They may admire how you look but most will not speak to another.
They may admire how you look but most will not speak to another.
Work on your elegance,
and beauty will follow.
I'm confused. Why would she even care that some stranger is dressed better than someone else she doesn't know?Originally Posted by deebra
Tracy ,
I'm just going to back up Deebra's point after your comment . Some people do notice and comment .
I've just remembered a situation when I was looking for sequined tops in the Klass shop . The SA lined up about 12 different ones and then I noticed she had hung a sequined dress on the rail ( the one in my avatar ) . I joked about having so many tops to try on and then I asked why she wanted me to try on the dress , OK this is her honest answer and no BS , she said , " It's a pleasure to see nice clothes tried on by someone with a lovely figure !" Naturally I laughed it off , I thought she was joking but she insisted she wasn't . she then added , " We have so many women with figures that just don't suit the dresses , then you walk in , darn it I wish I had your figure !"
I still can't convince myself I pass , I'm at a loss what to say when I'm faced with a situation like this , I guess it's just what others see in us .
Last edited by Teresa; 04-11-2019 at 02:50 PM.
Teresa,
Are you suggesting that the SA harbors some sort of jealousy (against you?) because an article of clothing fits you better than it does a different customer? Weird...
Look at it this way, imagine yourself at the mall observing the clothing people are wearing. Some stranger walking past is dressed nicely. The next person, not so much. What, exactly, are you jealous of?
Tracy,
She was making a comment because it actually gave her pleasure serving someone that the clothes fitted perfectly , I also repeated her exact words , it's not the first time a GG has said that to me but it's meant in a complimentary way . They are all lovely SAs in that shop , one even let me use her staff discount card , if fact I've bought a gift token for my daughter so I can take her to meet them all .
I don't understand where you are getting the jealous angle from , I never mentioned being envious of other peolple in fact I thought the SA was joking with me .
Teresa some people need to feed their ego and they love the idea of someone being jealous of them.
Kind of like the kid on the block that gets a shiny new bicycle and rubs it in that yours is old and scratched up.
This reads like the cross-dresser version of Samantha Brick.
We aren’t living in an old sit-com. Women, barring a few with mental health issues, don’t get wildly jealous of attractive women they see in shopping malls.They are certainly not going to be jealous of a man presenting as a man, however he is dressed - very few women want to look like men. Many women may think the presence of a man dressed in extreme camp is a nice sign of diversity in the neighbourhood, but few will consider it in terms of sexual attractiveness. Also if someone thinks the majority of people around them look terrible it only suggests that the majority of people disagree with them on matters of taste.
Deebra, I get that this fantasy of women being jealous of you is likely to be an actual sexual fantasy, and that you are well aware it is complete piffle. However if I’m wrong, and you really are concerned about women being thrown into despair by your incredible beauty and sharp style, maybe share your previously posted theory about women having short pockets with them. The one where we don’t need pockets because we all use sex to manipulate men out of their money. It’s almost impossible to be really jealous of someone you think is a complete pillock.
Last edited by MoGG; 04-11-2019 at 04:44 PM.
Teresa,
I could have sworn Deebra asked a question about women and jealousy in the last sentence of the very first post in this thread. I thought that was what we were discussing. Maybe I read it wrong. My bad.
I don't think you are wrong, I had the same vibe from the OP's post.
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Tracy,
In that case I read it wrong or misunderstood your reply as to which comment you were referring to .
Having read the original thread again I see your point , I hate to say it but I have to say maybe MogGG is right with some of her comments .
OK I look partially guity of the point she's making but Deebra is asking and making assumptions and I've just passed on what was honetly said to me , OK I am presenting fully dressed as Teresa not a MIAD .
Last edited by Teresa; 04-13-2019 at 08:19 AM.
OK! They're people out there with weight problems, with money problems and can't afford to dress up. They're some that maybe in a point in their life they just don't fell good about them self or just don't care. Whatever! But our little pristine selves are asking these same human beings to except our all too pretty little selves after we trash talk them to death and act like they're less than. I'm only going what I have read here and in all many other threads and has been cast into the universe for all to see! So really don't see any good reason for our community to be crying foul.
Interesting. Good luck with that.
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@Teresa - what I said isn’t directed at you, it’s more at the idea that women react negatively to someone being attractive, which is which is what deebra seems to be hoping for. Honestly she could have the legs of Elle McPherson in her prime, and I still don’t think many women would be actually jealous because most people just want to look like an optimised version of themselves, not like someone else. I know this might be different for some cross-dressers as a few on here suggest they would like to look like people they are sexually attracted to. In any case, women often genuinely describe other people as beautiful, including behind their backs, without wishing them ill or wanting to look like them.
Of course sometimes women say “I’m jealous” as a self-depreciating compliment, but it’s not something someone would say if they actually were jealous, even though the admiration is sincere.
Last edited by MoGG; 04-12-2019 at 08:44 AM.
