Page 4 of 4 FirstFirst ... 234
Results 76 to 87 of 87

Thread: Dealing With Male Attention...

  1. #76
    Member CourtneyJamieson's Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2015
    Location
    Midwest US
    Posts
    205
    When I am out and dressed at a club I want the attention of men. That adds to my feelings of being attractive and looking Fem. I've had some wonderful times with some really great guys that I have met while out. I am disappointed if I don't have at least a few guys come up to me and try to pick me up.

  2. #77
    Of course she is. Patience's Avatar
    Join Date
    Feb 2018
    Location
    The question is not where, but when.
    Posts
    1,307
    Can you describe the kind of things that happen in those situations, Courtney?

    I’m all for flirty fun, but wouldn’t want to mislead anyone or give false hopes.
    When all else fails, lower your standards.

  3. #78
    Member
    Join Date
    Mar 2017
    Location
    East Coast USA
    Posts
    111
    Micki, good advice. I would add don't be shocked if there are times when that ring and statement are not enough to end the situation.

  4. #79
    Seňora Member Robertacd's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2004
    Location
    Bellingham, Wa
    Posts
    3,333
    I had to deal with some unwanted male attention last night. I was down at the local club where I usually spend my Friday evenings. Last night my wife was not in the mood so it was just me, my son, and a GG friend of mine met up with us later. We were hanging out, drinking, and occasionally dancing. A guy was chatting us all up but seemed to really like me. He asked me to dance and being me I obliged. On the dance floor he got very... well aggressive we'll say touching me. Once I had enough I pushed him away turned around and walked back to my table. He kind acted upset I told him not to touch me again. He was still hanging around and I decided to go the the restroom. When I came out of the restroom my GG friend grabbed me and said "Don't go back to the table, that creepy guy was asking lots of creepy questions about you, and we are trying to get rid of him". So I went outside for a few minutes and when I came back in he was gone.

    I am lucky I have friends that look out for me.
    Some things you lose and some things you just give away...

  5. #80
    Ah-May-Lee
    Join Date
    Nov 2005
    Location
    Mid Hudson Forensic
    Posts
    1,206
    As with anything in life, there is good and bad with any situation and dealing with men is no different.

    I get guys messing with me. If I am in a scene like a bar that is to be expected. But if I'm walking home at night it's not a very pleasant thing. Some of the hoods I lived in were dangerous for a man to walk alone, so it would not be any safer for a woman. One just has to get street smarts and be able to read a situation before it happens.

    But for a man to come up and talk to me is no big deal. Ya never know he might turn out to be my prince charming.

    One advantage I have is that most guys are scared of me, scared of the way I look and are too timid to even try talking to me. I give off this "keep away" sort of vibe. Also living in a bad neighborhood the guy that sees me might think I am the bad person walking alone at night, that I am the one that is dangerous.

    I don't go to malls and such places, I am mostly a night time person. I don't run into too many people during the day.
    "Walking across the thin ice of my dreams, Fearing the cold waters of reality beneath me. Yet onward I tred."

  6. #81
    Senior Member Aunt Kelly's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2016
    Location
    Greater Houston
    Posts
    1,977
    For those who don't pass (most of us), the dynamic is usually different. Of course, I'm talking about tranny chasers. At my age, the few I have encountered are old enough to have learned how a gentleman behaves, and they politely, even gallantly take a subtle hint that it's not going to happen. In a similar vein, there's what I'll call sport flirting, the social dance where everyone knows it's a game. That's just good fun when, again, the players are refined enough to know what the stakes are. Some of my younger, hetero CD friends have, I suspect, a harder time.
    For all of who present as female, the world, or what in my trade we refer to as "the threat landscape", looks very different. Situational awareness is more important, and different strategy and tactics are required. The cis women reading this are nodding (or saying, "Well, duh!"), but they've learned those things over a lifetime. We, on the other hand got a late start.
    You know what? I think I'll look into finding an expert on self defense for women who'd be willing to put together a presentation for us novices. I'm sure it's been done, but not around these parts Hmmm...

  7. #82
    New Member
    Join Date
    Sep 2018
    Posts
    5
    i have yet to venture out, but i think i might be more concerned about my tendency to smile at women and perhaps give them the wrong impression... or would that be the right impression....

  8. #83
    Fancy For Feet Palaina Nocturnus's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2019
    Location
    Phoenix, AZ
    Posts
    111
    Hello Patience,

    I always love reading about someone getting to experience the feeling of going out dressed in its earliest stages! Even now there are still places and situations I have yet to experience while en femme, but overall I've been going out for about 17 years now

    I can sit here for hours and tell you of all the wonderful things that can accompany a man and how they treat you. I've had a LOT of boyfriends and partners over my 20 years as a CD so yes there have been a few downsides.

    You ask about consequences. I'm not prideful but I've been told by every guy I meet that I'm this adjective or that (lately the word goddess keeps getting used and I'm like uh no lol do not call me that) and it is very flattering. I've noticed way more females are attracted to me as well once they see my feminine side. I eat it up inside getting that kind of attention, I stay humble about it. There's a reason I'm bringing this all up.

