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Thread: To Purge or not

  1. #26
    Silver Member Sandi Beech's Avatar
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    This is an expensive option but it does work. If there is a UPS store somewhere nearby your new town, you could rent a mailbox, then ship the boxes using UPS to the store before you move. I have left packages that I needed to pick up for a week so you can go get them when you have a chance. Regardless, you need to get the stash out of your house before things are getting packed up; otherwise, you may get caught. UPS store is where I get everything shipped without my wife becoming aware. It has worked quite well so far - 3 years. I guess I am devious.

    Sandi

  2. #27
    Gold Member Alice Torn's Avatar
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    Tracy Irving has a nice idea.

  3. #28
    Member HelpMe,Rhonda's Avatar
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    I held on to the shoes when I purged the one time, but only had like 3 outfits. I'd recommend keeping at least enough to make you happy to put on when you need to.

  4. #29
    -1.#QNaN Lydianne's Avatar
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    That Shakespeare piece is, though, very pertinent to TG. The daily struggle of suffering the slings and arrows of the 'outrageous misfortune'. Whether you ever think of the not-to-be as legitimate freedom, or whether it's more honourable to keep up the fight..

    - L.

  5. #30
    Junior Member Rebecca Cross Bracer's Avatar
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    Every time I do this it?s instant regret the first urge I get to dress again and realize I have nothing.

  6. #31
    Senior Member Angela Marie's Avatar
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    I've done it twice and after the last time I vowed never again. I'm finally at peace with myself and it's a great feeling.

  7. #32
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    There is a lot of good suggestions here, but what I don?t necessarily agree with is coming clean about your dressing before a relocation. Even if your wife would accept it, with all the stress involved, she really wouldn?t want to comprehend at this time.
    I?ve moved across the country, but at the time my SO was accepting so it was easy.

    If you must purge, donate, throw in the trash, the internet can help you slowly replenish.

  8. #33
    Life is more fun in heels Genifer Teal's Avatar
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    Ditto what everyone else said. No matter how you feel right now and no matter how long it takes things tend to change. It's likely you'll wish you had that stuff again.

  9. #34
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    Purging is one of those things that seldom ends well.

  10. #35
    Senior Member Read only Allison Chaynes's Avatar
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    This is pure genius. I am going to pick up some large speakers from a thrift store just for a similar purpose. Although it will probably involve hiding a junk food stash from my kids instead....

    Quote Originally Posted by Judy-Somthing View Post
    Get yourself a pair of large stereo speaker cabs with screw on backs and pack them.

    That's where I kept my stash for years!

    At least keep the things you know will be hard to replace.
    I purged over 100 dresses last month but kept all my wigs, forms, heels, and foundation garments knowing they would be hard to replace!
    Life is too short to be boring.

  11. #36
    Member SarahBJackson's Avatar
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    In 2014, I moved back to Michigan after breaking up with my ex-wife. I moved into my parents' house until I found a job. I donated 2 huge boxes of clothes to Goodwill in fears of getting found out while I was at my parents'. Later, after I found my own place, I threw away a garbage bag full of wigs since I didn't have any stuff anymore.

    I miss a lot of my shoes, wigs, and a few pieces of the clothes, as well as the makeup and the box it was in. Trust me, don't purge, box it up and wrap it in strong tape to prevent prying eyes to see the contents. The clothes may go away, but the feelings never do.

  12. #37
    Member Cacique82's Avatar
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    Noob here but I moved a few years back before I was out to my wife. I had a large collection of only lingerie at the time. In order to move all my stuff I packed it all in sacks inside a few smaller/mid-size boxes and labeled the boxes as something for me. I was moving a large collection of collectibles and labeled my outfit boxes as part of my collection. I also added an asterisk to the box words so I knew which was which. With the labeling, the friends/family helping us knew only I waned to move/open boxes for my collection. So I was able to move those freely and to where I wanted them-opening them only after we were done moving.

    Also purging- no way. I did it once in early 2000s. Lost a lot of good stuff that isn?t made anymore. Get creative, hopefully youll find a way to move it all. I still miss some things I let go.

  13. #38
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    Pick your favorite (and also your most expensive) items and mail them to yourself in a nondescript box or two. The return address should be from your current hometown but not yourself, as she may be less compelled to open the box if it comes from a third party. I have done what you describe several times and it only makes matters worse. Not to mention the cost of getting all new gear. This is a part of who you are and throwing things away is not going to change anything. Best of luck in your new home.

  14. #39
    Senior Member Asew's Avatar
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    Moving is a great time to get rid of stuff you don't really need. So go through your stash and weed out things that don't really fit or not so great. Same thing with all your other stuff. At a minimum keep one complete setup (outfit and jewerly and whatever else you use). Pack it in something only you would unpack. You will most likely regret a total purge. I hope you find an adequate solution and wish you the best on this journey.

  15. #40
    Silver Member giuseppina's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Judy-Somthing View Post
    Get yourself a pair of large stereo speaker cabs with screw on backs and pack them.

    That's where I kept my stash for years! ...
    Quote Originally Posted by Allison Chaynes View Post
    This is pure genius. I am going to pick up some large speakers from a thrift store just for a similar purpose. Although it will probably involve hiding a junk food stash from my kids instead....
    Devil's advocate: New large speaker cabinets and other items of a similar size could be bought at the new home's location and may therefore arouse interest.

    I like putting stuff in sealed boxes with a label unlikely to pique interest the best. Making a better job of sealing the boxes you don't want opened than the others may arouse interest as well.

    A metal box welded shut might work, but is likely to arouse suspicion, as well as damaging the items inside during the welding process.

  16. #41
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    If you can do not purge as someone that has purged many times I always regret it and re-buy

  17. #42
    I NEVER go bare-legged! Kimberly A.'s Avatar
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    Avi, I say either purge or have the talk with your wife and tell her about your CDing?.. It's your life and your decision to make and if you're afraid she's gonna find out the hard way by discovering your feminine attire, then think about what the best course of action would be.

    I mean, she would discover that you had been living a lie and you gotta ask yourself if you would really want that..... Just my 2 cents. LOL
    My YouTube channel: Kimberly A.

  18. #43
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    Assuming that your wife doesn't know you have several problems. A storage company is about the only solution until you get situated. You could hide it perhaps but it sounds like you have more than you can hide while moving. You could mail it to general delivery at the new destination (check with the post office). I don't know how much your wife and you are together. Will she want to go to town with you?

  19. #44
    Platinum Member Beverley Sims's Avatar
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    A box or plastic bags are a good disguise.

    Purge..... Never!
    Work on your elegance,
    and beauty will follow.

  20. #45
    New Member Kelly Pearson's Avatar
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    Been there and done this on many occasions, like so many have already said

  21. #46
    Platinum Member Angie G's Avatar
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    I needed to purge once before my wife knew I dressed lost some things I wish I had today. why not do as Rader suggests. you will be happy you did.
    Angie

  22. #47
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    purged so many times. wish I had not.

  23. #48
    Aspiring Member jacques's Avatar
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    hello Avi,
    what a horrible dilemma!
    you will regret it and make yourself very unhappy if you at least don't take at least some of your favourite clothes with you.
    luv J

  24. #49
    Junior Member Avi's Avatar
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    Well.... I have reduced my wardrobe to something I feel I can keep hidden during the move. This may be enough to keep me from experiencing complete withdraw. Lets hope.
    Avi

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