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Thread: The challenge of " Dress up " time .

  1. #1
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    The challenge of " Dress up " time .

    I was posting a reply to Danille Dubois's thread when I posed her a question , I thought it might be an interesting question to ask other members .

    If you didn't have the restrictions and challenges of your " Dress up " time would you still want or need to to do it ?

    I know I've asked this question before :- If you had no restrictions how far would you truthfully like to go ?

  2. #2
    Danielle cdinmd206's Avatar
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    I am single and live by myself, so basically I have no restrictions to my Dress Up time.. I mainly wear female clothes inside the house but seldom put on makeup or wear a wig. I have no intentions of becoming a full time dresser and definitely not interested in a sex change. I love my female side but also love the male side also. I am greedy. I want the best of both worlds and to double my chances for a date on Saturrday night!!!!

  3. #3
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    If I had no restrictions, I would probably dress 2 to 3 times a week and go out a couple times a month. If I dressed more often I think it would become work.
    Sara

  4. #4
    Super Moderator Raychel's Avatar
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    I have no restrictions at all about when I dress,
    And I find that the dressing time is getting more seldom for now.
    not sure how long that will last, it does come in waves it seems.
    my sister's reply when I told her how I prefer to dress

    "Everyone has there thing, all that matters is that you are happy, love what you do and who you do it with"

  5. #5
    Senior Member GretchenM's Avatar
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    As I dress in private I would go to the same extent. But with me the desire is triggered by a shift in my gender sense and not a "conscious choice" to dress. The feeling must precede the act of changing my expression. Others are the other way around - the act creates the feeling. However, the possibility that full freedom would develop into more and longer term feelings that support the expression is a possibility.

    Brain plasticity acting in a different environment might very well result in a different outcome and behavior configuration. That is, "The more you do it the more your brain rewires itself to require you to do it more as a need." Your brain is always working toward the ideal configuration to produce the most comfortable ("happiest") condition in your life. But in doing that it also keeps the social standards of the culture as semi-constant factors so you don't go too far afield in your expression in comparison to what the society in which you live expects.

    The bottomline is there are very few constants in the equation because your brain will adapt to most anything because it has no knowledge of what is "right or wrong" in terms of rigid social standards. It just adapts and exposure to social standards forms a vague limit on how far you go with your behavior. Sort of like everybody is a shape shifter using expression to demonstrate to others different parts of your identity. Very complex, indeed, but most anything with a brain does that in one way or another. To the philosophers that is the essence of Free Will and the right and the ability to choose, whether the choices are complex or very simple such as deciding which piece of food to eat first or which way to go when faced with a barrier in the path, left or right, and no further consideration of the consequences of that choice. We often do that just like ants. But then we think about making that simple binary choice and implementing it with expressive style. Ants probably can't do that.

  6. #6
    I accept myself as is Gillian Gigs's Avatar
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    If you had no restrictions how far would you truthfully like to go? I am an underdressed, who loves lingerie and wear my lingerie all the time. That being said, when I am at home my habit is to wear skirts and hosiery very often. If there were no restrictions, I would wear skirts all the time, even out in public.
    I like myself, regardless of the packaging that I may come in! It's what is on the inside of the package that counts!

  7. #7
    Senior Member Pumped's Avatar
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    I worked out in my shop all day yesterday, my wife was planting flowers around the various planting beds. When I got done I went in, took a shower, had a Crown on the rocks and got my girl on. When my wife finally came in I was wearing a tight bright red bodycon dress, bra and forms, pantyhose, ('cause the dress was short!), white spike heel peep toe pumps I had just bought, pearl necklace and just a guy from the neck up. She came in and I was standing there all girly, getting dinner ready and she just said WOW! and went to take a shower. She came into our family room shortly wearing a tight little bodycon dress. We sat and ate dinner and then went to bed as we were both tired from the day.

    That is about as far as I want to take it. I have thought about wigs and makeup, but only with my wife's assistance, plus I would need to shave off my beard. Obviously I have little or no restrictions, other than my wife likes to have her "man" around too, that will be tonight. I might dress a bit, but it will be more endogenous, more male, but heels and skinny jeans and a t-shirt. I don't see myself ever going in public dressed, just too much to deal with to go that far. Too much old guy features to try to get girly.

    Do I feel the need to dress? YES! I NEED to dress a couple times week or more.

  8. #8
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    Gretchen,
    I found your second paragraph very interesting , the fact that the brain is searching for a comfortable state ( happiness ) or could you say stability and equilibrium ? The next sentence then raises the question how does the brain recognise a social balance ? The society we live is the only way we can learn right from wrong because as you say it has no inbuilt knowledege .

