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Thread: Forms and pads cross the line...

  1. #76
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    Quote Originally Posted by Emily Occasionally View Post
    If you wear glasses does that make you dysphoric? No. So why would wearing breast forms mean you are? Some people need glasses and other people don't need them. Some people need breast forms and other people don't just like glasses. It's as simple as that. There are other things you can do to improve your sight like contacts or laser surgery but some people just like wearing glasses. The same goes with forms and pads.
    I’m sorry but you can’t compare wearing breast forms or pads to wearing glasses...

    Glasses are designed to be worn by men or women and generally have a functional purpose ie. seeing better or protection from the sun. Breast forms are designed to emulate a woman’s body part with no purpose other than making you look and feel like more like a woman..

    One could therefore argue, that by somebody wanting to emulate a woman’s body part so badly, to the point of wearing coloured globs of rubber hidden under their shirts, it could be seen as a form of gender/body disphoria.

    Also, nobody NEEDS breast forms.

    And for the record, I have NO problem with people wearing forms or pads. As someone who suffers gender and body disphoria to the point of starting HRT, I am wondering where the motivation behind it comes from. I myself, despite my disphoria, have never felt the need or want to go to that extend in my crossdressing and just find it hard to believe others do, without identifying as being disphoric in any way.

    I’m not talking about everybody here, but many of the “crossdresser only” types on this site want to look like a woman, be seen as a woman, be treated like a woman, dress like a woman, talk like a woman, act like a woman, smell like a woman and everything else (like a woman). It’s almost as if they want to be.........a woman. But god forbid ever having that crazy idea.
    Last edited by Kas; 12-05-2018 at 01:50 AM.

  2. #77
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    Mastectomy patients are what breast forms were originally designed for so yes they feel the need to have them.

  3. #78
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    Yes youre right Tracii, thats exactly what i said. To give them their womanly figure back and to make them feel like a "woman" again by emulating their missing body part.

    But it's definitely not as necessary (if at all) in life as being able to see for example. So it is more of a want...

    FYI, I was talking in reference to crossdressing, not breast cancer. Sorry, didn't know i had to make that clear. To all of you mastectomy patients that are reading this, im sorry if i have offended you in any way.
    Last edited by Kas; 12-05-2018 at 02:22 AM.

  4. #79
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    You made yourself perfectly clear and I get what you are saying but I thought I would inject that to be more clear as to who actually needs them.
    No need to make it sound like I am stupid OK?

  5. #80
    Silver Member Becky Blue's Avatar
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    Interesting thread Kas and very topical for me. Firstly I will state for the record I have some level of Dysphoria at times and consider myself GB... most of my GD seems focused on my body hair.

    Recently I had a dress up & makeover day with the wonderful Cindy at Boys Will Be Girls. The day involved 8 looks/outfits. We decided to try one with breast plates which I have never tried before. The results were 'mixed'...

    Positives - I have some very interesting pictures (which I may share on here one day)
    Negatives - They felt completely weird and totally unnatural

    For me dressing is not just how I look, its equally how I feel and I felt completely NOT like the woman I try to be. The most interesting part for me was looking down onto my cleavage did not look right. When I dress I do enjoy making a small natural cleavage and I love looking down at my small natural cleavage. Looking down the the breastplate looked and felt like it was someone else.

    That being said, I am not judging anyone who wears them if it makes them feel good. As for hip pads, I see them no different to fake boobs or a cincher, if thats what makes you feel more womanly then go for it i say.
    A.K.A Rebecca & Bec

  6. #81
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    I agree Becky its just a personal thing.
    Nobody is trying to be fake or mislead anyone.
    I know some trans people have this "authentic" thing and they really don't get it if somebody wears forms or hip pads.
    I work with trans people and its a common thing really and sometimes referred to as "living a lie".
    I have heard that over and over and have watched a few marriage fail over it.
    Last edited by Tracii G; 12-05-2018 at 02:16 AM.

  7. #82
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    I have three bras, stuff all of them, and the reasons are:

    1. I like the look
    2. I like the feel
    3. My femme clothes don't work well without a bra

    I'm a MIAD, and it will remain that way.

    "Choose clothes which are a small cup size..."

    Yeah, that's not the way it works with most femme clothing beyond brassieres.
    Last edited by KelleyB; 12-06-2018 at 03:00 PM. Reason: grammar

  8. #83
    Female Illusionist! docrobbysherry's Avatar
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    Kas, I think u have gotten to the crux of your issue:

    Those here that NEED to present female. And, those that WANT to be seen as a female!

