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Thread: Does Crossdressing fit into LGBTQ?

  1. #51
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    I hate to be labeled with a group referring to the LGBTQ moniker. I don't consider myself in compliance to any of those groups . I am simply a male who likes the feel and color of women's clothing. That in itself isn't right either. Society has long declared that women wear clothing designed just for them and men wear clothing considered just for the them with no crossover. We are designated that way and anything else is considered wrong by society's rules. There are those who feel that they must pass as female or male because for whatever reason, that's how things are. That's who they relate to. Some pass quite well well others are labeled as MIAD or other terms. Others, like me, just wear what we like and could not pass as female anyway and do not go out into the real world where its not accepted behavior. Sometimes, such desires are not even accepted from fear of acceptance at home.
    I'm ok with just knowing I don't have to confirm to a label.
    Pink is more than a color: its an attitude!

  2. #52
    @--}----- Sissy_Michelle's Avatar
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    GwenHerself,

    Just my two cents, but there needs to be an ?H? added to that list. . . Human. I would rather be known as human than some letter.

    @?-}??
    Michelle

  3. #53
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    I think this really comes down to the individual. If one cross dresses to feel or be feminine then they are at the very least genderfluid which is covered under the T. How ever if it is just for the clothes and you are male and thays that then not really but you could be. The two support groups I go to are both accepting and welcoming to cross dressers regardless of where they fit. We are welcoming to anyone who is supportive or needs support.

  4. #54
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    In my opinion, yes. Either under T, which could stand for either transgender or transvestite, or Q, which could signify queer or questioning. LGBTQ is (or should be) a big tent that includes many flavors of "not fitting the gender binary".

  5. #55
    Platinum Member Teresa's Avatar
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    Abbyru1,
    That's the whole point of the LGBTQ community they try and make it easier for our needs to be acceptable behavior , no one has told me my behaviour isn't acceptable .

    BobbiKay,
    It covers the transgender community , not all TGs dress .
    Last edited by Teresa; 11-29-2020 at 07:53 PM.
    The real me , no going back.

  6. #56
    The 100th sheep GaleWarning's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Sissy_Michelle View Post
    GwenHerself,

    Just my two cents, but there needs to be an ?H? added to that list. . . Human. I would rather be known as human than some letter.

    @?-}??
    Michelle
    I think H should replace all the other letters. That would really simplify things!
    Unfortunately, there are too many bigotted people out there.
    Go, you LGBTQ+ activists!
    I'm in my small corner, doing my little bit.
    Just an H.

  7. #57
    Aspiring Member SaraLin's Avatar
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    Apparently this question has been percolating in the back of my mind for a few days now, because I think I have an answer (maybe not YOUR answer, but one that works for me).

    I think that how a person dresses is the THIRD dimension in our make up. I'll explain:

    Dimension ONE is who we're attracted to. DO we like people of the same sex? the opposite sex? Both? Neither?
    This would cover the L, G, and B letters. And, of course, those "curiously straight" folks.

    Dimension TWO is our -um- gender congruity. How happy are with the physical body we've been born into?
    most people (both male and female at birth) are happy with their sex. Trans folks aren't. They (we?) would be somewhere along this dimension.

    Dimension THREE would be our gender presentation / behavior.
    Straight, hetero crossdressers would be along the "standard" end of dimensions one and two, but would be somewhere along this dimension.
    I'd say that effeminate men or "butch" women, even if they don't CD, would fall somewhere along this line too.

    With this "model", everyone fits somewhere along each of the three dimensions of this 3D umbrella - even the muggles who are tucked off in a corner.

    Our world in three dimensional. So are people. Seems easy enough to me.

    OK - feel free to disagree now.
    Last edited by SaraLin; 11-30-2020 at 06:29 AM. Reason: spotted a typo

  8. #58
    playing dress up JC's Avatar
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    Cross dressing does not fit under the protection of us law.
    JC

    the guy that plays dress up and that has the best wife in the world!

  9. #59
    Member Star01's Avatar
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    I have dabbled in section B enough to know it?s a thing with me but haven?t acted on it for a while. While I am sure my past experience punches my ticket to a seat in section B for the parade I elect to remain a silent ally and not an activist. I don?t know if my crossdressing gives me a double membership.

  10. #60
    Platinum Member Teresa's Avatar
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    Star,
    That is a good point I wonder how many prefer to stay under the radar in the LGBTQ community ?
    The real me , no going back.

