I was reading a thread about minor incidents and saw a few remarks about being tall.
Well, I'm not exactly tall. I'm 5-10 ( in the morning and 5-9 in the evening!), but I am definitely on the tall side.
My sometimes Girlfriend, and other times BFF is a a GG named Carole. Carole is 6-2 and blond. We have the same cup size but different band sizes ( 40 vs 42). We're close enough that we wear a lot of the same sizes.
One day I come home and the alley is blocked, but it's like 2:30am and I thought "what the heck" and I parked in front of my house and got out and walked into my home. The next day the neighbor across the street came over and struck up a conversation while I was gardening and mentioned that she had seen me "in a dress" last night.
Well....most places that is not a big deal. But I go through a lot of trouble to keep my lives separate in my neighborhood. Mostly for my Mothers and my out of town Childrens sake.
I said to her "Oh, that's Carole". She replied "Is that what you call yourself when dressed as a woman?" At this point I seriously thought about fessing up, because she was so nice about it. Knowing human nature and the inability of the human race to keep a secret, I decided to double down and I told her that Carole was my, at the time, gf and I could get her over to meet her if she wanted. She THOUGHT she was calling my bluff and said "I'd LOVE to meet her".
Twenty minutes later Carole pulls up and gets out of her car and my neighbor ( lets call her Bonnie) looks at Carole and looks at me and goes back and forth and gets a suspicious look in her eye and says "The woman I saw last night was a redhead". Carole laughs and pulls my spare wig out of her handbag and says "I was a redhead last night". Bonnie stares at both of us for a long minute with a befuddled expression and looks at Carole ( who is all woman from the neck down,but does have kinda manly face) and says" I don't mean to be mean or anything but I think you're a man". Carole, without missing a beat, pulls her tit out of her blouse grabs Bonnies hand and places it up against her breast; saying "these real enough for ya?".
We decided to have fun with Bonnie and for a week when we came home one of us would get out in back of the house and the other would drive up to the front. We both were blondes that week, and when the one who came in from the front got in the house we would swap dresses and then other would go "back out" like we had forgotten something in the car!
At the end of the week, Bonnie comes over and apologizes and starts to leave, getting to the end of the porch she turns around and says "I don't know why I'm apologizing. There is nothing wrong with you wanting to be a woman. I think we would be great friends" and leaves.
Another Carole story.
One day we go out to a club in Columbus Ohio, that a lot of people in the "alt" community frequent. We start to walk in when a man opens the door and says "Hope you don't mind. Im just old fashioned and at least one of you is a lady". Carole started laughing and the man, who was probably gay, says to Carole "Honey with the right make up you could almost pass as a woman. you just need to practice more. You have everything else down just fine".
I couldn't stop laughing, and Carole grabs my arm and takes me to the table. Tears and mascara running down my face. The waitress comes over to get our order and Carole ask her "One of us is a man, who is it?". Without missing a beat the woman puts her hand on Carole's shoulder and smiles and says " You're doing fine, but you need to let your hair grow ( it was barely collar length) and really need to work on your makeup. You know what, for Halloween if you wear a harem girl outfit with a veil you would be sure to pass! Your body is really smoking and your forms are all fitting really great!".
At this point I'm trying desperately to stop laughing but I just can't stop and my sides are hurting and my muscles are spasaming. Carole takes her hair brush out and says to me "Michelle if you don't stop laughing I'm going to give you the spanking of your life"
At which point the lesbian couple next to us say "Sir you know you can't do a scene out here on the floor, your going to have to take your girlfriend to a private room to do that"....and I lost it. Whatever control I had started to regain was completely out the window...but not enough to keep me from slipping off my heels and RUNNING for the car. Because i knew she was serious.....
Don't get me wrong. I'm no beauty. I'm at best rather plain. And when I don't apply enough effort or have been in drab too long( and my mannerisms are still in boy mode) I get read all the time. Oth, when I put in the effort and I'm firmly in the zone, I do tend to pass as everyone's favorite unmarried auntie....
And the last one.
The town I live in produces more tall woman than the general population, as well as producing more girl babies than boy babies ( roughly 82 males for every 100 female births). There have even been a couple of minor papers written about it because it is so unusual. Including the great number of lesbians..both full and part time ( part time being a woman who swears she is a lesbian till she meets a man then...I duno, becomes a Baptist and swears she was never a lesbian. Seen it way more than once); as well as very loose sexual mores. On my block alone there are six single woman who are homeowners...
Anyway...Carole and I went with a bunch of our GG friends to a club for ladies night. Most of them are pretty normal sized but counting Carole and myself there were five women over 5-9; without heels. I get to the door first and the bouncer says " No charge tonight for ladies". I smile to myself and think "how can he NOT tell" because I'm not feeling very girlie, I had been rushed into changing and I really felt like a "man in a dress" . The other ladies get in and Carole is last and the bouncer ask her for the cover charge and Carole replies "I'm a girl silly". Well the bouncer begs to differ and Carole pulls out her ID and hands it to the bouncer. He pronounces it a fake and threatens to have her arrested for producing a fake ID. The arguments get really heated till a Police officer wanders in and takes a look at Carole's ID. Where upon he says "Yep, it's real".
Don't get me wrong, I' get read often enough. And Carole doesn't have problems 99 percent of the time. Yet over the course of many years she has been tagged as a man a couple of dozen times.
All because she is too tall. See girls it happens to GG's too! Lol..though it really helps if you have a face like Dean Martins!
