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Thread: Funny things I can't say to my wife

  1. #1
    Gold Member Sometimes Steffi's Avatar
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    Funny things I can't say to my wife

    My wife is DADT, so there's some things I can't tell her.


    My wife was in the bathroom doing her makeup when I asked her a question.

    She said, "I'm doing my eyes. I can't talk when I'm doing my eyes."

    My unspoken response, "OK, I thought I was the only one who couldn't talk while doing my eyes."


    My wife just had a knee replacement,, and has trouble getting into the car.

    My unspoken statement is, "Pretend you're wearing a long dress. Sit on the seat with both feet on the ground, and then just swing your feet in."


    Anyone have any others?
    Hi, I'm Steffi and I'm a crossdresser... And I accept and celebrate both sides of me. Or, maybe I'm gender fluid.

  2. #2
    Aspiring Member Karmen's Avatar
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    I don't have a wife, but similar experience I had at work with female coworkers or woman friends. Only a week ago it was about walking in heels. She wanted to use an elevator instead of using the stairs to go down 3 floors. I just wanted to say "I totally understand you. I wouldn't want to walk downstairs wearing almost 4 inch heels also", but I couldn't, otherwise she might start asking some awkward questions. A while ago a friend tripped while walking in platform shoes. I almost said "I know how hard it is to walk in them on the granite blocks", but I kept my mouth shut instead. But a few years ago I wasn't careful when talking about pantyhose and how easy it is to tear them if you're not careful and almost outed myself. An awkward questions started to appear, but I was saved by the phone bell.

  3. #3
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    Steffi,
    The great thing is I can say what more or less anything to GGs when I'm out and about .

    OK I have to watch my Ps & Qs with my wife on the phone but she just tells me straight ," I don't want to hear that !" It is hard even though I'm separated as it's a daily routine I'm living and I'm just chatting to her more as a friend .

  4. #4
    Aspiring Member Julie1123's Avatar
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    Wife: Will you carry my phone and keys? These jeans don’t have any pockets. It sucks.

    Me unspoken: Yeah, it sucks that women’s jeans don’t have pockets but they’re so much more comfortable than men’s jeans.

  5. #5
    Junior Member Jodi Yardley's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Julie1123 View Post
    Wife: Will you carry my phone and keys? These jeans don’t have any pockets. It sucks.

    Me unspoken: Yeah, it sucks that women’s jeans don’t have pockets but they’re so much more comfortable than men’s jeans.
    Excellent!

  6. #6
    Female Illusionist! docrobbysherry's Avatar
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    I found myself saying the "wrong things" often in my early years of marriage, Steffi. Then, learned it was better not to say anything than the wrong thing!

    That's one reason our marriage failed! U should be able to say pretty much ANYTHING to someone who loves and cares for u and vice versa!
    U can't keep doing the same things over and over and expect to enjoy life to the max. When u try new things, even if they r out of your comfort zone, u may experience new excitement and growth that u never expected.

    Challenge yourself and pursue your passions! When your life clock runs out, you'll have few or NO REGRETS!

  7. #7
    Member ambigendrous's Avatar
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    No secrets between my wife and I: she had carpal tunnel surgery 3 days ago and the day after the surgery she made a comment that I might have to help her hook her bra - I simply said "I can hook my bra behind my back; hooking yours should be no problem!" She simply laughed and said "smarty-pants!"
    Ambigendrous
    Wealth should not be measured by how much you have, but by how little you need - anon

  8. #8
    Silver Member Bobbi46's Avatar
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    That's really funny!
    I started life a lost man now I am a found woman

  9. #9
    Gold Member Sometimes Steffi's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by docrobbysherry View Post
    I found myself saying the "wrong things" often in my early years of marriage, Steffi. Then, learned it was better not to say anything than the wrong thing!

    That's one reason our marriage failed! U should be able to say pretty much ANYTHING to someone who loves and cares for u and vice versa!
    Yes, I should, but "should" is the operative word here.
    Hi, I'm Steffi and I'm a crossdresser... And I accept and celebrate both sides of me. Or, maybe I'm gender fluid.

  10. #10
    Senior Member Asew's Avatar
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    My wife is accepting so I can sympathize with these kind of things but doesn't like suggestions since she has been doing this kind of stuff longer.

  11. #11
    Senior Member Christie ann's Avatar
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    Hints with make up is a definite don't go there!

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