Been Depress Lately

[Glenda58]

I come to the forum and read what all of you are doing. I haven't been able to fully dress in over 3 months. I want to go out dressed like some of you do. Before I got remarried I was told not to for I wouldn't be able to go out again. Now 10 years later they were right.

I under dress everyday and wear women's jean and tops. But it's not the same. I have many outfits that just sit there. I miss going out. I uses to go out 2 to 3 times a week. I would go to church every Sunday. If I needed anything from the store I would dress. I would go to meetups with other girls. Once a week go out to dinner and/ or a show. I also would work around the house dress.

Now I wait to see if the wife will be gone for more than 3 hours so I can dress. She knows I dress and has found some of my things. I love her but I really would like to dress up and go out.

Just vending. I live thought you all.

[Alice Torn]

In America, the women rule.

[Micki_Finn]

In America, nobody forces you to get, or stay, married, and if women ruled, they would be getting paid the same as men, be respected the same as men, and wouldn’t have to listen to sexist hot takes.

[Majella St Gerard]

You are in control of your own life, you made the choices that put you in the situation that you are in.

[alwayshave]

Glenda, I feel your pain, I have not gone out since July. Thankfully I am going out this Saturday.

[Tracii G]

We all have to live with the choices we make.

[Crissy 107]

This is a tough crowd on here tonight, how about actually talking with your wife. Maybe you can make some sort of headway and get some consideration.

[docrobbysherry]

I agree with Crissy. Does your SO know how important being Glenda is to u?

If she does and still forbids it? It sounds like there's something missing in your marriage!

[Patience]

At the risk of knowing how Joan of Arc felt, maybe it would help if you found other things you are passionate about?

I mean, I can relate to that bottled-up feeling. My Halloween outing was my last break from an ongoing dry spell. Thing is, I find my urges to dress fluctuate, and through my many other interests and being busy with everything that has to with living, I can sort of push it out of my mind. I share this because you’re faced with two options: Act it out or hold it in. Out is obviously better, but if if you feel your situation dictates otherwise, you have to do what you have to do.

Fortunately, there’s more to all of us than just the fact we all like to look pretty. There are other things we’re passionate about. Focus on some other passion to take your mind off your urges or - even better - declare an official break and figure out a reward for yourself later, like a makeover and a new wig. Or both.

[Alice Torn]

Micki. Single women far outearn single men now, and over two thirds of college grads are females now, and same with grad school. Boys and men are ending their lives far more, Depression in men is off the charts now. I love women and prefer their company to most men. I admire some of them so much, that i sometimes dress as a lovely woman! Western nations offer women far more choices than men now. Nut, i am not against strong women, that are lovely, yet strong/

[Helen_Highwater]

Glenda,

Do you know what it is that your SO finds so awful about your CD'ing? Is it particularly focused on the idea of you going out? It's been written here before that SO's are frightened by the thought of facing the perceived social humiliation of being "The woman married to the husband who wears women's clothes".

How would she react if you said she can't wear trousers or jeans as trousers are men's wear? She can only wear dressers and skirts from now on.

The fact that she knows you still dress is an albeit small positive. It indicates that there's room for starting a conversation. Perhaps you can find out what she so dislikes about you dressing, what her fears are and also gives a chance for you to describe just what a toll not being able to dress is taking upon you. If she knew and still banned it then I would say that borders on cruelty.

[Kendra Sue]

This whole discussion has been so cogent for me. I am not afraid to admit I do take antidepressants.My wife and I had the talk years ago. She will soon be returning from N. C. from cancer treatment.We have had some rocky times recently and at this time I refuse to put our rebuilt relationship in jepordy by bringing up something that I sometimes do. Maybe sometime in the near future p

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Micki , I concur with what you said about women ruling. The trouble is men think with the left side of their brain.women with the right.

[Teresa]

Glenda,
I'm sorry to read your remarriage is still curtailing your dressing needs . I won't be as harsh as others but surely remarriage and dressing had to be compatible , I know I cannot give up the freedom I have now, any new relationship will have to take all of me on board .

[Jackiefl]

I said it before If you settle for less than you want you get less than you deserve!

[Stephanie47]

Glenda, I went back and read some of your early posts. You were out and about and exploring yourself. That's as far back as 2006. Then ten years ago you married a woman who knew you were a cross dresser because you told her before you married. No surprises. Then the downhill slide began. Your posts increasingly suggest she is not on board with your cross dressing, and, you have been driven into seclusion. You were 62 when you married her. Now 72 and locked away. I am not suggesting you should push your cross dressing into her face, but, to curtail all the activities you once enjoyed would not be in my playbook. It's one thing to have kept cross dressing a secret from prior and during a marriage to an unsuspecting woman, and, it's another thing to have told her.....and then end up in the closet. Time to get back to the activities you enjoy.

[Helen_Highwater]

Old joke;

A couple due to be soon married attend the practice ceremony. The bride is told;
Walk up the isle and join your groom at the altar. That'll be followed by the singing of a hymn.

Everyone knew she was desperate to get things right because for days after she was heard to be saying, "I'll, alter, him, I'll, alter, him, I'll, alter, him."


So as Stephanie says, It seems a bit more than a little unfair to have such conditions imposed post ceremony given you were open beforehand. If nothing was said by your SO before the big day then to do so afterwards seems unreasonable.

[BeingDarlene]

Glenda,

Count your blessings, girl. I haven't been able to fully dress and go out in over... well... ever. I understand where you're coming from, but you're still better off than some of us. So, it could be worse.

Darlene

[kimdl93]

How about talking seriously with your wife about your frustrations? Its not an easy thing to do, but repressing yourself to the point of depression doesn?t seem to be working well for you and probably affects your relationship with her as well.