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Thread: Why Crossdressing

  1. #26
    Gold Member Alice Torn's Avatar
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    Jean Ann, I can relate to being my own girlfriend. I am super tall, and never had a tall lady interested much in me. My Alice is the girlfriend or wife i never had.
    IT TAKES A REAL DRESS TO WEAR A MAN.

  2. #27
    Yeah Ok like whatever Tracii G's Avatar
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    Alice I would think there are a lot of CDers that feel that way.
    Head Executive Chief of the Dept of Redundancy Dept.

  3. #28
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    I fully agree with Alice. Not only am I anamord with my self, I am the other woman.

  4. #29
    Gold Member Alice Torn's Avatar
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    I still hope I meet a GG that could be a good friend, though, and maybe more.
    IT TAKES A REAL DRESS TO WEAR A MAN.

  5. #30
    Aspiring Member Maid_Marion's Avatar
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    I look good in women's clothes as I have a petite hourglass figure. It is quite affirming to be able to buy clothes that fits really well right off the rack after decades of not being able to buy clothes that fit. I've walked into a men's store, asked if they had anything that would fit me, and left after receiving the expected answer.

    It is really fun to take advantage of the sales. I had $45 in awards cash from VS, so bought a floral satin PJ top for the coming cold weather. Not only was it discounted down to $4.50, but I got free panties and a $20 discount coupon to use next month!
    It is hard for me to use that much awards cash and take advantage of free shipping, so it makes sense to visit the store and make sure the sleeves are exactly the right length.

    Marion

  6. #31
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    I dress because I am able . The desire has always been there. It's only now that I'm able to do it freely without feelings of guilt.

  7. #32
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    There is no one reason, there are many, many different reasons why a man may crossdress. Some are transsexual and it eases feelings of GID, for some it is a fetish, for some it is a substitute for a wife or girlfriend, some because skirts are more physically comfortable than pants, for some it reminds them of the feelings of love and security they felt from their mother, and on and on.
    Last edited by Vickie_CDTV; 09-21-2019 at 12:56 AM.

  8. #33
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    I have often asked myself this question, and am no closer to an answer. Unlike many on here the gender ID thing does not come into it. I like to look stylish and elegant, and it is easier and more comfortable to achieve this in women's clothes. I have several times been told by women that I look better in womenswear than menswear. I do not venture into women's trousers. I have a few pairs but I don't wear them - I could argue that they are more comfortable than men's trousers as they are looser and have softer fabric, but that is not where I want to go. My own theory is that my mother was very stylish, never wore trousers, and my crossdressing - only in smart clothes - is a subconscious attempt to impress her even though she is no longer with us. She always admired my fingernails and I love shaping and painting them when I can get a few days in a row without having to show them in male mode. I get a buzz out of looking good in a dress and of being out in a dress that I know looks good on me but at home I don't bother with the wig or make up - it is about the clothes. I now have over 1000 skirts and over 1000 dresses and spend almost all my free time in dresses. I have never felt I was womanly or feminine - I just aspire to elegance. I am fortunate that I have a figure (with added boobs) and legs that suit dresses - perhaps it is that this figure and my legs (with added height in heels) are on show in womenswear but not in menswear, giving me that extra something. I have really stopped the self-analysis and now just get on with enjoying it - I get a lot of fun out of it and it harms no one. If it is not a problem there is no need to justify it, even to myself. Yes, I would have a lot more money if I stopped buying ?150 dresses but I am lucky I can afford this - and everyone indulges their hobbies - and for me it is probably something resembling a hobby. I am a happy person who does not get depressed and I wonder if being able to wear dresses almost as much as I want contributes to this.

  9. #34
    Member rhonda's Avatar
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    The Devil makes us do it 😊

  10. #35
    Platinum Member Teresa's Avatar
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    Jean,
    After fighting the battle of feeling and being told it was wrong , I'm now finally winning the battle of knowing it's right .

    Tracii,
    It takes time and some people are still fighting the battles , to totally believe in yourself is hard for a TG person .
    Last edited by Teresa; 09-21-2019 at 07:01 AM.
    The real me ,no going back.

  11. #36
    Gold Member alwayshave's Avatar
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    I didn't choose crossdressing, crossdressing chose me. Given that, I love the look and the feel of women's clothes. The tactile sensation of women's clothes is so different than men's.
    Please call me Jamie, I always_have crossdressed, I always will, "alwayshave".

  12. #37
    Exploring NEPA now Cheryl T's Avatar
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    For decades I tried to answer that question.
    I simply feel at ease, that this is how I was supposed to be.

    I no longer try to discover why, I simply enjoy being me.
    Can you see the REAL Me?

