How do you identify? And can you explain why?

[KimberlyJean]

Hello all,

We are a very diverse group of individuals with varying motivations. I hope we can discuss this without it devolving into a firestorm, my question and hopes for cordial answers is how do you identify and can you explain why you feel that way?

I identify as a woman and FOR ME this explains my why. I was 40 years old when the pieces fell into place and I realized that indeed I am a woman and have always been. I told myself for years that women wouldn't do the things I do and therefore I couldn't be a woman I just had this issue I had to deal with. Then I realized that women do all the things that I do and they do them well. My mother was my role model and the strongest person I have ever known, living up to her character and strength of person is a goal I would be proud of.

I know we have beaten around this bush in several threads but nothing attacked it directly. My curiosity is peaked and I genuinely would like to understand different positions on this. Maybe we can gain a greater understanding of our differences and similarities by discussing this and being honest with each other and ourselves.


(crossing fingers and ducking in case of incoming)

[Samm]

Hi Kimberly Jean! for me, I never thought of myself as a woman. Or being in the wrong body etc. I am male.
But.... on the inside, I can definitely put myself as somewhere in the middle. I don't feel I'm one or the other, but more a little of both. Some days I'm more male, some not so much. I see it as constantly moving, like a seesaw or the waves of an ocean. Sometimes it's difficult to keep up, and I do struggle with it from time to time.

[Lana Mae]

I set out to explore my feminine side! I was still "male" then! Slowly the male turned into Non-binary trangender! Then the GD said need HT! I sat on that for a while and then decided that was the way to go! I am 6 months in HT and still consider myself TG/NB! Where I will go from here is anybody's guess! Enjoying the journey! Gender me! LOL Just my $0.02! Hugs Lana Mae

[Robbin_Sinclair]

Hi Kimberly Jean! for me, I never thought of myself as a woman. Or being in the wrong body etc. I am male.
But.... on the inside, I can definitely put myself as somewhere in the middle. I don't feel I'm one or the other, but more a little of both. Some days I'm more male, some not so much. I see it as constantly moving, like a seesaw or the waves of an ocean. Sometimes it's difficult to keep up, and I do struggle with it from time to time.

Hi ... I think that says it best for me too. When I first joined this site, i had more questions about being a man who struggled to be some sterotype of what was around me. It sort of Chicago/Italian family man but my family were above being part of the neighborhood. This was my concept of what I had to contend with to be successful where I lived.

A lot has passed since the old days but I am always thinking of the manly things I did to fit in. I’d love to shave fully and not have to play a role but I can’t. And that’s okay.

I’ve been a woman many times in life. Not sure when but part of me was always on the bottom for a long period of time. It feels very comfortable to be. It always did.

AND I’ve learned to smile! Thanks CDdotcom. ❤️❤️〰️robbin

PS Thanks for the nice question. Mississippi. Someday I want to go there for the banjo music ... to play and look like Meridith Moon. What a dream. ~by XX

[Linda E. Woodworth]

Good Morning Kimberly Jean,

I hope the weather is nice in Mississippi this time of year. We're having a pleasant few days in the Low Country of SC with mild temperatures and "low" humidity. I used to work in the Middle East and in the worst parts of the summer I often thought that it was hotter "at home" than there.

Anyway, I don't understand why your getting ready to "duck & cover" over your question, but I digress.

I am a transvestite. I am a man who likes to wear woman's clothing and dress fully as a woman. However; I've always known I was a man and don't have any doubts or reservations about that. I knew this as a little boy, just like I knew I wasn't going into the Church either. (Despite my mother's wishes)

Can I give you a list of several concrete reasons or facts about why I know I'm a man. Nope.

Good luck with your question.
Love,
Linda W.

[Nikki A.]

Born Male but always felt a bit different. I do feel there is a woman inside fighting to get out. And over the years I've let this side become more overt and public. Would I transition? Probably not but if i could make some changes to present better I would never say never.

[Georgia_Maine]

Physically male. Mentally and emotionally a little of both. I just consider me: me!

[Tracy Irving]

Most of the time I present as "gender male" so that is the option I will go with, for now...

[Asew]

A simple way to put it for me is "I am not a girl but I like girly things". I identify as non-binary, and love to just be me, and that includes things that are male and/or female, why be limited to one set of options?

[Maid_Marion]

Pragmatically, I still identify as male so I can run into a bathroom and do my business quickly. But, if you call me ma'am as many do, I'm fine with that.

[Jodie_Lynn]

I identify as human. Because, well, when I tell folks I'm a Klingon, I get funny looks...


As to gender identity, I label myself as a heterosexual female.

[franlee]

I am a straight male that enjoys a vivid imagination and indulging myself in my fantasies and desires. So to explain this is simple I learned many years ago I only need to be me and that is who I am no matter what I'm doing or wearing.

