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Thread: Cross dressing and weight

  1. #1
    Member Read only MiniRock's Avatar
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    Cross dressing and weight

    One thing that's bothered me over the last couple of years is that I'm finding it ever harder to keep my weight down. Clearly I don't like it from a health point of view. Moreover it is not flattering even when dressed as a man. But worse than that somehow is that, if I can't keep my physique at least reasonably in trim, I know it's going to ruin and probably kill my desire to cross dress. Because my motivation is entirely to feel and look, within the bounds of reality, sexy. Fortunately, if I wear a bit of shapewear, it holds my stomach in well enough that my favourite pink frock still looks pretty slinky. But if and when it doesn't, that will be the end for me. The thought of a beer gut hanging over sexy lacy knickers just doesn't hit the spot!

    Clearly women suffer this issue too as they age any many seem to content themselves with wearing practical - feminine certainty - but by no means sexy clothing. And from some of the photos on this sight, it seems that some of you are happy to take the same route.

    Actually, this ties into the question of passing as well. Because, for example, I've been advised here to try lower heels and a wig in order to be able to go out in the daytime. The latter I might get round to, but the former has somewhat less appeal - although of course many women manage to look very sexy and elegant without looking like hookers. But not, imho, if they're fat.

    So my question to you possibly older ladies out there is, idoes weight gain affect your motivation to dress up? Or are you content to transition (in a different sense than that usually meant on this forum) towards age and figure appropriate clothing? Or perhaps, as is my suspicion, this is something that highlights the difference between those of us who are men in women's clothing and those of us who actually want to feel like women. Thoughts thereon also sought.

  2. #2
    Senior Member DanielleDubois's Avatar
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    I am 65 and have thought about your question in my posted thread " WYSIWYG or "How do you feel about Cleveland" "

  3. #3
    Platinum Member Beverley Sims's Avatar
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    I am 5' 7" and weigh 145lbs, a bit shapeless but in jeans and a top I present reasonably well.
    Work on your elegance,
    and beauty will follow.

  4. #4
    Senior Member Maid_Marion's Avatar
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    I keep in shape gardening and maintaining the yard. I've even figured out ways of stretching it out to all all year activity. My waist line is not only two inches less than it was a decade ago, but I now carry my weight in the right places, even though I weigh half a stone less (7 lbs). My doctor says that whatever I'm doing is fine, as long as I don't lose any more weight.

  5. #5
    Senior Member Angela Marie's Avatar
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    At 64 i'm between 5ft 6 and 7. Yeah we do shrink a bit as we get older. Fortunately I have exercised regularly for 40 years. Your weight is going to shift as you age; nothing you can do about that. Exercise should include aerobic and weight training, and a healthy diet is just as important.
    But remember; aside from looking good in clothes, the real benefit is to your health. In the end that is what really counts.

  6. #6
    A Sweet Girl Roxanne Lanyon's Avatar
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    Oh my, weight is the ting I worry about so much! Now that I have reached 70, (I could simply cry!), my weight will just not go down, no matter what I do. I have tried diets, exercise, whatever, but I still stay around a size 2X Plus! Oh girls, help me, please! I now have a little heart problems, atrial fibulation, and a slightly leaky heart valve, and I take a lot of pills, daily. I go to the gym three times a week, but I cannot get too vigorous because of getting winded. But I hardly eat anything (I would make a good, cheap date!) but cannot seem to lose a pound! I am at a lose! And I adore wearing pretty dresses, and things. Oh, girls, Roxanne sometimes feels like she is such a mess, and just wants to cry!
    Roxanne Lanyon
    As Sweet As I Can Ever Be

  7. #7
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    I am 300lbs and a size 24 to 28. The only thing that bothers me is that I cant always find what I like in my size and sometimes I don't like the way things look on me. This may because I have no hips and carry my weight in my middle. It is no different that finding large size shoe. On the up side I have lost 30+lbs since I told my wife.