  13. #38
    Platinum Blonde member Ressie's Avatar
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    Wearing them is what makes me feel good. Buying them consists of trying too find something that I really want.

    It becomes more of a chore for me sometimes because what I'm looking for has to pass my criteria. Fit, style, price, desire to wear it, and it's a waste to buy something that's too similar to items I already have no matter how good of a deal it is. Also, my back starts to hurt while going thru racks of clothes.

    Searching for that one dress that will look great on my male body. Buyer's remorse doesn't make me feel good.
    "You're the only one to see the changes you take yourself through", Stevie Wonder

  14. #39
    Member jacques's Avatar
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    hello Jean Ann,
    I have dressed since I was about 8 years old and I still do not know why!
    I have learnt to stop asking why and just enjoy it!
    luv J

  15. #40
    Silver Member CynthiaD's Avatar
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    Sometimes it’s best not to overthink things. I just got off of two solid days in male mode and it feels incredibly good to get back to normal. Why? Who knows? Who cares? I just know in my heart that this is the right thing for me.

  16. #41
    Silver Member JenniferR771's Avatar
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    Good point.
    Wearing pretty clothes is a good feeling for me. Intense in my late teen years.
    Now, I think of my habit as a fetish. It faded out for a few years after I got married in 1972.
    Nowadays, I get a warm erotic feeling from dressing. And it is fun to shop for myself in my favorite thrift shop.
    I am slowly getting a bit better at putting an outfit together with matching shoes and purse. Maybe cute hair. Sometimes cute makeup. Skill and creativity are improving.
    Red Carpet Emmy awards, for sure--however, not many events call for a dress anymore. Women are dressing more and more masculine. Sigh--driving cars, not having babies, working jobs, wearing pants. Where will it end? Trying to imagine my wife wearing a suit and tie...

  17. #42
    Super Moderator char GG's Avatar
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    This is an interesting thread. One of the things that the newly informed SO's ask is "why?" From the responses here, many don't KNOW why. So the question remains unanswered and a mystery. Not saying it's right or wrong. If "I don't know why" is the answer, than so be it.

    Quote from JenniferR771: Women are dressing more and more masculine. Sigh--driving cars, not having babies, working jobs, wearing pants. Where will it end?
    Interesting observation, Jennifer. Women are more comfortable in knowing what THEY want from life and not what society thinks what they should want. (Kind of similar what CDers want from life, independence from old rules). To me, that is a good thing.
    Last edited by char GG; 09-21-2019 at 11:15 AM.

  18. #43
    Dandizette LilSissyStevie's Avatar
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    I've entertained several theories over the years. At one time I thought I was expressing my feminine side. Then I thought maybe I had a woman's mind in a male body. I even considered that I had some genetic or developmental (i.e., the hormonal wash theory) "defect" that caused me to have a female sexuality and that my strange sexual predilections were just an attempt to satisfy my female sexuality with the wrong equipment. But I eventually realized I don't really have a feminine side and I haven't a clue what a woman's mind is supposed to be. Other times I thought I was trying to emulate the kind of woman to which I was attracted - to be my own girlfriend, so to speak. Except that the women I'm attracted to in real life are the exact opposite of what I emulate. So I took the attitude of just enjoying it and not worrying about the "why" of it all since it all seemed unknowable. But I can only suppress the questions for so long before they come back to nag at me.

    Currently, the explanation that makes the most sense to me is emasculation trauma + sexual imprinting. To make a long story short, when I was little I suffered a lot of emotional abuse which included the constant questioning of my masculinity. I countered that with attempts at hyper masculinity but the anxiety of trying to maintain that facade would wear me down and I would lapse into fantasy about being a girl and I would actualize that by CDing. Being "feminine" (IOW, whatever was the opposite of masculinity) gave me a great sense of relief and serenity. When I reached puberty, a major window of sexual imprinting, I had tremendous anxiety about being able to relate to and perform with girls. I thought how much easier it would be to be one. I began to fantasize about being a girl sexually. The thought of being a male sexually was so anxiety producing that it became somewhat of a turn off. I could feel sexy imagining myself as a girl but not as a boy. When I learned about homosexuality, I thought that must be my problem. I must in denial about being gay. Trying to maintain the facade of straightness led me to fantasize about being an effeminate gay bottom for relief from that anxiety.

    The only thing that knowing this changes is that I don't feel that anxiety any more but the imprinted sexuality remains and I don't think it will ever go away as long as I have any libido left.

  19. #44
    A Woman Inside KarenSusan's Avatar
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    I have no answer for why I do it. I feel it is simply a cross I have to bear.