    The lengths to which some T's here will go to look female, opposed to the many who do little, yet r comfortable presenting that way is definitely thot provoking!

    Said the 70+ y/o man who looks like Barbie!
    U can't keep doing the same things over and over and expect to enjoy life to the max. When u try new things, even if they r out of your comfort zone, u may experience new excitement and growth that u never expected.

    Challenge yourself and pursue your passions! When your life clock runs out, you'll have few or NO REGRETS!

  9. #84
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    Quote Originally Posted by Kas View Post
    I’m sorry but you can’t compare wearing breast forms or pads to wearing glasses...

    Glasses are designed to be worn by men or women and generally have a functional purpose ie. seeing better or protection from the sun. Breast forms are designed to emulate a woman’s body part with no purpose other than making you look and feel like more like a woman.

    One could therefore argue, that by somebody wanting to emulate a woman’s body part so badly, to the point of wearing coloured globs of rubber hidden under their shirts, it could be seen as a form of gender/body disphoria.

    Also, nobody NEEDS breast forms.

    And for the record, I have NO problem with people wearing forms or pads. As someone who suffers gender and body disphoria to the point of starting HRT, I am wondering where the motivation behind it comes from. I myself, despite my disphoria, have never felt the need or want to go to that extend in my crossdressing and just find it hard to believe others do, without identifying as being disphoric in any way.

    I’m not talking about everybody here, but many of the “crossdresser only” types on this site want to look like a woman, be seen as a woman, be treated like a woman, dress like a woman, talk like a woman, act like a woman, smell like a woman and everything else (like a woman). It’s almost as if they want to be.........a woman. But god forbid ever having that crazy idea.
    What? No one needs glasses either. You do know that for most of human history glasses didn't exist, right? Especially sunglasses which have only been in existence for about 80 or so years. Yes colored lenses did exist but they were primarily used in medicine to help with various eye based afflictions. Glasses specific for use by people to see in the sun has only been around since the 1930s or so. People got on fine without them for millennia.

    To say that forms have no purpose other than their explicit purpose is just being obtuse. That isn't an argument. Just because you don't like them (I know you are fine with form wearers as people) doesn't mean their purpose isn't a legitimate one. For myself at least I feel like the forms complete the look. I have nothing going on chest-wise. I mean no amount of pushing my pecs around is going to help. I feel fine with my body. Never had a drop of body dysphoria. Forms complete the look of femininity though. That doesn't mean that I curse my male body...it just means I have to buy a little something extra to make the dresses look right.

    I have no real desire (or expectation) that when I (someday, maybe) go out dressed that anyone will treat me like a woman. I can't seem to get a good female voice down. I can't afford perfume and even if I could I don't want to smell like it. I like my Old Spice just fine. I'm not looking to crossdress to be a woman persay...I'm looking to crossdress to be in touch with another aspect of me. I might go Emily but I'm still just me. My male-self doesn't go away. I'm not looking for an escape from reality. I'm seeking the reality of another part of myself. And yes part of that means looking female with forms.

    Shoot. Maybe we all are dysphoric and just don't know it or something. I don't know. Any time I've heard dysphoria described, I've never felt that feeling. So if I haven't felt it how can I identify as being dysphoric? It's kind of like when you have two different languages...they might be related like Spanish and Italian but they are different. If I speak Italian I might be able to identify words and understand and show compassion to a Spanish speaker but I will not be able to fully comprehend the depth of their feelings because different languages make you think and feel in different ways. They program your brain differently. So if I am a man who likes women but also likes to dress as one and be cute sometimes including forms and you are someone who was born with male genitalia who is actually a woman, we can meet and have common ground on this site but I cannot fully understand dysphoric feelings. I can compare them to other things I have felt and offer sympathy and my hand as an ally but I cannot understand fully the desire to change a body (your body) in such a way as SRS or hormones. I can support you and your decisions but it's just not right for me on any level. I've never felt that way before. By the same token, you can read what I have to say but have no frame of reference for being comfortable in your own body and still dressing with pads because...well you haven't felt that way before and I hope that your HRT and SRS bring you to a place where you can feel that level of comfort but as it stands your discomfort is a foreign concept to me and my comfort is just as foreign to you. That doesn't mean our feelings don't exist. It's just the human condition that we can't feel the exact same feelings as someone else. We can't fully understand other people. We can certainly identify but we can't feel the exact same way.