    Sara

  8. #8
    Senior Member GretchenM's Avatar
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    At 73 I am a bit overweight and my doctor has told me to lose weight. So, I have tried. I ate less and exercised more for a few weeks. The scale remained on 205. So, I went back to my prior routine and after a couple of weeks the scale still read 205. Then came a holiday and I ate and drank more. Now the scale read 206. So I practically starved myself for 2 weeks and the scale read 204. I questioned the scale. I tested it by standing on the scale holding a heavy box. The weight difference was the weight of the box. Scale is honest and trustworthy. Conclusion? Some of us just have great difficulty losing weight. When it comes to our biology we are not created equal.

    Women who are 73 rarely ever do the sexy thing because their interest in sex pretty much died a few years earlier. Things change and so do we. My solution? There are some really pretty tunic tops. Far from sexy, but quite feminine. In short, adapt to the changes that will come as you age. There is more to life than being sexy looking as male or female. And you can still be attractive even though perhaps no longer sexy.

    But then perhaps you will have better luck at losing weight than I have. I'm still trying, but the scale still reads 205, no matter what I do. It's biology and as a biologist I can assure you that living organisms, as individuals, often do not follow the rules. It sometimes takes the road less traveled. After all, I am TG.

  9. #9
    Platinum Member alwayshave's Avatar
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    I am dieting so that my muffin top is less noticeable. Health concerns are an issue as well. I'm 6'2 240, size 18W.
    Please call me Jamie, I always_have crossdressed, I always will, "alwayshave".

  10. #10
    Senior Member Maid_Marion's Avatar
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    A scale really helps when cooking for one. When I measure out pancake mix the most accurate way to do that is by weight. It also ensures consistent portion sizes. Cooking is also a way to get some exercise.

  11. #11
    Silver Member Micki_Finn's Avatar
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    You seem to be under the impression that women are just “sexy” up until a certain point at which they become matrons. Women fight tooth and nail every day to live up to the beauty standard. Diet, exercise, skin care, hair care ,hair removal, shape wear, make up, plastic surgery etc etc.

    If you want to be “sexy” you have to make the commitment.

  12. #12
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    I'm six foot even these days which is down from six foot two decades ago...spinal collapse as part of the aging process. When I was six foot two I ranged from a ghastly looking 138 pounds to maybe 190 pounds. As the shrinkage in height occurred the weight did go up. When I was renewing my driver's license one year the clerk suggested I update my weight. Egads! That really hurt looking at 215 pounds IN PRINT! That motivated me to dump the beer and soda. Now at six foot even money it's 195-200 pounds. The measurements come in at 42-38-40, so I am a larger person than most males and 99.95% females. What's a cross dresser to do? I cannot fix the visual. I can plaster on all the makeup I want with a trowel. It will not change a thing.

    At my age (71) I still only wear dresses, no pants. That's my thing. I find there are plenty of dresses on the market that look terrific on women in their 40-60 age range who still work outside the home. Two inches above the knee and downward look fine on me. In my mind the days of wearing a mini dress are long gone. I'm never going to have a slim waist. I accentuate the bust line and wear dresses such as sheaths and empire waists which fit at the bust and not the waist. If I was five foot six my body proportions would be the same as most women in my age group.

    I don't feel like a man in women's clothing although I look like a man in women's clothing. I don't know what it feels to be a woman since I am not. The clothes just reflect how I feel for the day. Some days when I do have the entire day or more to do anything I want, there is no motivation to don a pretty dress. I just do not think in terms of male or female anymore.

  13. #13
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    Growing old is something different for us.
    Exercise and the right diet is a must for my lifestyle. Candy, fast food and soft drinks are banned in my house. I just think its worth a lot more to wear a nice dress then eating garbage.

  14. #14
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    Well being on the large size all my life I take it as an insult that you are basically saying that fat women can't be sexy.

    I have seen lots of BBW's that were very sexy dressed and undressed.

    Anyway I find a bit of fat helps a lot as it's soft and pliable, very easy to get a feminine figure when you have some fat to push around with shapeware.

    Here is an example of how fat helps me with Crossdressing

    https://m.imgur.com/a/MU2G1aZ

    EDIT: Fixed the link
    Last edited by Robertacd; 11-30-2018 at 09:41 AM.

