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Thread: Do you want to be a Women?

  1. #1
    Member Maria_mtf's Avatar
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    Do you want to be a Women?

    Firstly to clarify I do not mean to transition, I want some points of views from CDs who always plan to keep being a husband/dad/man.

    Basically my Wife is trying to understand more and asked me if I want to be a women, I said no. After watching first dates, there was a CD on there, wife asked do I want to be like him, I don't. He mentioned they are just clothes and in my opinion his look was more androgynous. Wonder if he is on here? (He was great by the way, fair play to him)

    I want to present as a women, full wig makeup and all. But do I want to act like a women too, I guess so. So essentially I want to impersonate a women. Or is it I actually want to be one temporarily. But of course wig/makeup doesnt make you a women.

    I always figured if you want to be a women that means you will probably end up transitioning or living full time en femme. This of course is rubbish as I know gender is a spectrum.

    I think the root of my problem if my wife hears me say I want to be a women she will freak. So can you impersonate a women without wanting to be one? But if you did why would you if you don't want to be one.

    Hopefully at least one person will follow where I am going with this.

    Maria x

  2. #2
    Gold Member Helen_Highwater's Avatar
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    Maria,

    Imitation is the greatest form of flattery. So many of us want to present the best possible facsimile of a female without any intention of ever transitioning. There's a huge difference between those who feel they need to transition, folks born in the wrong body, to those who have feminine traits.

    When I dress to go out I suppose my aim is to "look the part". I feel good about myself, I am comfortable in my own skin. Forms, padding, corset, all help me present well. I suppose I fall somewhere in-between male and female but more towards female. I count myself lucky, I can exist in two worlds and be comfortable in either.
    Last edited by Helen_Highwater; 01-04-2019 at 07:38 PM.
    Who dares wears Get in, get out without being noticed

  3. #3
    Always been a GIRL. Michelle1955's Avatar
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    Yes, started at roughly age 5 or younger. Wanted to be a girl, as older yes a woman. Will I ever have surgery more than likely not. I’m 63 years old, married for nearly 40 years would have to have 100% acceptance from my wife. I manage my fog by dressing or underdressing. Currently a 42A bra / nearly B cup naturally.
    Last edited by Michelle1955; 01-04-2019 at 07:44 PM.

  4. #4
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    I love to dress like a woman to present myself as best I can, but I will not ever be a woman.
    I live in two worlds. I enjoy "man" sports etc. I express my true personality and creativity when dressing en femme though.

  5. #5
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    Yes, I want to be a woman and have started to come out as Transgender in the last couple of months and mostly dress in a feminine manner, complete with daily make up and jewellery...

  6. #6
    Member Leonora's Avatar
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    No I don't, I only under dress at the moment but would love to full dress but I don't think my wife would go for that. For to dress and do feminine things it is just thrilling it just a feeling I get I guess. It a sense of naughtiness I guess is best way for me to explain it. But no I am happy being a male.

  7. #7
    I can only be me Samm's Avatar
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    Hi Maria! My wife and I just had this same conversation about 20 minutes ago. Every now and then she needs a little reassurance that I'm not going to want to transition. She asked tonight how I identified. She said I'm not trans because I don't want to be a woman. And I'm not gay....? Which I'm not lol. I told her I'm perfectly happy being a little bit of both (male/female) I actually had a similar conversation last night at a meet up with 7 other ladies.
    Like I told my wife:
    To me, its more than "just the clothes"
    Do I want to transition? No
    Do I feel I'm in the wrong body? No
    Do I feel I'm more male than female? Absolutely. But there is some "girl" in there.

    I'm still, and always will be, the same guy she married. But that doesn't mean I don't like to get pretty once or twice a week

    But hey, that's just me
    "Samm" Sammara Michaels

    I also speak fluent sarcasm

  8. #8
    Gold Member Alice Torn's Avatar
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    No. For a while I thought about it,, but i can never be one. i can never have a baby etc, so can never fully be one. i also realize i will need all my guy side just to survive, in the things just ahead in our country and world, when mere survival will be the big issue. A very old wise man who is no longer with us, made it very clear to me long ago.
    Last edited by Shelly Preston; 01-05-2019 at 07:38 AM. Reason: some things are not allowed

  9. #9
    Member Diane Taylor's Avatar
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    Can't speak for everyone, but I've never had any though to being or becoming a woman. I'm perfectly happy dressing like one.