[Krea]

I don't know exactly where i fit into the spectrum.
I don't want to transition but neither do i identify with traditional masculine streotypes. I guess these days i think of myself as gender-blurred, or perhaps gender-indifferent. The best i can do is just be the person i wanna be, whatever that is....

[Teresa]

Kimberly,
I understand your hesitation , it's a fair enough question but often turns into a heated debate over labels .

It's unfair to say you start as a crossdresser as if it's something menial but in fact the majority of us started out as CDers . The act of dressing opens our minds and the doors to hopefully find ourselves, then we have the tricky one of defining oursleves . We have to be careful we do it for oursleves and not what someone else thinks we are , that's when counselling can lend a helping hand .

I look back and see it as a stage we need to go through , we need to identify ourselves to find our own acceptance and that of others , without an identity we can't move forward .
Personally the umbrella term transgender covers it for me , it gives me the space to move freely across the spectrum . I feel I've moved into a situation where I don't need to define myself , going out full time doesn't need explaining it's visibly obvious . I'm dressed as a woman , if some think I am one that's great , the ones that don't I can live with as long as they aren't abusive or rude which they aren't . They don't know what anatomy is real and what isn't , I don't need to tell them and so far no one has asked , so how do I indentify ? I just use my name .

[Cheryl T]

I identify as just Me.
This has always been a journey through my life and I haven't reached the final destination so I can't say what the name of that station is.
It began at Curiosity, visited Fascination, spent some time at Sexual Gratification, stayed for years at Ima Crossdresser, continued on to Isit More and now we're refueling at Crossroads.

I see many tracks before me, but still don't know where this train will go. Time will tell ...

[Ressie]

I kind of wanted to be a girl as a teenager 50 years ago. However, I identify as a male since that's primarily what I am biologically. Love to dress up fully once in a while but still don't identify as a female. This whole "identify as" thing is new to me. Guess I'll have to use the men's room when going out. YMMV

[KimberlyJean]

Thanks for the replies, I knew we were a diverse crowd. There are a hundred threads about defining others or terms and I was left thinking about where the heck do I fit in. We all on some level want to belong. I thought it was time we defined ourselves!

Linda, the weather is getting hot and humid. That big storm sucked a lot of the humidity out of the area but it is back now with a vengeance. And the duck and cover is because the forum has been a little hostile lately.

[alwayshave]

KimberlyJean, I love all things female and maybe as a teenager wished was a girl. However, I realize that I am a male and always will be. I love wearing women's close and "always have", and always will. But I am male.

[Michellebej]

I'm a woman. I had to learn to be a boy to make my father and grandfathers happy. I did a pretty good job of it too. I wouldn't say I have a disassociated personality. I do though have two distinct "me's".

[rockerreds]

Trans Female, because I should have been born a girl.

[Confucius]

I see myself as a man and most of the time I am happy being a man. However, I have a great admiration for all things feminine.
When I crossdress, I still see myself as a man in a dress. I wish I could look like a beautiful woman, but I'm afraid that is impossible. That doesn't bother me because for me just wearing feminine clothing seems to release all sorts of feel good neurotransmitters.

I believe that in my youth there might have been a period when I had gender dysphoria. If I had seen a gender therapist at that point in my life then things might have been different.

[DMichele]

I identify as near-female. It feels right and after coming to terms with my identity, I am happier and more confident. I can't change my yesterdays, but I strive to enjoy day-to-day living.

[Michelle1955]

Born in 1955, always wanted to be female. In my head I am female, so 98% female and maybe 2% male. By 1960 switch underwear / panties with a GG my age the panties seemed correct in my mind. Always at a very early age looked and the female, cloths, bras, panties, toys, etc in the JCP / Sears catalog. But in the 1960’s boys wearing girls cloths was nearly a death sentence. Still a mental block to me basically 55+ years later. Do I crossdress daily, but undressing will satisfy most of my needs most of the time. Wearing a bra is my pacifier, an A or B cup is all in need to fight the fog. Do I go out in the real world dressed yes, but only when the fog gets bad. If I was young again I would fully transition in a heart beat, but would identify as a lesbian. The majority of men attitudes are horrible. I been married for 40 years to the same woman, we have similar attitudes since we both grew up the 1960-70’s but we make it work the best we can.

[Jenn_8B]

I really wish I could figure out what I am. Primarily I'm male and that's how I live my life; however, I would consider gender transformation if I could.

[Rachael Leigh]

I know for me I feel as if I’m like the native Americans say a two Spirt person I’ve got both male and female parts with the
female being the dominate. It’s taken time to understand and accept this and still I struggle but I go forward