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Thread: You look much better now

  1. #1
    Silver Member Bobbi46's Avatar
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    You look much better now

    My girlfriend and I share many things and the main thing is being able to talk about fashion in general, we talk about skirts, tops and lingerie and all sorts not to mention she has seen me several times now in just panties and a bra and forms.
    But having lost a whole pile of weight my appearance came into our conversations and she happenned to say that her daughter and the neighbours ( who have all seen me dressed) had politely and nicely mentioned to her that I looked "too top heavy". I said to her that I wished she had told me sooner I would have addressed the situation and she told me she did not want to sound critical or dominant and most of all did not want to upset me at all! I told her that would not have occurred and that I would have welcomed being told before.
    Looking in the mirror at a profile view of myself when I cam home to my house I saw what she meant, I was "top heavy" so researching what I would like to look like I kept it all to myself, buying new bras and smaller forms. I told her nothing until one day I turned up at her house in a new skirt and top. We embraced tightly and warmly and later I asked her "do I look better now" imediately she replied "YES so much better, I am very happy, are you too?" I told her it was taking a little while to get used to smaller boobs.
    Just this last week looking at myself in the mirror I did realise the "new me" was the way I should be, Plus my girlfriend likes the new style of my bras.
    It is quite different going out now but a more comfortable feeling as well.
    My girlfriend is an absolute jem, helping me with buying new tops and skirts online but even better going shopping with her to buy tops or skirts for myself Life recently has taken on a whole new meaning with my loving, extremely accepting girlfriend
    I started life a lost man now I am a found woman

  2. #2
    Platinum Member Crissy 107's Avatar
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    Hi Bobbi, We have been friends since about the time I got here. I have to say I have never seen you happier, what a difference a good woman can make. You deserve this to happen in your life and I could not be happier for you.
    Crissy

  3. #3
    Amanda countrygirl's Avatar
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    Congrats. If we can all be so lucky.
    Amanda

  4. #4
    Gold Member bridget thronton's Avatar
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    You two are lucky to have each otber

  5. #5
    Gold Member Helen_Highwater's Avatar
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    Bobbi,

    It's good to have such an honest friends. Mirrors are not always our greatest allies. Knowing you look better gives confidence and that makes us more relaxed in our own skin.

  6. #6
    Septuagenerian member Carole's Avatar
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    I've known a few real girls who have had breast reductions Bobbi, not as easily as yours tho', well done for listening to (de)constructive advice.................................
    Carole

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  7. #7
    Aspiring Shopaholic BTWimRobin's Avatar
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    Congrats on you new look.
    - Robin


    Because life is too short not to.

    It's ironic ... I finally found a group of guys I fit in with. Funny how they all enjoy being one of the girls.

    Wife: Why do you fold your panties? Me: I don't like my panties in a wad!

  8. #8
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    Bobbi,
    Every cloud has a silver lining , so glad you've found yours !

    The way she dealt with the situation was so sensitive and helpful to you , constructive criticism gave you the insight into how to correct your look , destructive criticism helps no one and only loses friends or people you thought were your friends .

  9. #9
    Silver Member Bobbi46's Avatar
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    Thank you all for such lovely replies, getting as far as I have was not a smooth ride and I lost friends along the way but those that stood by me are still my friends and of course along the way Iwon the wonderful friendship of a woman who is now my girlfriend and although she did not know I dressed initially she was so very accepting and coming to today she has given me wonderful advice to move forward.
    Yes I am very pleased with how I look now.
    Without my girlfriend would I have ploughed on through life thinking I looked alright when in all matter of fact I did not ? probably getting such advice from her was worth millions
    I started life a lost man now I am a found woman

  10. #10
    Senior Member GretchenM's Avatar
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    Once again, where in the world did you find this woman? I know they are ought there, but to receive such honest assessment of your appearance and then helping and supporting you correcting it is amazing. There is acceptance and then there is this which is light years beyond simple acceptance. Bobbi, you are so fortunate. You may have started a movement where there are a whole bunch of people looking into full length mirrors and seeing if they are top-heavy. We do have a tendency to do that. Boobs are important and defining, but triangles standing on one point just don't look very stable. Not that the bottom needs to be a lot bigger than the top but it is best to reach for proportioned curves.

  11. #11
    Junior Member EmilySmith's Avatar
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    Congrats and best wishes! Very happy for you, if just a little bit jealous.

  12. #12
    Platinum Member
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    You?re a lucky person. And, yes, balance is important.
    Remember always that you not only have the right to be an individual, you have an obligation to be one.

    Eleanor Roosevelt

  13. #13
    Senior Member Jean 103's Avatar
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    I'm happy for you.

    You are right, life is a lot different when you are at this level.

  14. #14
    Platinum Member
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    I will second with everybody else that your girlfriend is a gem, Keep her. As to boob size I do see some overly endowed women in the wild who would benefit from breast reduction surgery. I know two women who had such surgery for medical issues related to body stress/pain of overly large breasts. As to breast enhancements for cross dressers I have said many times the eye sees what the mind wants to see. That is the image in the mirror is distorted by the mind. I would recommend taking pictures of oneself and looking at them. Seeing oneself in print is a lot different than just looking in the mirror. In essence your girlfriend was telling you what she and others were seeing which was totally different than your mind was wanting to see.

  15. #15
    Member Jacqueline Vivaldi's Avatar
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    Bobbi- I am delighted that you got this honest and beneficial advice. I struggle with the results of the mirror and would benefit from someone really critical evaluating my looks. When I go out many casual remarks are made to me about how fantastic I look by GG and guys. Perhaps, I need to go to a professional for a reality check. I do use several different size breast form depending on the outfit that I am wearing.

  16. #16
    Female Illusionist! docrobbysherry's Avatar
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    It blows my mind have many T's get breast forms ASAP! Often, inappropriately over large. Then, r quite happy to appear male from the waist down!

    With commercial hip and butt pads so easy to use, inexpensive, and readily available? I just don't get it!?
    U can't keep doing the same things over and over and expect to enjoy life to the max. When u try new things, even if they r out of your comfort zone, u may experience new excitement and growth that u never expected.

    Challenge yourself and pursue your passions! When your life clock runs out, you'll have few or NO REGRETS!

  17. #17
    Silver Member Bobbi46's Avatar
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    Being so deeply involved with my girlfriend the breast/body ballance of my shape became more obvious as i lost weight and seeing me often in my underwear my girlfriend could see how top heavy I was getting, she is right of course and i am very greatful for her telling me this.
    I started life a lost man now I am a found woman

  18. #18
    Reality Check
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    As crossdressers, many of us are obsessed with boobs and in particular, big boobs. We start out with the largest forms we can find, often a "G" cup or larger. Most women are not so well endowed.

    On the other hand, most of us have wider chests and wider shoulders than genetic women and small forms don't look natural on us.

    It takes some experimentation, looking at self portraits and advice from others (when available) to end up with the best forms for our bodies. Forms that will look natural and be in proportion to our chests and shoulders.

    I have to add though, that if you don't pad your butt and hips, no breast forms will look natural. You need a hip measurement that's nearly equal to your bust measurement to pull of the natural female look.

    I started out with boobs that were a bit small and it was a comment by my wife that convinced me to go up a size. I'm glad I did and I think I have good feminine proportions now.
    Krisi

  19. #19
    Platinum Member alwayshave's Avatar
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    Bobbi, It's great that your girlfriend guided you to a new look.
    Please call me Jamie, I always_have crossdressed, I always will, "alwayshave".

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