Page 2 of 2 FirstFirst 12
Results 26 to 43 of 43

Thread: Should I celebrate or not ?

  1. #26
    Aspiring Shopaholic BTWimRobin's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2019
    Location
    Vermont
    Posts
    1,611
    When it's all said and done you'll do whatever is right for you.
    - Robin


    Because life is too short not to.

  2. #27
    Platinum Member Teresa's Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2013
    Location
    UK
    Posts
    11,665
    Alana,
    My wife or soon to be EX would just call me selfish but I do feel what some of us suffer to find ourselves is hard fought for , struggling against a lack of acceptance to beleive in yourself deserves some sort of celebration , I feel you're right we are worthy of it .

    Robin,
    Maybe I'm too soft but I'm not one to rub salt in the wounds .
    The real me ,no going back.

  3. #28
    Silver Member
    Join Date
    Jan 2016
    Location
    Orange County, California
    Posts
    2,943
    Teresa, you two have been in a paperless divorce since you moved out, and your sadness over that period of time has washed out, so sure! Celebrate a bit. As was suggested, take her out for dinner and drinks dressed as Teresa. She now needs to fully understand the "why" of the divorce. Enjoy which ever way you go.

  4. #29
    Platinum Member Teresa's Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2013
    Location
    UK
    Posts
    11,665
    Jenny ,
    Never going to happen she's seen me on just the one occasion back in February to bring me the marriage certificate to send with the application for the divorce . She threw her arms in the air when she walked in my front door and said , " Horrible , I can't deal with it !" afterwards she told me it's the worse thing she could have done , I told her it was the most sensible thing she had done , it had to happen at some point , at least she's seen me in reality and not in her imagination .
    The real me ,no going back.

  5. #30
    Aspiring Member AnnieMac's Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2013
    Location
    Midwest
    Posts
    578
    No..........

  6. #31
    Platinum Member Shelly Preston's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2005
    Location
    Scotland
    Posts
    15,963
    Teresa,

    Its not really a celebration, only the recurring date as the end of that chapter in your life.
    Shelly

    Super Moderator....How to tell your partner......Abbreviations

  7. #32
    Platinum Member Teresa's Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2013
    Location
    UK
    Posts
    11,665
    To all ,
    Many thanks for all your comments , I could however have a twist to this story , what if my wife holds a big celebration ? I could be very naughty but I know just the dress to wear for such an occasion , invited or not I could consider gatecrashing wearing it .
    The real me ,no going back.

  8. #33
    Crossdresser Taylor186's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jun 2009
    Location
    Midwest USA
    Posts
    1,040
    Sounds like pink fog thinking to me.

  9. #34
    Member SaraLin's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jun 2017
    Location
    Central Fla.
    Posts
    432
    Quote Originally Posted by Teresa View Post
    To all ,
    Many thanks for all your comments , I could however have a twist to this story , what if my wife holds a big celebration ? I could be very naughty but I know just the dress to wear for such an occasion , invited or not I could consider gatecrashing wearing it .
    why on earth would you want to do such a thing? We all know what kind of train wreck that would turn into. She'd lose it. You'd be the villain. Neither one of you would gain from it. Unless you're being really vindictive and want to upset or hurt her, I see no point in crashing her event.

    Now, IF she were accepting and open to the new you - that would maybe change things.
    But - if that were the case, she wouldn't be throwing a big celebration party in the first place, would she?

  10. #35
    Platinum Member Teresa's Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2013
    Location
    UK
    Posts
    11,665
    Sara,
    Quite right , I'm not that vindictive only joking , she may have a drink with her friends more for solace , who knows she might be relieved it's all over .
    The real me ,no going back.

  11. #36
    Silver Member
    Join Date
    Oct 2006
    Location
    Central NY
    Posts
    3,470
    How on earth is the demise of a 46 year commitment something to celebrate?

  12. #37
    Platinum Member Teresa's Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2013
    Location
    UK
    Posts
    11,665
    Vickie,
    It depends how happy or unhappy those 46 years were , we soldiered on bravely or doggedly for at least the last ten to fifteen years and to some we didn't have a bad marriage , some are suprised even now with our separation . You can't continue with that situation just to please others , we are both happier now , perhaps it was a mistake not to end it sooner .
    The real me ,no going back.

  13. #38
    Senior Member Robbin_Sinclair's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2012
    Location
    A Tropical Isle
    Posts
    1,235
    Hi Teresa - I actually dismissed my divorce proceedings for about a month, after I filed it. It was all personal. Nobody even knew. I had a very romantic notion of our marriage.