  10. #10
    Miss Judy Judy-Somthing's Avatar
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    I love being a guy and have no interest of being a woman but, I definitely am addicted to dressing up like one.
    "This is ME" I am not CRAZY, I'm just a GUY who likes dresses!
    Since allot of men dress up in woman's clothing that makes it a manly thing to do!
    Much more fun than fishing.
    I do construction like house building and I love CD-ing, what's the difference?

  11. #11
    Aspiring Artist Kelly DeWinter's Avatar
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    Whatever you decide to tell your spouse, try to remember that if it's not true, changing your mind and telling her something different later will just cause misery.
    Kelly DeWinter
    Find Kelly at:
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    [COLOR=#2e8b57

  12. #12
    Senior Member JocelynJames's Avatar
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    Hi Maria,
    I once told my wife it was like an acting role and I wanted to play a woman the best I could , but when the role is over I’m still me. I think we’re lucky if we can embrace and be both. For a while when I wasn’t feelin it, it was pretty depressing.
    If you only knew the power of the pink fog! ~Joss

  13. #13
    silicone member Danielle_cder's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Judy-Somthing View Post
    I love being a guy and have no interest of being a woman but, I definitely am addicted to dressing up like one.
    yep this!
    the only limit that u set, is the one u set yourself.

  14. #14
    Member FrannGurl's Avatar
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    I'm out to a few platonic male friends, most of my immediate family, and several women I know.

    Most by choice, others by accident. I've also lost a few friends because of it, but maybe they weren't friends to begin with.
    That being said, I'm as comfortable in my situation as I want to be right now. Later that may or may not change, I cant really say.

    Would I like to live as a woman full time?

    The answer is yes, IF ...IF society and my family were more accepting....Just where I'm at right now, has caused a great deal of pain in the past.

    Would I like to actually transition with surgery?


    No, Im happy with the way I was made....Well, aside from wanting B cup boobies

  15. #15
    Aspiring Member ToniG's Avatar
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    No interest in transitioning, but understand that some are. No SO to worry abt here--so no concerns in that area. But--- IF I go back to work in my "profession"-which is aerospace/mil/defence mfg---there are background-checks, security-clearance checks, and other anal exams to anticipate. Content as part-time Dresser, and try to blend and present as well as possible. Toni G..
    "Seen by Many---Clocked by Any??"
    In the Snowbird Zone

  16. #16
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    I've never thought of becoming a women I was always envious as a child because girls/women got such nicer clothes and got pampered more . So that's what I want now

  17. #17
    Member Karen G's Avatar
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    It's a little complicated to explain sometimes. For me, I'm very happy being a dude who crossdresses, but also, honestly, I would have been really happy to be born as a woman, but the bottom line is, in any case I would like and need my wife to be in any of those lives. About transitioning, it's not for me since I would be as happy being a man or a woman who likes women. So for me: Straight crossdresser man or a lesbian woman.
    Just a girl.

  18. #18
    Junior Member jen_ross's Avatar
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    I do not want to be a woman full time but i like to wear some women's things. Would I prefer to have been born as a woman? Maybe if in the U.S. in similar circumstances to which I was born as a male. I don't know though, men as mates are no picnic, myself included. For that matter being a woman is not easy either. Each gender comes with its own bonuses and burdens. I look at beautiful women including news anchors on TV and think I just want to be them. But I think it's just a fantasy.
    Last edited by jen_ross; 01-05-2019 at 12:28 PM.

  19. #19
    New "old" girl Suzie Petersen's Avatar
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    ToniG: But--- IF I go back to work in my "profession"-which is aerospace/mil/defence mfg---there are background-checks, security-clearance checks, and other anal exams to anticipate.
    If they are requiring "anal" exams then you should probably be a little suspicious of that particular 3-letter agency 😁

  20. #20
    Female Illusionist! docrobbysherry's Avatar
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    I think u omitted other options, Maria. Many of us r happy to just imagine we FEEL like women or LOOK like women.

    In my case I could NEVER appear to be the woman I would wish to be so those thots vanished years ago. For the last 10 years I've to concentrate on APPEARING to be one in my photos and mirror! I guess I fit in your, "female impersonator" group!
    U can't keep doing the same things over and over and expect to enjoy life to the max. When u try new things, even if they r out of your comfort zone, u may experience new excitement and growth that u never expected.

    Challenge yourself and pursue your passions! When your life clock runs out, you'll have few or NO REGRETS!

