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Thread: Is it like a self fulfilling prophecy?

  1. #26
    Gold Member Alice Torn's Avatar
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    Allie, That is in San Fran. No problems to go full time there. Try small midwestern or southern redneck small towns, I t would not be the same at all.
    IT TAKES A REAL DRESS TO WEAR A MAN.

  2. #27
    Junior Member
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    I understand the point Jean is trying to make and agree with the sentiment. I also understand why some don't venture outside the confines of trans-centric gathering places. I am making a distinction between trans-centric and trans "friendly" for a reason which I will get to in a minute.

    For those members who are CDs because of a fetish or are just hobbyists then it makes sense to just get together with other CDs and only go to CD events. Since the idea of just dressing up in female clothing and related accoutrements is enough to be exciting for some I can see how those gatherings can be entertaining to them. It would be no different than Trekkies attending Star Trek conventions all the time and stamp collectors going to Philatelic Society meetings. That common interest is what bonds them together.

    However, I really do not understand at all why some people whose goal is to emulate a female a much as possible only goes to trans events and venues. Those who are in a DADT relationship might have problems venturing out. That's understood. For others, after going to a few TG meetings and events to ease their way into the outside world I don't understand the appeal of going back to them for social reasons (unless again, you are a hobbyist/fetishist like I mentioned above). This is how members get all these whacked out ideas about how females really act, think, walk, dress, etc. There is no reality check because they are only talking to other trans/CDs and never venturing outside of those venues. I find those all those events really boring and can't understand how standing around with a bunch of CDs is entertaining at all. I don't share any interests with the vast majority of CDs and trans people I have met. Hanging out with them would make no sense at all for me.

    If you're really trying to enhance your feminine presentation then you should be hanging out with women more, not just CDs. Members will spend all this money on fancy evening clothes and get makeovers just to attend some T event and never anywhere else. Instead, there are tons of other places that are good excuses to get all dolled up for that actually have entertainment value and not just somewhere to walk around cross-dressed.

    Back to the point of trans-centric vs trans friendly. A place doesn't have to be LGBT associated or identified to be trans friendly. It's really annoying when people start using the term "muggle" in the context in which they are referring. Perhaps people are trying to be cute when using the term but it ends up creating an automatic us vs them mentality. CDs and trans people do not have special gifts and abilities just because they are a CD/trans. The world of Harry Potter did not refer to people as muggles just because they did not understand wizards. So again, stop thinking that you have something innately unique about you and sets you apart from those who do not crossdress. It's a really stupid mentality and falsely creates a barrier with others in the world when there wasn't one in the first place because people just don't care.

  3. #28
    Silver Member Crissy 107's Avatar
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    Kayla, You sound angry, and why are you here hanging out with CD’s and Trans people?
    Crissy

  4. #29
    Senior Member Jean 103's Avatar
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    Crissy I think Kayla does get what I'm trying to say.

    I'm not mad or angry and I'm not saying that how anyone lives their life is wrong.

    It does sound harsh when you put it into words.

    I didn't expect that everyone would understand.

    Everyone is different and I'm no exception.

    I know that their are few that can follow my path. And quite frankly I wouldn't want anyone to.

    It is not easy and it will turn your life upside down. I wouldn't wish that on anyone.

    The fact is we are different.

    I have found that most people can tolerate and/or accept it if you give them a chance.

    I'm very much aware of the haters, and I have had to deal with them, but I'm not going to let them control my life.

    But this is just part of life, haters that is. Maybe someday there will be a world without hate.

    John Lennon wrote a song about this called Imagine

  5. #30
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    Kayla,
    Just a couple of points I'd like to pick up on , I admit going to social groups does have the overtones of your comments but like the forum it is sometimes the only way of keeping in touch with some good friends , maybe you were a little harsh with your comments .

    I do have respect for the general public , to me it's par for the course if you want to integrate totally in the RW . I've never gone along with the " Muggles " expression but I'm not sure if I agree with you on not being something a little special OK not unique but there will always be that element that sets us apart but in a good way . There's nothing we can do about our mix of traits but I feel people do find us intriguing , enigmatic if you like .

    Jean,
    I agree it can turn you life upsidedown , it takes time to find a balance and take out of your life the parts that upend it . Day by day I just move into a better place , I still feel the bottom line is belief in yourself .
    Last edited by Teresa; 09-19-2019 at 01:33 PM.

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