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Thread: Facebook Fear question

  1. #1
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    Facebook Fear question

    I would like to visit FB sites of Trans girls, but I have a fear of doing so.

    I have a FB site as a guy. If I search under that site, do my searches appear to anyone else? I don't want to out myself. Please share your expertise with me. Others may also be interested.

  2. #2
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    Hi Jenny , That is the reason that I stay as far from facebook as I can !! >Orchid ..++..
    Having my ears triple pierced is AWESOME, ~~......

    I can explain it to you, But I can't comprehend it for you !

    If at first you don't succeed, Then Skydiving isn't for you.

    Be careful what you wish for, Once you ring a bell , you just can't Un-Ring it !! !!

  3. #3
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    Start a girl FB page of your own maybe?
    What exactly are you afraid of ?

  4. #4
    Silver Member Aunt Kelly's Avatar
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    Yes. Facebook's entire business model is all about selling what they know about to anyone who will pay. To that end, they collect everything they can about you. Depending on your privacy settings, and on virtually every action you take, at least some of that is visible to others
    Get another email account (not Gmail) and set up a new FB account for your feminine persona. Learn about FB's privacy settings and adjust according to your comfort level. Do _nothing_ that will tie one persona to the other
    No common friends
    Don't join the same groups. Ignore friend requests that might have the most tenuous ties to the other account. Use a different browser. Once you have the account established, consider using a VPN (creating an account using a vpn will flag your activity and make it harder to establish that new account). Above all, pay attention to who and where you are.

  5. #5
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    Great tips Kelly I agree.
    I use a different email and browser for my girl FB page.
    I also keep everything all girl all the time so there is no connection to my other page.
    One thing to assure there is no bleed over have your girl page block your guy page.
    Do not friend anyone you know in guy mode.

  6. #6
    Member Dee Baker's Avatar
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    I use Mozilla Firefox (web browser). They recently launched (Facebook Container). You might want to consider this.

    Facebook Container.jpg
    CD Life

  7. #7
    Weirdest woman ever! docrobbysherry's Avatar
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    U will need another email address to open a Jenny FB Page. It's best if u use a different server, too.

    I've had 2 FB pages for 20 years. But, I NEVER visit one from the other. And, I don't have any of the same FRIENDS on both Pages!

    I have LOTS of issues with FB. But, no problems with being outed!
    U can't keep doing the same things over and over and expect to enjoy life to the max. When u try new things, even if they r out of your comfort zone, u may experience new excitement and growth that u never expected.

    Challenge yourself and pursue your passions! When your life clock runs out, you'll have few or NO REGRETS!

  8. #8
    Senior Member Pumped's Avatar
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    If I wanted to keep my CD'ing "top secret" I would get a second computer for just my CD'ing life and not use it for my male side. Never log on to your personal, "male" email on your CD'ing laptop, and vice versa. Web sites have a way or dropping cookies that can connect you in more ways than you can imagine!

  9. #9
    Aspiring Shopaholic BTWimRobin's Avatar
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    A couple of other things to try are to set your browser to delete your history and to delete cookies whe you close your session. I did this when my wife started seeing ads for Lane Bryant on her computer.

    If you really want to go in stealth mode you really need seperate ISP addresses, and separate devices.
    - Robin


    Because life is too short not to.

  10. #10
    Aspiring Member Karmen's Avatar
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    If you have 2 computers or computer and a smart phone, use one device only as a girl. New FB account for a girl and don't use your guy accounts on that device. That should be enough. If you have separate internet connections (home internet line on computer and data plan on phone), it's even better. You shouldn't have any problems.
    Also watch out on sites as Amazon and ebay what you buy. They send their commercial suggestions regarding on your searches and purchases what to buy for a long time after you bought something. I have 2. account for any girl purchases also.

  11. #11
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    All of my Susan stuff is on this laptop apart from my clothes inventory which is on a desktop I do not link to the internet. I only have a FB as Susan. I have not and will never buy from Amazon because of the lack of a proper tax contribution in the UK and do not buy anything over the internet - not just clothes - I don't buy anything at all. I use shops because if someone doesn't we soon won't have any. Despite this I occasionally get plugs for womenswear on my male computer. I have even had these on my work laptop which really is used only for work. I have a Susan and a male account on gmail and I suspect that either this or the IP address or a combination of these is to blame. I blame Google. I have started using Duck Duck Go for searches as is does not track your sites and I have had no problems since. I don't want a male Facebook account anyway but I am very suspicious that it would find a way of connecting the two. A GG friend whom I met as Susan but have since met mainly as a male obviously knows both and she has recently used my male name on the Susan email so I think a diplomatic word might be needed.

  12. #12
    Gold Member Alice Torn's Avatar
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    I had an Alice FB account, and a guy FB account.. I can see that things bled over, and i am sure i have lost some friends because of it. i finally blocked all the people who I knew would be shocked, and deactivated my Alice account.
    IT TAKES A REAL DRESS TO WEAR A MAN.

