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Thread: Age at which you came to grips

  1. #1
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    Age at which you came to grips

    I've been wearing women's clothing since I started wearing my sister's swim suits, then nylons, then dresses and panties around 12 or 13. With ZERO disrespect meant, I've notice I'm a minority insofar as my age. I'm heterosexual, but the past 20 years I've accumulated and spent at LEAST $20,000 on lingerie, heels.. My question? Why am I in the minority? Again, no disrespect meant, but please don't delete the post. I just feel like I'm a stranger, here, when I am really struggling with what I think is a fetish, but borderline want to be, and feel, like a gorgeous woman.

    [SIZE=1]- - - Updated - - -[/SIZE]

    And wearing a not so "classy" dress and 10" platform heels, a thong, a bra, putting on make up and lipstick, and walking around the house with confidence has become somewhat of an addiction. Advice, needed. <3
    Last edited by Di; 09-07-2019 at 05:26 AM. Reason: Please read the RULES on what is NOT permitted in this support forum / tks

  2. #2
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    Sounds like you have a fetish and like to dress like a hooker.
    This site isn't your regular CD/ pron hub site.
    None of this is a fetish for me and never has been.Its who I am.
    None of this is sexual for me so we seem to differ in that respect.


    I will say welcome and glad you found this site.
    I hope some here can help you find what you are looking for.
    Age is just a number so don't worry too much about that.
    Last edited by Tracii G; 09-06-2019 at 10:41 PM.

  3. #3
    Super Moderator char GG's Avatar
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    Hi INeedThis123,

    I see this is your first post. You may want to tell us a little bit about yourself in Introductions.

    Please take a look at the forum rules: https://www.crossdressers.com/forums/faq.php

    Hope you enjoy the forum.

  4. #4
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    As I said, no disrespect meant, nor do I think this is a pornographic message board. Thought it was a place that could help me be me. Sorry.

  5. #5
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    No problem, no reason to be sorry.
    We do get an occasional visitor that thinks this site is like a lot of the others that are kind of pornish.
    I know you weren't being disrespectful and if we can help there are many here that would be glad to help.
    I came to grips in my late 40s to answer your first question.

  6. #6
    Weirdest woman ever! docrobbysherry's Avatar
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    Don't get put off, Need This! I identify as a fetish dresser and there r quite a number here!

    Not only that, there r very few dressers here or anywhere that haven't been turned on by their dressing at one time or another!

    I would wager u r far from being in the minority on that issue here!
    U can't keep doing the same things over and over and expect to enjoy life to the max. When u try new things, even if they r out of your comfort zone, u may experience new excitement and growth that u never expected.

    Challenge yourself and pursue your passions! When your life clock runs out, you'll have few or NO REGRETS!

  7. #7
    Oh to be an English Rose Jane G's Avatar
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    Welcome to the forum. This is most definitely a place that will help you understand who you are. Spend time here. Read what others have experienced. There are such I wide spectrum of CD and transgender folk who pop in and out on this site. That makes it both a place to realize there are other people very like you and that every one is different and has their own battles, hangups, predudice, tollerance, you get the picture I hope.

    Stick around? Be execpting of others, who may have very different views on being a CD and you will eventually find what you seek. For me it took around 40 years before I fully understood who I am.

  8. #8
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    The one thing to remember when you think you are the only one that feels a certain way you will find that you are not the only one and there may be many that feel the same way you do.

  9. #9
    Administrator Di's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Tracii G View Post
    The one thing to remember when you think you are the only one that feels a certain way you will find that you are not the only one and there may be many that feel the same way you do.
    Love that thanks Tracii G

    Stick around read ( esp the rules lol sorry I’m a Admin had to say it ) and you will find like minded people.
    I’m sure you will make friends and learn from each other.
    How you started dressing is how many started some progress others do not . It’s not a race just be you.
    If you are a Genetic Female (Female at Birth) and would like to join us in the F.A.B. Forum, please follow the link.

    F.A.B. Forum Access

    Sherlyn,My beautiful sweet girl
    You forever and always will be my one and only true love . ❤️

  10. #10
    Platinum Member Teresa's Avatar
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    INeedthis...,
    Please don't think you are different , I've checked your age and I can't think you are so different to many of us at that age . I agree you are spending a bucket of money at the moment , I would suggest you try and deal with that as dressing doesn't need that kind on money to enjoy it, that appears to be your addiction !