  10. #85
    Isn't Life Grand? AllieSF's Avatar
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    Kas, Can you go into more detail with your issues and need/desire to take hormones to get the feminization affects that you hope for? What confuses me is that you are ready to take hormones or are close to that for what affect? MtF hormone takers generally have, from what I have read, minimal true and significant body changes (breast growth, fat redistribution to the hips, butt and face) when compared to natal/genetic females going through puberty. If you are younger, and from your avatar picture you look younger than a lot of us here, you may exceed the averaged changes as reported here and from many TS's that I know and have talked to. The majority of them have opted for breast implants. Some stop wearing other padding while others do not. It has always been questioned on this site when a CD, which you have stated here that you are, only takes the hormones to grow breasts and maybe get some fat redistribution, because these can be permanent changes that one must live with for the rest of their lives. Thus the usual recommendation to use breast forms and padding.

    You also state that you can't go out into the real world until your body dysmorphia is under control through the use of hormones and resulting hoped for body changes. Those that do go out have all expressed their own inner satisfaction and joy being out there even if they do not pass nor really blend in well. I can't speak for Australia or other countries, but members here from all over our country go out where they live, safely and happily with minimal fuss and issues if any. So, my other question is, if you are using body presentation as your excuse for not going out, if I understand correctly what you have written here, and you want to go put and enjoy what others are enjoying and writing about here, why go to the extreme, and taking hormones is an extreme, to make that happen. Why not just go out without padding and forms and enjoy it. OR, wear some forms and/or padding to do that. It is much less expensive, doesn't mess with your body chemistry and mind, and can be stopped at any time and has no permanent affect on your body? If, you still decide to go the hormone route, do you plan on doing that under medical supervision, which you definitely should do, telling them the truth that you are a crossdresser and not a transsexual, or do you plan on doing it some other way?
    Last edited by AllieSF; 12-05-2018 at 07:20 PM.

  11. #86
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    I agree 100% with what Sarah Louise has said. I am part time crossdresser. I use breastforms when I go out in public dressed 100% en femme from head to toe. I have never considered the need for hip or butt pads. I see no need for hip or butt pads. I am comfortable with just breast forms. I my wardrobe consists of dresser, skirts and blouse along with all of the related undergarments. I live near Atlanta, Ga and in summer it can get awfully warm when wearing breastforms. I wear breastform covers over the breastforms and that helps. I consider myself a crossdresser nothing more. I am completely comfortable with the way I dress. Most of the time I get out dressed en femme about twice a week. I have been going out dressed en femme since 2004. I have never felt the need for any type of counseling. I am happy and content the way I am and the way I dress.

  12. #87
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    Folks often complain about the intolerance of the general public but I see the same level of intolerance right here in this thread. What is the real purpose behind this thread? It seems it is to divide us and cause unnecessary tension. Just like we ask the public to have tolerance, we should ask ourselves the same thing. If some (probably most) of us wear breast forms, why is that someone else's concern? Why should someone hang a label on us? What right does anyone have to hang a label on us?
    Krisi

  13. #88
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    Hmm. Intersting question, Kas.

    I've never really thought about the fact that crossdressing is basically just wearing the clothes of the opposite gender. But going further with forms makes it something slightly more.

    I wouldn't go as far as saying it's dysphoria. But I think it's certainly more than just "Crossdressing".

  14. #89
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    Quote Originally Posted by Krisi View Post
    Folks often complain about the intolerance of the general public but I see the same level of intolerance right here in this thread. What is the real purpose behind this thread? It seems it is to divide us and cause unnecessary tension. Just like we ask the public to have tolerance, we should ask ourselves the same thing. If some (probably most) of us wear breast forms, why is that someone else's concern? Why should someone hang a label on us? What right does anyone have to hang a label on us?
    To be fair, I don't think that was the intention of the OP. Personally, I've found it quite thought-provoking and have been thinking a lot about dysphoria (as in "a state of unease or generalized dissatisfaction"), how and when that applies to me, and how my use of forms and padding fit into that. If I can get it into some sort of order in my mind, I'll post it here but in the meantime I'll continue to follow the main thread with interest.

  15. #90
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    Maybe not the OP but some of the people who responded.
    Krisi

  16. #91
    Silver Member Majella St Gerard's Avatar
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    Some people over think things

  17. #92
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    Exactly Majella

  18. #93
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    My reason is simple: with pads and shape wear, my clothes fit; without forms and shape wear, my clothes do not fit. Like styling my wig, once I decide how I want to look, the rest becomes an engineering problem.

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