  21. #21
    Platinum Member
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    Quote Originally Posted by Helen_Highwater View Post
    Maria,

    Imitation is the greatest form of flattery.
    Many women will tell you a man wearing women's clothing is demeaning and in no sense flattering. Decades ago my wife and I had "The Talk." Yes, the same questions. I said something that upon reflection was totally stupid. I mumbled something about 'my inner woman." She shot back something to the effect, "When you can have a baby, tell me about your inner woman." This was way before transgender issues were ever thought about in current day context. I had to tell her "I do not know why I do what I do!" I wished I did not do it. It has nothing to do with her. Long ago I gave up trying to make sense of it.

    The best I can come up with is what a counselor I know said to me. She feels each man or woman has some degree of dna of the opposite sex within their dna. In some it is stronger than others. That may explain a lot. Maybe she's wrong. But, that's the best I got to offer my wife.

    Now, when Stephanie arises within me for whatever reason, she wants to emulate her ideal woman. It is a lot more than a man in a dress. It is also personna.

    Why would a man risk losing family, friends, job, church, neighbors, everything by wearing women's clothing? There is no rational to it.

    You could answer your wife by saying what I would say, "If I was not a man, I would want to be a woman."

  22. #22
    AKA Lexi sometimes_miss's Avatar
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    As a kid, I was told that god had made a mistake, and that I was really supposed to be a girl. This was initially a shock to me, but as he gave his reasons why he believed this, it sort of made sense. And then, once believing it, I started to see other things about my life that pointed in that direction as well. By the time I got to high school, I truly believed that I was supposed to be a girl, and I had thought that god would 'fix me' at some point, and I would someday wake up as a normal girl. I had prayed and prayed, but of course, god never answered. But apparently the damage was done. After growing up and believing that I was truly a girl for so long during my developmental years, it was stuck in my brain. Despite learning the differences between males and females personality, as well as all the differences in how we behave, communicate and how we see the world differently, there's always this lingering feeling that I'm in the wrong clothes, and in the wrong role in life, as if I'm a young teen female waiting to become a woman.
    But I have never had any plans to transition, as there is no way I could ever have had a normal female life, even if I had gotten testosterone blockers at a young enough age, female HRT, and SRS. My body is simply in no way feminine at all. So I'm lucky that my GID isn't severe.
    My only real regret is that I cannot have a normal relationship with a woman, as none that I have ever known would accept me once she knew about my past, my predeliction for female behaviors and feelings, especially my strong desire to wear clothes that are currently reserved for females only.

    My own personal belief is that women have always been reliant upon men for protection and as providers, so anything that brings into question that they might not at some point be all that for her, makes us unacceptable as a potential mate. It's simple insecurity. I understand. It's been bred into human females for so many thousands if not millions of years, that I think it's a genetic predispositon for them to not want anything to do with feminine men. Even though I understand, and have to accept it, it does leave me very lonely sometimes, when I have to face that I will never have a long term relationship again. Oh well. Better to have loved and lost, than to never have loved at all, I guess.
    Last edited by sometimes_miss; 01-05-2019 at 01:47 AM.
    Some causes of crossdressing you've probably never even considered: My TG biography at:http://www.crossdressers.com/forums/...=1#post1490560
    There's an addendum at post # 82 on that thread, too. It's about a ten minute read.
    Why don't we understand our desire to dress, behave and feel like a girl? Because from childhood, boys are told that the worst possible thing we can be, is a sissy. This feeling is so ingrained into our psyche, that we will suppress any thoughts that connect us to being or wanting to be feminine, even to the point of creating separate personalities to assign those female feelings into.

  23. #23
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    I'm not really passable but being dressed I try to be the best in the feminine I can be if that is wanting to be a woman. The most important to my feminine self is having sisters online and in the flesh that can truly relate. I didn't choose this girl she chose me and it would be hell walking this road by your self.

  24. #24
    Platinum Member Beverley Sims's Avatar
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    In the past, the fact that I could pass well made me want to keep up the masquerade.
    Work on your elegance,
    and beauty will follow.

  25. #25
    mini kilted chick t-girlxsophie's Avatar
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    No,I don't want to be a woman,there's enough I like to do as a man to want to keep being one.But I do have the overwhelming desire to,as it says in my signature,emulate a woman,which I try to do to the best of my ability,although very understanding my wife is also my biggest critic,she'll soon tell me if I'm making any faux pa's along the way

    In my 50s now nearer the end of life than the beginning.I just want to enjoy this life I have where a huge part of it involves being Sophie

    Sophie
    We look to Scotland,for all our Ideas of Civilisation-Voltaire

    ========================================

    A woman who loves to wear beautiful clothes is like a flower.
    A man who loves to emulate these women is a special flower-a rose
    Facebook:Sophie Johnson

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