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Thread: Nosy Neighbours........

  1. #1
    Junior Member AnntoAnn's Avatar
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    Nosy Neighbours........

    Just thought I would put down a few words regarding my lock-down and dressing. This is not rarely a complaint as we are in a fortunate position and others are not.

    We live in a cul-de-sac in a village, our house is at the end overlooked by another 5 houses surrounding a circular road. Since the lock-down most of the residents are permanently at home either working or retired. One of our neighbours knows of Ann (long story) and they are great. The remainder of the neighbours are unaware and I would like to keep it so. However one neighbour over the years has become very nosy and takes great pleasure in watching all the goings on in the cul-de-sac. The rest of the neighbours are fantastic. The nosy neighbours have taken upon themselves, to be the lock-down police! Slipping notes in peoples houses, for the slightest (in their opinion) infraction. We have received one explaining that we should not be receiving home deliveries for takeaways..... another one for sitting in our front garden talking to our next door neighbours..... We went for a walk around the village this weekend and on our return the nosy neighbours where at their window giving us dirty looks. Their constant vigil means Ann cannot leave the house without raising the question of who was that visiting? The nosy neighbours have seen Ann come and go before and have asked me and the wife who is that visiting. We have said it was a relative and that seemed to satisfy them, but now of course we cannot have visitors! Ann is confined to the house and rear garden. I am so lucky to have a supportive wife and the space to dress. Others do not have this luxury and are probably frustrated at the lack of opportunity to dress.

    We have received another note "Just a reminder that your unnecessary walk today is putting others of this community at risk" my wife wants to go round an shove their note up their AR*?.
    “You only live once, but if you do it right, once is enough.”― Mae West

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  2. #2
    🌑🌘🌗🌖🌕🌔🌓🌒🌑 Patience's Avatar
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    With Ann or without, that's intolerable behavior. I certainly wouldn't confront them alone, as they'll just get on your case even more.

    If you have a problem, others might too. Maybe you could consult your neighbors to see if they have similar concerns and then confront the nosy neighbors as a group in person or in writing with multiple people signing the same document.

    Then, there's the question of what would happen if you just came out to them. It's more than they deserve, I think, but if you foresee no bad consequence, you could just do it. Of course, coming out is a lot like squeezing toothpaste out of a tube - you can't really put it back, so consider your options carefully. I hope things work out.
    ...throw off those chains of Reason and your prison disappears...

  3. #3
    Banned Spammer
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    I am so lucky to not have a neighbor like that.
    They need to understand they don't have the right to tell you what to do.
    Who gave them the authority to run others lives?
    I would slip up at night and leave a note saying try minding your own business so I don't have to file a restraining order.
    Don't sign it and let them wonder who did it. Never admit to it too and if they ask say what are you crazy why would I do that?
    Or you could leave a note by the place they leave their notes saying mind your own business.
    Last edited by Tracii G; 04-12-2020 at 10:53 PM.

  4. #4
    Senior Member Pumped's Avatar
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    Maybe every time they send you a note of a supposed violation, send them back the rules you local government has posted on what is allowed or not with the related section high lighted.

  5. #5
    Senior Member Tracy Irving's Avatar
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    I don't know where you live, but the edict from the governor of our state encourages us to go outside and visit parks and get exercise. It says nothing about how to dress, crossdress or under dress.

  6. #6
    Senior Member Majella St Gerard's Avatar
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    You can only be pushed around if you allow it, ignore the busy bodies, who elected them hall monitor. I'd flip them the bird. As long as you're following the guidelines set by your local government tell them to kindly mind their own business. Sorry I'm blunt like that. What are they the Gestapo?

  7. #7
    Junior Member JennykBailey's Avatar
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    You could point out that coming to your door is an unnecessary journey, and the you don't want their potentially infected notes either.

  8. #8
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    Frankly I'd stand at the edge of their driveway and wait for them to come out of their house in order to explain what the "social distancing" rules are. In my state it is encouraged to take walks and keep active while maintaining distance. I would suggest since you live in a cul-de sac that all the neighbors get at the edge of their driveways, sit in lawn chairs, and, talk loudly to each other. I don't live in a cul-de-sac, but, the neighbors sit in lawn chairs at the edge of the driveways and just converse over the width of the street which is 32 feet. That exceeds the recommended distance by 26 feet.

  9. #9
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    Write them a note saying you bringing notes to my house risks both my health as well as yours. It is ridiculous they want to monitor you and are so worried they will come over to the potentially infected area to leave a note or reprimand you for what ever you are doing.

  10. #10
    Platinum Member Teresa's Avatar
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    Ann,
    I had a recent thread titled , " Don't give up on people !" through circumstances it was deleted , never should have happened .

    The point I made was when I first moved into my new home ( after my separation ) I took advantage of circumstances and told my neighbours that I was TG . The lady on my right and her daughter are really lovely , in fact she's told me she prefers me as Teresa . The couple across the road still do a little " ducking and diving " the husband is getting much better , the couple on my left also didn't really want to know but now I can't get away from them especially the wife . I made the decision that I was going to go full time in my new home town and I've stuck to it . It has paid off as I'm getting known around the estate and other people wave if they see me in my car . It's ironic that the lock down has separated us and yet brought us closer together .

