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Thread: I almost caused an accident today.

  1. #1
    Senior Member Jean 103's Avatar
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    I almost caused an accident today.

    My landlord and I have just come out of HD garden center. We are in the parking lot standing behind my car. Well I’m standing, my friend, she is sitting on one of those power chairs facing the store.

    Now it’s 4PM on a sunny day about 70 degrees with a cool breeze. So I was wearing bleached out skin tight Skinny jeans with a turned up cuff, a cute sleeveless blouse, and white heels.

    I’m bent over putting this rose bush in the trunk of my car, trying not to brake any of the branches. My friend starts giggling, she tells me this guy just walked across the parking lot completely fixated on my behind. He walked into a curb and almost fell on his behind.

    The rose made it without damage and we’ll be planting it tomorrow.

  2. #2
    Aspiring Member abbiedrake's Avatar
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    Does that make the butt of this joke your rear end or him? 😁
    And was the rose undamaged?!

  3. #3
    🙊🙈🙉 Patience's Avatar
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    Jean, you ignorant s1ut! Stop inflaming the menfolk with your womanly attributes!

    (Hope everyone gets the SNL reference...)
    When haters hate, I celebrate!

  4. #4
    Goddess-In-Training Macey's Avatar
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    And you weren't even 'working it'! Imagine the havoc you could cause if you did!

  5. #5
    Silver Member Bobbi46's Avatar
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    Butt what happened later?
    I started life a lost man now I am a found woman

  6. #6
    Platinum Member Crissy 107's Avatar
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    Butt what is going to happen if you go back to HD?
    Crissy

  7. #7
    Goddess-In-Training Macey's Avatar
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    Butt how many other men did you distract in your travels?

  8. #8
    Aspiring Member abbiedrake's Avatar
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    Are you sure he didn't trip cause of a crack in the sidewalk, rather than your crack?

    [SIZE=1]- - - Updated - - -[/SIZE]

    Bummer for him!

    [SIZE=1]- - - Updated - - -[/SIZE]

    Your ass made him make an ass out of his ass.

    [SIZE=1]- - - Updated - - -[/SIZE]

    'What an ass!' said both of you.

  9. #9
    Member Chloe St Clair's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Jean 103 View Post
    . . . I’m bent over putting this rose bush in the trunk of my car, trying not to brake any of the branches. My friend starts giggling, she tells me this guy just walked across the parking lot completely fixated on my behind. He walked into a curb and almost fell on his behind. . . .
    Too Funny! I can absolutely picture that scene in my mind. I love it!
    My Flickr page is at https://www.flickr.com/photos/156828173@N07/

  10. #10
    Aspiring Member abbiedrake's Avatar
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    He didn't trip. He was rear-ended.

  11. #11
    Silver Member Bobbi46's Avatar
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    Now we are really getting to the bottom of this story! I like the cheek of it all so much so I just "cracked up " laughing?
    I started life a lost man now I am a found woman

  12. #12
    Aspiring Member abbiedrake's Avatar
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    He hadn't expected to see a full moon in the middle of the day.

    [SIZE=1]- - - Updated - - -[/SIZE]

    Jean, you do know we're gonna call you Aunt Fanny from now on, right?

    [SIZE=1]- - - Updated - - -[/SIZE]

    In a great rush
    She dealt with the bush
    He looked at her tush
    Developed a crush
    And with narry a push
    He fell with a blush
    Nearly smacking his mush.

  13. #13
    Goddess-In-Training Macey's Avatar
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    Next time this happens hum 'danny boy'. Without the lyrics, the tune is known as 'derry air. :P

  14. #14
    Aspiring Member abbiedrake's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Macey View Post
    Next time this happens hum 'danny boy'. Without the lyrics, the tune is known as 'derry air. :P
    👍
    'I'm Abbie Drake and I approve this message.'

  15. #15
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    Quote Originally Posted by Jean 103 View Post
    He walked into a curb and almost fell on his behind.
    That is one of the best compliments a girl can get! That means you got it goin' on girl!
    Last edited by Robertacd; 05-12-2019 at 11:52 AM.

  16. #16
    Senior Member Jean 103's Avatar
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    Thank you all so much.

    I do have to take my butt over there in a bit in the truck, for some soil amendments.

    And after that I will be digging up and replacing a rose out front. It is the wrong color so I am moving it to the backyard.
    Oh well we are burning daylight, so I guess I’ll get out of this nightgown, slide my butt into something and get this day started.

  17. #17
    Platinum Member alwayshave's Avatar
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    Jean, that's a funny story.
    Please call me Jamie, I always_have crossdressed, I always will, "alwayshave".

  18. #18
    Resident Polymath MarinaTwelve200's Avatar
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    If only he knew

  19. #19
    Lady By Choice Leslie Langford's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Patience View Post
    Jean, you ignorant s1ut! Stop inflaming the menfolk with your womanly attributes!

    (Hope everyone gets the SNL reference...)
    Yes, and if they become unruly, just gift them with a "Bag O' Glass" glass shards from Mainway Toys, courtesy of Irwin Mainway a.k.a Dan Aykroyd

  20. #20
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    Quote Originally Posted by Jean 103 View Post
    My friend starts giggling, she tells me this guy just walked across the parking lot completely fixated on my behind. He walked into a curb and almost fell on his behind.
    That is so funny, and could only happen in real life. Truth is stranger than fiction because you have to get fiction past an editor.

  21. #21
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    Hi Jean , As I walk through Home Depot I just wonder how many of the MACHO guys are also underdressed too.

    >>>>>>>>>>>>Orchid ..OO..
    Having my ears triple pierced is AWESOME, ~~......

    I can explain it to you, But I can't comprehend it for you !

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  22. #22
    Platinum Member Beverley Sims's Avatar
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    At least the accident didn't happen to you. :-)
    Work on your elegance,
    and beauty will follow.

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