    Karen Sue

  20. #45
    I accept myself as is Gillian Gigs's Avatar
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    Asking why someone CD's is a valid question, which gets answered in a million ways by a million different people. Mine started off as an abuse/punishment at 4, and before puberty I was dressing for the thrill, excitement, sensual and tactile rush of wearing something that was not in the realm of my boy world. It was fun trying on my sisters and moms clothes when I was alone, and I was alone a lot from 11 onward. I continued this behaviour for several years, my first ejaculation was while I was dressed and realizing how pleasant this experience could be, it became almost impossible to stop. The two separate experiences became deeply intertwined quickly, which eventually lead to many years of self condemnation, and guilt. It has taken many years to get to were I am today, the road to self acceptance has been a long and winding trail. I can't change the past, but I can have a say in my own future. It is still enjoyable dressing today for many other reasons. Dah, if I didn't still enjoy dressing, I would have stopped by now... I think??

    Like others, I have questioned my sexuality, gender identity, mental make up, etc. I have come to realize that whether it be through imprinting, or hardwiring, I am who I am and I can't change what has happened. So I have moved on, accepting the past, my quirks and enjoy being me, after all it's only clothes, right!
    Last edited by Gillian Gigs; 09-21-2019 at 06:35 PM. Reason: grammer
    I like myself, regardless of the packaging that I may come in! It's what is on the inside of the package that counts!

  21. #46
    Platinum Member Angie G's Avatar
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    I really believe it's the girl in us wanting to get out. I often wanted to be a girl and have been dressing here and there for years
    Angie

  22. #47
    Aspiring Member Rayleen's Avatar
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    I do it because I feel its me and I live it every day and really fulfill my life.
    Wanting something is a fantasy which on a long time period clouds your mind and makes you think you need it.

    Rayleen

  23. #48
    Rural T Girl Teri Ray's Avatar
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    This has always been the $64,000 question. I have always had this desire and gone through all the emotional ups and downs associated with the desire. I have no clue what made me have the desire. The only thing I do know about my desire to crossdress is I have finally accepted that I have it and likely its not going away.
    Teri Ray Rural Idaho Girl.

  24. #49
    There's that smile! CarlaWestin's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by JenniferR771 View Post
    Wearing pretty clothes is a good feeling for me. Intense in my late teen years.
    Now, I think of my habit as a fetish. Nowadays, I get a warm erotic feeling from dressing. And it is fun to shop for myself in my favorite thrift shop.
    I am slowly getting a bit better at putting an outfit together with matching shoes and purse. Maybe cute hair. Sometimes cute makeup. Skill and creativity are improving.
    Jen, that's pretty much where I'm at. As you know, there's a whole euphoric activity with me becoming the woman of whatever fantasy I've been entertaining. And then the picture and videos shoot and process.

    Quote Originally Posted by JenniferR771 View Post
    Red Carpet Emmy awards, for sure--however, not many events call for a dress anymore. Women are dressing more and more masculine. Sigh--driving cars, not having babies, working jobs, wearing pants. Where will it end? Trying to imagine my wife wearing a suit and tie...
    Now, Honey. That's funny!

    To answer the why question, I my personal development, I was the youngest of five. Watching in curiosity all the experiences that my sisters were enjoying, (makeup, fashion, jewelry, fragrance, etc...) and wondering why I couldn't participate.
    And I was Mom's companion as she got ready for work in the morning. A beautiful process. She worked in an office and back in the sixties, that was a formal affair. She would get entirely ready except her dress (didn't want to get it wrinkled) and parade around
    getting us off to school wearing heels, stockings, panty girdle and bra with beautiful makeup and hair and all her jewelry. So, I decided early on to experience my version of womanhood while enjoying my maleness. Add an interest in bondage to all that and you
    have a broad spectrum personality.
    I've waited so long for this time. Makeup is so frustrating. Shaking hands and I look so old. This was a mistake.
    My new maid's outfit is cute. Sure fits tight.
    And then I step into the bedroom and in the mirror, I see a beautiful woman looking back at me.
    Smile, Honey! You look fabulous!

  25. #50
    Gold Member Alice Torn's Avatar
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    Sigh, here too Jennifer. It depresses me, when i see the wonderful fashions of yester decades. It seems like mostly CDers are keeping those great fashions going, now. Sigh

    [SIZE=1]- - - Updated - - -[/SIZE]

    LSS, I can sure relate to your post. My libido is almost entirely gone now, but the desire to dress is still strong.. However, i do not dress as often now, but think about it most of the time.

    [SIZE=1]- - - Updated - - -[/SIZE]

    KS, I feel the same way. I would rather have been a normal guy.

    [SIZE=1]- - - Updated - - -[/SIZE]

    Carla, i can relate. Dressing is like a forbidden oasis in a dull desert.
    IT TAKES A REAL DRESS TO WEAR A MAN.

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