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Thread: Do you pass as a genetic woman?

  1. #51
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    No. I probably could have passed as a teenager, but that was a long time ago. I wish I could pass. That would be nice. However as I get older I realize that it isn't that important.

  2. #52
    Silver Member Helen_Highwater's Avatar
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    The simple definitive answer for me I think is yes and no.

    While out dressed I've on occasion interacted with a random GG. They've made a remark, a comment on the weather or some incident happening near by. Judging from their reaction it's only when I speak that they realise I'm not female. I'm under no illusion this is because of my makeup is so convincing that I look like a GG but more to do with my presenting an overall image that from most angles what the viewer sees is sufficient for them to think female. Shape, mannerisms, confidence, a decent wig, all create a picture. This for me is the essence of blending.

    Open my mouth, talk face to face the illusion is dispelled.

    And you know what? I'll take that. Hormones, surgery, dieting might move me closer to truly passing but for me passing means the viewer has no idea they're dealing with someone born male. That's beyond what nature gave me. If I can merge into the crowd, move about largely un-noticed then I'm a happy bunny.
    Who dares wears Get in, get out without being noticed

  3. #53
    Miss Judy Judy-Somthing's Avatar
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    NO! well maybe from across the street at night!
    "This is ME" I am not CRAZY, I'm just a GUY who likes dresses!
    Since allot of men dress up in woman's clothing that makes it a manly thing to do!
    Much more fun than fishing.
    I do construction like house building and I love CD-ing, what's the difference?

  4. #54
    AKA Lexi sometimes_miss's Avatar
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    Me? Nope.
    As far as others, someone else once wrote. to knock on your neighbor's door and ask for directions.

    See if they recognize the male you underneath 'the disguise', or if they actually believe that you're just some unknown female that just happens to look similar to their male neighbor.

    Betcha no one is willing to do that. They'd rather remain in their pink cloud. And I understand. But that doesn't mean that you pass.
    Some causes of crossdressing you've probably never even considered: My TG biography at:http://www.crossdressers.com/forums/...=1#post1490560
    There's an addendum at post # 82 on that thread, too. It's about a ten minute read.
    Why don't we understand our desire to dress, behave and feel like a girl? Because from childhood, boys are told that the worst possible thing we can be, is a sissy. This feeling is so ingrained into our psyche, that we will suppress any thoughts that connect us to being or wanting to be feminine, even to the point of creating separate personalities to assign those female feelings into.

  5. #55
    Member Becoming Brianna's Avatar
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    No I don't and I am trying to be okay with that. It is super hard and causes me much sadness and angst. I look at a woman who is killing it with her makeup and just looks beautiful and think "I can never have that I can never be that I can never look like that" and I feel so sad because I really want to be a woman like that. I want so badly to pass. My friends and parents tell me they think I eventually will but I don't believe them. Whenever I see a woman like that I can just feel my otherness so acutely.

  6. #56
    Of course she is. Patience's Avatar
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    No.

    But I pass as a generic woman.
    When all else fails, lower your standards.

  7. #57
    Lady in waiting Peggie Lee's Avatar
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    As happens lots of times I find my self standing in line in the ladies room waiting chatting away with the gals, no one has ever clocked me and it’s because my voice just sounds feminine, I’ve seen people’s expressions softened the moment they hear me talk, when living as a man this has always created a lot of problems for me. Being 70 years old I dress just the same as all the other grandmothers and remain practically invisible to most people.

  8. #58
    Silver Member Helen_Highwater's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Becoming Brianna View Post
    No I don't and I am trying to be okay with that. It is super nhard and causes me much sadness and angst. I look at a woman who is killing it with her makeup and just looks beautiful and think "I can never have that I can never be that I can never lomok like that" and I feel so sad because I really want to be a woman like that. I want so badly to pass. My friends and parents tell me they think I eventually will but I don't believe them. Whenever I see a woman like that I can just feel my otherness so acutely.
    Brianna,

    There are many truly lovely looking GG's that are admired not just by males but other GG's too. Those GG's know looking that good is beyond them and they have to content themselves going with what nature gave them.

    If we can look like those "average" GG's then we'll be doing okay. I know I'm never going to emulate some model but it's not beyond hope that I can look like miss/mrs average. If that then allows me to move amongst the crowd enfemme then I'll be more than content with that.

    Setting realistic goals for ourselves is vitally important if we're not going to drive ourselves to despair and/or deny ourselves access to the wider world.

