantal's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2008
    Winnipeg, MB, Canada
    It was a choice for me from day one. Could I quit if and when I want to, yes! Just like any other hobbies and interests that I had enough of.

  3. #28
    Platinum Member Beverley Sims's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2011
    Lowestoft UK. Beverley was here.
    No, it is too ingrained in me now.
    Work on your elegance,
    and beauty will follow.

  4. #29
    Aspiring Member GracieRose's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2017
    Quote Originally Posted by HollyGreene View Post
    I didn't choose to be a CD. It chose me, and it has a stronger will than I.
    Holly, What a great description.
    It has always been there. It may get stronger and weaker as other things take precedence. But it has NEVER gone away for the past 60 years, even when I thought that I was starting to win the battle.

  5. #30
    Member biancabellelover's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2017
    I’m just coming up to my two year anniversary of when I first crossdressed (I’m in my mid fifties).

    I don’t have mixed feelings about it at all; I love it!

    While I wouldn’t consider it a choice; neither is it a compulsion. I’m sure I could give it up if I had to, but I would miss it, as it has broadened my horizons and continues to do so. (Also see comment above: I love it!).


  6. #31
    mini kilted chick t-girlxsophie's Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2009
    Lanarkshire,Bonnie Scotland
    I've been through a lot both good and bad due to being a CD,to think about giving up. But sometimes I wonder how i'll feel in my dotage about it though

    We look to Scotland,for all our Ideas of Civilisation-Voltaire


    A woman who loves to wear beautiful clothes is like a flower.
    A man who loves to emulate these women is a special flower-a rose
    Facebook:Sophie Johnson

  7. #32
    Member Shayna's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2013
    Los Angeles (OK, I'm a Valley Girl)
    I managed to quit for over 10 years, but it eventually came back. I don't dress nearly as I often as I would like to, but I think about it all the time. Right now I don't care to quit so I don't even think it's a question, but I don't necessarily think it's Impossible, just improbable for most of us.

  8. #33
    Aspiring Member
    Join Date
    Oct 2017
    It's a simple no from me.

  9. #34
    Gold Member alwayshave's Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2011
    Washington, DC
    I'm a crossdress, always have, always will be.
    Please call me Jamie, I always_have crossdressed, I always will, "alwayshave".

  10. #35
    A Sweet Girl Roxanne Lanyon's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jun 2018
    North East Georgia
    Me too!
    As Sweet As I Can Ever Be

  11. #36
    Aspiring Member Georgina's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2005
    N. Ireland
    No I wouldn't want to stop. And miss the thrill of new outfits?

  12. #37
    Slip Into Something Femme Piora's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2009
    After my breakup, I purged every female item I owned. I moved to a new city and never even thought about crossdressing for 7 years. I was just making ends meet, barely, and that was the real reason that I put it out of my mind. After 7 years passed, I moved to another city, where I was financially better off. I started to think about dressing again, and bought a few lingerie items. My thoughts are that it can be suppressed, but it will never truly go away. These days, I happily indulge my pleasure of dressing in feminine clothing again. My desire came back like an express train. However, regardless of my circumstances, I will NEVER purge again. My crossdressing is here to stay.
    "Taking the time to be in touch with my feminine side"

  13. #38
    New Member
    Join Date
    Sep 2018
    No It's not a choice. I tried stoping many times. Nowdays I just accept it.

  14. #39
    Multi-Blogger Barbara Black's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2015
    Northeast Wisconsin
    By and large, there are some who could quit and get away from it. If nothing else, just out of pure stubbornness. No, even my stubbornness wasn't enough even after many years of marriage. But other than those few, who may not really had the primal urge, I would say that it sticks with you and will come out eventually.

  15. #40
    Senior Member GretchenM's Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2016
    Denver, Colorado
    No choice here. For 59 years I tried to get rid of the bitch in me that made me do these things. That is what often happens when you are a kid and you get caught and are punished for doing what felt natural. I finally gave up the fight and accepted her as a part of me. Now the masculine/male in me is merged with the feminine/female in me and the two are partners. As a professional in the sciences, I have researched the deep scientific foundations of what is known about this behavior and the consensus is that it is innate and not a choice. One can part from it for awhile, sometimes quite a while. But deep in your subconscious it remains alive. It is not known why this sometimes comes and goes. A lot of other things do that as well. So its variability in many is not unexpected. For some it is always there; for others it comes and goes. But it rarely ever departs permanently.

  16. #41
    Reality Check Krisi's Avatar
    Join Date
    Feb 2014
    Quote Originally Posted by Jackiefl View Post
    I suggest you look up past threads on this as it has been discussed many times
    Yes it has, but it hasn't been resolved. And there are probably new members since the last time this came up.

