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Thread: Bored of crossdressing advice needed

  1. #26
    Silver Member Pumped's Avatar
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    I remember having a "bored with crossdressing" moment years ago. It lasted a week or two. I recall looking over my stash, thinking, "this is just stupid!" and just tossing it all. It wasn't a purge of guilt, or any other negative, I just lost the urge and figured I was over with it. A week later it all came crashing down again and I was out shopping for high heels and lingerie.

  2. #27
    Platinum Member kimdl93's Avatar
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    There is no reason to do something - anything - if you no longer enjoy the experience. Set cross dressing aside and pursue those things that do interest you. Perhaps the time will come when you once again enjoy dressing.

  3. #28
    Aspiring Member Fran Moore's Avatar
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    Megan, I agree with Miki on this, but it doesn't necessarily apply to you as we are all very different as we live our lives under the TG/CD rainbow. The ebb and flow of our feelings is all relative and I wouldn't put much emphasis on what is "normal" or not. Every one of us is in a different situation, have different opportunities and living environments. Do what feels right in your heart and head and don't limit yourself in your pursuit of happiness. Keep your options open and don't purge just because you are going through a "dormant" period. It's okay to to have a variety of hobbies and interests to feel complete and you don't have to focus on any one of them unless you feel the urge to do so~
    Transtronaut


    You must first find yourself before you can discover your future-

  4. #29
    Junior Member brit_cd's Avatar
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    New clothes sometimes does it 4 me. Or if u can find someone to trade pics or bideos with thats fun. I like to have someone give me a list of clothes or a a pic to see and match that as best i can.

  5. #30
    Junior Member Celee's Avatar
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    I feel the same way. I?ll have the urge to dress for a while then boom nothing for 3or4 months. Then the pink fog hits me with a vengeance.

  6. #31
    Silver Member CynthiaD's Avatar
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    No, this never happens to me. I have never dressed for the thrill of it. I dress because it's how I'm supposed to look. I sometimes get bored with my wardrobe though. When this happens, I buy a new dress.

  7. #32
    🌺T🌸R🌼A🌺N🌸S🌼V🌺E🌸S🌼T 🌺I🌸T🌼E🌺 Patience's Avatar
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    From your description of the situation, it seems you already understand that what you are feeling is temporary.

    So if it is just a question of what to do at low tide, so to speak, just let it be until the urge comes back organically. Any activity, no matter how fun, loses its luster when it is done out of a sense of obligation. Maybe that’s why you feel in a rut.

  8. #33
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    You got to explore.
    You have to take risk.
    You have to improve your look/sexiness/makeup skills/figure......

  9. #34
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    If you are bored with dressing why would you think it was something other than you?
    If you are bored then maybe you are boring like Sherry said.
    Its not dressing fault you have depression and no friends its you.

  10. #35
    Miss Judy Judy-Somthing's Avatar
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    I have to have something new in order to get in the mode to dress.
    The easiest way is a new dress.
    New wig helps or new makeup ideas.
    "This is ME" I am not CRAZY, I'm just a GUY who likes dresses!
    Since allot of men dress up in woman's clothing that makes it a manly thing to do!
    Much more fun than fishing.
    I do construction like house building and I love CD-ing, what's the difference?

  11. #36
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    Start another hobby.

    If you need to.buy another dress to continue crossdressing, maybe cross dressing has run its course with you.

    My wife doesn't need to buy a dress to.feel like a woman. You shouldn't have to either.

    [SIZE=1]- - - Updated - - -[/SIZE]

    Seems like some of you are trying to force it. And some of you are trying to get the OP to force it.

  12. #37
    Silver Member Micki_Finn's Avatar
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    I don’t think any of us are telling anyone to force anything. A lot of us just know the ennui of being dressed up at home and saying “what now?”

  13. #38
    Rachel Rachelakld's Avatar
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    I'm in the same situation - I've started practicing abseiling from the tree in my back yard (I have 2 big trees that need a trim, so one day I'll be skilled enough to take a chainsaw)
    See all my photos, read many stories of my outings and my early days at
    http://rachelsauckland.blogspot.co.nz

  14. #39
    Aspiring Member MonicaPVD's Avatar
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    Don't throw any of your stuff away. It will return.

  15. #40
    Miss Judy Judy-Somthing's Avatar
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    I guess some would be happy watching the same movie over and over, what would be the joy in seeing something new?
    "This is ME" I am not CRAZY, I'm just a GUY who likes dresses!
    Since allot of men dress up in woman's clothing that makes it a manly thing to do!
    Much more fun than fishing.
    I do construction like house building and I love CD-ing, what's the difference?

  16. #41
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    Hi Megan,

    I'm sorry you're feeling so bored. I have four comments, of which the last is the most important.

    First, as so many of us here have said, the need to crossdress can fluctuate. It may be due to "gender fluidity," or the waxing and waning of libido, or some other natural cycle; who knows? Whatever it is, it's entirely normal. Just "go with the flow," dress when you feel like it--or not, as the case may be. If you don't, don't worry; the urge will come back later.

    Second, as many like myself have also experienced, while crossdressing earlier in life can be sexually driven, later the urge can be more "gender driven," just for the pleasure of "feeling feminine." We may no longer get quite the same intensely sexual thrill as we slip into panties and a bra, or zip up a dress around us, that we used to have in our teens, for instance. I know this is true for me, and others have said the same. If so, that change is a normal part of life. Just enjoy crossdressing for whatever it means and feels like to you at any given time.

    Third, I recall an article in the old TV/TS Tapestry magazine from over thirty years ago (I doubt whether it's around any more) titled "The Tired Transvestite." The author discussed how some crossdressers, as they get older, no longer feel motivated to put so much effort into perfecting their feminine appearance: shaving arms and legs, arranging a wig, putting on makeup, and all the rest of it, every time they dress. Instead of a pleasure, it had become a chore.

