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Thread: Questions about comming out to a friend, could use a GG's help.

  1. #26
    Member CayleeMarie's Avatar
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    Indeed you would... you have a very lovely presentation!

  2. #27
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    If you need the secret, keep the secret, but you look beautiful.
    Last edited by Di; 10-23-2019 at 06:44 AM. Reason: Picture removed

  3. #28
    AKA Lexi sometimes_miss's Avatar
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    The number of people that know a secret, in order for it to stay a secret?

    ONE.

    Maybe this GG friend will be ok with your secret but then - maybe not.
    and
    Once you tell her, there is nothing stopping her from telling her special friend. Then all bets are off, her friend has no obligation to you and the secret is out.
    and
    I made the mistake of telling one women in the church i was in, and she said she would not tell anyone.RIGHT! She told others.
    and
    Most women I know can't keep a secret. I'm sure some can but none I know can.
    Every woman that I've ever known, when faced with something either upsetting, disturbing, something they're confused about, or very interesting, will feel the need to talk it over with someone; often, their best friend, sister, whoever she trusts. But then that person will also feel the need to discuss it with someone. And then you wind up with this:
    https://youtu.be/IrNI1coLYJA?t=4

    And then you're out.

    So, the advice remains the same: Before telling a secret, consider the worst possible outcome. If you can accept that, then proceed.
    Some causes of crossdressing you've probably never even considered: My TG biography at:http://www.crossdressers.com/forums/...=1#post1490560
    There's an addendum at post # 82 on that thread, too. It's about a ten minute read.
    Why don't we understand our desire to dress, behave and feel like a girl? Because from childhood, boys are told that the worst possible thing we can be, is a sissy. This feeling is so ingrained into our psyche, that we will suppress any thoughts that connect us to being or wanting to be feminine, even to the point of creating separate personalities to assign those female feelings into.

  4. #29
    Junior Member Jessifox85's Avatar
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    Lexi, and everyone else who has weighed in. Thank you, seriously thank you for advising me, and just talking with me, I've come to accept and realize the pressure I'm under right now. From my wife, to my son, to my job. I'm reaching out from loneliness and anxiety, possibly some depression. But reverting into CDing more and expanding that realm has opened my mind so much. And it's also confusing. But what I need... is time. Time to figure out what I want out of life. And where I want to be. Again I appreciate all of you for your input and I will not be sharing it with anyone else (but you all of course!)
    Hugs!
    Jessie

  5. #30
    Junior Member frax24's Avatar
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    Jessi

    If those older women have been for you through your lowest darkest moments : reveal the news.

    But if they are not on the day to day with you socializing: keep it to yourself .

    It?s a slippery slope when they use your revealing secret in a verbal argument and you?ll wish to have never revealed anything about your dressing.

    Slowly and subtlety induce them about Cding topic to test the waters
    I wish you the best
    the boy became the girl>>>> frances

  6. #31
    Junior Member Jessifox85's Avatar
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    That's just the thing, now even though I've decided not to share with them, they care for me so much, I've been out of work for a few weeks now and they still call or text daily to check in. We still hang out about twice a week or so and we did that when we worked together. We share plenty of other secrets or mabey intimate things with each other, I mean not about anything sexual about each other, but one of them has discussed her and her husband's activities with me. The other, her relationship with a woman, that she asked me not to tell anyone(she's still anonymous here).

    So obviously, they care for me and know me very well (so they think!). And that's why I felt comfortable talking about it with at least one of them. If not both. And we all know it's hard to explain a friendship to strangers, especially in written words. But like I had said earlier I think it might just be best to give the topic and myself some time.

  7. #32
    Female Illusionist! docrobbysherry's Avatar
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    Jessi, if and when u do tell someone? Be sure not to confuse the word "sex" with "gender"!

    If u do that it may help with your explanation!
    U can't keep doing the same things over and over and expect to enjoy life to the max. When u try new things, even if they r out of your comfort zone, u may experience new excitement and growth that u never expected.

    Challenge yourself and pursue your passions! When your life clock runs out, you'll have few or NO REGRETS!

  8. #33
    Aspiring Member KymG's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by frax24 View Post
    Jessi

    If those older women have been for you through your lowest darkest moments : reveal the news.

    But if they are not on the day to day with you socializing: keep it to yourself .

    It?s a slippery slope when they use your revealing secret in a verbal argument and you?ll wish to have never revealed anything about your dressing.
    I think this is a great point, i couldn't agree more.

  9. #34
    Aspiring Member StevieTV's Avatar
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    I told a GG (my best friend at the time). She then told her friends. I was pissed but got over it. Since then she's moved across the country and started a family. I don't hear too much from her now. I know...some friend

  10. #35
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    There is one right answer that you can count on. I've been lucky in that I've lived in a lot of places and have been acceptedted for who I am. None of us who can provide a sure fire answer. My wife suggested that I should befriend (tell) one of our neighbors. She also outed me with a large number of friends. Some didn't know how to deal with it. I was always open which helped. I was in a position I couldn't be fired..

  11. #36
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    I have an amazing friend, we are extremely close and have been for a long time, never anything more than friends but we have been there for each other through some tough times and that makes a bond that is very tight, even with this level of closeness it took me a long time to feel confident enough to share my secret with her, I wanted her to know and I was convinced she would be okay and she is very okay with it, she is very supportive and very understanding, she has asked some obvious questions that she didn't understand about cross dressing but she has never been anything other than respectful and I trust her with my life so why not my most closely guarded secret

    I say all this because I was totally sure of her, we are very close and to be fair I know some of her secrets too, but even with all that it still took me some time to share, she asked why I didn't feel confident enough to share sooner but she understood when we discussed it, I think you need to know your audience quite well because as one other said, once a bell is rung you can't unring it

    I don't regret for one minute telling her, she is brilliant and we can have proper girly chats and it is a fun part of our relationship, she has never seen me dressed by the way, just knows that I do and what I wear, the good thing is sharing is wonderful, like on this forum, it is great to be able to be yourself but the down side is if you choose someone who doesn't quite see it the way you do

    Good luck with whatever you choose, we will be all interested to know ho you get on

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