    To make it clearer I may be late sixties now but it all kicked off for me when I was 8-9 years old , the T kicked in on top of a female trait and the rest is history as they say . CDing evolves ,we may be all different but the stages are similar in many cases , after all these years I'm now happily in balance and comfortable with it but it has come at a price . If I'm addicted to anything it's being out in the RW , I guess because I've found me !
    The real me ,no going back.

  11. #11
    Gold Member Helen_Highwater's Avatar
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    We're all different and the route we took into our dressing can be one only we have traveled. What we see, what pleases each of us when we look in the mirror again can differ widely and if "And wearing a not so "classy" dress and 10" platform heels, a thong, a bra, putting on make up and lipstick, and walking around the house with confidence has become somewhat of an addiction." is what floats your boat then who are we to offer criticism?

    Are you looking to move on with your dressing, to dress in a way more in keeping in what average GG's wear on a daily basis? To perhaps one day take your dressing out and about into the wide world? If that's not for you then so be it but if it's something that you'd like to experience then this is definitely the place. There's much sound and considered advice to be found here.

    Think about what it is you're looking to achieve and then ask away. All you'll get in honest answers.

    When did I really get to grips with my dressing? Probably in my 50's having dressed in some way right from a 5 year old. Good things are worth waiting for.
    Last edited by Helen_Highwater; 09-07-2019 at 07:14 AM.
    Who dares wears Get in, get out without being noticed

  12. #12
    Senior Member Jean 103's Avatar
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    First you differently are not alone.

    They don't talk about sex here. So just stay away from that and you will be good.

    I would guess that there are more people here like you than me.

    I have a boyfriend that is a fetish dresser. He is into leather. Has no interest in going out in public, or meeting anyone else.

    I'm completely the opposite. I live in the real world as Jean.

    So stick around, you just might find the help you are looking for.

  13. #13
    Aspiring Member Sabrina133's Avatar
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    Welcome to the group. As most have already said - the thing about this site is that we are all unique and, at the same time all part of the larger whole. You will find that our stories, reason for dressing, what we like and dislike is extremely varied.

    Bree

  14. #14
    Silver Member Leslie Mary S's Avatar
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    I most likely started when I was about nine (1952) but did not realize it fully until about 2002. I have also gone to the extreme and done a few nights as a Drag Queen performer.
    I have made excursions out of my "Closet" on several occasions, this coming week end is one such trip, going out on the town for my 76th birthday.
    So come on in. We all are unique, but don't feel lonely, As you stick around you will start feeling like a part of the group.
    Leslie Mary Shy
    A Southern Belle Hippo in a Tutu. If you see a man in female clothes, he might be happy, but it does not mean he is gay.

  15. #15
    Silver Member LilSissyStevie's Avatar
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    The problem for a so-called fetish dresser who wonders what it's all about is that fetish sites are generally populated by people who only want to indulge their fetish fantasies and non-fetish sites are more puritanical than typical Southern Baptitsts and only want to indulge their gender fantasies. Both types of sites can be vapid in different ways but sometimes there's a glitch in the matrix that allows something interesting through. I started crossdressing 60 years ago and I'm still coming to grips with it.

  16. #16
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    My cross dressing started with trying on my mother's slips. Then it was her girdles, bras, hosiery and panties and one particular sun dress I fit into. I never went through a "trashy looking" period. I'm not a psychologist so I am not skilled at psychoanalyzing anyone. However, when I emulate a woman it's based on my perception of a woman I would want to be. Or I feel I am when she comes to the forefront. My wife and I have been married for almost fifty years. I'm past seventy. I do not dress like my teenage granddaughter. If I was a teenage girl I would have no problem dressing like my granddaughter. She has excellent taste in clothes and makeup, but, does not get anywhere near a "trashy look." I can't explain "trashy" other than I know it when I see it.

    It's all about "different strokes for different folks." I do not agree every cross dressers goes through a "hooker" look. My perception of a woman is not a hooker. Hookers are an aberration to womanhood. My wife was a drop dead gorgeous young woman when I met her (still is). Her attire was sexy yet tasteful because sexy is a lot more than the clothes and makeup.

    If your cross dressing niche is not classy, so be it. I don't want to step on toes, but, if I was you I'd examine my perception of a woman.

