Good idea Jennifer. If that doesn't work I don't know what willOriginally Posted by JenniferR771
Good idea Jennifer. If that doesn't work I don't know what will
"You're the only one to see the changes you take yourself through", Stevie Wonder
Thanks for all your advice and experiences - It was refreshing in some ways and sad in other's to read all your replies
I have pretty much accepted now - that if I continue to dress up (which is 99.9% likely....lol) I am not going to be in what I would call a loving , normal relationship with a straight lady
I may have to try to hide it and hope that in the future , I do , actually , meet a woman who could possibly accept it
Failing that , maybe , I could say , I only want to wear Pantyhose/Stockings/Nylon and hope that works instead !
I don't believe all hope is lost.
While the deck may be stacked against you, that's not to say that you're destined to be alone for the rest of your life, either.
It is certainly possible to find a GG who *is* cool with it all, or at least to some degree.
But it's not entirely on her, of course. How the CD'ing plays a role in your life is also a factor.
For example, if you have this frequent need to get completely dolled-up (and I'm talking like *everything*) & head out into the world on a regular basis? Your chances will probably go way down.
However... If you're genuinely content with omitting a lot of things in a certain vein, it may not be so bad.
Do you *truly* need the make-up? The wig? The fake boobs & hips? The fake nails? The perfume? All that kind of stuff?
Or, are you able to incorporate the dressing, perhaps as GG's do with men's clothes? (And yes, despite what some may claim, that happens quite often with them, especially with the younger crowd.)
If you can "guy-mode" it, and still have it look pretty good/natural? Then you're probably opening up that door that much wider.
Personally, these days I look like I do in my avatar, only once in a blue moon. While I do own a wig & some make-up, very rarely are they worn. And even then, it's nothing else... Just the clothing from the GG-side that I wear in guy-mode. None of the other extra frills mentioned above. And I do keep it behind closed doors these days (the past is a different story).
I don't know how "deep" you go with the CD'ing, but have you tried experimenting with your presentation? For example, if you tend to stick with short femmy dresses, hose & heels, why not mix it up a bit? How about leggings, a hoodie & running shoes, instead? Or, even mix & match from your women's & men's wardrobes? Heck, there are times when I'll simply wear all men's clothes, except for some no-show socks & a pair of GG running shoes with a good amount of hot-pink in them.
Am I presenting as a woman when I do this? Nope. I look like a guy. (Some may say perhaps a bit of a "swishy" one, but whatever.) But the fact remains: I'm looking like a guy, no mistake about that.
And I do believe more GG's may be more receptive to that, relatively speaking. You're basically casting a wider net, than you would if you were going "full out."
Anyway, you mention that you enjoy wearing hose/tights (hopefully with shaved legs?). I know of guys out there who do wear these, in public, at that -- yet everything else is from the men's department. Does it work for them? Yep. They just happen to really like them -- just as some GG's do. So, they wear 'em! Oftentimes with shorts. If that's their thing, then all is good.
Like I said, there's nothing wrong with experimenting with one's presentation. The possibilities are almost endless. It doesn't have to be either full-blown guy, or full-blown female. A GG may be genuinely fine with you wearing women's leggings, for example (even if it's just around the house). A bit out of the ordinary, sure... But perhaps much more acceptable & understandable, than, say, going the whole 9 yards in the full female get-up.
Hope that helps a bit!
There is the line of thought that if your workplace presentation breaks the norm it shows you have the power and confidence to do that. Both elements that attract women.
The guy in the next office said my (women's XS) red/pink pattern shirt looks good on me. Of course it does, it is nicely fitted and just the right size for me.
Last edited by Maid_Marion; 05-26-2019 at 03:12 PM.
Ellbee, you raise a valid point.
For me personally, if i dress, i dress. The whole thing to the max.
I agree that gg's will go for the non cder, and i dont blame them, but i cant do partial dressing.
I am single and if im honest, i dont chase women for the dressing reason, and i think the majority will run a mile.
Its the way it goes.
I personally know several GGs who married CDs with full knowledge of what they were getting into.
I also know several GGs who probably didn't know before getting married, but were very, very accepting after they found out.
My wife is in neither category.
Hi, I'm Steffi and I'm a crossdresser... And I accept and celebrate both sides of me. Or, maybe I'm gender fluid.
I think perhaps the best option to take, would be to introduce the topic gradually, such as by eventually introducing a crossdresser movie, or watching Rupaul's 'Drag race' TV show or something like it. Then mention something along the lines of, 'You know, I USED to crossdress too', and see how she takes that, the key words being 'USED TO', getting you off the hook if it's a completely negative response, you can always backtrack and deny that you do it anymore, and then decide if you wish to keep seeing her and remain in the closet to see if she changes her attitude over time, or if you need to jettison her from your life if she seems completely horrified at the idea. Or maybe somewhere in the middle, she may be okay with it but then say she wouldn't want to pursue anything romantic, but would still be interested in being your friend.
Some causes of crossdressing you've probably never even considered: My TG biography at:http://www.crossdressers.com/forums/...=1#post1490560
There's an addendum at post # 82 on that thread, too. It's about a ten minute read.
Why don't we understand our desire to dress, behave and feel like a girl? Because from childhood, boys are told that the worst possible thing we can be, is a sissy. This feeling is so ingrained into our psyche, that we will suppress any thoughts that connect us to being or wanting to be feminine, even to the point of creating separate personalities to assign those female feelings into.
I told my wife before we married tried to make compromises .Did not work in the end 15 years of marriage down the drain .She told my daughter last summer and my daughter told me she was very cool with it but we did not talk about it.It is still awkward because we have not spoken about this hopefully we can sooner than later
I have a hubcap diamond star halo
I am coming up to 78 y/o and very passable. My wife cannot stand seeing me dressed. I do not see her for months on end as she is away looking after her 90+ year old parents. I normally go out at night, but have wanted to go out during daylight. So I have a female neighbour who is always out and about browsing around charity shops. About 3 months age I went round for coffee (as you do) and said that I would like to come with her on her trips. But I said that I would be coming as a woman. Yes, so, I do not have a problem with that. If any of you are thinking about it and you know someone that you can trust with your secret then go for it. And you will not regret it, especially mixing with other females in the shops.
Julie.
My gf is cool wiht it she steels stuff from me and we gone and had pedicures done together
I found one lol I explained I am a full CD and she accepted me. She's bought me outfits, a bra, thongs and really pretty sandals. She encourages me to be me. Just be up front and I'm sure you'll find someone.
I know a lady who absolutely adores CDs. I've told her on many occasions that she is a unicorn in our world. Were I not already engaged to a truly wonderful woman, I would most certainly date her.
It's spelled Marika, but it's pronounced Janey!
Appreciate the beauty in the current moment, because the past is gone and tomorrow never comes.
Janey's Amost Secret Crossdressing Blog: http://marikajaye.blogspot.com
I know one that is married to a drag queen! She has posted photos!
Don't lose all hope they are in the minority but I am married and have an accepting wife. Granted I was already married before I told her, but I also had a girlfriend in the past that I told while we were dating and she was accepting of it too.
What a coincidence! My wife is married to a drag queen too! :P
My wife accepts my CDing. Even though right away it was uneasy for her. Now she doesn't care. She basically shares makeup, does tutorials together, and goes clothes and makeup shopping with me now. I keep CDing at a time and place for it. Even though she doesn't care now, I still don't wanna overwhelm her in anyway. Kaylin gets her days on certain days of the week. And my Male self gets his days. So it all works out. I agree with the comment of honesty and world class communication is key. Cause it really is!!
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