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Thread: Obsessive buying

  1. #1
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    Obsessive buying

    This is my first post, so check out my intro. I've spent the past few weeks lurking and browsing the older posts - there is so much valuable information here. I have only recently started dressing, so still trying to get all the boxes in my head back where they belong. From the older posts it seems like the obsessive collecting of women's clothing causes as much harm to relationships as the act of cross dressing itself. Is it common that cross dressers have extensive wardrobes, or did I just pick up some select posts? I did see mention of 200panties and 120 dresses, so some are obviously having a great time shopping.

  2. #2
    Gold Member Alice Torn's Avatar
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    It is a compulsion and or addiction, and is a high, for sure. I got rid of 99% of my lady things a few years ago, made a commitment to stop dressing. I only have bought 4 dresses since,and one pair of shoes. It CAN take over ones life VERY EASILY. I wish i had all the money i have spent on this. I could sure use it now! I have never had a wife or lover, so it is a bit of a substitute, too. Every person on here is different though, but shares this desire or compulsion.
    IT TAKES A REAL DRESS TO WEAR A MAN.

  3. #3
    Yeah Ok like whatever Tracii G's Avatar
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    Some here have been dressing in womens clothes for decades so the acquiring of lots of ladies clothes is common.
    Some do have obsessions with hose ,panties,wigs whatever I had it with ladies jeans and had 150 or so.
    Down to maybe 10 pair now but I do have lots of shoes . How many pairs of shoes do I have? I don't know I stopped counting years ago.
    Last edited by Tracii G; 08-21-2019 at 05:03 AM.
    Head Executive Chief of the Dept of Redundancy Dept.

  4. #4
    Platinum Blonde member Ressie's Avatar
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    Shopping does tend to become obsessive for many. Realistically, there are probably more CDs that keep a small stash since they're totally in the closet. And those in that group are less apt to post anything.
    "You're the only one to see the changes you take yourself through", Stevie Wonder

  5. #5
    Senior Member Bobbi46's Avatar
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    Also its having the ability to control "the pink fog" only too easy to become embroiled in buying the bargains all of the time but economy comes in as well!
    I started life a lost man now I am a found woman

  6. #6
    Aspiring Shopaholic BTWimRobin's Avatar
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    I never used to understand why some women are addicted to shopping. I totally get it now that I have been CDing. It's the thrill of the hunt, trying to find that perfect dress, shoes,whatever at a bargain basement price. It can be very addictive. I have a blast each time I go. I can easily see how one can end up with a closet full of "nothing to wear."

  7. #7
    Senior Member Allison Chaynes's Avatar
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    Can't disagree. I purge stuff that I don't wear and then end up seeing great deals I can't pass up. Last night I bought three floral swim briefs for $1 each at Walmart.... didn't need them but the price was awesome!
    Life is too short to be boring.

  8. #8
    Aspiring Member NancyJ's Avatar
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    Like with everything, there are all types of personalities in the crossdressing community. I would venture a guess that there is no greater percentage of “compulsive collectors” or hoarders here than within any other group. For those who “fetish dress” an item might seem more exciting when it is new or some might get a thrill from a large or unusual collection.

    I’ll bet most have practical wardrobes acquired over time. I have bought many clothes that do not fit because I was too scared to try them on in the store or thrift shop, or thought I’d just take a chance online. I treat my girl clothes like any other — when my panties start showing wear, I toss them and get new. I feel no compunction to “collect.” Clothes, to me, are for wearing. Nancy
    Last edited by NancyJ; 08-21-2019 at 12:34 PM.

  9. #9
    Yeah Ok like whatever Tracii G's Avatar
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    I pulled a big bunch of things out of my girl closet I can't wear anymore so its going to Goodwill today and I will do some shopping for some new things just for the fun of it.
    I love shopping for clothes and for me it is the thrill of the hunt.
    I get the same thrill shopping for WWII military memorabilia or antique radios.
    Heck even vintage guitars for that matter.
    Last edited by Tracii G; 08-21-2019 at 07:08 AM.
    Head Executive Chief of the Dept of Redundancy Dept.

  10. #10
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    It's hard not to be compulsive to buy, I try not to buy a lot yet I do, now because I have breast forms I need another do more Bras different sizes, but Panties I could not resist the urge to buy.

  11. #11
    Mannequiniste ! Stacy Darling's Avatar
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    Welcome

    I guess we all differ, some of us are fashionistas, some are primarily into comfort and the list goes on!

    May it be that it's just who we are?

    Always Stacy!
    STOP, Well I just dance the way I feel
    Stop breathing imagine none of this is real

    Well I just dance the way I feel
    Well I just dance the way I feel
    Well I just dance the way I feel
    "Ou Est Le Swimming Pool"

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    Panties are my weakness. I don't need 200 panties. But every time a new season comes around there are new prints and new colors. I can't stop myself, I have to have the new colors just because they're pretty!

  13. #13
    Silver Member Micki_Finn's Avatar
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    I think it’s fairly common but not a rule nor immutable. There are a lot of dressers that essentially fetishize the clothes and obsessively collect things like panties.
    There are also a lot of dressers that aren’t necessarily like that, but go through purchasing a lot of clothes early on while they try to refine their personal style (this was me). I’d buy everything I thought was cute and ended up with a lot of stuff that didn’t work For me. I eventually got a better handle on things and now I know what I like and what works for me so the clothes purchasing is much more under control.

  14. #14
    Exploring NEPA now Cheryl T's Avatar
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    Extensive wardrobe?
    Guilty as charged. If you look in my closet you will find that 90% of what hangs there is women's clothing. It took me decades to come out of the closet and that made so much more room for my clothes...LOL.
    I wear mostly feminine things in my daily life so they don't really go to waste. All my jeans, shorts, socks, t-shirts are from the women's aisle. I have 25 pair of shoes and boots, over 100 pair of panties, 32 bras, and a drawer full of stockings.
    What can I say, as the song goes "I enjoy being a girl".
    Can you see the REAL Me?