  13. #13
    Member April Rose's Avatar
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    I thought I had figured out a way to have a separate account as April on Facebook. Before I had even finished the registration process it popped up with a coworker as a friend suggestion. I immediately realized I didn't have the skills to keep Facebook's aggressive tentacles from doing things their way ,rather than mine, so I shut the process down. I still haven't been able to get rid of the page completely. They don't make it easy.

    The chilling thing is, I never had a Facebook account as my guy self. My wife has one, but she has no connection to my former coworkers. I don't think my wife's account was even active when I was still working. I do still have an account on LinkedIn. Facebook is always trying to get me to connect through there. I don't know where else they would have gotten the coworker information unless it was off the computer which I share with my wife.

    I have started using Firefox as my main browser because I can erase my history with 2 clicks after every session.

    IN my opinion, Facebook, Google and Amazon should all be broken up. They all act together like one gigantic megalithic supertrust.
    I am a vessel of the goddess. Let me express my calling to a feminine life through nurturing love and relatedness.

  14. #14
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    Good info here. Thanks. A long time ago I decided against opening a Facebook account. My wife has a FB account. If there is anything I should know about she calls me over to read and sometimes I make an entry acknowledging that it is I, not her, making the entry. Traci (33) asks "What are you exactly afraid of?" It's really simple. There are a lot of ill informed and prejudice people out there among friends and relatives and neighbors who would decide to shun anyone and spread gossip. I don't think my wife would appreciate it if my cross dressing were to become neighborhood gossip.

    What I have learned in life is there are people out there who like to figure out how to do something, whether or not it is ever applied. Given all the tech people FB and others are employing I am sure if there is a way to delve into peoples' lives to make a penny or a buck those companies will do it. I use Firefox. My wife uses Internet Explorer. There is nothing safe. Even on this site I have my doubts. I use a gmail account. My account is a sentence. Go try to run a program to figure it out. I doubt a computer hacker will try to break it. Yet, on occasion I have gotten junk emails on this Crossdressers.com account. All I do is read the notice I get that someone has left a message.. No outgoing mail. Yet, I have gotten junk mail on an account with a long sentence? So I wonder if someone has hacked Crossdressers.com. It's all a game for some with potentially bad consequences for others.

    So much for a Sunday morning rant. Time to go get the newspaper.
    Last edited by Stephanie47; 12-09-2019 at 10:26 AM. Reason: spelling

  15. #15
    Junior Member NicoleRenee's Avatar
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    Yes they can see but usually only if that friend has searched or joined that same group or even liked. You may out yourself but you are outing them also. I made my Nicole Facebook pace so there would be no worry. But I outed myself by telling Facebook friends what i did. Best feeling ever!

  16. #16
    Gold Member Helen_Highwater's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by April Rose View Post

    I have started using Firefox as my main browser because I can erase my history with 2 clicks after every session.
    April,

    You can set it to do it automatically;

    Under the Tools then Option menu item click the Privacy and Security tab on the left. There you have options to have it not remember History, and for Cookies and Site Data choose Keep until: I close Firefox.

    Avoids the danger of forgetting that one time when you really needed it.
    Who dares wears Get in, get out without being noticed

  17. #17
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    Firefox has enhanced tracking protection too so you don't get 99% of ads bleeding over.

  18. #18
    Seasoned Member Rhonda Darling's Avatar
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    Also watch for the trap of needing to provide additional information so you can prove you’re you if you get locked out or account is hijacked. DO NO USE THE SAME PHONE NUMBER OR ALTERNATE EMAIL ACCOUNT INFO FOR BOTH FEMME AND HOMME PAGES. They will link you. Also, use an easily remembered DOB. For Rhonda, I use same month and year as my actual birthday, but always list the 1st of the month as the day. Facebook and other programs excel at putting the pieces together and following the abundant clues we inadvertently leave.
    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
    Be all the woman that you can be!
    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
    . . . and now, On With The Show!

  19. #19
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    Great advice, ladies. FB still scares me. I never wanted to set up a Jenny FB, so that's easy. From your learned experiences, I will not go to the 'ladies' FB sites. Thanks, all!

  20. #20
    Senior Member Pumped's Avatar
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    I have a work laptop and a couple "home" computers. For years I never did my personal stuff on my work computer, and no work stuff on my home computer. Somewhere along I might have messed up because my work computer linked my personal stuff. I have given up and will do personal stuff on my work laptop, my company does not care and nobody has access to it so I gave up and don't worry about it any more. We have an outside IT company and they don't care either!

    I can shop for dresses on my home computer and they show of on my work computer the next day. I clear my internet history and they go away for a while. It is scary how everything gets connected!

    I have a Facebook page for my male side, but not for my girlie side, ain't gonna happen!

    Orwell's 1984 and big brother is here!
    Last edited by Pumped; 12-08-2019 at 11:24 PM.

  21. #21
    Gold Member Helen_Highwater's Avatar
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    I recently opened an account in a femme name on the Next online shop. I'd created a second user on my home PC so a separate login. Accessing the Next site as my second user the next site will greet me with "Hello Helen". If I use my main user profile it welcomes me as my male self.