  15. #15
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    Perhaps you have low testosterone that can cause your issue.
    Maybe you should get checked by your Dr and he can make a suggestions of what you can do.
    Personally being fat hasn't stopped me from dressing because for me its not about the clothes its about matching the inside to the outside.
    Having extra fat helps fill in wrinkles in the face so thats one positive aspect. Helps to make real looking cleavage too.
    Dressing the way you like is fine and we all have things about our bodies we don't like so welcome to the club.
    Being short and fat isn't my choice but its reality and I will have to deal with it.
    Last edited by Tracii G; 11-29-2018 at 12:12 PM.

  16. #16
    Senior Member Nikkilovesdresses's Avatar
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    Yes Mini, my weight is directly linked to my desire to dress. I'm about 5kg or 11lb over my norm and it's killed the desire stone dead...apart from underwear of course... nothing seems to affect that.

    I'm dreading Christmas... I know I'll put on more.

    Good luck and keep away from the strudel.
    I used to have a short attention spa

  17. #17
    Female Illusionist! docrobbysherry's Avatar
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    MiniRock, if I can't look sexy, what's the point?

    I'm 75 and when I got serious about Sherry's figure 10 years ago I quit my gym and made gradual diet changes. Even little things, like switching from beer to wine and eating smarter and liter at nite, make a huge difference. I lost 20 pounds and they stayed off! Almost all from my "spare tire". Which was terribly unfem!

    My health, flexibility, and attitude r great for my age. Because I feel the way I look!
    Anyone can do what I did if their quality of life is more important than just eating and drinking!

    What I see in my mirror makes it all worthwhile!

    P1290699 (912x1024).jpg
    U can't keep doing the same things over and over and expect to enjoy life to the max. When u try new things, even if they r out of your comfort zone, u may experience new excitement and growth that u never expected.

    Challenge yourself and pursue your passions! When your life clock runs out, you'll have few or NO REGRETS!

  18. #18
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    I'm 5 8 and 165 about a size 10, although for bottoms only I can go to a 6 depending if I wear hip pads or not (my Rago cinchers can provide enough curves without depending on the look I'm trying to do). I was about 20# heavier this summer and started a modest diet which has been good for about 4# per month. I've got about 10# left to go to my target of 155. "Frame size" along with height apparently determines what your ideal weight should be, and determining frame size is done by measuring your wrist and checking a chart. When I do it this way, I'm off-scale low for male, but right on the border for small and medium frame for female (funny side note, my mother always had to buy "women's watches" and "slim" clothes for me growing up because men's watches/clothes were impossibly large for me...if only she knew I'd have been happy with my sister's hand me downs ).

    If I stick to that chart, I should be 140-145 for women, but considering I'm not one and besides, there is no way I could ever get down that low now and not look terrible. So I settled on 155 which is where there is some overlap in what's considered ideal for both.

    Over the years, I've learned which brands seem to cater to "realistic women", and I've found those fit well. Right now I'm about a 10 from Ann Taylor & J.Crew, and if I finish my program, I might be able to do an 8, which would make me happy. I could easily wear 6s and mediums in my early 20s (when I was about 145#), so I'll take that as a win if I get there.

  19. #19
    Silver Member Devi SM's Avatar
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    I'm 5'8" 59 years old. The pursuing of a sexy girly shape was in my mind from the beginning and I lost from 220 to 165 lbs with keto.
    I still on keto is a life style way not just eat, but, sleep, exercise, etc. Now in 7 months on HRT I had had to double or fix my diet because before I start it I was in 156 and has been impossible to lose weight, more than that I gained some. Hormones make more difficult to lose weight and i gain some may be for fat redistribution ution. Gain on hips, tighs and of course breast.
    No all women have that hourglass shape. When getting older women get in menopause that is a unbalance on hormones and that make them gain weight but most of the time at waist level as men. Some try diets and exercise but it doesn't work for all. Hormones es are a powerful enemy of that lovely hourglass shape but I think, if not already give up, all women want that shape so if you want to be a woman or look like the shape is fundamental...
    HRT 042018; Full time 032019
    Orchiectomy 062020; gender& name legal changed 102020
    Electrolysis face begins 082019, in genitals for GCS 062021
    Breast augmentation surgery 012022
    GCS 072022; BBL 022023; GCS revision 04203;END TRANSITION