    I felt the question was an interesting one because most of us are driven at some point in our dressing evolution by the " Dare " factor , achieving that rush of emotions , from wearing someone elses's clothes , of the first shopping trip , not wanting to be caught and yet secretly you do , wondering if your underdressing had been noticed , the list goes on . Looking back it is a very strong driving force that I see now as building blocks in finding yourself or finding a comfortable place on the spectrum . I can see now it's not about becoming a total woman for some .

    Personally I feel if I'm seen and accepted enough as female that is a good as it will ever get any further steps won't change that for the people around me it will only settle any inbalance in my brain .

  9. #9
    Aspiring Member Star01's Avatar
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    I wonder that same thing or the way I posed it a few days if I was given an inch would I take a mile. I am in a dadt and spent years with our family of six at the time in a small house. In recent years it was one of our kids, her husband and kids in our lower level for five years. There has always been something over the years and when the dust settled it was dadt with not much alone time. Now I have some me time after my wife goes to bed but still have to be quiet due to the floor plan of our home.

    The fog has been thickening lately and I have no idea what I would do with total freedom to be me. The desire to dress is getting stronger each day after some family issues held it in check. My shopping opportunities are limited to non-existent until it's safe for us old people to mingle again.

    If I could I see my first step as an online shopping binge, wig, clothes, well thought out makeup purchased, shoes, and dresses. Would the freedom scratch my itch or would I want more and if so how far would I take it? In my case I want to explore that side of me more than anything but my fears and personality are holding me back and that is currently the main topic of therapy sessions.

    Would the freedom make me want more and how far would I take it. Do my daydreams when looking in the mirror mean anything or would being able to dress at will grow tiring? Or would it go in the other direction and lead to something more than crossdressing?

    Expectations and dreams can sometimes prove to be nothing more than fantasy and self delusion. Or they can turn out to be the best decision we ever made. I wish I knew the outcome now and could base my decision on that but life is rarely that easy.

    Great question, very thought provoking.

  10. #10
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    I never had any real restrictions beyond my own anxiety. I am pretty much full time now, and started my journey to transition.

    I guess my life is either your biggest dream or worst nightmare.
    Last edited by Robertacd; 05-17-2020 at 10:40 AM.

  11. #11
    Senior Member Jean 103's Avatar
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    Well I became Jean.

    I think of it now as I have grown up all over again.

    At first I was learning, making friends as well as a name for myself. Wearing mini skits and dresses.

    Now I dress more like my friends (GGs).

    Still I have developed my own style or just identified what I like and look good in.

    So the last time I remember wearing a dress up until last night. Was February 29, a dress I made from my friends wedding. One of the hardest days in my life.

    I also made her granddaughter's dress and altered some others.

    At the same time my landlord and closest friend at the time, was laying in the hospital. She passed the next day.

    How I dress is a reflection on how I feel. Last night I saw my boyfriend. We have been staying separated. I never stopped working, it's just my private life that's been shut down. Yes it is driving my boyfriend nuts that I have respecting this whole thing.

    Well I finally decided it is time. I put on a dress , for my boyfriend. No it didn't stay on long.

    As I was getting ready I'm sitting at my vanity a in my panties and matching bra almost finished with my makeup, just needed to do my lips.

    I rent a room in a house , have my own bathroom. The family just left, they have four big dogs.

    I hear the dogs , they are out front. The way the screen door is if you don't lock it they can open it.

    I look to see if they have returned, what I see is a guy with two dogs on leashes surrounded by the dogs.

    With no time I grab my big pink robe and take off running down the hall, coming out the door I have it on and tied. I'm hoping that it doesn't come untied as I get the dogs back in the house.

    I apologise to the man, the dogs weren't fighting they just wanted to play with their new friends.

    I just moved here a little over a month ago. He was ok with it all, and we exchanged names.

    Not the best way to meet your new neighbor, but I did leave a good impression, I think.

  12. #12
    Member MaryAnn1963's Avatar
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    I believe I would go full time. I really want to start electrolysis ( I hate shaving) and would love to have my nose taken down a size or two to help me look more feminine. When I'm dressed I just feel that everything is "right" . I don't want a sex change, I've grown accustomed to my "parts" and would not want to let them go, but I just feel more natural dressed as female and would prefer to stay that way.
    I guessed i'm just mixed up.

  13. #13
    Member Lea's Avatar
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    In the summer my wife leaves the heat and humidity and spends about three months with relatives in a cooler climate. During that time except when I go outside to visit my mom three times a week I am dressed.
    When the wife is back I dress maybe two to three times a month.
    If I did not have restrictions I would dress full time.