    I believe a person can stop anything if they really want to. Smoking, alcohol, drugs, beating his wife and crossdressing. Some are harder to stop than others. Drugs are physically addictive so you may need help. Alcohol as well but to a lesser extent.

    All these behaviors involve you voluntarily doing something. Buying and using alcohol, drugs, tobacco, etc. Crossdressing is the same. Nobody is holding a gun to your head and forcing you to put on a pair of panties and a bra, you are doing it because you want to.

    So the question is, could I quit? I recently went away for a few months and didn't crossdress. I was fine. I came home and began again. If I had to, I could quit. Like many others here, I don't have to, it's not hurting anybody, so I continue to dress as a woman when possible.

  17. #42
    Carole carhill2mn's Avatar
    Join Date
    Oct 2007
    Twin Cities, MN
    The simple answer to your question is "NO". Even if due to circumstances, I was unable to dress as a woman I would not be happy about it. I would think about it a lot and wish that I could do so again.
    Hugs, Carole

  18. #43
    Exploring NEPA now Cheryl T's Avatar
    Join Date
    Feb 2006
    Firstly I did not choose to be this way. Just as I did not choose to be right handed, Caucasian, or male.

    Could I quit cold turkey? Yes, I could but why would I? Why would I deny this part of myself? This is not a sexual thing, it's not a fetish, it's not a hobby, it's part of what makes me ME!
    Like many I went through multiple purges and periods of denial, but then I realized I'm happiest with this part of me intact. Thankfully my wife is fully supportive and I can express myself whenever I wish without judgement.

    It took decades for me to come to terms with who I am in this regard. I still don't know why, but from all I have garnered I feel it is genetic. I'm happy being me and I wouldn't change that for anything.
    Wear what makes you feel Confident !

  19. #44
    Senior Member Angela1954's Avatar
    Join Date
    Feb 2015
    No. I don't think I could. Like many others I have gone through the purges, denials, etc. And to this day I still struggle at times with guilt feelings. But I realize this is part of me; and I will not deny myself simply to conform to societal strictures.

  20. #45
    Silver Member Leslie Mary S's Avatar
    Join Date
    Feb 2009
    Madison AL
    For me I thought it was a choice and that I could quite anytime. WRONG. Now I find when I have time on my hands I am in fem attire. I am a hermit too.
    Leslie Mary Shy
    Remember this:
    The PINK FOG may seem, at times, to go away, but in fact it just ebbs and flows but does not go away._

  21. #46
    leggings junkie ellbee's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2016
    Let me fix your post for you...

    Quote Originally Posted by Krisi View Post
    Nobody is holding a gun to my head and forcing me to put on a pair of panties and a bra, I am doing it because I want to.

    Gee, you're right... Speaking for others *is* kinda fun!

  22. #47
    Join Date
    Aug 2016
    Southern Connecticut
    I could quit crossdressing just as easily as being 6 feet tall, white, and getting older each year. Patience, you are right about it being a compulsion.

    BTW - If I could quit anything, aging would be the thing, not crossdressing.

  23. #48
    Join Date
    Nov 2010
    Southeast USA
    I have vacillated on this topic many times over the years. When I was CD'ing in secret, I became very tired of having to hide everything and, so I would purge all of my feminine things and resolve to get on with life without CDing. Within a few months, though, I'd find myself back buying some panties and a bra and underdressing in secret.

    Once my wife caught me in lingerie and, after a few horrible months, came around to understanding my needs better, life has improved greatly. I just so love dressing and feeling feminine and, at 73, that's not likely to change at this point

  24. #49
    Emerging Diva Nikki A.'s Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2004
    ne pa
    You can't quit who you are. You may be able to control it, maybe abstain from "dressing" but deep inside it will always be there and will always find a way to make itself known.
    Even if I don't dress fully, I am always wearing something, even if it is just panties. I get up some mornings wanting to wear a skirt or dress to work, but I don't. I know if I start with a skirt, I'd end up fully dressed. There is a part of me that really does not care anymore, but I need my job and I can't afford to lose it (I'm in an at will state)and while I may have federal protection (at least for now), I don't have the time to fight a court case

  25. #50
    Silver Member IleneD's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2016
    Can't stop. Won't stop. No retreat.
    Besides..... stop WHAT? wearing clothes? they're MY clothes and I put them on to stay warm, not show my incredibly naked body, and to make a statement. But they're MY clothes, so why stop.
    I plan on going on like this until I can go no longer. Then it's a toss up. Be buried in my favorite dress or in my Navy Service Dress Blue.
    There resides within me a Woman, and she is powerful.
    She has been my Grace and Bearing on the stormiest seas.
    I could no more deny Her than I would my own soul.

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