  20. #20
    I accept myself as is Gillian Gigs's Avatar
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    Too many of us suffer from the middle age 'spread' and have to fight to keep the weight off. A couple of things that have helped me are;

    1. I work hard at keeping sugar out of my diet. Sugar is every where and it is a constant battle to stay on top of it. Sugar is the problem, not fat, and the sugar industry has fooled us all into cutting out fat, and not sugar. Yes, we need to reduce our fat intake also.
    2. We all need to get off our fat butts and get walking. Walking is the best exercise to loose weight and it is not hard on the joints. Look for ways to walk, instead of driving. Look for ways to increase the amount of steps you take in a day. The biggest muscles in the body are found in the legs, so start using those legs. As a benefit to walking my legs look a lot better in hosiery now than they did 2 years ago. Not in a muscular way either, just firmer, and sleeker. It helps with the stomach also.
    3. The more exercise you do, the more energy you will have. This sounds like a contradiction, but it is proven that exercise increases your metabolism which has all kinds of benefits.
    4. And now for the bad news, beer and liquor don't help with keeping your weight under control. Too often some kind of junk food is added to the drinks, which doubles up on the problem of increased intake.

    Whether male, or female, if you want to cut a nice figure it takes discipline and work, but there are rewards and benefits. In my case I am into smaller sizes now and have more to choose from. Coming down two sizes in women clothing makes a big difference.
    I like myself, regardless of the packaging that I may come in! It's what is on the inside of the package that counts!

  21. #21
    AKA Lexi sometimes_miss's Avatar
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    Try the Atkins diet. Remove all carbs until you have reached your desired weight, then add a few grams a day until you see yourself gaining weight again. Then cut back a little to maintain where you want to be. The Atkins diet has all kinds of yummy satisfying things in it, like BACON.
    Some causes of crossdressing you've probably never even considered: My TG biography at:http://www.crossdressers.com/forums/...=1#post1490560
    There's an addendum at post # 82 on that thread, too. It's about a ten minute read.
    Why don't we understand our desire to dress, behave and feel like a girl? Because from childhood, boys are told that the worst possible thing we can be, is a sissy. This feeling is so ingrained into our psyche, that we will suppress any thoughts that connect us to being or wanting to be feminine, even to the point of creating separate personalities to assign those female feelings into.

  22. #22
    Silver Member Majella St Gerard's Avatar
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    I just lost about 40 lbs and love that I can confidently wear slinky and form fitting outfits, when I was heavier I still wore things I would categorize as sexy but they hid my girth. I also don't find fat attractive, if you're a big girl or guy, wear clothes that are flattering to your figure. Many here and GG's out in the wild do not dress appropriately for their size, 5'5" at 200 lbs in a bodycon dress is not sexy, unless that is what you're into, not me (there are exceptions).

  23. #23
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    I have been a large person my whole life. It never affected my desire to dress one way or another. I like big women, it is all good as far as I am concerned.

  24. #24
    Aspiring Member Tania75's Avatar
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    I weigh in at 72kg, which is around 160lb, and 5'10 in height, and worry if I get over 73kg. Today I had a day off work and went down to my local shopping center (yes, to buy a bra and briefs), but also observing the ladies, for style tips, of course, and it quickly became obvious that it is not your figure which makes you look great, it's your style and how you carry it which is more important. Ladies with a fuller figure don't seem to get obsessed with the supermodel look and concentrate on a classy sophisticated look, which looks beautiful, no matter what the shape.
    Summing up, look your best, no matter what your figure is, and most importantly, do it in style.

  25. #25
    Silver Member Becky Blue's Avatar
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    I am not sure if I fit into your definition of an 'older lady' I hope not. For me Becky is my motivation to keep healthy and to eat well. I very successfully lost 6kgs 13 Pounds on the 5 2 fast diet, it also changed my eating habits forever. i had to stop the diet as my wife started complaining about being too thin.
    A.K.A Rebecca & Bec

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