  9. #59
    New Member Nikki_Caden's Avatar
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    No, I'll never pass. Distance, dim lights and soccer mom makeup are my best friends when I'm out and about as Nikki. I just try to dress to blend in more so than to pass and when I'm clocked it doesn't really bother me, I just smile and say "hi".

  10. #60
    Platinum Blonde member Ressie's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Peggie Lee View Post
    As happens lots of times I find my self standing in line in the ladies room waiting chatting away with the gals, no one has ever clocked me and it’s because my voice just sounds feminine, I’ve seen people’s expressions softened the moment they hear me talk... Being 70 years old I dress just the same as all the other grandmothers and remain practically invisible to most people.
    I believe this because a naturally fem voice makes a big difference. Even if I had a fem voice my big hands give me away.
    "You're the only one to see the changes you take yourself through", Stevie Wonder

  11. #61
    Senior Member Majella St Gerard's Avatar
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    anyone that says that they pass is delusional , there is NO WAY to tell, unless you are a mind reader. PASSING in pictures is way different than passing out in the RW. Damn, some REAL WOMEN don't pass in public.

  12. #62
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    Quote Originally Posted by Ressie View Post
    I believe this because a naturally fem voice makes a big difference. Even if I had a fem voice my big hands give me away.
    Re: the big hands issue. I had a GG friend who knew I was trans/cd before i dressed in front of her. She confidently said that she would instantly know, no matter how good my voice or make up; or carriage, or whatever. She told me it was simply my hand size.

    So.....I looked around at my friends and then net, and I came up with some pics of people and then their hands. I asked her to tell me which hands were male and which female. She got all half dozen wrong. It IS a good general rule, and as such will be used against you. But it is not hard and fast. Just as I don't have an adams apple. There are things to do to minimize your hands. Gloves in winter can work with some clothing. Long sleeves with cuffs do wonders. In the end though I have to agree that hands are probably the best way to clock a cd. Even if it is not a 100 percent correct thing!

    [SIZE=1]- - - Updated - - -[/SIZE]

    Quote Originally Posted by Majella St Gerard View Post
    anyone that says that they pass is delusional , there is NO WAY to tell, unless you are a mind reader. PASSING in pictures is way different than passing out in the RW. Damn, some REAL WOMEN don't pass in public.
    Majella, that really is quite harsh, and really, just wrong. Absolute statements are usually a bad idea. Here is why. Statistically some of will in fact pass. It is just a numbers game. Even if one person on the entire planet passed you just said that they suffered from a mental defect. There are in fact other ways than mind reading. I worked as an interrogator/interviewer for 8 years. I used to be able to read them like you might read a book. If I couldn't read an atypical response to my appearance, then I did not deserve to have held my position. Additionally if you know a group for a nice long time, you can ask them if at any time when they first met you that you passed. Finally as some observed, they do indeed pass till they open their mouth.

    Trust me not everyone who thinks they pass are mentally defective!

  13. #63
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    I am 72. As woman age, skin changes and weight is commonly added around the face and neck. Of course, I could not "pass" a close inspection, but I do well creating a substantial amount of uncertainty even in the mind of an inquisitive onlooker. These days, most folks are quite willing to give someone who looks vaguely female the benefit of the doubt. In this respect, I have become increasingly confident about my presentation in public, except for my voice. I try to avoid conversation because it is the most obvious giveaway even if I try to feminize it. Once, when I first started being adventurous, a Walmart checkout clerk took my money, gave me change and saw my poorly done nails, worse than a fourth grader's. She looked up at me in surprise as I started toward the exit, then moved out into the aisle, exclaiming, "That's man!", calling to another clerk. (My nail-work has improved since then and there have been no similar 'outs'.) More importantly, I was not particularly disturbed by the situation at the time, nor was I ever. So, can I pass? I guess it depends on the definition of "pass." I prefer to believe I am simply giving the world a chance to accept me as a conservatively dressed woman who is getting on in years.

  14. #64
    Aspiring Member Maid_Marion's Avatar
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    I'm nicely proportioned petite XS hourglass. No adams apple. High pitched well modulated voice. Prone to high rising terminal when I get tired. No sign of MPB. Lots of salt and pepper hair past my shoulders. I wear XS gloves. People have asked my age and think I look 15 years younger than my real age. I've been really good at protecting my skin from the sun for the past few decades.

