Every Wednesday I go shopping at the local Wal-Mart.I am always dressed when I GoI've never had a problem with being read.anyways yesterday a lady that works for
the store stopped me and said I always like your style.She said you always look so nice.in the past she has complimented me when I wear heels saying how much she
loves them.I tahnked her for her kindness.It's just nice to be complimented for you effort.It made my day
Obviously, you're not one of those people who appear on "Caught At Wal-Mart" videos on Youtube. I have found "regulars" are noticed all the time in stores. Sometimes "regulars" are noticed for bad behavior or sloppy attired or unusual attire. Other "regulars" stand out for their good behavior, good grooming or nice attire. From your previous postings I'd say you're just a nice person and that is reflected through your presentation.
We tend to try harder because we have to. So it is always nice when someone notices that extra effort.
There's was a club in town that I only really went to once a month when they did a Drag Show. Last time I was there, probably February. The bartender said "I love your dress. You always look so nice." I thanked her, pointed at one of the Drag Queens and said " Well they do set the bar pretty high.".
Last edited by Robertacd; 07-16-2020 at 01:46 PM.
"I've never had a problem with being read."
Does that mean u ALWAYS pass or u NEVER pass, but it doesn't bother u, Michelle?
U can't keep doing the same things over and over and expect to enjoy life to the max. When u try new things, even if they r out of your comfort zone, u may experience new excitement and growth that u never expected.
Challenge yourself and pursue your passions! When your life clock runs out, you'll have few or NO REGRETS!
I pass all the time.I am out and about as a woman to many places and I just blend in.
We don't really know if we "pass". Just because nobody says anything doesn't mean we have passed. A clerk in a store complementing us on our outfit or shoes doesn't mean we have passed. We may blend in with the crowd well enough that nobody notices us but is that "passing"? And while we might fool people for a while, there are things like walking and talking that will give us away at some point.
Even if we go to a bar and some guy tries to pick us up, we don't know if he thinks we are a female or if he has a thing for crossdressers.
This is not to say that we shouldn't go out and do whatever it is we want to do and have fun, it's just to suggest being realistic.
Krisi
Its impossible to know what another person is thinking. I always presume I have will be read. Given that, I also accept compliments as being sincere. I don?t think people offer them just to be nice.
Remember always that you not only have the right to be an individual, you have an obligation to be one.
Eleanor Roosevelt
Passing has many meanings- only one of which is that people actually think you are a female. It also means that people tolerate, accept, respect, are ok with, or applaud your effort to pass. I honestly think that 99% of the time people can detect maleness, so I stopped worrying about it.
I gave up on the whole thing, and decided to just present as what I exactly am- a male who somehow feels entitled to and perfectly at ease in "women's" clothes. I get the same compliments, and enjoy them the same way!
I think we can tell more or less where someone is coming from by the tone and manner. A woman about my age said nothing for a long time, had to really think about it, finally said- sincerely, 'You look very pretty" I could tell she had reframed everything in her life to accommodate her sincere nature as a good person, and she thought that was the best and most helpful signal she could send to me that I was ok. There was a tiny hesitation as she chose the last word. Another time a young woman walking by me on the street exclaimed very loudly with evident pleasure 'You rock those heels!", to me and to her companions and to everyone around. She was with friends, and passing by, and I could feel her energy was troubled, a little, but not by me- I felt I was the example for her of the freedom she wanted. Her exclamation was her first step out. Another time a young woman appraised me quickly as we waited at the crosswalk for the signal, came around and faced me from the side, and said warmly and directly to me 'Nice skirt!'. it was a plain black medium length wool a-line skirt. I felt she was expressing warm support, choosing something she could say without any conflict within. That being supportive was more important than parsing my outfit or her own complex feelings. She was a tall and strong woman, and as such probably did not escape being criticized as a girl for her size. She would make a point to reach out to others suffering from gender expectations. The message was- "Hey- I respect your bid for freedom, and I'm with you. I don't quite yet get the look, but I'm open to it! ' Another young woman soliciting for Greenpeace literally yelled to me across the street -to come over and talk to her. She wanted to know- who are you, how did you come to this, I love how you look, etc. She basked in whatever I meant to her. It was not clear, but it had overtaken her.
We are all beautiful...!
Nice,
This has happened to me many times. They always start with you always _____.
As you see even though people don't say anything they do notice.
You don't need to and likely don't pass. Being consistent helps, is why I don't leave the house without makeup, as I never know who I might run into.
When I was a teenager (when every male teenager had his own ten year old car that he worked on himself), we judged each others cars in "yards". My car looks good at ten yards, yours looks good at twenty yards, etc.
I believe passing is pretty much the same. If you're walking down the street and people in the passing cars see you as a woman, that's good. That's ten yards.
Can you go into a store, pick up something and pay at the cashier and people see you as a woman? That's two or three yards and you're doing great.
I suspect very few of us could get dressed, go to a bar and slow dance with (sober) men and still pass as a woman. That would be the ultimate "passing".
Of course, some folks don't care and that's fine. My personal goal is to present and pass as a woman. To that end, I try to not interact with people unless absolutely necessary.
Krisi
This wasn't a post about passing it was just nice to be complimented.you take your time took look good and somebody noticed
Receiving a compliment always makes someone feel good. I have been fortunate enough to have received a fair number. One was by a nail tech whose station was next to the one of the woman who has done my nails for many years. She said that I was always so nicely dressed whenever I came in to have my nails done.
Hugs, Carole
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