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Thread: voice? How do you handle it.

  1. #1
    Silver Member Leslie Mary S's Avatar
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    voice? How do you handle it.

    Most likely this has been discussed before but let's give it a wack and see if it goes boom.

    I know that many of us have voices that will never pass, How do you cope with it?

    Oh, the first sentence is mainly to get your attention.
    Leslie Mary Shy
    A Southern Belle.

    "For a lump of coal to become a diamond, it takes a lot of pressure, heat, and time."
    "The question is, can I, as a lump of poor coal, survive that heat, pressure, and time."

  2. #2
    Goddess-In-Training Macey's Avatar
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    Easy to practice feminine manner of speech. Womenfolk *tend* to be more dynamic, where menfolk *tend* to be more monotone. Also, vocabulary that is more descriptive, more adjectives. Yes, these are very broad statements, but a good place to start.

    Pitch can be raised, but it takes practice and muscle control! While some of us (myself included) may never sound 'passable', we can sound more 'blendable'. Those of us with singing experience do have an advantage, the same sort of muscular control that you gain when learning to sing can be applied, but it takes time and a lot of practicing!

    I have a long way to go and am lazy at practicing I've found that one of my challenges is that when practicing the muscle placement in my throat, my face tends to tense up. For now, I have to make a conscious effort to keep it relaxed while practicing, but that builds muscle memory, and the muscle memory starts to take over in time.

    It's as much of a physical skill as it is a mental one.

  3. #3
    Platinum Member Teresa's Avatar
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    Leslie,
    Simple answer is I don't !

    It comes back to the passing question in some repects , there are too many small tell tales and the voice is only one of them . I feel it's better to stop going out thinking yourself as a woman and think of yourself as Leslie or in my case Teresa . I may look like a woman but don't quite sound like one but it isn't a problem to anyone .

    Besides it's impossible to keep the voice going for any length of time , ther odd word yes but when I stood and talked about my TG situation with the NHS I spoke to a full lecture theatre for ten minutes or so , no way could I have done that comfortably without using my normal voice .

    If you get the voice too wrong it's more obvious and you're more likely to make a fool of yourseslf . I will add very few if any change their voices in my social groups .
    The real me ,no going back.

  4. #4
    Aspiring Member Maid_Marion's Avatar
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    I pass. I can get into a long explanation on the phone that takes half an hour and at the end, I'll get the "thanks ma'am" at the end.

  5. #5
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    Short answer, I don't worry about it and just talk.

    I may be more flowery in my choice of words and use different descriptive adjectives but I do nothing with how my voice sounds.

  6. #6
    Platinum Member Beverley Sims's Avatar
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    I just soften my voice a little, doesn't pass but I seem to get away with it.
    Work on your elegance,
    and beauty will follow.

  7. #7
    Silver Member Leslie Mary S's Avatar
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    I don't have that deep bass barrel rolling voice. I have that Drill Instructor voice that automatically projects across a parade field. And has a slight tinny buzz to it too. I try to lower the volume but as I talk, up comes the volume. I do try to keep a low voice, I do truly. I was raised on military bases/posts. I know some of you have heard the voice I am talking about - feed with the diaphragm muscles. I have been heard a half of a mile away even when I wasn't trying. I might have turned it down a bit with old age creeping up on me like the leading edge of a storm.
    Leslie Mary Shy
    A Southern Belle.

    "For a lump of coal to become a diamond, it takes a lot of pressure, heat, and time."
    "The question is, can I, as a lump of poor coal, survive that heat, pressure, and time."

  8. #8
    Twisted Sister Patience's Avatar
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    I'm not trying to pass a a woman (even though I’m gorgeous), so I just try to sound as natural as I can. I am working on it, though, so it’s like a work in progress.
    ...and though she feels as if she is in a play, she is anyway...

  9. #9
    Girliegirl Jillian Faith's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Macey View Post
    Easy to practice feminine manner of speech. Womenfolk *tend* to be more dynamic, where menfolk *tend* to be more monotone. Also, vocabulary that is more descriptive, more adjectives. Yes, these are very broad statements, but a good place to start.

    Pitch can be raised, but it takes practice and muscle control! While some of us (myself included) may never sound 'passable', we can sound more 'blendable'. Those of us with singing experience do have an advantage, the same sort of muscular control that you gain when learning to sing can be applied, but it takes time and a lot of practicing!

    I have a long way to go and am lazy at practicing I've found that one of my challenges is that when practicing the muscle placement in my throat, my face tends to tense up. For now, I have to make a conscious effort to keep it relaxed while practicing, but that builds muscle memory, and the muscle memory starts to take over in time.

    It's as much of a physical skill as it is a mental one.
    Macey I've never heard the term "blendable" feminine voice but I coudn't agree more. I raise the pitch but I still have a deep voice for a women, think Laure Bacall or Angelina Jolie. I'd say my Jill voice works/blends while out enfemme given the visual clues (hair makeup jewelry etc.), my success with no visual clues like on the phone is much lower.

    Jill
    Jill

    https://www.flickr.com/photos/42699780@N07/

  10. #10
    Senior Member NancySue's Avatar
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    So far, no problems. If asked a question, I just nod my head, smile and say “thank you”, in a softer tone, which I’ve practiced. It’s fun to see the occasional look on a SA’s face...is she/he ?

  11. #11
    Senior Member BrendaPDX's Avatar
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    I try to raise my pitch, takes a lot of practice, you can down load an app for your phone. Other than that try high talking (just a bit) in a softer tone and lower volume. Not that I really know being a closet case.

