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Thread: "That's too tight on you!"

  1. #26
    Aspiring Member Bea_'s Avatar
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    I got up this morning and decided to put on one of my newer purchases that she'd said was too tight when I first modeled it for her. I walked into the room where she was and she looked up and said "I like it". It's the same outfit that she kinda scowled at the first time. She could just be being nice this morning, but I truly think that this particular style is totally new for me and she's having to adjust her expectations.

    The jumper I'm wearing is definitely form fitting. But, I think her judgment of it looking too tight is much more from the fact that it's an outfit that you'd typically expect to see a waist and the projections of hips and breasts. I'm definitely straight from my armpits to my thighs. I wouldn't mind having a smaller man's waist, and I do have a little bit of AA action with the high beams constantly shining.

    Her reaction with the newer clothes was actually pretty much the same she had the first time she saw me in a dress. Now, she'll regularly compliment the dresses she likes.

    And to those who suggested taking photos, I'm hoping to get some taken soon. It's been a busy week.

  2. #27
    Administrator Di's Avatar
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    I remember when first being with Sherlyn she would be hurt if Idid not like something new she bought.
    Well I was not going to be saying oh that looks nice if I did not mean it. Whats the point really?
    I explained I love you and have your best interest at heart and would want honesty back if I bought something that for some reason did me no justice. So maybe that is the case here too and just giving you my experience.
    In my opinion you would want someone to be honest and not a cheerleader .
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  3. #28
    Aspiring Member Bea_'s Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Di View Post
    I remember when first being with Sherlyn she would be hurt if Idid not like something new she bought.
    Well I was not going to be saying oh that looks nice if I did not mean it. Whats the point really?
    I explained I love you and have your best interest at heart and would want honesty back if I bought something that for some reason did me no justice. So maybe that is the case here too and just giving you my experience.
    In my opinion you would want someone to be honest and not a cheerleader .
    I actually feel my wife is the same as you in that respect. She has been very diplomatic for the most part and I appreciate that fact. My post was not a complaint as much as an observation. We disagree about the fit. I'm OK with that. I think the outfit is cute. I wish she saw it as cute. She doesn't. But, she's still supportive and I appreciate her.

  4. #29
    Administrator Di's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Bea_ View Post
    I actually feel my wife is the same as you in that respect. She has been very diplomatic for the most part and I appreciate that fact. My post was not a complaint as much as an observation. We disagree about the fit. I'm OK with that. I think the outfit is cute. I wish she saw it as cute. She doesn't. But, she's still supportive and I appreciate her.
    Hi Bea , I know you appreciate her I can tell
    You saying I wish she saw it as cute and that reminds me of when we would have the same disagreements on stuff.....not often that we did but just me being honest it happened occasionally.
    Sounds like you both are on the same page and how cool is that.
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  5. #30
    Junior Member SidneytheScorpio's Avatar
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    Interesting topic.

    When you say too tight, are we talking about pants or tops? I personally like tight pants. I love yoga pants and tight jeans. Tops not super tight, but form fitting with some slack.

  6. #31
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    Girls, if you are so fortunate to have a wife or SO that is into your dressing, and comments on what you are wearing, LISTEN TO HER, positive or negative.

  7. #32
    Aspiring Member Bea_'s Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by SidneytheScorpio View Post
    Interesting topic.

    When you say too tight, are we talking about pants or tops? I personally like tight pants. I love yoga pants and tight jeans. Tops not super tight, but form fitting with some slack.
    The latest is a strapless romper/jumper. It's fitted around the waist with a little room to fill up top. I don't wear forms so my natural AA's have to do. The legs are full and lots of room in the hips. I think she was mostly put off that it was something one would expect to see on a more feminine form. My physique shows my age and my lack of activity and the pudge could have been the deciding factor. It wasn't so tight as just fitted on a much less than perfect body .

    I wore it most of the morning today and one thing that came to mind is that i modeled it on the day I bought it with a pair of bikinis which I'm guessing left an unflattering extra line. I wore a pair of stretchy briefs today that smoothed the front considerably and it looked much better, even to me. She knows I like it and actually "said" she liked it this morning. But, now I can't help but think she's being generous with the compliment. Maybe she's just adjusted to it somewhat. I appreciate it anyway and very much appreciate her support.

    I wear leggings and skinnies on a fairly regular basis (around the house) and she compliments my legs almost as regularly.

