I hope you dont mind me answering... I AM the supportive wife... and I speak to Sam the same way about clothes whether he is dressed or not... Sam usually points out clothes that would look good on me (that I would normally not consider). I will sometimes point out things that will look good on him but we havent had time to clothing shop lately with a baby. I do give him things from my wardrobe though that I think would look good on him.. and vice versa...
I never forget that Sam is a male when he is dressed.. at the back of my mind.. he is Sam... who is coincidentally a genetic male... There's no switch that suddenly turns off to say.. "Sam is female!"