I don't think women are jealous but they do notice how you dress. I attend church as Nikki and almost always wear a dress or a skirt. I've been complemented on some outfits and as the women have come to know me I have had some tell me that seeing me in a dress or skirt made them remember how nice it is to dress up again. I see a few more wearing dresses and skirts again. Don't get me wrong, on my best day l can't compete with the other women, but I try to look nice and respectable and I think I do a nice job. I know we talk about photos. I am not a picture taker. I don't like how the pictures turn out and anything posted is out there. I want to choose when and to whom I reveal myself.
MoGG,
Not at all , I didn't think that, no problem .
As a GG maybe you could answer this question , it continues about you comments on what GGs think of other women . I personally have found what you say is perfectly true but the one area most women do appear to comment on is the shape of legs , they very rarely if ever comment on other parts of the body but they do appear to love to see and comment on legs . I don't mean just about Cders but that aspect is the one thing I've had compliments about . That goes for my daughter right through to SAs .
I think women are assuming cross-dressers want to look like a woman, and so are identifying the area where cross dressers tend to be the most successful by that criteria, and genuinely complementing them on having legs that look close to a conventional female ideal, ie lean, no cellulite, slender thighs. . “I’m jealous” is just a figure of speech, its hyperbole. Many women would like to be skinnier, have no cellulite, etc, but they don’t want someone else’s legs, they want the best possible version of their own, and they won’t feel any hostility to people for having nice legs
Having said that, I am truly wildly jealous of the amount of time my husband spends on grooming his legs. Now we have a small kid I feel lucky if I get to shave or wash my hair once a week, and yet he manages to keep his legs like polished marble. So there could be similar elements in play.
Last edited by MoGG; 04-13-2019 at 04:21 PM.
MoGG,
Thanks for that , My comment was also about a woman passing comments of other womens legs . I've heard my wife on more than one occasion bring it up in conversations when she been on the phone to a friend .
Maybe I could repeat a story to make my point . I was in as large out of town store , they have bus trips for shoppers and I happened to be in a middle of a group , the converstaion was amusing . One or two started looking at my choices and telling me how good it should look , I was doing the same to them , on one occasion I pulled out a lovely dress saying to the lady next to me how nice it was, she said it was beautiful but you're OK with your height and those legs I don't stand a chance at 4' 11" . While I'm not going to get caught up on the passing question I felt those ladies were not thinking of me in crossdressing terms .
By the way I feel you should get your partner to speed up , I shave all over everyday and it only takes me twenty minutes
Last edited by Teresa; 04-14-2019 at 09:27 AM.
Teresa, I am so glad you have such a nice female figure, dress nice to show it and don't waste it being a man. You inspire us all for being the attractive CD/TG you are.
Let me start with the fact that when I’m out no one thinks I’m cis, certainly no one that I talk to, which is just about anyone that will listen. Now, I understand that many CDs and trans women are very much interested in being stealth. So, I am a bit cautious about approaching people, especially since I am not at all stealth. The bottom line is that I leave it up to the other person. If they make eye contact and give an inviting smile, then I will certainly make an effort to start a conversation.
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Interesting cause it kind of happened to me. I was shopping en drab in Austin TX at a place called Bazaar. A great store by the way. I was looking at a dress when i heard a voice behind me say "That will look great on you..." I was mortified. I was sure I was discovered.
He was very quick to tell me that he was a performer at a local drag club. After calming me down, we went out for coffee. Well, long story short, we became friends. He introduced me to the very active drag community in Austin and became my drag mom. While i didn't perform in drag, the mentorship did encourage me to begin going out en femme. The rest, as they say, is history.
Sabrina that was a great meet up, look how it changed your CD life for the better. Just use a little class and brains if you want to speak to another CD.
This thread seems so absurd but I'm bored so why not reply. There are multiple threads talking about how women have paid them compliments and how they are "jealous". As MoGG pointed out, they are passing compliments and people need to quit dwelling on them. The women are just being nice and making small talk. Do you take it to heart every time someone says "It's always so good to see you!" ? By this logic, you should assume you are the most interesting/attractive/friendliest person in the world. Surely that must be the case because multiple people have said it to you and they stress the word always! This is the ridiculous logic that some members keep circling back around to. I don't know why MoGG even needed to explain this because it should have be completely obvious.
I would say that literally 70% of the time I have a hair appointment (cut, blowout, whatever) the stylists gushes over my hair. It's the stereotypical thick, glossy Asian hair and I do think they admire it. However, there are so many girls (especially in San Francisco) that have hair this nice and I do not believe for one second they are actually jealous. One of my friends is this hot Brazilian girl and she is always playing with my hair and telling me how she wants it. I don't take it that serious because I am sure she notices all the guys drooling around her because I certainly notice them doing that. It's absurd to think she actually spends anytime thinking how much she really wants hair like mine instead of her naturally curly Brazilian hair.
When I meet someone talented such as a singer, dancer, artist, chef, etc. I definitely admire their talent but I am not jealous that they possess something I do not. The world is not filled with these insecure, jealous woman that are staring longingly at traits you possess. Take the "jealous" comments as just a polite hello and quit rehashing the same stories about how woman have told you they wish they looked as good as you. It's delusional.
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