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Thread: Buying/ Trying Clothes

  1. #26
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    Kay,
    So right , I've never had to walk away from a bad experience , I've had so much fun with SAs .

  2. #27
    Junior Member JennykBailey's Avatar
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    My daughter works for a well know womens clothing retailer. We asked her what they do if a man asks to try something on? She says they politely show them to the fitting rooms just like any other customer.

    Of course you could always have "the talk" with your wife, it solves do many problems x

  3. #28
    Senior Member Tracy Irving's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Tracii G View Post
    only one gave me a problem and that was Victoria's Secret and I will never go back in there ever again.
    Same here. I had a wonderful time trying on bras at a Victoria's Secret until they didn't have my size in a bra I was very interested in. The SA located my size at the next mall over. She called to confirm it was in stock and had them set it aside for me.

    When I went in to pick it up I asked to try it on and was immediately laughed by the woman helping me. Haven't been back.

  4. #29
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    Quote Originally Posted by Fullerton View Post
    The shop I'm thinking of has men's underground and the ladies on the ground (skirts/tops) and upper (lingerie). I'm after items from both ladies floors.
    Wow! Two different floors to master the courage to buy and try on clothing. The only recommendation I have is to do a lot of research on line as to the correct size for your body type, height and weight. I am tall (six foot). I have found I need to stay away from dresses that have a defined waist because those dresses are usually made for the average woman who is five foot six or so. Those dresses would end up showing a waist that looks akin to the way some old men yank their pants/waist up to their nipple line. Ugh! So, I choose dresses without a defined waist; wraps, sheaths, empire waists. I do agree using a cloth measuring tapes is very helpful. If you have measured the length from the nape of your neck to the hem of a dress that fits you nicely you can measure in store without trying on way too many dresses and rejecting them. Most on line retailers give a lot of information because, as with JC Penny, not all the dresses are available in stores. Some are on line only. However, many times with proper inventory control the on line site will list the stores where the dress and its size is available. That will minimize trying on too many dresses.

    Some stores do not allow taking garments from one floor to another in order to reduce shoplifting. Lingerie is fairly straight forward. You just have to adjust for the fact men and women are built differently. Most size charts for women's panties give hip measurements while guy's briefs are sized at the waist. Trial and error should give you the right fit for panties. Bra band size is fairly straight forward, but, then you have to be realistic as to what cup size is for you. The best time to shop for lingerie is around gift giving time; Christmas, Valentine's Day, Easter, Mother's Day when it comes to building up courage.

    One big issue for stealth buying is hiding the purchase and the delivery. Buying in person with cash is easy. Throw down the money and you're done. On line it comes down to using plastic. The family credit card may raise questions. All the local retailers sell gift cards for just about every clothing/department store. Figure out what the on line purchase will cost and buy the appropriate dollar/pound gift card. You may not use all the money on the card, but, the small overage can be used later. Many retailers offer drop offs to minimize "porch pirate" theft. I just ordered from Amazon and I was offered a locker at my local grocery store. Kohl's stores offer free Amazon return drop off sites. I suspect Kohl's figures, if it can get you into the store, you may buy something.

    I've shopped for myself and my wife. On several occasions I have gotten the 'stink eye' from a more mature (age wise, not intelligence) saleswoman who thinks men should not wear or even buy women's clothing. Most however have been helpful when it comes to sizing. I live in Washington State where the law prevents discrimination based on gender identity and gender expression. Most retailers know that and have trained their personnel appropriately. You may be able to establish a relationship with a particular sales person who will assist you every time you shop. One upscale retailer's sales personnel actually maintains a client list.

    The first time buying in person is apprehensive, but, it does get easier. And, since you and your wife are similar in size, if any neighbor or busy body encounters you, you can easily say it's for your wife. I was six foot and 175 pounds, and, my wife was five foot two and 110 pounds. No mistake when I shopped for her. Me? Well, it was frightening at first. Good luck.

  5. #30
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    Roberta makes it sound oh, so easy, doesn't she?

    That's because it is that easy. Although we have never met, she and I shop in the same Torrid store and her method and results are identical to mine. I don't mean to shame anyone, but if you have difficulty shopping in person, it's because you're being blocked by your own situation, not by the store.

  6. #31
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    Hi Fullerton, ASDA (Wal-Mart) is a great place to purchase clothes from. You can choose to collect from your local store so avoiding problems with home delivery. Also if you need to return items you can drop them off at the same store without any interaction with SA's. The only downside is the clothes aren't great quality, however they do a size 9 (UK) in shoes and also sell wide fitting.