    [SIZE=1]- - - Updated - - -[/SIZE]

    Quote Originally Posted by Jenny22 View Post
    Girls, if you are so fortunate to have a wife or SO that is into your dressing, and comments on what you are wearing, LISTEN TO HER, positive or negative.
    I agree that we should listen, but if I hadn't been somewhat assertive in my own taste early on, she would "not be into" my dressing now. I show her opinions respect and then give her mine. I will still try to balance her comfort and opinions against my own and we do OK. I actually get quite a bit more positive feedback than negative, but that wasn't always the case.
    Last edited by Bea_; 08-06-2020 at 07:44 PM.

  8. #33
    Junior Member SidneytheScorpio's Avatar
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    In that case, I'd listen to her opinion. If you are going out solo then be free and comfortable to wear what you want and what makes you feel good, but I personally rely on the opinion of others to help me see with an unbiased eye.

  9. #34
    Member NicoleRenee's Avatar
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    With my SO, she has given me a lot of hand me downs that surprisingly fit because we are at least 60lbs different. But she likes to wear more lose fitting clothes so that helps. She has also bought me things in the past and we have shopped together, me in manmode though. She has told me when things were to tight, only because it were the wrong size or how it lines up with my body. What my SO does that I usually disagree on with her is that I have things that are to short. Short skirts or dresses. I don't have many and haven't worn them because she thinks so. She would never wear things like that. She is more of a modest person, never anything to revealing, short or low cut. I understand your circumstances though.

  10. #35
    Senior Member mbmeen12's Avatar
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    If you have the figure flaunt it...Listen to your wife too because what Ive read she is all in...

    Luckey gurl!
    Escapism isn't necessarily bad, but is definitely unhealthy in the long term. While helpful in the short term, things will degrade over time. At some point, the escapee will have to face the issue. Things simply blowing over isn't really going to happen in many situations.

  11. #36
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    Di,
    Very useful comment about honest opinion and cheerleading .

    I've recently been shopping on different occasions with a GG friend and a TS friend . I tend to buy totally different items between them , the GG friend suggests looser items and my TG friend more figure hugging . My TS friend and I are totally honest with each other , if something doesn't fit or the style isn't right we say so , at the same time we have a great time and have the SAs in fits of laughter .

    Saying that I'm fairly critical of myself , I know what I like and I know what suits me but at times I lack confidence in bright colours , that's when I find it's useful to have a second opinion .

  12. #37
    Aspiring Member Bea_'s Avatar
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    I finally had an opportunity to take photos of the "offending" outfits yesterday. After seeing the photos, I can honestly say that I understand her reason for not liking them. But, tightness isn't the true reason. I could go up a size or two and I'm convinced her opinion wouldn't change. The fact is that the fitted outfits show the complete lack of any hourglass. If a woman with reasonable curves wore the outfits with the same snugness, maybe some women would consider them to be tight, but most men might actually appreciate the look.

    After looking at the photos, I am still inclined to wear them on occasion, hopefully with some loss of weight. Since I only dress at home, she's the only one that will have to endure me in less than flattering outfits. Even if she sees the flaws in my "physique" (she doesn't like me to call it my "figure") she's been very generous in her love and acceptance. Tight or less flattering outfits are not the dealbreakers in the relationship. There are boundaries which leave me feeling constricted and there are open places that leave her feeling vulnerable. We've been working through it for a decade now have both been respectful and considerate for the most part. I don't see that changing.

    My wife tended for years to try and hide the changes in her figure by wearing oversized clothes. I praised her when she'd wear things that showed her waist and over time she actually started buying things that accentuated rather than hid her curves. What she'd have said was too tight for herself, for years, are now totally acceptable in her own mind.

    NOTE: And for those who might suggest breast forms or hip pads, I am not interested and those would definitely be dealbreakers. I definitely wouldn't give up the progress we've made for something I don't want.
    Last edited by Bea_; 08-08-2020 at 09:15 AM.

  13. #38
    Silver Member Bobbi46's Avatar
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    The only advers comment i got was from my girlfriend who kindly told me that she thought my boobs were too big!
    I started life a lost man now I am a found woman

  14. #39
    Aspiring Member Bea_'s Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Bobbi46 View Post
    The only advers comment i got was from my girlfriend who kindly told me that she thought my boobs were too big!
    My wife doesn't care for me to wear camisoles or bras because they actually do seem to make my natural (although small) manboobs look too much like 'breasts' to her. Forms are not an option. But, at least with forms you can adjust as needed.

