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Thread: Have a good day...sir!

  1. #26
    Aspiring Member Eemz's Avatar
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    Been there, yep. Nice evening out, go to the counter to pay. "Here's your change. MATE". Slams money on counter.

    I just remap it in my brain to "Here's your change, and btw I am a f-ing a-hole and I know it". OK, good to know. Thanks for that. I wasn't sure, but now you've cleared that up nicely.

  2. #27
    Platinum Blonde member Ressie's Avatar
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    Ressie: Sounds great except the clerks involved were teen to twenty something females! No quite appropriate!
    In that case I might respond: "You boys have fun". But I think you did the noble thing. We are gonna get giggles and misgendered every now and then. We can't control others and it's something we have to expect.
    "You're the only one to see the changes you take yourself through", Stevie Wonder

  3. #28
    Senior Member Tracy Irving's Avatar
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    Well played, Lana Mae.

    I repeatedly hear women being misgendered. Well, almost. Watch any television show or listen to a random conversation on the street and you will hear them being referred to as "guys". It is as if the word has transcended gender and become synonymous with anyone / everyone. Maybe "guys" is being used as a plural for "you"?

    Not the same as "sir" but still bothersome, to me anyway.

  4. #29
    Aspiring Member GracieRose's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Tracy Irving View Post
    "guys". It is as if the word has transcended gender and become synonymous with anyone / everyone. Maybe "guys" is being used as a plural for "you"?

    Not the same as "sir" but still bothersome, to me anyway.
    Guilty as charged. (I'll apologize in advance, Tracy)
    I have often used the term to refer to a group of people, male, female or mixed, without thinking about it. I use it as a non-gender specific reference without thinking of the actual definition.
    Over the years, I have coached girl's soccer teams and I often called out things like "OK guys we're going to do this drill" or "over here , guys" without giving it a second thought. I once realized how it might be interpreted, and I told the girls that I did not mean to infer that they were boys when I called them guys and asked if I had offended anyone. No one said yes, but I suspect that I had offended any of them, they would not have spoken up to the coach. I occasionally referred to them as 'ladies", but that seemed too gender specific and 'guys' sounded more gender neutral to me.
    I see it as the same problem with the gender specific pronouns in the English language (and most other languages). I'd love to use gender neutral pronouns, but most of the attempts to remove gender from pronouns sounds awkward to me. I will probably continue to use "guys" until I hear a better alternative. I'd welcome a better alternative.
    -peace
    -Gracie

  5. #30
    Aspiring Member abbiedrake's Avatar
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    I've checked. Most dictionaries definitions indicate 'guys' to be non-gender specific.
    So you're fine, Gracie

  6. #31
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    Hi Lana Mae , You just can't fix Stupid !! >Orchid .oOOo.
    Having my ears triple pierced is AWESOME, ~~......

    I can explain it to you, But I can't comprehend it for you !

    If at first you don't succeed, Then Skydiving isn't for you.

    Be careful what you wish for, Once you ring a bell , you just can't Un-Ring it !! !!

  7. #32
    Aspiring Member Karmen's Avatar
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    I know how you feel. It happened to me too when I went out in public fully dressed and past strangers or interacted with people. I have strong male facial features and wide shoulders and even make up and clothes can't hide that. I was also addressed as men a few times and some people occasionally laughed at me and finger pointed. Usually drunk people, because I go out fully dressed mostly at night. It was embarrassing, but I lived through.

  8. #33
    Gold Member Lana Mae's Avatar
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    Mykell: I am one of those that thinks of all that after the fact!
    Eemz: Well, she sure proved it!
    Ressie: Yes, I have resigned my self to that fact but won't let it stop me or get me down-I consider the source! And...since there really isn't one of importance ignore it!
    Tracy: Guy/guys gets used with both genders! Since I was a little kid I remember it being used for both!
    Gracie: I am not a linguist and have nothing to offer as an alternative! Sorry!
    Abbie: Thanks for that!
    Orchid: You are right!
    Karmen: Not sure how your country is with LGBTQ issues but I am proud of you getting out there! Be careful!
    Thanks ladies for your responses!
    Hugs Lana Mae
    Life is worth living!
    "Foxy lady! You look so good!!" Jimi Hendrix

  9. #34
    Aspiring Member Karmen's Avatar
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    Thanks! It's not dangerous or anything like that, but most of the people still don't consider crossdressing normal behaviour and some of them openly making fun of you when they see you.

