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Thread: The sister in law knows

  1. #1
    Member jessicabf's Avatar
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    The sister in law knows

    So interesting development. My SO was chatting with her sister, and it “slipped out” that I dressed. I was mortified when my SO told me. But now they want to go shopping and pick out something for me. I am not home, and won’t be for awhile. SO wants to do it the day before I get back, and surprise me. I guess I should be excited, but I’m nervous.
    Jessica BF

  2. #2
    Member amandagurl2014's Avatar
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    What a lovely situation to be in, the envy of many on here.

  3. #3
    Yendis Sidney's Avatar
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    Lord gal, relax and enjoy. They could be holding pichforks. It should be fine.

  4. #4
    Member HelpMe,Rhonda's Avatar
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    May we all be cursed with such problems. When do you figure this surprise will happen?

  5. #5
    Member jessicabf's Avatar
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    I am moving the family out to Missouri, and am already here settling in the new job. Will fly back July 4th to help pack up the house we sold. To save money i’m flying to a larger city, and my wife is driving over to pick me up. Her sister lives in that city. She is thinking to meet to the day before.

    I know I should be excited, but it’s the first time someone other than my wife knows. All the worst case scenarios keep running through my mind. >.<

  6. #6
    Platinum Member alwayshave's Avatar
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    Jessica, I think I'd be angry if my wife let that slip. If your OK with it, good for you.
    Please call me Jamie, I always_have crossdressed, I always will, "alwayshave".

  7. #7
    Member HelpMe,Rhonda's Avatar
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    Yes, I think if my wife knew, then my sister in law heard, it'd be pretty much like putting billboards up and sending out a Rhonda Alert. And my in laws are up the hill from here, walking distance.

    Anyhow, guess the rest of us will have to be excited about the surprise they're planning.

  8. #8
    Silver Member Bobbi46's Avatar
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    The worst that can happen is that the rest of your family find out if your SO let it slip out whats to stop your SIL letting it slip out further? no problem if your parents and everybody else are onboard with this but what if? I have been lucky with friends and so forth knowing butits not the same every time. In a way if I was you I would brace myself for some seriously bad fall out.
    may the gods go with you, I hope the future bodes well for you.
    I started life a lost man now I am a found woman

  9. #9
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    Hmmm, they might ask you to do a fashion show for them. Love it.

  10. #10
    Aspiring Member Robbiegirl's Avatar
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    Jessica based on your other posts, sounds like you have a great wife so I'm sure it will all work out !

    I am known for my sense of humor and have teased my sister in law to death over the years ! If she found out she would have a field day and for sure she would want me to model several of her things !

    May I ask how it could just have "slipped Out " ?

    Did it have to do with the move and maybe all the extra dresses ?

    Oh and is your SIL the same size as your wife ?
    Last edited by DAVIDA; 07-01-2019 at 09:49 AM. Reason: Quoting the OP isn't necessary.

  11. #11
    Silver Member Amy Lynn3's Avatar
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    WOW !! You are in a great situation. Two GG's to shop with is a dream come true for many and you are beautiful in your Avatar. All that should bode well for you. Who cares if your SIL tells others ? You have the most important person in your life on your side.....your wife. Have fun with all this and don't worry....100 years from now nobody will remember. lol

  12. #12
    Female Illusionist! docrobbysherry's Avatar
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    I usually HATE IT when someone buys something for Sherry! It never fits rite, doesn't look good on me, or is not my style!

    I usually just smile, say thank u, and forget about it!
    U can't keep doing the same things over and over and expect to enjoy life to the max. When u try new things, even if they r out of your comfort zone, u may experience new excitement and growth that u never expected.

    Challenge yourself and pursue your passions! When your life clock runs out, you'll have few or NO REGRETS!

  13. #13
    Silver Member Micki_Finn's Avatar
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    Omg you should totally ask them to wait so that you can go along. 1) Their taste probably won’t match yours 2) if you’re there you can ask questions and get feedback from a couple of GGs so you can learn!

  14. #14
    Platinum Member Angie G's Avatar
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    If your sister In low is cool with it then I say How sweet it is.
    Angie

  15. #15
    Carole carhill2mn's Avatar
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    I can understand why you are nervous but what a great opportunity! Embrace it and enjoy!
    Hugs, Carole

  16. #16
    Aspiring Member KymG's Avatar
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    The shopping sounds great.
    May i ask how it slipped out?
    This happened with some friends of mine, after only telling one person, now its about 8 or 9...

  17. #17
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    One of the issues not mentioned in the comments so far is how cross dressing affects a wife. When we were having "The Talk" years ago she expressed the inability to have someone to share her feelings. I've always said a wife ends up being held captive with the secret too. Since the 'cat is out of the bag' your wife now has someone to share your mutual secret. It is probably somewhat of a relief for her. She now has a close confident to express any misgivings or issues that may arise.

    I suspect the initial feelings will be something akin to apprehension. However, I think it will be a load off your mind and your wife's mind.

  18. #18
    Aspiring Member Eemz's Avatar
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    I know it's scary when people you haven't told start to find out. It probably feels like you have slightly lost some control over an important situation. That's probably part of the nervousness.

    Stephanie is right though; your SO needs support outside of you and she wouldn't have told her sister if she didn't trust her to be supportive - and she was right; look at the results.

    Don't overthink it - just enjoy

  19. #19
    Member jessicabf's Avatar
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    These are great perspectives. Thx.

    My wife says that her sister got into “reading numbers”. I’m not sure what that means. She reads a persons numbers to get insights into them? Idk.