  15. #40
    Senior Member Maid_Marion's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Bea_ View Post
    I finally had an opportunity to take photos of the "offending" outfits yesterday. After seeing the photos, I can honestly say that I understand her reason for not liking them. But, tightness isn't the true reason. I could go up a size or two and I'm convinced her opinion wouldn't change. The fact is that the fitted outfits show the complete lack of any hourglass. If a woman with reasonable curves wore the outfits with the same snugness, maybe some women would consider them to be tight, but most men might actually appreciate the look.
    There are style tips that can help compensate for the lack of an hourglass figure. Light colored denim jeans with whiskering or horizontal lines will make your bottom look wider. Black jeans have the opposite effect.

    People are more friendly if you can pull off that hourglass look.

    Marion

  16. #41
    Gold Member Sometimes Steffi's Avatar
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    Since my wife and I are DADT, my wife has never seen my wardrobe, nevermind seen me dressed.

    Probably the best thing to be said about DADT. I get to buy and wear clothes that I like, not what someone else likes on me. When I go out, my wife doesn't see me dressed. I never get the comment, "You're going out dressed like that?"

    If I'm dressing at a friends house, she might give me some some subtle style suggestions. I'll usually go to her house with a Plan B. Sometimes I switch to Plan B if my dress is too low cut and my chest hair shows.
    Hi, I'm Steffi and I'm a crossdresser... And I accept and celebrate both sides of me. Or, maybe I'm gender fluid.

  17. #42
    Aspiring Member Bea_'s Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Maid_Marion View Post
    There are style tips that can help compensate for the lack of an hourglass figure. Light colored denim jeans with whiskering or horizontal lines will make your bottom look wider. Black jeans have the opposite effect.

    People are more friendly if you can pull off that hourglass look.

    Marion
    I appreciate the tip, but I'm thinking that the only people who might be fooled with my figure are very near-sighted people who've left their glasses at home. That's ok with me since I don't try to look like a woman and don't get out of the house. If I were to ever get out, it would definitely be with something that I felt gave the very best impression that I could muster. But, if I truly worry more about other people's opinion, I'd probably just go out in drab.

  18. #43
    Member rian's Avatar
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    My wife comments are taken very seriously ...she encourage my choices ..and I listen to her opinion .
    Cross-dressing is a cross between woman's soul and man's heart.....

  19. #44
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    Quote Originally Posted by Bea_ View Post
    for those who might suggest breast forms or hip pads, I am not interested
    Well if you don't want to put in the effort, then don't complain when people say that looks awful on you.

    You can't have it both ways honey...

  20. #45
    Member *ROXY*'s Avatar
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    My wife encourages more fitted dresses and tops as they are often more slimming than loose fitted ones. Her only constructive comments usually suggest I wear a slip under the thinner dresses I own.
    Foxy Roxy has entered the building

  21. #46
    Aspiring Member Bea_'s Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Robertacd View Post
    Well if you don't want to put in the effort, then don't complain when people say that looks awful on you.

    You can't have it both ways honey...
    Actually, forms and padding would have a negative effect on my wife's acceptance. I get a slightly negative vibe when I wear anything that emphasizes my small but natural boobage. So, forms would not go over well. She might come to a point of "acceptance", but still feel the need to distance herself from it. I like the intimacy that we have, even when I'm in a dress. I don't care to push for something that isn't a big motivator for me.

    I'd much rather she didn't like a particular outfit because of the fit than not like my overall style because I pushed farther than she wanted. We're both good without the padding.
    Last edited by Bea_; 08-20-2020 at 09:46 AM.

  22. #47
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    That's how it is with my wife. Although she seldom comments on what I'm wearing, I do pay attention when she says something and try to wear things she has said she likes. She prefers skirts to dresses, and longer skirts over short ones. My tastes are less conservative than hers but I often try to give her something nice to look at.

  23. #48
    Silver Member Sandi Beech's Avatar
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    Well, I can't ask my wife if these shorts are too tight because A: They are, and B: She would have a fit if she saw me in them. These are so tight I have to lie down to put them on, haha. I know I am crazy. Too funny though.

    Sandi
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