So here I am in drab at a local mall running a few errands, when I happen to go by the Marshalls store located there. I hadn't been in there in a while, and on a whim, I decided to pop in.
I started by checking out their new selection of fall purses (my new passion, but nothing there that appealed to me), moved on to the shoe section (the selection there was pretty lame), and I finally ended up at the dresses. Again, pretty slim pickings in my size, but there was that ONE jumper-style dress that caught my eye...heavier, winter-weight material, gray with large checks, scoop neck, 3/4 length sleeves, and it looked to be below-the-knee - even for my 5'10" height. Heck, it even had pockets! Even better, it was on sale for $24.99. "Sold", I sez to myself...but here is where the fun begins.
As I said earlier, I was in drab and on home turf, so I didn't want to risk asking to try it on in the event that somebody I knew would spot me and have that create an awkward moment (Yeah! Murphy's Law and all that). Still, I'm a pretty good judge when it comes to women's clothing sizes at this point, and this one looked as if it would fit just fine. However, as I reach the checkout counter, I realize that this was actually meant to be a belted dress, but that this belt was no longer there. Being an experienced shopper, though, my gut reaction then was to ask for a discount to compensate for this missing piece. The cashier seemed to be O.K. in principle with this request and turned to her nearby manager for approval. He first offered to try to find a replacement from among some odds and ends in a bin under the counter, but this was to no avail. He then offered a $5 discount instead, which I gladly accepted (no problem - I have plenty of spare women's belts at home). So, after about 15 minutes of this back-and-forth at the cash involving a guy haggling over a woman's dress in full view of a line of increasingly impatient GG's forming behind him (Oh, the irony...LOL!), I was on my way...or so I thought.
Turns out that in all the confusion, both the manager and the cashier had forgotten to remove the security tag on the dress, a fact which was loudly brought to the attention of both myself and the entire store as I attempted my exit. I immediately turned back, only to find myself face-to face with an SA who had been hovering nearby. Now this SA was something special...an attractive, stylish, trim, blonde 40-something GG with her hair done up in an edgy bob. She was also wearing an animal print top, black leggings, and matching animal print booties with about a 2" heel. In other words, pretty "hip", and not your typical suburban soccer mom...or Marshalls employee either, for that matter.
This SA was very friendly, realized right away that I had been the victim of a mistake, and apologized profusely for the error. Best part was...as we were walking back to the checkout counter to fix the problem and she was pulling the dress out of its bag to find the errant security tag, I mentioned to her that the cash receipt was in it as well to prove that it was a legitimate purchase. Being "hip" as she was, she then gave me a flirty sideways glance along with a mischievous smile, and said, "Oh, that's alright...you don't look like the type of man who would be stealing a woman's dress". And here I am, dying inside, inwardly laughing and thinking to myself "If only you knew...maybe not stealing it, but wearing it...?"
) Of course, my public and equally smiley, deadpan response was "Good to know...", which she also chuckled at. Once that was out of the way, she continued on by praising me for my great taste in choosing this as a gift for the mysterious "her", commenting how nice it would look with black tights or leggings and pair of black tall boots, which I wholeheartedly agreed with (waaay ahead of you on that one, sweetheart
So yes, a different kind of "passing" I suppose, and a funny, uplifting kind of interaction with a GG SA on an otherwise boring and dreary Saturday afternoon.
. I might have told the SA that I'll be wearing the dress myself.
