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Thread: So, it's just clothes, right?

  1. #26
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    Just clothes???
    I have never worn forms or chiclets except on rare occasions where women would probably do so also. I do admit to wearing foam cup falsies back in my teens, but many of the girls my age wore them too. I wear women's clothes the same as women do. I like the look of a woman. I wear a bra most days and yes my boobs do push against my top. I'm not full busted but have natural projection.

  2. #27
    dress to feel the energy Shely's Avatar
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    I don't know the answer to this question, but I have over 70 dresses right now and all most 1000 different dress pictures on flicker. But I do think there is much more than the clothes in this. the jewelry, nail polish, rings, wigs, makeup. I am in the pink fox for sure. But the clothes are the best part for sure.
    https://www.flickr.com/photos/lovethatdress/

  3. #28
    The 100th sheep GaleWarning's Avatar
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    A few years ago I attended an event in London which was also attended by at least one couple, where the husband was presenting as a female. I spoke with his SO and was floored by her comment. "He's still my husband, regardless of how he is dressed."

    Here's the link to my OP:
    https://www.crossdressers.com/forums...ent&highlight=
    Last edited by GaleWarning; 03-24-2020 at 07:52 PM. Reason: my memory was poor

  4. #29
    Aspiring Member TheHiddenMe's Avatar
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    For me, it's clothes, feeling, and image.

    For example, I have male lycra underwear that feel the same as some of my panties. As I often wear shapewear, no one is going to see my undies anyway, but I still wear panties, because if I'm going to present as a woman, I want to wear women's clothes.

    I wear padded bras (no inserts) because I want to see the image of breasts like a woman.

    I wear makeup and a wig because wearing a dress and nylons and heels with a male face and no makeup just feels wrong to me.

    I wear dresses because when I was about 7 I wanted to try one on and I've wanted to wear them ever since.

    For me, it's not just clothes. It's a complete image that I'm trying to obtain, both what I see and what I feel.

  5. #30
    🌕🌖🌗🌘🌑🌒🌓🌔🌕 Patience's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by DianeT View Post
    When are clothes not just clothes anymore?
    When they are unjust. In other words, when they do not do one justice.

    High heels can be particularly unjust.
    ...throw off those chains of Reason and your prison disappears...

  6. #31
    Gold Member Helen_Highwater's Avatar
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    My feelings on this are that the original question is not being asked in the correct context.

    "They're just clothes" is used in relation to how others, often SO's perceived there CD'ing partners. As others have said the person remains the same, who they were in drab is who they are dressed. While not entirely the same it's like seeing someone you've only ever seen in a suit and tie suddenly wearing shorts and a tee shirt. Same person, different persona.

  7. #32
    Aspiring Member mbmeen12's Avatar
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    Where do you draw the line in yourself?
    The first question, I looked very hard and thought to break the one word (line) down and my response "this is why I am on this site". I am of several peronas....mentally, sexually and physically (soon to start HRT to assist that sharpness of the line)... AND when I cross the "LINE" I am in my happy place.

    When are clothes not just clothes anymore?
    This question is simpler to answer and I feel complete when I am finishing my makeup.


    Great question from your GG and very thought provoking....
    HRT 8th week....

  8. #33
    Gold Member alwayshave's Avatar
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    Diane, It's not just the clothes, it is the entire package. I love women's clothes. The tactile feeling of satin, etc. However, when I look in the mirror, I want to see a woman. So yes it is more than just the clothes.
    Please call me Jamie, I always_have crossdressed, I always will, "alwayshave".

  9. #34
    Member KymG's Avatar
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    There is no way I could do just the clothes.
    I like, and or need, to see myself as a woman.
    Wig, make up, heels, boobs, the lot.
    I don't know why this is, I don't think too much about it these days.
    Its relaxing, energising, comforting, sometimes erotic , and feels fantastic.
    Sure beats drugs!

  10. #35
    3dxchat User JuliaGirl's Avatar
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    As Kym said, it's definitely not just "the clothes" for me.

    The clothes (and wig, makeup to the best of my ability, breastforms or chest plate, jewellery, nails) are merely a physical manifestation of what I feel on the inside sometimes. When Julia has to be allowed her time to be free. I stopped trying to figure it out 15 or 20 years ago now and accept that all of it .. feelings and outward appearance ... at time are needed for a bunch of reasons. To feel a mix of calm, relaxed, less angry, comfortable, sensual, erotic, and amazing as me. I feel good dressed because it makes me feel complete at the times when I need to.