    Being one of those legal eagles you disparage**, I knew what to do. But, it was time to do it. Memories in life are incredibly callous, sometimes. I’ve actually been married three times in 70plus years. This one will last till I die, or will it?

    Conceivably, if I gave my wife and stepdaughter the whole dog and pony show of my crazy life, it might be too unbearable for them to continue. I could be back on my own again with Social Security and I might have to move to Mexico or Portugal for health care ... not the worst thing in the world, if I am healthy. Not likely but this is how I view life.

    For you, life will not be the same but nobody keeps friends or lovers just because of the passage of time. These people must be relevant to your life as it is now. Whether that will happen with the ex, only time will tell. It should be no big deal, either way.
    Take care. It will be fine. ❤️



    **Re expensive, legal scallawags. They are usually expensive only when the people themselves are greedy. My experience.
    Last edited by Robbin_Sinclair; 07-27-2020 at 09:45 AM.

  14. #39
    Platinum Member Teresa's Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2013
    Location
    UK
    Posts
    11,665
    Robin,
    I'm sure it won't be long before I'm still sommoned to help out with the grandsons along with the message to bring my tools , I doubt very much that piece of paper will change that aspect long term , leoprads don't change their spots ! I guess it's up to me if I change the ground rules . The important apsect is I'm only divorcing my wife not my children .
    The real me ,no going back.

  15. #40
    Member colleen ps's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2015
    Location
    Dartford, Kent, UK
    Posts
    170
    Teresa, the only thing you need to celebrate is the fact that you are finally who you need to be. You still have the kids, you still have the memories, both good and bad. you have new friends and probably still some of your old friends. As other have said, you were divorced the day you moved out! now it will just be another piece of paper. I have been reading your posts for a good few years now, and gone back in time to read your posts before i joined here. Its been a really long journey for you, but finally You have arrived at your true destination. Your happiness comes across so strong, it moves me more than i like to admit. It also make me realise how lucky i, and many others are and that acceptance from our partners is a gift. Who knows where you will journey to next! looking forward to reading about it for many years to come.

    Stay happy, and enjoy your new life. but dont stop reflecting on the old. It can only get better from now on.

    All the best.

    Colleen.
    Last edited by colleen ps; 07-28-2020 at 01:10 AM.

  16. #41
    Platinum Member Teresa's Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2013
    Location
    UK
    Posts
    11,665
    Colleen ,
    Many thanks for those kind words . All our situations are different , the fact you can look into previous posts can help or guide with your own situation and hopefully make the right choices and not make the same mistakes as others .

    I agree it's a gift to be able to share your needs with a wife /partner , in my case I feel the right decision was made obvioulsy after 46 years a painful one but more harm would have been done if we had tried to maintain a marriage . I accept it wasn't easy for my wife , I'm not sure which situation she would have been happier with , losing me to become a woman or losing me to another woman ?

    Like many I have plans but at the moment they are on hold because of the current situation , the bottom line at the moment is just to stay safe and healthy and pick up the pieces when it's all over .
    The real me ,no going back.

  17. #42
    Senior Member
    Join Date
    Feb 2012
    Location
    The South
    Posts
    1,678
    Dear Teresa,

    I don't come to this site much these days but when I do I always try to find Teresa's latest post. I have read most of your posts since you joined the site and watched the transformation of your life with great interest. It was a long and at times painful journey but you have arrived in a happier place. Celebrate by all means; perhaps a new outfit and a glass of wine on your terrace. But mostly enjoy what you have.

    Best wishes

    Consuelo

  18. #43
    Gold Member alwayshave's Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2011
    Location
    Washington, DC
    Posts
    7,938
    Teresa, It would seem that your divorce is a long time coming. However, I would not celebrate the divorce in view of your children. I hope all goes well on your court date.
    Please call me Jamie, I always_have crossdressed, I always will, "alwayshave".

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •  


Check out these other hot web properties:
Catholic Personals | Jewish Personals | Millionaire Personals | Unsigned Artists | Crossdressing Relationship
BBW Personals | Latino Personals | Black Personals | Crossdresser Chat | Crossdressing QA
Biker Personals | CD Relationship | Crossdressing Dating | FTM Relationship | Dating | TG Relationship


The crossdressing community is one that needs to stick together and continue to be there for each other for whatever one needs.
We are always trying to improve the forum to better serve the crossdresser in all of us.

Browse Crossdressers By State