You mean i'll be unable to control it? I'll eventually have to be dressed 24/7 even if I only do it because it turns me on? That scares me to death
You mean i'll be unable to control it? I'll eventually have to be dressed 24/7 even if I only do it because it turns me on? That scares me to death
It sounds like you are feeling very guilty about your dressing. If I can ask, why is it that you dress? Is it because you are expressing the other half of your persona, or is there another reason? If you grew up in a very strict household with tons of rules that could not be broken "or else", then this may be a feeling that is triggered by your dressing. As a child, everyone in my immediate family knew that I was different and liked women's clothing and shoes, and the simple - "you better stop doing this" has been with me all these years. I used to be so scared even just to venture out of the house, except under the cover of darkness when no one seemed to be around...and afterwards, it was the hurry up and change and hide all my things again. There is no law that says you aren't allowed to dress however you like but if you are worried about "what others will think" more than anything else, it will create that lonely, scared feeling
You mean i'll be unable to control it? I'll eventually have to be dressed 24/7 even if I only do it because it turns me on? That scares me to death
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Turns me on, I feel like i'm doing something really naughty and shocking.
I've read your responses. There are two issues you are facing; dressing as a woman and getting turned on. Many people would view any man wearing women's clothing as "shocking" in itself. Add outfits that would be 'shocking' on a woman is the other issue. You are really going to attract attention whether or not you make into a passable woman. Obviously, either way you're not going to 'blend' into the environment. To me it sounds as a little exhibitionist? Of course. woman do dress to turn themselves or others on. Whether you're a woman or a male cross dresser you're going to "feel you're doing something really naughty and shocking."
When I was in my twenties and thirties my dressing style was to appear as an attractive woman but not as a provocative woman trying to allure others. Applying how I feel as a man and what attracted me to woman I did not go to the provocative teasing look. I was attracted to women who offered mystery. They were alluring to me.
I don't know what you mean by "controlling it?" And further "dressing 24/7 even if you only do it because it turns me on?" What do you or would you wear to 'turn yourself on' and what really constitutes your definition of 'turning yourself on?"
Last edited by Stephanie47; 01-11-2019 at 11:16 AM. Reason: spelling
I mean what I become too addicted it's just uncontrollable to the point that I won't ever be able to date or get married while keeping this as a hobby I only engage in when alone and don't feel repressed or stressed if I don't do it, so that I don't actually have to tell anyone about it.
Hey Tolerant Maybe I was a little over the top about the control part , just relax and everything will work itself out , have some fun
It takes time to rid yourself of these feelings.
Work on your elegance,
and beauty will follow.
If you want to date and get married you will be able to date and get married, dont panic
I think people mostly mean that it would be difficult to cut out the dressing completely, we all gravitate toward activities we enjoy. Of course it is possible to get addicted to pretty much anything in an unhealthy way.
Feel free to continue exploring your desires and sexuality but try not to judge yourself too harshly.
Sounds like you are pretty young. So it turns you on, you don't feel good about it, and it isn't something you can make go away - that is scary. Many of us have been there. If you read this forum it sometimes seems like there is a requirement to go out, pass, act a certain way, etc. That is not true. Don't push yourself to go places or do things that are too uncomfortable or leaves you feeling disgusted. CDing can totally dominate your life or just be an interesting, albeit, sometimes difficult aspect. It can be isolating socially (which I found the the most depressing part of it) but it doesn't have to be - I've been happily married to a CD friendly woman for many years. Although CDing can seem narcissistic at times, it can also make you a better, more empathetic person. You 'are not' responsible for becoming a crossdresser; it is not something you chose. You 'are' responsible for how you handle the crossdressing. That will be part of your challenge in this life.
Some causes of crossdressing you've probably never even considered: My TG biography at:http://www.crossdressers.com/forums/...=1#post1490560
There's an addendum at post # 82 on that thread, too. It's about a ten minute read.
Why don't we understand our desire to dress, behave and feel like a girl? Because from childhood, boys are told that the worst possible thing we can be, is a sissy. This feeling is so ingrained into our psyche, that we will suppress any thoughts that connect us to being or wanting to be feminine, even to the point of creating separate personalities to assign those female feelings into.
TolerantCD
It's possible that you'll find a girlfriend that likes your kinky side. I've had a couple throughout the years and many CDs have accepting wives. I'm actually very much like you and at 65 I've lived with it for a long time. Starting 40 years ago I have told the truth to any GF that developed into a relationship. Most didn't like the idea but they tolerated it. A couple ended up telling others my secret yet my live didn't end. And a couple of them had no problem sharing my CDing during sex.
And don't listen to those that say you can't stop. What they mean is you probably can't stop forever. But you can stop temporarily. You can start by going one day without dressing and masturbating.
What would make you feel better would be to stop being so serious about it. You're imagining what could happen in the future and that is what's causing the anxiety. Also reliving the past brings on guilt. So be here now - stay in the moment rather than thinking of possible future events. Stop saying "what if" and "I can't"!
"You're the only one to see the changes you take yourself through", Stevie Wonder
The whole getting turned on sexually is common so chill out and don't worry so much.
For most that turned on feeling goes away in time.
Seems to me you are not transgender or transsexual and just have a kink for dressing up.
Just because you like to dress up doesn't mean you are gay or that it will get worse over time thats just silly.
You feel guilt because guys aren't supposed to wear womens clothes so it makes you feel its wrong or that it must mean you are gay and that dressing will make you start chasing men. Nothing could be further from the truth.
You sound like a straight guy with a kink.
You sound like a very young person that is not really sure about much of anything except your sex drive.
Geez. From now on I'm starting every post reply with, "I totally agree with Tracii." I just wish she'd spell her name right.
If you want accurate responses, please state your age in your profile. I've been playing dress up for excitement for over fifty years. It's a comfort zone
and a turn on. I have no desire to transition as I know I'm male and celebrate being male with a special gift of gender exploration. The thrill of the scandal is
part of the program for me. Once you get to the other side of self acceptance, this becomes a truly wonderful proclivity. Ninety-nine percent of all stress we
endure was brought to us by someone else. So, why dump more on yourself.
Just enjoy the ride without the load of guilt.
I've waited so long for this time. Makeup is so frustrating. Shaking hands and I look so old. This was a mistake.
My new maid's outfit is cute. Sure fits tight.
And then I step into the bedroom and in the mirror, I see a beautiful woman looking back at me.
Smile, Honey! You look fabulous!
Nothing to feel guilt or shame about it it is the fault of society that has a lack of acceptance.
Enjoy what you enjoy as life is short and we should make the most of it we can.
Dear, while that is possible, it is not probable. Anything in excess can be unhealthy. However it is not uncommon to get lost in something new and exciting for a while, only to leave it later. You need to figure this out. And like others said, it is not going to help you fretting over it. Just try to keep things in check by setting some boundaries. This is life sweetheart, no garuntees as to the outcome.