    I'd honestly have no desire to wear women's clothing if it wasn't for something much more internal and deeper in me.
    Closeted for 45 years, so please take any advice I might offer with a massive dose of reality.
    Julia xo

  11. #36
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    IMHO it is more than just the clothes. At least for me. I am able to separate my male side from my female side, although I do not know if female side is the proper term. Male pattern baldness has set in which has lead to donning a wig. Rarely have I seen a bald woman, and, that includes sitting in various waiting area or next to my wife when she was undergoing chemotherapy infusions. My wife expressed a lot of her self identity is her hair. During chemotherapy she feared her hair would not grow back curly. She has pride in her curls. She also has pride in her greying locks. No dye jobs for her. I've read numerous articles and listened to many many stories about women and identity with hair, especially in the African-American community. It seems natural for a MtF crossdresser to want to have a womanly hair style. Of course, there are women who do have very short hair styles bordering on the masculine.

    Now, getting to the boobs. Obviously there are many women who are not very well endowed. There are some in my family. Nothing unfeminine about them at all. Femininity is more than outward appearances. Me, my inner self feels more comfortable having boobs. Sometimes I thought it may be part of deluding myself. I have never considered butt pads or hip pads. My wife has said for many decades that I have a nice ass. And great legs. No need to stroke my ego anymore than it is.

    I only wear dresses because that is how I feel. I have absolutely zero desire to wear any garments that seem to be co-opted from the men's side of the store. I see nothing at all worthy of jeans, although I see some very nice figures in jeans. However, usually what I see in jeans is not so appealing. It just like someone wearing jeans..sort of unisex for most. I've mentioned several times on this subject of seeing a dynamite young woman with long blond hair driving and operating a cement truck. She was adorned in steel toed boots, jeans, flannel shirt, safety vest, and hard hat....and gloves. Terrific smile. No mistaking her femininity which just rolled off her and flooded the street.

    For me, it is all the way with the clothes, one way or the other. No mixing of fashions. I'm all in whether it is from the female or male side of the closet. I do not bother with makeup other than some light lip color, although when I was younger I did mess around with full makeup, false eyelashes and nail polish. I can to realize I did not need all those adds on to feel comfortable in my skin.

    I personally think any male who says he just likes to wear women's clothing for its style and colors is deluding himself and refusing to accept he is more than a man in a dress.

  12. #37
    Always been a GIRL. Michelle1955's Avatar
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    I’m working on be 65 years old this year, been in my head since around 5 years old. It is the head, not a puberty thing that popped up. It started with a neighbor girl I played with we switched underwear/panties at 5 years old to see the difference between the two types. I do not remember the particulars we got spoked when her called our names and nearly got caught in her room.

    With that said to keep the gremlins from playing with my brain I got to be 24/7 panties. Some days got to have the boobs/bra on to settle the gemlins running around up stairs in my head.

    Sure I wear clothes,etc but that not a must have to satisfy the need. Do have the urge to go town at times, but working around in the yard / garden / barn / feedings the animals underdressed and my leggings, work pants, etc takes of 90% of my needs. I’m not a MIAD I am me, mostly female. Non-binary.

  13. #38
    Aspiring Member Maid_Marion's Avatar
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    I diet and exercise to have a weight at the 3 to 5 percentile for American women. And I have an hourglass figure! The waist is nine inches less than my hips. I've paid close attention to eating healthy since I was ten.

    Marion

  14. #39
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    Quote Originally Posted by KymG View Post
    There is no way I could do just the clothes.
    I like, and or need, to see myself as a woman.
    Wig, make up, heels, boobs, the lot.
    I don't know why this is, I don't think too much about it these days.
    Its relaxing, energising, comforting, sometimes erotic , and feels fantastic.
    Sure beats drugs!
    Agreed with all that.

  15. #40
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    Well I want to believe myself that it is just clothes, but for some reason I think it is more when it’s just physically impossible to have everything the SO has reproductively.
    Do I want it all, probably yes. Can I have it all, harsh reality is no.




    Pretty in Pink

  16. #41
    Reality Check Krisi's Avatar
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    I wear panties unless I'm going to the doctor. I wear women's jeans as a male. I don't think of this as "crossdressing". When I add the bra, boobs, hip and butt padding, wig and jewelry, I consider that "crossdressing". I know I'm not a woman and will never be a woman but I play the part of a woman the best I can.

    There are lot of members here, with a lot of different thoughts on this.
    Krisi

  17. #42
    Member DianeT's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Stephanie47 View Post
    No mistaking her femininity which just rolled off her and flooded the street.
    Stephanie, that lady seems to have made quite an impression. I like the idea that a woman dressed as a lumberjack can still ooze femininity, it confirms that it has nothing to do with the clothes (this in turn raises another question about CDing but it deserves a thread of its own).