  15. #15
    Seņora Member Robertacd's Avatar
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    I came to this conclusion years ago:

    Women's clothing is what I know in my heart I should be wearing. Yet every day I would get dressed in menswear. So in my head I am constantly thinking "I have nothing to wear.", that leads to buying anything and everything that fits.

    I have found that since I have come out as TG, my obsession with clothing has decreased. Now that I regularly go out dressed, I only buy clothes that I will actually wear in public.

  16. #16
    Seamstress of Skirts Asew's Avatar
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    I have been out for a year and half and went from a single skirt to maybe a 100 items. Definitely smaller than my wife's collection, and we probably bought a similar amount of items in that timeframe Though I spent a lot less since most of my items were from the thrift store and everything else is on sale or cheap to start with. I have slowed down but I find it hard to not want to head to the thrift stores and look for another deal. I try to remind myself that I have plenty of options now so I don't really need anything.

  17. #17
    AKA Lexi sometimes_miss's Avatar
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    I basically stopped buying stuff once I reached the point where I had what I wanted. If something special comes along, I will buy that, but I don't engage in the 'retail therapy' of many purchases, which so many women do, going on spending sprees to distract themselves from other mental turmoil.
    Some causes of crossdressing you've probably never even considered: My TG biography at:http://www.crossdressers.com/forums/...=1#post1490560
    There's an addendum at post # 82 on that thread, too. It's about a ten minute read.
    Why don't we understand our desire to dress, behave and feel like a girl? Because from childhood, boys are told that the worst possible thing we can be, is a sissy. This feeling is so ingrained into our psyche, that we will suppress any thoughts that connect us to being or wanting to be feminine, even to the point of creating separate personalities to assign those female feelings into.

  18. #18
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    I will only speak for myself. In some sense buying too much of anything, whether it is clothing or something else, it is a form of retail therapy. I am in a "Don't Ask, Don't Tell" marriage. My wife is not on board with her husband wearing women's clothing. Therefore there is no vestige of my desire to emulate a woman for her to see. I do not modify my body. Fortunately, my genetic profile has kept my body almost totally hairless from birth. I do not color my toe nails. What's a guy to do to keep his head screwed on straight? Yep, I got 162 dresses. Over four hundred slips. Hundreds of panties. I am on this site which is also a form of therapy. Buying an excessive amount of clothing I know I will never wear keeps my head screwed on straight. Currently, in order to satisfy my internal drive I am collecting panties in the styles I like. It's like collecting stamps. Most people buy stamps to mail a letter or pay a bill. Why stick stamps in a book and look at them? I choose to collect panties. I am diverting attention away from the fact societal norms and expectations as well as my wife adhering to them precludes slipping into a dress and heels and heading off to the grocery store. If society was no so stuck up with categorizing everyone into a box my wardrobe of dresses would be akin to my male wardrobe. I have roughly four pairs of shorts and six pairs of jeans I wear. I wear black or white vee neck tees shirts. My male wardrobe is typical of any man, although I do collect "Peanuts/Snoopy" graphic tee shirts of which I have a couple hundred. I'll never wear them like I'll never wear those hundred of different colorful panties.

    I'd rather think my over indulgences are retail therapy, not a compulsive disorder.

  19. #19
    Member LydiaL's Avatar
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    Like Stephanie, I do not consider myself an Obsessive Buyer of women's clothing. I am a devoted Collector!

  20. #20
    Yeah Ok like whatever Tracii G's Avatar
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    I wear womens clothes 24/7 so I view them as my clothes basically. I just buy when I need to or when I see something I like.
    Its not like I go shopping everyday or have the compulsion to buy something everyday.
    I'm pretty frugal.
    Head Executive Chief of the Dept of Redundancy Dept.

  21. #21
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    I'm only obsessed with makeup. I've only purchased one dress and that was two months ago.

    Everytime I go to the pharmacy, to pick up my prescription, I always check out the clearance section for makeup.

  22. #22
    Yeah Ok like whatever Tracii G's Avatar
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    The thing with make up it does have a expiration date so keep that in mind.
    Head Executive Chief of the Dept of Redundancy Dept.

  23. #23
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    I have been buying womenswear for about 40 years and have got rid of maybe 5% of that. The current collection is about 1000 skirts, slightly more dresses, around 2000 tops of various types and probably 350 pairs of shoes. I have never counted panties or tights. It is not that much per month - how fortunate that I am not addicted!

    In my defence I wear them most of the time. I live on my own so there is no one to tell me to cut back on the spending. I can afford it but I would obviously be a lot better off without this shopping habit.

  24. #24
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    First thing is WELCOME;
    Yes some times are charge cards are bigger that we think, and we come home with lots of clothes.
    The fun thing is trying all them on.
    have Fun.
    rader

  25. #25
    Member April Rose's Avatar
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    I have no compulsion to shop. I like pretty clothes and will buy things I like when the opportunity presents itself. When I shop, I always keep in mind what I already have and try to look look for items I can coordinate with the things in my current wardrobe. I have a basic understanding of what colors and patterns I can get away with, and the self discipline not to spend money on an outfit that obviously wont work for me no matter how adorable it might look in the store.

    My goal is a pretty and practical wardrobe appropriate for a woman my age.
    Last edited by April Rose; 08-21-2019 at 03:42 PM. Reason: addition
    I am a vessel of the goddess. Let me express my calling to a feminine life through nurturing love and relatedness.

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