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Thread: openly discriminated against

  1. #1
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    openly discriminated against

    This is the first time in a while that I can remember anyone openly being hostile toward me because of crossdressing. I had a guy insist I use the ladies room a while back, but he was kinda going the opposite direction LOL.

    I went to a thrift store that I go in some times, mostly in male mode. I was wearing a purple dress and tan pantyhose this time though. I found a few household items like christmas decorations and some pantyhose and made my way to the cashier. The 50ish lady refused to ring me out when I got to the register. She said that "I am not going to serve you" and made a comment to the lady behind me (a gg btw) that she does not have to wait on people like us. I told her to just go get someone that is willing to ring me up (because I dont care if she rings me up or if someone else does, I am not there to be a missionary of crossdressing, just to buy my stuff) and the manager comes up after a minute or so. The lady behind me yelled at him about having bad service and how the cashier thought she was a man. (I think the cashier thought we were together and the woman did have some masculine features) So the manager tells the cashier to get her things and go home, she's not employed there any longer! She argues with him for a minute and then starts yelling at me about how this is my fault. I told her that I didn't ask her to get her boss, just someone to ring me up and that if she didnt like dealing with the public she was in the wrong line of work anyhow. The manager apologized and I thought about asking if I could work there and take her place, but I already work too much.

    Anyhow, it was a kinda scary adventure. On one hand, I dont care what people think, and on the other if they are going to work public jobs they should be prepared to serve all of the public.

  2. #2
    Gold Member Sometimes Steffi's Avatar
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    I guess a few people learned a lesson there, you (stick up for yourself), the GG behind you who stuck up for you and maybe herself also, and the cash register lady who wanted to see what was more important: God or George Washington. Clearly, George won by a mile. The manager really knew her job, and had the power to enforce it.

    I used to be afraid to stick up for myself. I was at an Ulta and purchased some lipstick to get a gift with purchase. The cashier rang it up without the gift with purchase. Normally, I would have just paid and slunk out with my purchases. But this time I decided to argue with her. As I was arguing, the line of GGs behind me kept getting longer and longer. And everyone knew some dude was buying lipstick But, I stuck to my guns and finally got my GWP. It was a good lesson to learn. I was terribly embarrassed, both for arguing with the cashier and for being so obviously a dude buying lipstick. But, I lived to buy another day.
    Last edited by Sometimes Steffi; 08-23-2019 at 09:47 AM.
    Hi, I'm Steffi and I'm a crossdresser... And I accept and celebrate both sides of me. Or, maybe I'm gender fluid.

  3. #3
    Aspiring Member EllieOPKS's Avatar
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    I am proud of you for standing your ground. That took guts. The immediate thought that went thru my head was to drop the stuff and run, but you did the absolute right thing. So did the manager. Maybe she can find a nice hate group to join. Lol

  4. #4
    Gold Member Lana Mae's Avatar
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    You did the right thing! Prejudice like that has no place in today's world! I must say, I am from North Carolina and have not had that problem! Kudos on your response! Hugs Lana Mae
    Life is worth living!
    "Foxy lady! You look so good!!" Jimi Hendrix

  5. #5
    Gold Member Alice Torn's Avatar
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    I am sorry the cashier spoke to you like this. People need to just do their job and serve the customers,regardless of their personal beliefs. She was hired to just do her job. I am sorry she hurt herself, and lost her job, too.

  6. #6
    Gracious Colleague looking_good's Avatar
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    Like others - very impressed! In a difficult situation, you were resolute and reasonable. Also impressed with the manager and an organization that supports that decision and action. Much to learn from this.
    Simply an avid clothing enthusiast...

  7. #7
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    You did the right thing. We need to stand our ground against hate and discrimination.