  7. #32
    Junior Member Heather1's Avatar
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    pick out the women's clothes you think would fit in a few different sizes, go to the men's department and use the dressing room there. or if it's strictly a woes store call ahead and ask them if you can try items on. more than likely they will accommodate you, I've gone to strictly women's stores and have picked out items and have been asked if I need help, I have asked if I can try on and they started a room for me. I have gone into the shops underdressed and dressed. we fear ourselves more than others fear us. just don't try and squeeze into something that doesn't fit and you end up tearing it. the sales attendants have even zipped me up and down, they have asked me how it fits, if I like it, gone for a different size for me and gave me their opinion whether they liked it or not, and if it looked good on me or not. enjoy it

  8. #33
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    I email or called up a few stores and let them know I am a Male interested in buying a few items for myself in my case Bras, Panties, Slips Camisoles, Pantyhose and if I can try them on to get a comfortable fit and I really like Nylon and spandex full brief or Hi cut Panties. I got a few response and I hit the stores, at first it was hard but as I go more and more it got easier, now I know a few store Owners and I go try on things I like and I buy, that simple, good luck on your Journey. So far I shopped at Wolford, Nordstrom. Saks that are the big stores and twice at Victoria Secret, I like Triump, I go there a lot. and a few small Lingerie stores around Toronto. have to be a little brave and the Ladies will gladly help you out, it's a Business.
    Live Today as if it is your last day

  9. #34
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    As many have already mentioned, do as much research as you can into making sure what size female clothing fits you. I've lost count of the number of items I've ordered online thinking they'd fit only to find they're woefully too small. Shoulder width and sleeve length are my biggest challenges. As far as where to shop, I do it mostly online now but in the pre-internet days I braved places like Macys and Nordstrom. I even bought a matching leather skirt and jacket in a leather store once and just told the salespeople that I was getting them for my wife. Honestly, they don't care as long as they make a sale. Think of the number of people they deal with every day. Amazon Prime is great as they deliver to those dropboxes that are popping up everywhere. And returning the item is done the same way. eBay is great for getting cheap(er) stuff but returning can be a pain.

    Do you work somewhere where packages could be delivered? I get most of my orders delivered to work and if there are any questions from co-workers I just tell them my wife and I had problems with packages getting stolen from our doorstep.

  10. #35
    Platinum Blonde member Ressie's Avatar
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    My shopping fear is being seen by someone that knows me. Shopping in other towns takes that fear away. It was nearly 40 years ago I bought my first bra & panty set. That was over 1000 miles from my hometown!

    I take risks now days and shop in my area since it's very rare to run into anyone I know.
    "You're the only one to see the changes you take yourself through", Stevie Wonder

  11. #36
    Member HelpMe,Rhonda's Avatar
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    I did the 'womens' fitting room right before Christmas, I did ask, but the store was virtually empty as it was special 7 AM holiday opening. I do also kinda understand how annoying and creepy men can be so it's easy to see how GG could be uncomfortable seeing me in a more crowded time.

    It was indeed a situation where the 'womens' clothing was on a separate floor.

    The only issue for me was how I hadn't shopped in person in decades and how addicting it could get.

    Oh, and at the end the SA said something along the lines you read here all the time about being happy to take my money, when directing me to a register where he'd ring me up.
    Last edited by HelpMe,Rhonda; 01-06-2020 at 06:06 AM.

  12. #37
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    Quote Originally Posted by suzanne View Post
    Roberta makes it sound oh, so easy, doesn't she?

    That's because it is that easy. Although we have never met, she and I shop in the same Torrid store and her method and results are identical to mine. I don't mean to shame anyone, but if you have difficulty shopping in person, it's because you're being blocked by your own situation, not by the store.
    Thank you for that, I know I can come off rather blunt at times and I do remember when I was afraid to shop for women's clothing. When I think about the time I wasted and all of the opportunities I lost due to nothing more than my own unfounded fears it upsets me. And it upsets me even more me to see people making the exact same mistakes I made, we all made, over and over again.
    Last edited by Robertacd; 01-03-2020 at 01:30 PM.

  13. #38
    New Member Fullerton's Avatar
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    Thank you all for the advice, I’ll try and remember as much as I can when in the shop and know doubt full of nerves about people looking at and judging me.
    From checking measurements a 12 or 14 seems to be the size, but as you all pointed out each shop is different.

  14. #39
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    Roberta: like you, I remember how insurmountably hard it once seemed to walk into a dress shop and act like a regular customer. So I emphasize with those who still can't do it. The only message I have for them is this: Keep trying, because the end result is worth it.