  14. #14
    Carole carhill2mn's Avatar
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    Many times when I was married I wondered what I would do if I did not have the constraints of a disapproving wife. Now I know. I have lived alone for 12 years and present as a woman about 90% of the time.
    Hugs, Carole

  15. #15
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    As you know, I have few restrictions in my life and as a result, I have taken considerable advantage of the freedom it affords me.

  16. #16
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    Yes, Teresa, I would still want to do it. If there were no PUBLIC restrictions and challenges, I'd be in femme full time .. too old for any surgeries including plastic for my nose.

  17. #17
    Weirdest woman ever! docrobbysherry's Avatar
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    U nailed me with this post, Teresa! When I first arrived here at CD.com 12 years ago, I was a closet dresser with a wife and 2 kids. Suddenly, all I could think about was dressing! I began under dressing, dressing in a store room at the office, dressing in my car, or in the middle of the nite!

    Then, I separated from my wife. There were 3 or 4 days every week when I could dress all I liked! I found dressing about 4 times a month was enuff. But, on occasion, I needed more!

    Then still a closet dresser, I began going out to T events around the country and to nearby T friendly venues. Yet, I still needed to dress a few times a month at home.

    About 5 years ago, I began copying and filming famous, female, characters. Then, stories starring Sherry as the featured female character(s). Since then, I have so many ideas and characters and stories to follow up on, I'm constantly working on and wearing outfits and costumes for these shoots!

    Your post made me suddenly realize my 20 year long need/compulsion to dress has vanished!
    Last edited by docrobbysherry; 05-17-2020 at 03:54 PM.
    U can't keep doing the same things over and over and expect to enjoy life to the max. When u try new things, even if they r out of your comfort zone, u may experience new excitement and growth that u never expected.

    Challenge yourself and pursue your passions! When your life clock runs out, you'll have few or NO REGRETS!

  18. #18
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    I live on my own and can dress as I wish. During lockdown I have only worn male clothes for a total of 8-9 hours for food shopping locally. I have a vast dress collection and am enjoying renewing my connection with some old dress friends. I don't wear make up or a wig except when out in public and not doing that during lockdown. I think ANYONE in a dress would be very conspicuous at present - in my short excursions I haven't seen any. I believe there are currently more men than women wearing skirts and dresses. So no such thing as dress up time. It is just dress up all the time.

  19. #19
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    Susan,
    I was using Danielles's " Dress up " expression from her thread , personally I'm Teresa everyday so I have makeup and my wig on no matter what I'm doing . As for who is wearing skirts and dresses the most , in my local supermarket I often see a TG in a skirt but then I had a word with a lady wearing a dress , OK she did stand out as the only GG wearing one at the time but I was wearing a denim skirt and wedges at the same time .

    Sherry ,
    I'm wondering what you would do if you had your time all over again ?

  20. #20
    Gold Member alwayshave's Avatar
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    I'm with Sara, I'd dress two to three times a week. I don't need to dress every day, but like to dress regularly.
    Please call me Jamie, I always_have crossdressed, I always will, "alwayshave".

  21. #21
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    No restrictions, I'd be pretty much as i am right now. I am already in women's clothes almost 100% of the time. Exceptions are work, where the job is dirty and ruggedness is essential, and out in public with my wife. With her, its still all female clothes except no dresses or skirts, so that would only change a little. Right now, my pants are yoga pants and my shoes are flats, wedges and sometimes even heels. The look comes across as androgynous.

  22. #22
    Aspiring Member DanielleDubois's Avatar
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    Theresa, I answered your questions in my original thread. Thanks for asking them.

    Danielle Dubois

  23. #23
    Aspiring Member Joni T's Avatar
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    My wife knows and is accepting and encouraging. I have no restrictions and can dress as freely as I want to or don't want to.
    Jon

  24. #24
    BEING YOUnique is AWESOME Princess Chantal's Avatar
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    Got no restrictions or challenges, dust and cobwebs gathered on my heels most often has to be wiped away in between crossdressing sessions.

  25. #25
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    In the past I have had ample time to be en femme 24/7. My wife would go to Chicago to visit our daughter for seven to ten days. Sometimes she went to Phoenix for a seven to eight days to visit her cousin. I took over the rack in the walk-in closet, lined my heels up at the foot of the bed. I went out for drives and strolls. There were days when I went from a nightgown to a dress back to a nightgown in the evening. She went when the fall or early spring when there was no outside work to be done. The only problem was social isolation. As an in-home dresser with the occasional drives and strolls there was no interaction. As someone who is over seventy there is not too much night life I would be drawn to. I do enjoy my male self, so I do not believe I would become a 24/7 365 days a year dresser. Sometimes I am amazed to read on this forum of prolong droughts between en femme sessions. When I was in that state of mind it drove me crazy.

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