  18. #43
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    It is not about the clothes. The clothes are a symbol. You can not transition to something that already exists. When I dress I'm being myself. I am the same person if I am dressed in female clothes or male clothes. Clothes don't make the person It is what's inside.

  19. #44
    Member Natalie5004's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by KymG View Post
    There is no way I could do just the clothes.
    I like, and or need, to see myself as a woman.
    Wig, make up, heels, boobs, the lot.
    I don't know why this is, I don't think too much about it these days.
    Its relaxing, energising, comforting, sometimes erotic , and feels fantastic.
    Sure beats drugs!
    I feel the same way. It just relaxes me. Kind of soothing for a while.

  20. #45
    Sort of a n00b Pixie_94's Avatar
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    No idea of it anymore, I feel a bit foreign to all this.

  21. #46
    Aspiring Member jacques's Avatar
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    hello Diane,
    My wife said "it's just clothes" to me when I came out to her. I am just the same person whatever I wear.
    I suppose we can justify each step of our cross-dressing journey: for me "wearing tights under my men's trousers keeps my legs warm in winter" and "the boobs let my dress hang properly"...
    But also it is more than the clothes - why do we agonize about why we can't resist the urge to cross-dress and where to hide our "stash"?
    Once we join this fantastic Crossderesser.com group it has gone beyond the clothes!
    luv J

  22. #47
    Member SaraLin's Avatar
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    To me, it they were JUST clothes, then I probably wouldn't be wearing them.

    "just clothes" are to keep me covered, to keep me warm, and to be socially acceptable (naked isn't cool - right?)
    "just clothes" are just that. Just. Clothes. My guy clothes are just clothes. T-shirts and jeans usually. They do the job. That's it.

    Now as to skirts, panties, bra, etc. - they are more than "just" clothes. They are symbolic of my inner feelings, my desires, and even sometimes my needs. The clothes aren't these things themselves. They are an outlet - a way to express myself.
    So no - for me there isn't some tipping point where it stops being "just clothes" and starts being more. It's always more.

    Of course, as always, "your mileage may vary"
    Last edited by SaraLin; 03-28-2020 at 05:54 AM. Reason: typo fix

  23. #48
    Member DianeT's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by alwayshave View Post
    Diane, It's not just the clothes, it is the entire package. I love women's clothes. The tactile feeling of satin, etc. However, when I look in the mirror, I want to see a woman. So yes it is more than just the clothes.
    Totally with you on every point.

    Quote Originally Posted by KymG View Post
    There is no way I could do just the clothes.
    I like, and or need, to see myself as a woman.
    Wig, make up, heels, boobs, the lot.
    I don't know why this is, I don't think too much about it these days.
    Its relaxing, energising, comforting, sometimes erotic , and feels fantastic.
    Sure beats drugs!
    Also totally with you.

    Quote Originally Posted by jacques View Post
    Once we join this fantastic Crossderesser.com group it has gone beyond the clothes!
    Case in point 🙂. Except maybe for MIAD members?


    Quote Originally Posted by SaraLin View Post
    Now as to skirts, panties, bra, etc. - they are more than "just" clothes. They are symbolic of my inner feelings, my desires, and even sometimes my needs. The clothes aren't these things themselves. They are an outlet - a way to express myself.
    Okay, the way you put it, for some reason resonates with me, it makes me reconsider one of my motivations for dressing. I can't sort it out for now, but thanks for sharing this.

    Quote Originally Posted by SaraLin View Post
    So no - for me there isn't some tipping point where it stops being "just clothes" and starts being more. It's always more.
    Never was for me either.
    Last edited by DianeT; 03-28-2020 at 06:48 AM. Reason: Minor choice of words

  24. #49
    Aspiring Member Angela1954's Avatar
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    This is an excellent thread; probably one of the best since I have joined. For me, and I assume many others, the comments here made me thing long and hard about the genesis of my dressing and what it represents. Over the years, especially since I resumed my dressing a few years ago, I have slowly come to grips with what the expression of my feminine self really represents. Now I am more sure than ever that Angela is not simply a male dressed as a woman; no offense to those for whom dressing is exactly that. She is who I am. Like all of us we exist on a continuum of male/female. She has however, to use a sports metaphor, crossed the 50 yard line.

  25. #50
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    Diane,
    Very good thread. After I came to terms with my gender identity, it became clear that I wear clothes (accessories, enhancements, etc) congruent with my gender - transgender near female. Several, like Teresa share similar approaches for their clothing preferences.

    To each his/her/their own.

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