    But anyways, she said that my numbers and my wife’s number connect in a way that means we have an exciting “intimate life”. She asked my wife if that was true, she said definitely “interesting and fun”. When my SIL asked again later what she meant, my wife sent her a link to xdress.com.

    My SIL thought it was great. So my wife send her a picture of a dress she had bought me. They bonded. So now they are going to go shopping just together.
    X-)

    I panicked when I found out, but my wife assured me that it would stay between them. ( *biteslip* )

    No one else knows about my other side, beside all you girls in the forum. So yeah, life’s developments. >.<

    I agree that I think my wife needed another female to confide in. And she has been so supportive from the beginning and guess I should support her back.

    So her sister is bigger, but has the same hair and eye color and complexion. (Maybe get a makeup tutorial from her instead of makeup counter? Lol) To big for my wife or I clothing wise. I’m not an overly large guy, 5’9-ish and 155lbs. I am usually in a size 12 or 14 dress.

    But yeah... thanks for the replies. I get the idea that it’s fun to have two sisters wanting to shop for me. But the years for mental stigma in me makes it hard to just relax about it.

    ttfn

    [SIZE=1]- - - Updated - - -[/SIZE]

    Thanks for the compliment. I need to post and updates pic. Hm. My wife did a test and says I am good with “cool summer” colors. I guess that means I need to ditch the red dress and get one with cooler tones.

    Quote Originally Posted by Amy Lynn3 View Post
    WOW !! You are in a great situation. Two GG's to shop with is a dream come true for many and you are beautiful in your Avatar. All that should bode well for you. Who cares if your SIL tells others ? You have the most important person in your life on your side.....your wife. Have fun with all this and don't worry....100 years from now nobody will remember. lol

  20. #20
    Platinum Member Crissy 107's Avatar
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    Jessica, You are a very lucky girl for sure, if my SIL knew everyone we know would know. That would be a nightmare for my wife not to mention me.
    Go enjoy the heck out of this. 😀
    Crissy

  21. #21
    Gold Member Sometimes Steffi's Avatar
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    I'm at the point where I almost don't care if my family finds out.

    My 50th high school anniversary is coming up, and I'm contemplating wearing an evening gown. My nosy first cousin was in my graduating class and once she finds out, the whole family will know. My parents both passed 15 and 20 years ago, and I only have one brother. The rest of "my whole family" is pretty small and one cousin is a Lesbian who married another woman a few years ago. I used to think another cousin was a Lesbian also, but now that I know so much more since the last time I saw her, I think she's probably FTM.

    I might take a chance. It would be fun to shock my schoolmates. I also know that another classmate is TG/CD, so maybe we could have fun with the whole thing.
    Hi, I'm Steffi and I'm a crossdresser... And I accept and celebrate both sides of me. Or, maybe I'm gender fluid.

  22. #22
    Aspiring Member Leelou's Avatar
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    What a great story, Jessica. Thanks so much for sharing. As others have mentioned, and you addressed in a response, it was good for your wife to be able to talk to someone about your crossdressing. It reminds me of what happened after I came out to my first wife in my early 20's. I actually came out to her before we got married and she was accepting. She did talk to one of her girlfriends because she just needed to talk to someone about it. It turned out that it totally let the cat out of the bag and I was soon out to our whole group of friends. I was never upset with her for talking to her friend. I understood she needed to talk to someone. It turned out to be a really cool time because no one freaked out about it.

    As others have mentioned, you're very fortunate. Have fun and enjoy this! It's really fun to be out of the closet to someone beyond your SO.

  23. #23
    Aspiring Artist Kelly DeWinter's Avatar
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    Cool story Jessica;

    Sometimes a spouse or SO wants or needs to talk to someone and use just about anything as an excuse. In my line of work , you would be surprised at some of the things clients let "slip". Most of the time it's something small about their spouse at other times I don't know whether to laugh, cry or run at some of the things they say. Just this week I learned what a 'thrupple" is. It was an awkward moment as I wasn't sure why they were imparting this information.

    Also don't expect it to stay between the 3 of you. The only time a secret is a secret is when only you know about it.

    Looking forward to hear what the gift is.
    Kelly DeWinter
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  24. #24
    Aspiring Member Eemz's Avatar
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    > years for mental stigma in me makes it hard to just relax about it.

    That's exactly it Jessica; you hit the nail on the head for a lot of us here. We spent years believing our world would *end* if anyone ever found out; you can't just switch that off overnight. Its great when it doesn't happen, but hard to trust it. It'll take some time for enough real experience to build up on the other side of the scales to balance out these imaginary fears. In the meantime, don't panic, maybe use the logical part of your brain to push yourself to trust it a bit more than your fears want you to. That helped me anyway.

  25. #25
    Senior Member April Rose's Avatar
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    Jessica, some years ago I decided that it wasn't fair to my wife to keep her in the closet with me. I made it clear that she was free to talk about my crossdressing with anyone she felt comfortable discussing it with. Since then she's talked it over with her
    sister, and several of her closest friends. Several of these have spoken about it with their spouses, whom we also are friends with.

    The net effect on me has been positive. None of them ever has even mentioned it, unless I bring it up. When I have, (which is rarely) the response has been positive or neutral, and my wife has been less stressed about the whole thing. She has friends she can blow off steam with when she needs to.

    Plus , your sister in law doesn't live in the city where you will be living and working. I say, just enjoy the ride.
    I am a vessel of the goddess. Let me express my calling to a feminine life through nurturing love and relatedness.

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