    Now I had to give an address and contact number (same details for both) but there's no indication that they've linked the two accounts. After all, a husband and wife can legitimately have their own accounts and data protection being what it is to link the two would probably land them in deep water.

    It would be an interesting experiment to me if it was possible to create two separate FB accounts the same way. As long as you keep a distinct separation of who you friend and ensure there's no mutuality then it's possible the two could be kept separate. Any volunteers?
    Who dares wears Get in, get out without being noticed

  22. #22
    AKA Lexi sometimes_miss's Avatar
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    Using IE, Chrome, and Firefox: Past experience has shown that once I open facebook it apparently leaves a tracker which stays open and functioning as long as that browser is open, long after the facebook page has been closed. I'm not sure if it stays active after the browser is closed, because those browsers have background service programs running which stay active even after you shut down the browser's window. Often I have spotted these things because those programs will either update themselves without being opened, or will have some sort of glitch that shows that the browser remembers connection to a site in the past, despite my turning off cookies, history, passwords, and running adblock; I've also tried Tampermonkey, ghostery, adblock plus, and adguard, but nothing seems to work 100% other than changing computers.

    Perhaps a programmer who knows more about how those browser programs work will chime in on this, because I keep finding that they always leave some part of their program running all the time.

    For me, the only real solution is to run a completely different machine for when I'm here, or on any crossdresser activity pages including shopping, and NEVER when using a phone, because virtually all phone apps sneaky user agreements seem to require the user to agree to allowing the app to run whenever it wants to (FWIW, computer programs often do the same thing, such as by leaving the default answer to a question like, 'do you wish so allow {so and so program} to send information which will allow us to make the program work better' or something to that effect. The box is usually already checked off, so you have to actively opt out of doing so. And if that program freezes up? It might ask you if you want to 'contribute' the problem to their company so they can 'improve' how the program works, by sending information about what 'might have' caused it to freeze up or misbehave.

    In the fine print of most every user agreement, there are all sorts of sneaky things that we agree to, simply because we don't want to read all 11,857 pages of the user agreement. And even if we do try to read them, the wording is carefully arranged so that you will probably inadvertently agree to things you don't want them to do, anyway.

    Basically, if a company can collect any data on you, it will do so.
    Last edited by sometimes_miss; 12-09-2019 at 09:07 AM.
    Some causes of crossdressing you've probably never even considered: My TG biography at:http://www.crossdressers.com/forums/...=1#post1490560
    There's an addendum at post # 82 on that thread, too. It's about a ten minute read.
    Why don't we understand our desire to dress, behave and feel like a girl? Because from childhood, boys are told that the worst possible thing we can be, is a sissy. This feeling is so ingrained into our psyche, that we will suppress any thoughts that connect us to being or wanting to be feminine, even to the point of creating separate personalities to assign those female feelings into.

  23. #23
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    Firefox enhanced tracker protection blocks them really well sometimes miss.
    Mine has blocked 252 already today.

  24. #24
    Member Star01's Avatar
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    I would love to connect with other crossdressers on Facebook but I used to write and take photos for a couple of motorsports publications so my friends list is huge with an overabundance of red neck, testosterone and Jesus. Social media is so invasive nowadays with their tracking methods I'd be concerned that despite my best efforts I'd inadvertently out myself before I'm fully prepared to do so. I am a bit of a computer geek having built and maintained my own PC's for over twenty years so I'd like to feel like I'm covering all of the stealth bases. I run my systems on one of the Linux distributions and keep everything crossdresser related in an encrypted virtual drive with a secure memorized password. I've got something like over 5 gigs of photo and video history and a journal of my thoughts in the virtual drive. I also access the internet in "private window" mode so as not to leave anything in my cache. If I were to pass away unexpectedly my family would find my clothes but no record of this account or anything else related to my dressing. Too bad that clothes can't be hidden in an encrypted file, wouldn't that make our lives a lot easier?

    PS, I had one experience that freaked me out that I should caution everyone on as most of us aren't as proficient with our phones as the young folks are nowadays. I installed the Facebook app on a new cell phone and didn't think anything of it. The first time I took a photo with the new phone darned if the thing didn't automatically upload it to my Facebook account. I think everyone can see where I'm going with this, I don't need my lingerie pics on social media. After that happened I got sucked into one of those hours long loops of trying to figure out how to disable their upload feature as in addition to the app automatically uploading photos the notification alerts were beyond annoying. I finally ended up removing the facebook app and went back to using the browser on my phone instead of the app. Words of caution, if you create a stealth account and use your phone be careful. As someone who has dug into computers for decades I'm confident that I could have resolved my problems with their app but often that research is so time consuming that removing the app was my best option. Mileage may vary as they say.
    Last edited by Star01; 12-09-2019 at 10:52 AM.

  25. #25
    🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥 Patience's Avatar
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    If you want to expand your fem side's net presence, consider Twitter. Lots of CDers on it and the platform is less intrusive than fb. Also, it?s OK to have an account with an alias.
    ...throw off those chains of Reason and your prison disappears...

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