    You are pretty, I can imagine you going out and getting hit on. You're vibing with just being out and dressed, not once thinking about a date and along comes a man. In my experience it has gone one of 2 ways.

    The first kind of guys are nice, shy, loud, proudly gay, sweet lol I'd say the ones more in touch with their feminine side. They understand touch, sensuality and boundaries. It can be better than awesome until you get the guy saying he loves you on the first date while in bed together. Ummmm no lol not all are that clingy but the love is def there

    Then there's the MAN man, the guy that sees you as he sees any female. These guys are the macho bro type of dudes lol hygiene usually takes a back seat with this group but that is not a bad thing lol these guys are more the swoop you up in their arms and command you around type. It can be a huge turn on when done respectfully however there are those that get very forceful and very mean very quick.

    I know just like our community there are far more types than I am exploiting here but the main point I am trying to make is this. Be careful and be very open with anyone you speak to while dressed up. Always be up front when you feel a boundary is being tested and never feel obligated to stick around and hope things get better. If a man is coming up to you because he finds you attractive he's already accepted that he's about to talk to another male that's en femme. Now the manner and tact that they use to begin the conversation should help you to understand what they may already want from you. You'd be surprised how many guys are going to a gay bar for the first time just because they're sick of women and just wanted to vent to someone. And yes there's always the guys saying they've never done this before lol

    I wish I could end on a better note but do be careful when you choose events or bars to go to while dressed up. In my experience if the bar is for gay men only, I've never been welcome or approached and def not hit on. Its the same with a female lesbian establishment. Not every place is that way and more places are joining the LGBTQ concept however some places cater to a specific crowd and they're ok with keeping others out. I'm fine with not going in lol

    Take care hun and have a fantabulous day!!!!!!!!
    Last edited by Palaina Nocturnus; 10-08-2019 at 01:40 PM.
    Live, laugh, love!

  9. #84
    Yeah Ok like whatever Tracii G's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2008
    Location
    Between here and there but mostly here close to the donuts.
    Posts
    21,407
    Quote Originally Posted by MarinaTwelve200 View Post
    Makes sense to me too. It's why I can't understand GAY guys who want to dress up as WOMEN themselves.---------Do they wanna attract STRAIGHT men? WHY? A true Straight man wants nothing to do with Gay sex.
    I am gay but a transgender woman so I dress like a woman for me not for men.
    Your comment is slightly sexist IMO but you are free to feel that way so I really have no problem with you saying that
    I would love to find a gay man that would accept me for me but they can tend to be sexist just like straight men.
    Plus being big doesn't help either when it comes to dating.
    Last edited by Tracii G; 10-08-2019 at 01:47 PM.
    Head Executive Chief of the Dept of Redundancy Dept.

  10. #85
    Seňora Member Robertacd's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2004
    Location
    Bellingham, Wa
    Posts
    3,333
    Quote Originally Posted by MarinaTwelve200 View Post
    Makes sense to me too. It's why I can't understand GAY guys who want to dress up as WOMEN themselves.---------Do they wanna attract STRAIGHT men? WHY? A true Straight man wants nothing to do with Gay sex.

    I have to agree with Tracii here, don't fall into that sexist trap of thinking everything a Woman does, she does for the sole purpose of attracting men.

    I dress for myself and to impress other women. Attracting a man is the last thing on Earth I want to do.
    Some things you lose and some things you just give away...

  11. #86
    Senior Member 5150 Girl's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2009
    Location
    Zanesville OH
    Posts
    1,535
    If I'm at work, I just tell them I'm married, and show the ring.
    If I'm at a bar or something, I tell them I'm a married lesbian.

  12. #87
    Member CourtneyJamieson's Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2015
    Location
    Midwest US
    Posts
    205
    Hi Patience,
    I guess we all here have our wants and desires. Some go out dressed and have NO desire to be admired and I TOTALLY understand that.. Others like to be admired but have no intention of going any further and I TOTALLY understand that!. I fall into the category of going out as a "girl" and wanting to be admired as a "girl". So when I am out I WELCOME the attention of men and love to be "hit-on". That is why I dress and go out. So, yes, I do meet men and other CDs. And, yes, I love the attention. And, yes, it does sometimes lead to other things which I totally am agreeable with and seek out. This is just "ME"....Not for everyone.

Tags for this Thread

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •  


Check out these other hot web properties:
Catholic Personals | Jewish Personals | Millionaire Personals | Unsigned Artists | Crossdressing Relationship
BBW Personals | Latino Personals | Black Personals | Crossdresser Chat | Crossdressing QA
Biker Personals | CD Relationship | Crossdressing Dating | FTM Relationship | Dating | TG Relationship


The crossdressing community is one that needs to stick together and continue to be there for each other for whatever one needs.
We are always trying to improve the forum to better serve the crossdresser in all of us.

Browse Crossdressers By State