    It could also be ironic in your case as the nosy neighbours are trying to stay safe but are just as likely to catch the virus as anyone . I also look at it in this way , sometimes nosy or difficult neighbours use it as a defence because they have something to hide .

    I wouldn't normally say this but if your wife is OK with you being out in the RW then maybe just flaunt it a little , they will realise how much it isolates them from everyone , my wife was the same way , the net closed in and isolated her so she decided seeing me was the easy way out .
    The real me ,no going back.

  11. #11
    Member DianeT's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by JennykBailey View Post
    You could point out that coming to your door is an unnecessary journey, and the you don't want their potentially infected notes either.
    Exactly.

  12. #12
    Aspiring Member jacques's Avatar
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    hello Ann,
    why not send your neighbour a note reminding them that the virus can be spread by touching letterboxes and reading unnecessary notes that are written with germ-ridden hands?
    Spread love not hate, and stay healthy!
    luv J

  13. #13
    Miss Judy Judy-Somthing's Avatar
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    They sound like great neighbors! LOL
    "This is ME" I am not CRAZY, I'm just a GUY who likes dresses!
    Since allot of men dress up in woman's clothing that makes it a manly thing to do!
    Much more fun than fishing.
    I do construction like house building and I love CD-ing, what's the difference?

  14. #14
    Senior Member NancySue's Avatar
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    Yes, there seems to be one in every neighborhood. Self appointed marshals. She sits on her front porch....watching. Everyone avoids her like the virus. Should you get trapped in a conversation, you?re stuck for some time. And...don?t disagree with her. I
    She has really stifled my going out. Being seen would not be good. So, avoidance avoidance is our mode.

  15. #15
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    I would bust them with the authorities for failing to take their own isolation seriously and by endangering your health by leaving notes and being on your property and porch. You have no idea about the sanitary status of the busybodies nor the notes. I wouldn't touch the notes. Or pick them up with tongs, redeposit them on their own porch, then disinfect the tongs.

    There's only one word to describe these folks, and it begins with an "A".

  16. #16
    Senior Member Allison Chaynes's Avatar
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    Great advice here... and I would add that you might look at your local ordinances, codes and laws, and inform them of all the ones they are violating. I have other thoughts on personal revenge but it's best to keep those to myself. I'll just say that the internet is your friend if you have their name and address.
    Life is too short to be boring.

  17. #17
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    I think your nosy neighbor needs to be put in their place.

    Easy come, easy go;
    Easy left me long ago...

  18. #18
    Silver Member giuseppina's Avatar
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    I would be inclined to have a solicitor write a letter threatening legal action in addition to the above suggestions.

    Giving the offender(s) a one finger salute may make things worse.
    Cheers
    Giuseppina

  19. #19
    The 100th sheep GaleWarning's Avatar
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    A naughty thought - Appear as Ann. They will assume you have an illegal visitor. When they write the obligatory note, then do as suggested above, including the information that Ann lives with you permanently.

    No more hiding. No more insufferable neighbours.
    to them!

  20. #20
    Silver Member JenniferR771's Avatar
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    Get a security cam. Show the pictures to your friends and neighbors.

  21. #21
    I ♥ pink! AndreaCalifCD's Avatar
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    I won't put what I was originally going to put... But you need to nip this in the bud. I suggest spending the money on a having a solicitor write a letter as well. Make sure they have to sign for it so you know they got it. Show you're not messing around.

  22. #22
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    Ann,

    Some people has nothing to do and are classless. Just ignore, and go on...

    By the way, I just looked @flicker/photos, you are one classy lady...

    Davina

  23. #23
    🌑🌘🌗🌖🌕🌔🌓🌒🌑 Patience's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by JeanTG View Post
    There's only one word to describe these folks, and it begins with an "A".
    I agree. Authoritarian might be putting it mildly, though.
    ...throw off those chains of Reason and your prison disappears...

  24. #24
    Junior Member AnntoAnn's Avatar
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    Wow... what a great response. Thank you all for some great advice. Some details I left out, we live in the UK and we do have CCTV. We have no interest in going to the authorities as they are just petty-mined individuals, with nothing better to do. I feel a bit sorry for them, as they are well ostracised from the rest of the village. The husband some times comes into the pub, but does not stay long. I think most of the antics are lead by his wife.......

    We and the rest of the neighbours are on a whats app page and keep in contact with whats going on. Every one has posted the notes they have received and just laugh it off. I do remember our first day in the house all those years ago and it was our first encounter with the Nosy Neighbours. His wife came over to us, as we were moving in an wanted to know how long we would be as the lorry delivering our house contents was in here words "parked too long" I replied "it will take as long as It takes" with that she just upped and left. When my wife asked who was that I just said "trouble" ...... another neighbour came out with hot tea and biscuits for the removal men, me and the wife and have been great friends ever since.

    Thanks once again for your thoughts
    Ann XX
    “You only live once, but if you do it right, once is enough.”― Mae West

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  25. #25
    Platinum Member Angie G's Avatar
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    I've known people that had to know everything going on. I tend to stay to my own I know very few people in the Neighbors.
    Angie

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