Born or reborn as a female??

[Jenny22]

Since I've been a member (3 years), there have been countless members who have expressed that they wish they had been born as a female. As a boy, I'd often pray at bedtime that I would wake up as a girl. As a man, and envying everything about women, I wanted to become as close to representing as a female as I could and thus feel as feminine as I could. Most of you know the story, as you've probably been down the same path.

But there is a problem in so badly wanting to be a female. If actually born or reborn as a female, you would never think 'Wow! It happened just as I wanted' UNLESS you had the memories of the male you were who wanted to be a female. If you did not have those 'male memories', you'd simply be just another female who was born on Earth.

Make sense?

BTW, wouldn't it then be funny you being born as a female who wished she was born as a male?

[Leonora]

I love your perspective, it makes a lot of sense.

[Macey]

Maybe that'll be the next lifetime … spent missing your male side as much as you currently miss your female side. Hopefully, another 'go' or two around reincarnation and we'll all have a nice smooth blend

[Lisa516]

The next life time would be great to be a girl.. I hope!! i can't stop thinking , looking, wanting,,,,,,,,

Sincerely;
Lisa

[Lydianne]

This is why the blue pill is also a valid solution. As unpalatable as it might seem before you take it, afterwards, you'd be equally as comfortable in male gender and clothing as a properly gender-aligned genetic female would be in hers.

( Assuming one views proper gender alignment as being preferrable to this conflict. We all vary on this ).

- Lydianne.

[Shelly Preston]

Please don't forget that there other things to consider.

Remember there are also Females who wish to become Male.

Not so funny really just the other side of the same coin.

[Sabrina133]

Interesting. We have a massage therapist who has an amazing ability to "read" your unconscious thoughts. After a session a few months ago, she said to me "you knonw, i think i finally figured you out, you were a woman in two previous lives..." So maybe this time out, fate decided I was going to be male but couldn't quite purge the previous lives from my being.

[Vicky_Scot]

I would love to come back as a female but only on the basis that I had the memories of the male I had been who wanted to be a female. that would be heaven. x

[SaraLin]

Since the subject of past lives has come up, here's what I've got.

1. wife of well-to-do merchant in 'western' days (wooden sidewalks, muddy streets, horses). I remember being disgusted with the way it was almost impossible to keep the skirts of my dresses clean. I died in childbirth in that one.

2.(brief flash) during the plague in europe. I was in the hospital begging a doctor to save my children. I even offered myself to him if he would. He tiredly said "there's nothing I can do" and walked away.

3.(another brief flash) on a hillside on a sunny day with my boyfriend. We were both young, and making out. I could feel his hands finding their way through all the layers of clothing (full length skirt, petticoat, etc. and was in heaven even though we both knew we shouldn't be doing it.

4 (another flash just a couple weeks ago) eagerly waiting for my man to get home from work. the anticipation an excitement were wonderful. I'm guessing I must have been a newly wed in that one, but I'm not sure.

Sure - you could write them off as imagination, but no other imaginary thing I've thought about carried the weight of emotion that these did.

Anyway - trying to get back to topic, I now think that my dysphoria is somehow related to some "left over" stuff from a past life. Either that or I was, indeed, born into the wrong body this time around.

Ah well... whaddaya gonna do?

[Cristy2]

I could f I now think that my dysphoria is somehow related to some "left over" stuff from a past life. Either that or I was, indeed, born into the wrong body this time around.

You mean like unfinished business from the previous life?

[SaraLin]

You mean like unfinished business from the previous life?

Ummm - yes?

I can't tell you how many times I've agonized over whether what I'm feeling is:
something I'm meant to feel - and deal with,
something I'm supposed to DO (transition),
something that "got carried forward" from a previous life and is interfering with this one ...
.
.
.
or maybe something as simple as something that happened in THIS life - whether biological or emotional.

In the long run, I've learned that whatever the cause, I'm still who I am and I have to find my own path.
All the "what if's" and "shoulda, woulda, coulda's" can't change that simple truth.

(but in my heart, there still isn't a day goes by when I don't wish ...)

[Lydianne]

If you were reborn as a properly gender-aligned female and destiny refused to release you from this stranglehold so cheaply and you were to find yourself in a relationship with one of us,.. without the benefit of your previous life's conflicted male experiences to draw from, what would be the chances that you would be accepting?...

...Somewhere around the same as the chances of finding an accepting SO right now, perhaps?

Scary, no? .

- Lydianne.

[Beverley Sims]

Your last sentence has it all.

That is probably what I would want to do.

[Gillian Gigs]

Jenny22, your post makes me think that this old adage is also true for CD'ers. "The grass is always greener on the other side of the fence". True happiness tends to happen when you are able live within your circumstance, not continually wishing to be somewhere, or something else!

[ShelbyDawn]

I did some past life regression therapy a few years ago and had very vivid memories of being a young girl around the turn of the last century and then again a young woman about 1920's. In every instance I was extremely happy, happier than I can ever remember being in my current life, and had a very fulfilling life. I think that perhaps, my crossdressing is an effort to regain that lost happiness and that is why it is so much about the way I feel and not the way I look.

I really like who I am now but wouldn't object if I woke up as a woman tomorrow morning, even having to deal with all the issues Lexi pointed out, I mean if nothing else, my favorite panties would fit a little better.