  17. #17
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    Hello Ineedthis,

    I’m 52 and still trying to understand who I am. I’ve been wearing women’s clothing off and on all my life. For me that feeling that this is a fetish comes from my upbringing. Being told wanting to wear women’s clothes is wrong and something is wrong with you. Have I thought this is a fetish, yes. Which is why I put Angela away for a long time. I’m finally beginning to understand this is not a fetish. I enjoy putting on a dress and felling like a woman. I eventually want to go out and feel like a woman but that’s a long way off.

  18. #18
    Senior Member Tracy Irving's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by INeedThis123 View Post
    want to be, and feel, like a gorgeous woman.
    There are more than a few members that share your desire.

    This site contains a wealth of insight and information from some wonderful people. You're only a stranger if you want to be.

  19. #19
    Silver Member Aunt Kelly's Avatar
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    No one point in time s te and out in a lifetime on the TG spectrum, but there were a couple of milestones. At 38, I let go of the guilt and accepted. Around 58 it became clear that i was more than a CD. At 61 I finally used the word transsexual in reference to myself.

  20. #20
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    I’m 44 and have really come to terms with this over the past 1-2 years. I can’t tell you that I fully understand it, but at this point in my life I no longer try to hide it. I initially thought it was more of a kink but over the years realize that it’s way beyond that. I suppose that I still have some guilt issues and this is something that very few people know about - fortunately my wife is one of those people and she’s supportive. However, I’m OK being Jules and I have a great time with it.

  21. #21
    Gold Member alwayshave's Avatar
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    I was 44 when I came to grips with it. I had hidden it from my ex-wife because I knew she would never accept. When I left her for reasons unrelated to dressing, I knew that I would never hide it form any future partner. I have been with my now wife for 13 years and came out to her about 8 months into out relationship before we moved in together. She accepted and I have been happy ever since.
    Please call me Jamie, I always_have crossdressed, I always will, "alwayshave".

  22. #22
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    I would have to say I was in my 40's when I finally came to grips with the obsessive buying. In my case it came down to coming out as transgender and actually going out dressed as often as I can. As now I only buy clothes that I will actually wear out in public, it's not like I am going to wear a ball gown or stripper heals to the grocery store.

    Believe me I used to obsess over certain items, or styles you can probably even find evidence of that here. One day I realized that in my mind these are the clothes I should always be wearing but since I don't, my mind keeps telling me I have nothing to wear but these ugly boy clothes. So I should to buy more clothes and it didn't really matter what as long as it fit before I started going out.
    Last edited by Robertacd; 09-08-2019 at 11:32 AM. Reason: more added for clarity

  23. #23
    Slip Into Something Femme Piora's Avatar
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    For many years, I was a "fetish dresser", and used that for sexual gratification. Often, I still do that. But it was only after joining this site, and reading what other members were doing and experiencing that I began to explore other avenues of dressing that had not actually occurred to me previously. Before, I had only dressed in lingerie....no "outer clothing" such as dresses, blouses, skirts etc. I still have a passion for those - but I now dress as close to what actual everyday women might wear....knee-length skirts, dresses, tops, jackets etc. During these periods, I don't try for sexual purposes...I enjoy feeling and looking feminine. It's become a "dual-crossdressing" aspect for me.
    "Taking the time to be in touch with my feminine side"

  24. #24
    Junior Member Kelly-o's Avatar
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    Hello Need This, It can be a journey for sure and it is vastly different from person to person as you can see here. I started out more as a Fetish as well finding my sisters things exciting when I was an early teen, then I went dormant for a while got married then it came back part time. Now I dress most everyday and it's not really a fetish but just a part of who I am. I consider myself rather fluid being comfortable as either. I would say about my late 30's was when things changed from a fetish mindset to maybe acceptance of another part of me if that makes sense to you. It's a bit hard to put into words I am finding.

  25. #25
    Member Megan b's Avatar
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    For me it was my early 40s. That's when I finally excepted this side of me. I started down this path of crossdressing when I 12 or 13 years old. I didn't exactly know what a fetish was but fits me pretty good for that time and for many years to come. But as time went by I evolved from just dressing in lingerie to being able to present as woman around the house. This lead me to take it from home to out in public. Scariest thing I ever done and the most exciting thing I ever done. I was hooked from that moment on. Even though I excepted this other side of me my wife could not and so ended a 22year marriage. I'm in my early 50's now and go out on a regular bases as Megan. I have as many or more ladies clothes as i do mens oh well I do love to shop.
    Last edited by Megan b; 09-08-2019 at 09:07 PM. Reason: added a sentence

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