  11. #61
    Silver Member Rogina B's Avatar
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    Someone in the closet doesn't add support when they purposely are not visable. A "straight ally" signs on the dotted line with their full legal name.
    It SURE is my hair ! I have the receipt and the box it came in !

  12. #62
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    I say we definitely fall under the T. I am a firm believer that transgenderism is not a binary yes/no, on/off proposition, but a continuum. Think of it not as a light switch, but a dimmer switch that can light the light anywhere from full on to full off. Zero is where most men believe themselves to be (or they lie about it). Turn that dial up to eleven and you have someone who has, or is, or will be undergoing transition. I myself believe my femininity dial sits around the seven position, which for me means I want to present as feminine quite often, but I'm OK with compromising to fill the male role for some things like work.

  13. #63
    Junior Member atlflygirl's Avatar
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    It's important to note that being LGBTQ is about identity and not about activity. That means a man who enjoys crossdressing but otherwise identifies as a man and leads a heterosexual lifestyle (wife, kids, etc.) is not LGBTQ. It is important to think of LGBTQ as a journey of self-discovery: having internal feelings of being different, living out those feelings and then claiming that behavior as an identity for oneself. If you have feelings of being female, crossdress and discover that you actually ARE a woman, you are most definitely transgender. Otherwise, if you don't tie your crossdressing to how you see your gender, you aren't LGBTQ. The fact that many crossdressers are also bisexual simply means that they are bisexual (and thus LGBTQ), but that is sexuality and not gender that is the determining factor in that case.

  14. #64
    The 100th sheep GaleWarning's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by atlflygirl View Post
    It's important to note that being LGBTQ is about identity and not about activity. That means a man who enjoys crossdressing but otherwise identifies as a man and leads a heterosexual lifestyle (wife, kids, etc.) is not LGBTQ. It is important to think of LGBTQ as a journey of self-discovery: having internal feelings of being different, living out those feelings and then claiming that behavior as an identity for oneself. If you have feelings of being female, crossdress and discover that you actually ARE a woman, you are most definitely transgender. Otherwise, if you don't tie your crossdressing to how you see your gender, you aren't LGBTQ. The fact that many crossdressers are also bisexual simply means that they are bisexual (and thus LGBTQ), but that is sexuality and not gender that is the determining factor in that case.
    Your post confirms that crossdressers are deeply misunderstood, and not accepted by too many who are somewhere else on the spectrum.

  15. #65
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    @JC - actually, crossdressing is now protected under US law, at least in the workplace. As long as you dress in a manner consistent with your company?s dress code (which has to be gender neutral - meaning it can?t say ?men must wear slacks and women must wear skirts?) you can dress as you see fit. The Supreme Court settled this when it ruled this year that Title VII of the civil rights act applied to gay and transgender employees. So if you want to wear a skirt, dress, Kendra Scott earrings, or whatever to work, you can do so. And if someone objects or you are fired, you have one hell of a lawsuit on your hands. I?ve discussed this at length with my chief HR rep as well as my law school pals who are employment lawyers (I?m a lawyer too, but not an employment lawyer specifically).

    As to whether we ?fit? in the LGBTQ spectrum, I?d say we do if we want to under either the T or Q label. The key to me is if ?we want to? identify that way. I used to NOT think I was on that spectrum, but as I got older and discussed with counselors, I now identify that way. Why? Because when I dress it?s not simply just because I like the way an item looks for feels, but also because it draws out a feminine element of my identity. I now acknowledge and embrace that, and so I believe it means I?m incorporated into the LGBTQ community.

    Now will some people disagree with that? Sure. Important to note however is that there is no official LGBTQ admissions or membership board authorized to decide who is and is not ?in? the community. You get to decide, period. Someone may say ?well you aren?t taking hormones or seeking surgery so you?re not part of this? but that?s nothing more than their opinion. And, in my mind, the hell with them. Go be judgmental and shun others, it won?t work with me.

  16. #66
    Aspiring Member TheHiddenMe's Avatar
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    Yes, crossdressers fall under the transgender spectrum. Period.

    As to the comment than many CDs are bi, that's not what the data shows. Only a small percentage of persons polled (less than 5%) say they are bi.

    Most data regarding MTF CDs suggests something like 70% are married. I would suggest a minority on this board are either gay or bi; most are heterosexual.

    But regardless of sexual orientation, cross dressers are part of the transgender community.

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