  15. #40
    Silver Member Bobbi46's Avatar
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    Fullerton, easy to say this I know but try and relax as much as you can, yes it is a very nervous first time and I struck lucky I suppose, straight away I said it's for me (a skirt) I bought a top as well and went on my way, at home the top was too small, on going back the sales woman was wonderful helped me select another and then told me I could try it on there and then, after that first time I never looked back.
    If you can get over that first hurdle the rest of everything will seem so normal and you will wonder how and why you worried in the first place.
    Another thing to remember is despite the size of the shop the sales ladies at some time or other have sold things to men knowing it was for them, it will become second nature for you soon! good luck!!
    I started life a lost man now I am a found woman

  16. #41
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    I buy some clothes on-line and some in stores. I generally shop in stores which sell only women's clothes, so I have to use the female changing rooms. I've never had any problems. The staff in the stores are always helpful and friendly. I can remember years ago when I first started to shop, I was very nervous but after a while I got used to it. I'm glad I overcome my initial nervousness because clothes shopping is one of the great joys of life!
    I'm always a woman!

  17. #42
    Junior Member Stephanie_V's Avatar
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    Been a while since I posted, but I'll throw my two cents in. I remember when I first started buying Steffie Clothes (as I call it). It was terrifying. All kinds of thoughts ran through my head. But like everything, it gets easier.
    Now I'm comfortable doing in. If fact, picked up a nice blouse and sweater (Which I'm wearing now...so warm and soft). Not a care in the world when I was shopping for it.
    Just know your sizes, do a quick "hold it up to your body to see what it looks like" and toss it in the cart

  18. #43
    New Member Fullerton's Avatar
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    So I brought two tops today, I was a bag of nerves and waited until a dad and son left the sales rack (mix of women’s and children’s) before taking a look. While looking people walked past and no comment or looks and served at the till without issue. It’s been a great step forward.

    The Stilettos arrived today that I mail ordered, wow they feel good. It’s going to take some time to learn to walk in them.

  19. #44
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    Never had a problem buying clothes in drab. My money spends like anyone else?s so no problem. It takes courage and confidence to get what you want!

  20. #45
    Reality Check Krisi's Avatar
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    If you're already wearing your wife's clothes, you should know what size you wear.

    Since I don't normally walk around town wearing my boobs and hip and butt padding, trying clothes on in the store doesn't work for me. I buy what I think is the right size, take it home, get my boobs and butt on and try it on. If it fits, great. If it doesn't or if it doesn't look good on me, I return it for a refund.
    Krisi

  21. #46
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    When I shop in drab I am always already wearing at least knickers and tights and often a dress or top and a necklace (with a male jacket and trousers over this). When I go to the fitting room I add the bra and forms and also heels so that I get a good idea of how it looks in the mirror. Quite often I am asked to show the SA how it looks.

  22. #47
    Aspiring Member jacques's Avatar
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    hello Fullerton,

    I go shopping in guy mode and have worked out some strategies (assuming that you do not want to try the clothes on) -
    choose the day and time carefully to avoid bumping into friends.
    know your size - you might need to experiment a bit to find the right size (remember they do vary a bit from shop to shop)
    buy stretchy clothes
    know your preferred style of clothing and select shops that will be appropriate
    experiment - buy a few items in the sale so that you get to know the sizing of your preferred shops
    be polite and assertive at the shop counter; remember that the shop wants you money so why would the sales team not help you
    some of the larger supermarkets (like Tesco, ASDA...) sell clothes - just put you selected item in the trolley with your food and drink
    buy from from cheaper shops like Primark - they are always busy and the sales team rushed; but remember that stock turns over fast
    try charity shops for you jewelry

    hope this helps,
    Luv J

  23. #48
    Aspiring Member kayegirl's Avatar
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    Fullerton, not sure which part of the UK you are in, but I do most of my shopping either in Leeds city centre, lots of different shops, or at the main Boundary Mills outlet in Colne. I have shopped at both in full femme mode, and also in drab, and have never had a problem using for fitting rooms in either mode. As many have pointed out, don't be furtive or try to hide anything, just smile and own it. And if nothing else it is so much more fun than online shopping.

  24. #49
    Platinum Blonde member Ressie's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by jacques View Post
    buy stretchy clothes
    This is what I always look for after learning the hard way.
    "You're the only one to see the changes you take yourself through", Stevie Wonder

  25. #50
    Aspiring Member MargaretJ's Avatar
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    Some of the shops I go into don't have anyone monitoring the changing rooms, so I often select the thing I want to buy, put it in the hand basket, with a pair of male trousers or some other item on top, and try it on in the changing rooms. If it fits fine, and I return the male item to the rack.
    "She snuck up on me from behind. You'd think women would make more noise with those big high heels, but they don't, they've got this stealth thing going..."

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