    Do I pass? I don't care after getting misgendered all my life. Either way people remember me. I enjoy the sport of shopping for clothes, now that I have a huge choice of cheap clothes to buy that fits really well.
    Last edited by Maid_Marion; 07-26-2019 at 09:29 PM.

  15. #65
    Girl about Town Jodie_Lynn's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Tracy Irving View Post
    Do you 100% pass as a genetic woman when out engaging with the public?
    What does this even mean?

    There are GG's who are 5' 11" and taller; There are GG's who are built like linebackers; there are GG's who are petite, elfin creatures.

    There are GG's who have very masculine features, and GM's who have very delicate, feminine features, with slight frames.

    I personally know some GM's who could be pro footballers who are soooo flamboyantly swish, that they are almost caricatures of the gay man. And GG's who could give Mike Tyson a run for his money in the ring.
    Seriously, a GG bouncer at a club I go to, knocked a guy out cold when he got too 'grabby' with me. AND, she could have bench-pressed me!


    So please explain what you mean by "passing as a genetic woman?"
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  16. #66
    Member fun4metoo2004's Avatar
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    I am almost 59 and my first time out dressed as a woman was Halloween 2018. I am not saying that I passed, however I was not recognized as Man in a dress, I was not questioned, or given dirty looks. Everyone assumed that I was a woman until I spoke. My voice is never going to be low or high pitched enough to pass that way.

    Without trying I think I passed in most cases. I have a Pinup photo shoot 17 Aug, and plan to have lots of fun with that. Professional makeup and hair, great location etc.

  17. #67
    happy to be her Sarah Charles's Avatar
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    I've been ignored by the crowds but seen as "not-a-woman" by individuals. I've been complimented and acctpted by individuals. I've waited in line to use the ladies room with no comments that I heard. Other times when I've felt I was doing my best I was mis-gendered. So, no is my answer to the question.

  18. #68
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    In my early teens back in the late 60's - early 70's , with the help of a female cousin who had amazing makeup skills, i passed without any suspicion at all. But once full puberty set in I couldn't pass in a dark room full of people wearing sunglasses. The desire to fully dress has been gone since that period. It's been almost 50 years since I last wore makeup or fake boobs.

  19. #69
    Silver Member Helen_Highwater's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Sarah Charles View Post
    I've been ignored by the crowds but seen as "not-a-woman" by individuals.
    Sarah,

    I think that is perhaps the best description of what most of us can realistically expect when out and about. I'll add to that that even though we're seen as "not-a-woman" by individuals that doesn't mean we're treated badly or with discourtesy. Far from it.
    Who dares wears Get in, get out without being noticed

  20. #70
    Junior Member Elizabeth Marie's Avatar
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    Pass, no. Blend in, yes. I dress appropriately for a woman my age, and the occasion. I get a few double takes, especially when I speak, but for the most part I just blend into the crowd, just another late middle age woman. The first time my therapist saw me as Beth she said that I seem to know what I'm doing, and at first glance she would assume I was just another older woman.

  21. #71
    Gold Member Alice Torn's Avatar
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    Only from a distance sometimes.
    IT TAKES A REAL DRESS TO WEAR A MAN.

  22. #72
    Silver Member Sarah Louise's Avatar
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    The other day I got told I pass easily by a lady I met. Well obviously I don't as she never would have made that comment!

    But I blend ok.
    A girl can never have too many dresses

  23. #73
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    When shopping a couple of days ago at Ross DFL, I asked her to follow me at a distance to see what people might take a second look at me or make a rude gesture .. anything. She said none that she saw did anything of the sort. She told me that I blended very well. Nice to hear that!

  24. #74
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    I don't think it is true that most men can pass as women. In youth it may not be that hard, but as we get older the harder it would be. I could pass at 20, but not today. I do wear women's clothes. I wear fem clothes which are similar to women my age. A silk blouse is a blouse. I'm not looking for a SO I have a wife. I have worn the same top that someone else had on to parties and events. so there was little question about what I was wearing. I have worn a maxie dress to a pool party at the suggestion of one of our neighbors. All the girls were getting together and I was envited but had to come dressed like the other gals.

  25. #75
    Exploring NEPA now Cheryl T's Avatar
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    While I would love to believe that I do I know the truth is NO.
    That's ok, I simply want to be accepted for who I am. I just want to blend in with society. I'm not the standard bearer, the cheerleader or any of that. I'm one of the masses and happy that way.

    I've gotten the stares, the whispers and sometimes the compliments. That's how it goes.
    Can you see the REAL Me?

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