I see a lot of posts that include a "wish" to gets one's ears pierced - one day.
I got mine pierced over a year ago. I did it without any intention or idea of using it as part of CD'ing.
I also did it without prior approval or discussion with my SO. We'd had a major argument the day before and I was feeling pretty shitty. I've been struggling with depression for several years and needed a jump start.
I felt fantastic the week after. Too bad I can't get something pierced everytime I'm feeling depressed.
My SO wouldn't even look at me that night. But after some time and heartfelt discussions, she accepts that it's a part of me now.
I just wear small CZ studs. They are larger than the starter studs that are used when you first get them pierced.
I've never tried to convince my wife that I should wear anything more than the studs. The piercings are sure nice when CD'ing though. I do own two pairs of women's earings.
My advice is be honest. Don't act like you want it for another reason, but it's really for CD'ing.
I did it after my 43rd birthday. It really was a spur of the moment thing. Sometimes you need to take the leap and just do it.