  10. #35
    its important mykell's Avatar
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    Mykell: I am one of those that thinks of all that after the fact!
    lana we have that in common then, i just thought of that this year, the incident occurred two years ago, talk about slow with witty retorts
    ....Mykell
    i dressed like a girl and i liked it! crossdressing...theirs an app for that

  11. #36
    Female Illusionist! docrobbysherry's Avatar
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    If it didn't bother u, why did u mention it, Lana Mae?

    I have a mirror, I'm a man in a dress to most people. As long as folks r polite and helpful? I take every, "Have a good day, sir", in the spirit in which it's given!
    U can't keep doing the same things over and over and expect to enjoy life to the max. When u try new things, even if they r out of your comfort zone, u may experience new excitement and growth that u never expected.

    Challenge yourself and pursue your passions! When your life clock runs out, you'll have few or NO REGRETS!

  12. #37
    Aspiring Member abbiedrake's Avatar
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    Hey Lana thanks for being so conscientious in replying. I much prefer it when threads have back and forth conversation rather than 30 people giving their opinion on the OP and not giving a hoot/replying to any other people's posts.
    Say hi to your lovely wife for us.

  13. #38
    Curmudgeon Member donnalee's Avatar
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    A good response depends on the gender of the offending party. To a woman, say "Thank you, Sir!"; to a man "Thank you Ma'am!". If they're going to missgender you, certainly they deserve the same treatment.
    ALWAYS plan for the worst, then you can be pleasantly surprised if something else happens!

    "The important thing about the bear is not how well she dances, but that she dances at all." - Old Russian Proverb (with a gender change)

  14. #39
    Gold Member Lana Mae's Avatar
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    Karmen: Generally it is safe to go out in the daytime or to a safe venue at night with others!
    Mykell: Yeah, I have always been that way! I think of great come backs but like the next day!
    Sherry: It did not bother me, I was just relating that it was really nothing and possibly encouraging others to get out there!
    Abbie: Yes, I enjoy the back and forth in some threads as well! Abbie, my wife is with Jesus now for 3 years!
    Donnalee: That thought crossed my mind, later that night! Always slow to think of retorts! LOL
    Thanks ladies for your responses!
    Hugs Lana Mae
    Last edited by char GG; 06-02-2019 at 04:10 PM. Reason: sending pm
    Life is worth living!
    "Foxy lady! You look so good!!" Jimi Hendrix

  15. #40
    Aspiring Member abbiedrake's Avatar
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    Sowwy! My bad.

  16. #41
    Aspiring Member Karmen's Avatar
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    Lana Mae: In Slovenia, I think the worst thing that can happen is to get beaten or robbed and even that is not very likely if you stay in safe neighbourhood and city centres. Most likely you would just get harassed by some drunk people if you go out alone during the night. And even that only if you're unlucky.
    Last edited by char GG; 06-02-2019 at 07:06 PM. Reason: Please see the rules

  17. #42
    Aspiring Member Eemz's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by docrobbysherry View Post
    I take every, "Have a good day, sir", in the spirit in which it's given!
    Yes that’s exactly what I meant too. If the intent is deliberately to try and hurt and/or embarrass a complete stranger, then I take that as a simple statement that the person is an a-hole and treat them the way they have asked to be treated.

    If there’s no intent then yes I take that at face value the way it was meant. I don’t think I fool anyone so I assume anyone saying ma’am is just being nice but I’ll take that too.
    Last edited by Eemz; 06-02-2019 at 06:09 PM.

  18. #43
    Silver Member CynthiaD's Avatar
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    I occasionally get “sired” in female mode, but not often. There’s only one thing you can do: ignore it. Just pretend it didn’t happen, and act as feminine as possible.

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