    Well, why make a chore out of what used to be a joy? How many women take that much trouble over their appearance every day? Many would rather toss on some clothing, do a little minimal grooming, and enjoy the day.

    Speaking for myself, I'm very much into "minimal" crossdressing. Lots of times I only toss on panties, a little half slip and a skirt to wear around the house because it "feels nice." And comfortable. Yes, and slip on a pair of women's sandals as well. Even though I like bare feet too. Oh, and a pair of earrings. And change to a feminine wristwatch. Whatever feels good.

    I might get the urge to put on a bra, to feel more completely feminine. Then a blouse of course, so that I'm "fully dressed." But don't sweat it. Never let crossdressing be "spoiled" for you because it's become a chore. You're not "obliged" to put effort into "perfection." Just relax, and enjoy whatever aspects of crossdressing appeal to you.

    But now I come to my fourth and final comment. You said:

    Quote Originally Posted by Megan. View Post
    Thank you everyone for responding to my question but I [don't] want yo stop I just want to feel happy in myself I suffer badly with anxiety and depression and have no friends I think this may be a factor
    Well, I absolutely agree! It IS, without doubt the most important factor!

    You see, many of us feel that the urge to crossdress is something that "intrudes" on our lives. We're "driven" by that urge. Most of us have wished at some time that it would "go away," that we wouldn't be so addicted to the lure of crossdressing, that without it we could live so-called "normal" lives! (Though we humans are so diverse that as a woman of my acquaintance once remarked: "'Normal' is just a setting on the dryer!'") Some of us can end up feeling that "crossdressing in itself IS our "problem"!

    And many genetic males have discovered that they "feel more relaxed" when crossdressed. This doesn't necessarily mean they've "given up their maleness," which can have its pleasures also. But they recognize at times that it's relaxing to "lay down the burden"--or what feels like a "burden" to them--of "manhood," the duties and expectations that people (women and men alike) have of men in general--and revel in the joys and privileges of femininity instead, of being the "delicate," the "protected" sex. In other words, for some males crossdressing is a welcome part-time ESCAPE, a necessary break from some burdens of life they feel intolerable.

    But what you're telling us is different again, Megan. And I don't think anyone else here has remarked on it; at any rate, not in aI thIf suiably sympathetic fashion. (If they have, I apologize for missing it.) I think you've made it obvious that crossdressing has functioned as an escape for you too. Though not necessarily from the "burdens of manhood."Instead, it was from the burdens of ANXIETY AND DEPRESSION! THOSE are your "priority" problems! Crossdressing is only bothering you so much because you're finding less pleasure in it, so it "isn't working" for you as it used to be as an escape from those other, primary problems.

    I can only urge you to seek therapy, or support of any kind, for the problems that are truly plaguing your life. Anxiety. Depression. And very likely, an utterly unjustified lack of self esteem, of self confidence, or of encouragement and optimism that life can be better in the future. I don't know, but you might have been born with a systemic tendency toward anxiety and depression, which could well benefit from clinical help. You don't have to suffer.

    Or did you have had shitty parents, or other so-called "care"-givers, who were abusive, neglectful, or otherwise dysfunctional, and left you with these negative beliefs and feelings about yourself? Many people are messed up by the way they were raised, and left with distorted beliefs about Life--or about themselves--that they never discarded, because they never knew those beliefs were false in the first place.

    I was lucky, for which I've forever grateful. Those at least were things I never had to struggle with; though it's normal for any of us to feel "thoroughly insecure" at times in our lives. Only the crossdressing, that's all!--which I came to terms with by the time I was thirty. As for the rest, I wish the same joy in life, the same freedom from worry and despondency, the same optimism for the future, as I enjoyed myself.

    So do your best to deal with those problems first: of anxiety, of depression, of needless fears, of having no friends (and how to make friends), of thinking far less of yourself that you deserve, of underestimating the good things others are most likely thinking of you. You can get help doing this.

    What's the use of crossdressing, if the rest of your life isn't in place and functioning healthily? Take care of those problems, and crossdressing will fall naturally into its place. It doesn't have to be an "escape" from misery and negativity. It can rather be what it ought to be: an added joy in a healthy life.

    Good luck doing that,

    Marianne

  17. #42
    Reality Check Krisi's Avatar
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    The advantage of being "just" a crossdresser is that you can dress or not dress and it doesn't make a difference to anybody. If you were a male living as a female, you wouldn't have that choice.

    Maybe buying some new clothes would spark your desire again.
    Krisi

  18. #43
    Member JennyMay's Avatar
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    Like others have said, if you are feeling board with dressing then don't. Keep your clothes, the need (and it is a need) will come back when it comes back (and it will). In this strange Covid-19 world a lot of people are feeling stuck because they are. I'm sorry to hear about the anxiety and depression. I know a bit about that and that too will not be helped by the current world situation. I'm glad your hear on this site and I really wish you well.

    Jenny May
    Last edited by JennyMay; 05-26-2020 at 10:09 AM.

  19. #44
    Member manemami's Avatar
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    It always happens with me, but when i see some one wearing nice dress or by mistake i handle my old satin clothes then again i start dressing and keeps on happening till i found some other attraction. So keep it up it (cross dressing) will be there till end.

  20. #45
    Silver Member NancySue's Avatar
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    Since the ?get go?, I?ve never been bored dressing. There have been lulls, but followed by more intensity. The pink fog, to some degree, is with me almost always. Sometimes mild, sometimes intense. Sometimes in a boring meeting, the fog would roll in and I?d feel the butterflies.

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