Thinking of purging

[SophyV]

Hi all. It has been a while. The pandemic has limited my time I can devote to CD and related activities. As a result the pink fog I was in last year has mostly rolled out. At the moment I am comfortable wearing skirts when Incan but no longer feel the need to go full drag. So, I am considering purging those things like my wig makeup and breast forms. As a reminder, I am in the closet and will always be, so the more I have around the more chance I have of getting caught. I am looking for some input. I don?t want to purge then the fog rolls in again and have to start over. At the same time, I am not sure it will. Thanks in advance for your advice.

[kinky_caitlin]

From past experience, the pink fog will come back and you will wish you hadn't purged. Tho sometimes a purge can be refreshing to make a new wardrobe out of it and new style, but pretty much every one here will tell you that it will come back. Also this current world situation won't last forever and things will get back to normal someday (not soon enough for most of us, but it will)

[Bobbi46]

In a few words, don't purge! you may regret it but also if you, do to replace what gets done away with is money that followed bad.
I would try and find a place to store your things and then think out how you want your future to pan out, but as i say dont do anything right now, think first

[Visitor]

I've been buying lingerie that last few weeks with the thought THIS TIME I'll dedicate a dresser drawer where I can KEEP these lovely, sensual undergarments.

It has been interesting arriving here and reading about "purging," something I've done, both out of fear and out of shame. Yes, that is definitely a part of living a life that is judged so severely by so many insecure people. When I listed for my former wife the many sexual things I'd done in my life, the one that least upset her was my crossdressing. I was surprised by her response. She reminded my one of her dear friends is a therapist who works with gender fluid clients. She has heard a great deal about what we do.

I've no idea how at risk you are to exposure or what the consequences of exposure might be to you... but I would say that respecting the feelings that lead you to express yourself as you do, with women's clothing, wigs and makeup, is important. I'm intent on not shaming myself for these feelings and behaviors. I live alone, so it is easier for me to indulge these feelings. I hope you find a response that honors your feelings and cares for you.

I expect two new brassieres to arrive today and I'm excited. I certainly have no intention of throwing them away...

[Stephanie47]

COVID is a bad time to make dramatic changes to one's life. Currently, for many of us living in a "smoke storm," yes, that's the new phrase around here, there is very little time to express oneself. My wife and I are retirees. She is recovering from a total knee replacement. Pre-COVID she'd be out of the house overnight to babysit of grandchild. I'd have an evening/night to myself. None of that is going to happen soon. So, I am now limited to pecking away on the computer (this site) and perusing feminine garments. Yes, four panties are in the mail headed this way. It's keeping my head in the game. To me it's a diversion from the limitations imposed beyond my control.

Don't purge. I don't know how big your stash is. There may be an immense cost to replace any purged garments. If you're a closeted cross dresser why is your exposure increasing now than before? Is your wife and child rummaging through the domicile because of COVID isolation or you just feel exposure will ultimately occur? That aside, it sounds as if depression is governing your decisions.

[Stexxl]

I'd be inclined to purge if I'm honest. As you're in the closet I assume your partner finding stuff would be really bad news?

A partner finding something like breast forms is as in your face as it gets and it generally doesn't go down well (as I know from personal experience).

Just my $0.02

Good luck whatever your decision!

[Laura912]

Based on 73 years of experience, don’t do it.

[alwayshave]

Sophy, Don't purge, you'll regret it.

[adelinapa]

Purging is so hard, I really feel for anyone who is in the process and I hope you don't.

[Angela Marie]

My advice after two purges is DON'T. After my last purge, when I got rid of some beautiful outfits, I did not dress for a year. I finally came to peace with myself and my feminine feelings and started dressing again.

[kimdl93]

The fog will roll in, although it comes on its own schedule. You may never go beyond the closet, but even if that proves to be true, someday you may again find yourself wishing to avail yourself of those expensive make-up items and breast forms. When/if that day arrives, you will regret the waste of money and time as you replenish your supply.

Find a secure place, perhaps someplace other than your home, to keep these items until you want them and/or until you wish to disclose these unique attributes to your wife.

[wendy]

From personal experience, and 2 purges, I wouldn't do it at all. I regret the purges I did, as I lost items that I can never get back (like 80s-90s aerobic wear with spandex legging).

At the beginning of my relationship, I had to hide Wendy's stuff, and I ran the risk of my spouse finding out too. Luck just had it she never found it.

If you are gonna purge, do a few items at a time. Like purge the bigger items, ones that have a higher risk of being found. Keep items that can easily be hidden.

I can assure you, the pink fog will hit and it will hit hard.

[joank]

Based on 77 years, don't do it. I have been through three major purges and many minor ones. PINK FOG COMES BACK( with a vengeance at times).

[JocelynJames]

This sounds like me when I can?t ride motorcycle for the winter and start thinking about selling by February. Then come April and the snow is gone I say one more ride before I sell . Next thing I know it?s Thanksgiving and time to think about putting it away for winter again.
I wouldn?t purge. I have dressed only a few times this year , but the clothes are there as a reminder. I?ve never purged and I don?t know what it would take for me to get there. Give it time, and you?ll probably thank us for telling you not to. Just my 2 cents

[Jeri Rene]

I will add another "don't do it" to the pile. I have purged a few times now and regret it. The urge to dress may have faded but it comes back, at least in my experience.

[Liz Jones]

The urge to crossdress.

[Jenny Elwood]

This sounds like me when I can?t ride motorcycle for the winter

Not ride in Winter!? Madness I tell you! Just kidding, over here in South Africa riding in winter is often the best time. Our winters are cold(dish) in the morning and early evening but it's ALWAYS dry (no rain or snow). So if you're properly insulated it's actually great for riding without the worry of running into foul weather later on.

Regarding purging, if you're keeping your skirts you may as well keep the rest because unless you purge completely, you really haven't purged at all...

[Robertacd]

You know one of the things that make spouses angry is the money we spend.

Hop off the buy, purge, buy, purge train and just find a safe place to store everything.

You know you are going to need it all again once things get back to some sense of normal.

[Kay J]

I would buy all new outfits if i was going to purge my old ones no jk please don't purge learn by everyone mistake!!!

[DianeT]

AmandaSophy, are you in the closet because you are hiding your dressing to your SO? In that case, an option is to not purge and rather tell your SO.

[NancySue]

Don?t do it. I did..once. Never more!

[Teresa]

AmandaS.,
I often feel members who have a wax and wane situation have the biggest problem , some tell of going months perhaps even years before it happens again , . Whether you have clothes etc. or not will not stop it happening again , so why not pack the stuff away and see what happens . Getting caught , it happens and again it's so much harder for someone to explain when it's not a continuous feeling .

The bottom line is it will come back , it's part of you like it's part of me , the difference being I felt the need 24/7 , so it's easier to be full time , the only purging maybe male clothes .

[Bruce64]

Rule No1, Never purge

[Nastasha]

In the end you have to do what works for you. That said, I have purged a few times and regret it, like Wendy mentioned I had some really nice things that you just can't get anymore.
I think you need to sit on it for a few days and make sure, the fog does come back, and the expense involved in building back up can be draining.

[MaryAnn1963]

You asked for opinions... mine is NO, don't do it! I have yet to hear on an instance where purging had worked out for the best. CDing for most of us is part of who we are. When we try to shut that part away, then you start living as an incomplete self. In my experience, I wasn't very happy trying to be "normal". I'm not. Put your things away somewhere safe till Amanda calls you again.... she will.