    If you didn't take time to thank the manager, you should write her a nice letter and maybe send a copy to the head office if it's a chain store

  8. #8
    Silver Member Aunt Kelly's Avatar
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    Arguably, the store could have done a better job of training its employees, but the manager is to be commended for doing the right thing. Let us hope that manager is not taken to task for violating the bigot's "religious liberty".

  9. #9
    Female Illusionist! docrobbysherry's Avatar
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    Hosekid, I think u should have titled your post, "Standing up to a hater!" Because u weren't discriminated against. The store manager and store policy seemed quite accepting.

    I think it's wonderful that u stood up for yourself and even if unintentionally, us! Thank u!

    It's situations like this that prevent me from going to vanilla venues dressed willingly!
    Last edited by docrobbysherry; 08-23-2019 at 04:40 PM.
    U can't keep doing the same things over and over and expect to enjoy life to the max. When u try new things, even if they r out of your comfort zone, u may experience new excitement and growth that u never expected.

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  10. #10
    Member CD Tammy's Avatar
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    A couple decades ago, I got talked into volunteering at a local thrift store. One of the things that I had to do was sort the clothing. One of the perks was that the charity said we could take whatever we wanted without charge. Good thing no one looked in the bags that I took home.

  11. #11
    Silver Member Micki_Finn's Avatar
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    There’s a saying in retail. “Everyone’s wallet is green on the inside.” Not surprised one iota that said employee was terminated.

  12. #12
    Senior Member Asew's Avatar
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    I wonder if the cashier learned a lesson or is just blaming you (or all of us here). But good for that manager for correcting the situation swiftly

  13. #13
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    The cashier was never taught respect by her parents obviously.
    Sadly people like that are common place these days.
    Kinda funny she blamed you for what she did LOL.
    Sadly again there are a lot of people like that.
    Last edited by Tracii G; 08-23-2019 at 02:58 PM.

  14. #14
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    You did the correct thing, Get the Boss, Your money is as green as the next person.
    A Big WELL DONE from me.
    Rader

  15. #15
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    Quote Originally Posted by Asew View Post
    I wonder if the cashier learned a lesson or is just blaming you
    Sad to say, but people like that never believe they are at fault and this will only increase her hatred of people like us.

    She is probably already telling all her friends about how some "tranny" got her fired.

  16. #16
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    Roberta there will come a time when the cashier realizes she did the wrong thing by acting the way she did.
    Maybe a week maybe a year but when she realizes it she will feel pretty bad and that will stay with her for her whole life.
    Last edited by Tracii G; 08-23-2019 at 04:05 PM.

  17. #17
    Silver Member CynthiaD's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Tracii G View Post
    Roberta there will come a time when the cashier realizes she did the wrong thing by acting the way she did.
    Maybe a week maybe a year but when she realizes it she will feel pretty bad and that will stay with her for her whole life.
    Perhaps. But most likely she will remain bitter her whole life.

  18. #18
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    You ran into a person with very poor manners and very poor judgement. She got the result she deserved.
    Remember always that you not only have the right to be an individual, you have an obligation to be one.

    Eleanor Roosevelt

  19. #19
    New Member Bridgette Azure's Avatar
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    Good to see that hate leads to self-destruction. I'm so sorry this happened to you.

  20. #20
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    Hi Kid , You just can't fix Stupid !! >Orchid ..oo..
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  21. #21
    YOULOVEMYTOES Palaina Nocturnus's Avatar
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    I'm so happy for you standing up to oppression! That lady got what she deserved.

  22. #22
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    As others have said, Well done, HK, WELL DONE!

  23. #23
    Silver Member giuseppina's Avatar
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    Good for you for standing up for yourself, Hosekid.

    I somehow doubt the ex-employee learned very much, if anything. Prejudice takes a concerted effort to overcome.

  24. #24
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    Oops my bad didn't mean to go there...

    Anyway some people will just dig in deeper and double down when they are called out or when when you try to use logic and reason to convince them they might be wrong.

  25. #25
    Member Valery L's Avatar
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    I love happy endings.

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