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Thread: It takes time!

  1. #1
    Silver Member Pumped's Avatar
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    It takes time!

    It was maybe five years ago and my wife discovered a pair of my panties. We had "the talk", she pretty much flipped out and I figured the marriage was over. I purged about 90% of my collection, and hung onto a very few pieces I could hide easily. Next was her revelation that I was not going to stop and we moved into a very hush-hush DADT. The relationship has slowly transitioned so we enjoy dressing in lingerie and high heels together during some of our romantic times. Sometimes I underdress in thigh highs, garter belt and panties and she is well aware of it. I have a few pairs of women's pants, shorts, tops and a silly school girl outfit she has seen me in, and out of! ;-)

    A few nights back we went to a fancy dinner and I underdressed. After we had sat down to eat she put her hand on my leg and her eyes perked up when she felt the clasp on the garter and I got a big smile. We both feel a little naughty underdressed in groups of people that have no idea.

    The other night I was looking at dresses on the internet and she asked if I was going looking for her or me? I told her both! I asked her if I bought a dress if she would help me get dressed up? Sadly she said no, but not one word about the dress. I did order it, but haven't said anything to her yet, but will when the time is right. I want to make sure it fits and I like it, plus I mayhave need some accessories for it. She did mention that I probably would need a bra to fill it out but said she wasn't sure how she felt about that as bras have been off limits.

    Gurls, give it time, sometimes they come around.

  2. #2
    🙊🙈🙉 Patience's Avatar
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    Good for you.
    When haters hate, I celebrate!

  3. #3
    -1.#QNaN Lydianne's Avatar
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    A thread called "It Takes Time!" written by somebody called "Pumped" and responded to by somebody called "Patience"?!?? .

    I swear you couldn't script that! ..

    But whatever dressing is within both of your comfort levels is what should be done. Pleased to hear you're getting opportunities, and it's good that your wife also gets some enjoyment from your dressing. Credit to your wife for giving the marriage a chance, even though it's understandable why some might choose not to.

    - Lydianne.

  4. #4
    Silver Member Elizabeth G's Avatar
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    I absolutely understand where you're coming from. My wife found out about two years ago and I too feared it was over for us. Since that time we have been slowly working out way through things like you are. I'm not quite as far along as you are but my wife knows I underdress, has given me some panties and I can now do the MIAD thing in front of her.

    So yes, it does take time. Congrats to you and thanks for the encouragement.

  5. #5
    New Member Leah Love's Avatar
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    I count my lucky stars...I told my girlfriend about Leah when we started dating...fast forward a couple years and we are buying clothes off amazon together! We just bought a makeup organizer for all OUR makeup lol

    She actually got me a pair of thigh high boots at the beginning as a kind of acceptance offering. They’re awesome...and so is she!

  6. #6
    Silver Member Bobbi46's Avatar
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    It's good to have everything out in the open, secrets have a habit of being uncoverd at the worst of times and then all hell breaks loose and takes a lot of open talking to resolve, I am glad that you are talking things through, dont push the bounderies and take it at her speed, it will all work out in the end, have patience and think of your good lady first.
    I started life a lost man now I am a found woman

  7. #7
    Member Lucy23's Avatar
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    I'm glad it is working out for you. Best of luck!

  8. #8
    Silver Member Micki_Finn's Avatar
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    Don’t be too disappointed by her declining to “help you get dressed”. I’ve had a few CDs reach out to me asking me to “help them dress” and I always find it a weird request. If you want me to go shopping and help you pick stuff out, that’s great, but why do you need me to help you get dressed? Do you not know that the skirt goes on the bottom and the blouse on top? Do dresses confuse you? I don’t know what I could possibly do that would help you to get dressed.

  9. #9
    🙊🙈🙉 Patience's Avatar
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    You could zip up the back of a dress, Micki.

    Other than that, I got nothing.
    When haters hate, I celebrate!

  10. #10
    Re Member beckypanties's Avatar
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    Yes it takes time for our SOs to come to terms with our dressing, and realize that we are each still the same person that they knew before the revelation. Sadly, some of them don't stick around long enough to have that epiphany.

  11. #11
    Female Illusionist! docrobbysherry's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Micki_Finn View Post
    Don’t be too disappointed by her declining to “help you get dressed”. I’ve had a few CDs reach out to me asking me to “help them dress” and I always find it a weird request. If you want me to go shopping and help you pick stuff out, that’s great, but why do you need me to help you get dressed? Do you not know that the skirt goes on the bottom and the blouse on top? Do dresses confuse you? I don’t know what I could possibly do that would help you to get dressed.
    C'mon, Micki! U know this is one of CD's most popular fantasies!

    Some gay/bi ones want "help" from another dresser. Straight ones want "help" from a GG!
    I've had few T's that want to dress together refer to it as "play"!
    Last edited by docrobbysherry; 11-15-2018 at 12:31 AM.
    U can't keep doing the same things over and over and expect to enjoy life to the max. When u try new things, even if they r out of your comfort zone, u may experience new excitement and growth that u never expected.

    Challenge yourself and pursue your passions! When your life clock runs out, you'll have few or NO REGRETS!

  12. #12
    Platinum Member Beverley Sims's Avatar
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    You are right, give it time, let her take the lead and don't push the issue.
    Work on your elegance,
    and beauty will follow.

  13. #13
    Platinum Member alwayshave's Avatar
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    Pumped , I'm glad that your wife is coming around.
    Please call me Jamie, I always_have crossdressed, I always will, "alwayshave".

  14. #14
    Silver Member Pumped's Avatar
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    Micki, to me it just ment to help coordinate some accessories. Really I was hoping to get her involved. I realize it doesn't take much work to get dressed, but getting her help and cooperation would awesome.

    I understand it might be weird to help another CD get dressed, but this is my wife, not some random person!

    [SIZE=1]- - - Updated - - -[/SIZE]

    Quote Originally Posted by Patience View Post
    You could zip up the back of a dress, Micki.
    Or even more fun, unzip it later! ;-)

  15. #15
    Silver Member Pumped's Avatar
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    Last night my wife mentioned the dress I was looking at on line. I told her I had bought it and worn it already. She asked me how I felt when I put in on. I told her I enjoyed it, but when I looked in the mirror I was just some fat old guy in a dress so the end result is frustrating. I told her if I lost 50 pounds and loped of my head and switched it with someone else's it would be better!

    I have to give her credit, no condemnation, just curious questions and conversation.

    In my opinion there is nothing I can do to look good dressed. I have a barrel shaped rib cage so even if I lost a bunch of weight my upper body would still be "thick" from the side view. From the waist down I think I look good. My wife compliments me on my butt and legs. She comments that my legs have more definition that hers.

    I envy you gurls that are more petite, and more oval rib cage.

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