[Cristy2]

I did some past life regression therapy a few years ago and had very vivid memories of being a young girl around the turn of the last century and then again a young woman about 1920's. )

I thought about doing that once. There are a few gaps in the timeline I would love to fill in. I know I was born in 1856 and my mother and older sister died when I was nine, but other than my mother and sisters death, I can't remember much of anything about my childhood. My brothers and younger sister and I stayed close up until the Great War broke out and I don't remember much after the war. Last date I can remember is New Years 1920, so I assume I died some time around then because I had been seriously ill all that winter.

[Ressie]

You might come back as a woman if it involves a karmic lesson that must be learned. Pretty deep huh? Don't know if I believe in reincarnation but it sure is interesting.

[Sissy Sandy]

I would rather be what I am now
though I love dressing and would love someone to help me look more like a woman
I still like women and my male bits
I have a fantasy of being force feminized though and maybe having breasts
maybe come back as a hermaphrodite and have the best of both worlds

[JenniferMBlack]

What if you were a girl in your previous life? And that is why you have such strong feelings to be female? This is just what you remember from your previous life.you dont know you were but there is still the pull in your brain that you are. If you were then born female what of you then feel the Male in your brain?

[Elizabeth G]

Hi Jenny,

I have had and continue to have these exact same thoughts and wishes, right down to the male memories play of it. I don't expect them to ever go away.

Elizabeth

[Tina June]

No matter how, if, or when, I'll take that chance.

[AllieBellema]

I do have my moments where I wish I could wakeup in a womans body and been starting to feel lately that there is a woman inside me that wants to be let out. No wonder everytime I do dress up, I start to feel increasingly happier than my everyday working male self. And yeah, wishing this is a two way street as there are women out there that wish they were men.

[Teresa]

Jenny ,
There lies the problem , obviously it depends on the severity of our GD but being born male with a female trait gives us the opportunity to ask this question and debate the possible answers here on the forum .

I guess we need to analyse why we ask this question , what is really the bottom line of it .

Lets try and find some answers . The obvious one is we can dress in clothes we choose without anyone caring , well I do that anyway . I want a smooth body , OK we can find ways to deal with body hair .

To ask more basic questions , would you like to be a woman so you can have children ? That very rarely comes on anyone's list .
You'd like to be a woman so youy could have a relationship with a man ? Again that very rarely comes up and nothing stops us doing that anyway .

I'm sure I can think of many others as I'm sure you all can but is it a case of the grass being greener ?

Perhaps we should we ask the question are we better off being TG ? For those who still want the WOW FACTOR , being TG is the best situation .

Then there is the fly in the ointment , since dressing full time in my new home town I want less and less to be seen in male mode . OK I'm not a woman but I'm happier , comfortable and more content being Teresa . The question is would I be as content as that if I were a woman ? Is full transition the Utopia we hope for ? I'm not 100% convinced it is .

Perhaps we should accept our lot and tell ourselves this is as good as it gets , at my age it possibly is .

[SaraLin]

If actually born or reborn as a female, you would never think 'Wow! It happened just as I wanted' UNLESS you had the memories of the male you were who wanted to be a female. If you did not have those 'male memories', you'd simply be just another female who was born on Earth.

and THAT's exactly what I wish had happened - No lifetime of feeling myself a misfit, No traumatic effects from being 'caught' in the wrong clothes while trying to express my true self, no lying awake at night begging God to fix his mistake, No suicidal thoughts about just 'making the pain stop', no living in constant fear of being rejected/ beaten / killed for what I am.

and NO memories of such things.

To just live a normal, happy life as the girl I was meant to be - and never have dysphoria enter into the picture at all - there is no downside to that in my book.


As others have said - maybe next time around.

[sometimes_miss]

As a man, and envying everything about women

Uh, no. You do NOT envy everything about being a women.
You want to be weaker? More vulnerable to physical and sexual attack? Being judged strictly by your appearance (which would be fine if you're going to be beautiful, but let's remember that only a very few women are naturally gorgeous)? Go through that monthly 'thing' (I don't know if I'm allowed to write that here, having just been reprimanded for something else verboten), and the associated health problems that go with it (such as endometriosis)? Childbirth and the stress incontinence that many women wind up with after it? Being prone to urinary tract infections? Breast cancer? Being considered by many to be less likely to be able to show up for work due to being female (and all the associated things that go with it, such as being a mom, etc)? You want to be considered more likely to be unstable due to your emotions? Or your hormones being responsible for your decisions? You really want to wear physically more uncomfortable clothing? And have to buy clothes more often and get lesser quality things? Have to wake up an hour or more earlier every day to do your make up and hair? Develop bunions on your feet, knee and low back problems from wearing heels? Have to carry a handbag EVERYWHERE all the time? (try it; get a camera bag, keep everything that you usually carry in your pockets in that bag, and do it for a few months. I assure you, you'll get very tired of that bag). The list just goes on and on. I'm not saying that men have it easy either, but we simply have different problems, and you're probably only feeling the ones that men do. Women have a lot to deal with, too.

But there is a problem in so badly wanting to be a female. If actually born or reborn as a female, you would never think 'Wow! It happened just as I wanted' UNLESS you had the memories of the male you were who wanted to be a female. If you did not have those 'male memories', you'd simply be just another female who was born on Earth.

Basically, all you really need is to have your GID solved. Unfortunately, we don't have any way to treat that easily. I've had the same thoughts; wanting to be female. When I was much younger, I thought about what it would be like to transition; but as a straight male, becoming a big ugly gay female would bring about a whole new bunch of problems. Perhaps if I had magically become a girl by age about 13 when I had expected to, maybe life would have been better, having the GID problem gone. I'll never know.