  12. #12
    Silver Member Leslie Mary S's Avatar
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    Lowering the volume tones down the Bass line in any multi-toned voice.
    Humor story: While working in the military we had some comm equipment designed by men, for the male pitch/tone spectrum. When some of the new young female officers tried to talk over it, the system trashed their higher octaves so much that they had to try to talk in a deeper voice or have a male subordinate repeat what they had to say. Nothing over 3 k.hurtz was passed. That was back in the 60s.
    Last edited by Leslie Mary S; 01-24-2019 at 09:23 AM.
    Leslie Mary Shy
    A Southern Belle.

    "For a lump of coal to become a diamond, it takes a lot of pressure, heat, and time."
    "The question is, can I, as a lump of poor coal, survive that heat, pressure, and time."

  13. #13
    Gold Member Helen_Highwater's Avatar
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    Leslie Mary,

    I've told this tale before but it's always worth repeating for those new here.

    At a social group one of the CD'ers was there with his SO who turned out to be a voice therapist. We got chatting and she said the worst mistake CD'ers make is to try to talk too high, almost falsetto as if a BeeGee. Her advice was to raise your pitch very slightly. Starting at your normal pitch sing Do, Ri, Mi, Fa and that should be as far as you need to go. Ri is probably better.

    It's not that difficult to maintain, and coupled with altering what and how you phrase things as Macey points out

    Quote Originally Posted by Macey View Post
    Easy to practice feminine manner of speech. Womenfolk *tend* to be more dynamic, where menfolk *tend* to be more monotone. Also, vocabulary that is more descriptive, more adjectives. Yes, these are very broad statements, but a good place to start.
    The main thing I do is soften how I speak. Get as far away from the parade ground as possible. No shouty man and I feel just as important, make eye contact. GG's engage with each other. Observe a GG talking to an SA. They have a mini conversation. No stoney silence. It might be about the colour of the item you're buying or "That's a good price for these". So engaging regardless of voice is just as important in creating a good impression of who you are. It's not sufficient to look like a female, you need to behave as one to.
    Who dares wears Get in, get out without being noticed

  14. #14
    Senior Member Jean 103's Avatar
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    Like others I just soften my voice a bit.

    It's the one thing I don't really change much.

    At first I tried a few things like singing while driving.

    A few times I caught myself talking in my softer voice at work, also walking on my tip toe's, as I'm use to walking in heels.

    Now I've been going back and forth everyday for so long it's second nature.

  15. #15
    Member Diane Taylor's Avatar
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    I've always spoken to people in my normal voice. LIke it or not, there are VERY FEW male CD'ers that can make their voice sound truly feminine. Close maybe, but not exactly as a female sounds. I don't have a low bass or baritone voice but it still gives me away whenever I'm out but I don't mind at all.

  16. #16
    Yeah Ok like whatever Tracii G's Avatar
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    Just use a softer version of my male voice.
    Head Executive Chief of the Dept of Redundancy Dept.
    Expert plumpologist

  17. #17
    Mannequiniste ! Stacy Darling's Avatar
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    How do you handle it?

    "YOU CAN'T HANDLE THE TRUTH!"

    Just being me Leslie! I hang out with 20yrold gender non specific guys/girls, then the older generation!

    We seem not to worry about the tone or texture of our voice anymore!

  18. #18
    Senior Member Jaymees22's Avatar
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    I try to talk a little softer. I recorded my voice and thought I sounded like Mr. Rogers, so close enough for me.
    I also notice when dressed my mannerisms just naturally seem more feminine.
    I enjoy being a boy, being a GIRL like me!!!

  19. #19
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    Try speaking with your tongue touching the roof of your mouth. Use less volume and keep your voice more in the upper throat. Do not try to raise the pitch of your voice such that it sounds fake. Another item is cadance; a female voice is more flowing.
    Love, Sabrina

  20. #20
    New Member adelinapa's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Jaymees22 View Post
    I try to talk a little softer. I recorded my voice and thought I sounded like Mr. Rogers, so close enough for me.
    I also notice when dressed my mannerisms just naturally seem more feminine.
    This right here. My mannerism goes feminine too, and my voice tends to slow down a little and grows softer by itself. So, same end result just different means of getting there.

  21. #21
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    Plenty of voice training videos on youtube. As always, practice practice practice.

  22. #22
    Platinum Blonde member Ressie's Avatar
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    I don't worry about it and I don't intentionally change my voice at all really. Except my natural speaking voice is pretty much in the bass range. So rather than trying to raise the pitch of my voice, I try not to let my voice get too low. Sometimes it does but it's not a big deal because I'm not trying to pass to that extent.

    Sometimes I feel girly, like there's a happy girl inside. When I feel like that I naturally speak with a more fem voice. It's like the voice I use when I talk to my dog sometimes. Yeah, I'm kind of weird!
    "You're the only one to see the changes you take yourself through", Stevie Wonder

  23. #23
    Reality Check Krisi's Avatar
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    There are some women with a low pitched voice yet you know they are women even if you can't see them. To start with, women typically speak faster than men and use far more words than a man would to convey the same thought. They have different inflections as well. Learning to speak like a woman is something that would take years of constant practice and is probably not practical for the average crossdresser. I try not to put myself in a position where I have to say more than "good morning" or "thank you".
    Krisi

  24. #24
    mini kilted chick t-girlxsophie's Avatar
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    Not really that bothered about my voice,it is what it is I'm not going to fool anyone so why try putting on a voice that would probably end up being a laughable Monty Python type attempt.The only slight difference is that I perhaps talk a little quieter,there's no typical female voice indeed have heard some female voices that are pretty deep

    Sophie
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  25. #25
    Member April Rose's Avatar
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    Wif my pongue pouching va woof of my mouf??
    I am a vessel of the goddess. Let me express my calling to a feminine life through nurturing love and relatedness.

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