purge, spend, repeat

[Janet Devon]

Hi MissyNicole,
I know you have already had plenty of good advice but I would like to add that I have purged a couple times. I found that I regretted it later. I couldn't replace some of what I lost. Now that my wife knows, I simply move them to a closet in the basement. Out of site out if mind is the thought. Really, it is harder to get to so I just dress less often. That seems to help my wife who doesn't want to be married to a girl. She is happy to play from time to time but not all of the time.

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Josie, you look like my niece. Very pretty.

[adelinapa]

I'm so sorry for your loss. Not only for the clothes, but the part of you that gets discarded when one purges.

I think we've all been there, but that doesn't make it easier to bear someone else's loss.

[DanielleCD]

I purged several times in my life.. usually when starting a new relationship, in hopes that my desire/need to CD would go away. It never did... it never will. Since my wife knows now I CD, I will never need to, thankfully!

[Rachel Lea]

I have purged a couple of times. Last time was 2 years ago. But, I am not successful, I have a box due next Monday from Amazon. Wig, bra, panties, stockings, suspenders. It just does not go away!

[MaryAnn1963]

The next time my stuff will get purged is when someone ELSE has to clean out my house because I'm dead and gone!!! It is a total waste of time and money. It is also a huge strain on ones emotions. But, on the good note, now you get to go shopping for all the things that make you feel happy inside and out...

[Stephanie47]

I've never purged. There was a very long period of time that was filled with self loathing for wearing feminine attire. I was not fulfilling societal norms and expectations. Mentally I did create a balance scale in my head. I loaded up cross dressing on one side. On the other side I loaded up all those things a man was suppose to do in life. Well, the scale went totally on the side of expectations of a man in society. That little issue of wearing women's clothing was left stranded high and dry. Images of a small underweight kid sitting on one end of a teeter todder and Baby Huey on the other end. I never went any sort of counseling for gender issues. I think I was able to figure it out for myself. I came to the conclusion the problem was really someone else's problem. I just have to deal with their problem. Sort of shit rolls downhill. Even through those low points I'd look at my small stash of clothing in the bottom draw of my armoire and my night stand I saw those clothes as something that was a part of expressing who I was. To cast them aside would be to cast a part of myself aside. Rather than boxing everything up and storing it away I'd suggest keeping something readily available to reminder you of your true self.

[Edelia]

Normal purge isn't so serious problem, but in my last I made a terrible mistake, I cut my long hair 😔

[Phileena]

I would say life is short to purge, do accept yourself as you really are, there is no harm. Just be proud.
I purged only once, 25 years ago when I moved in with my girlfriend... who became my lovely wife later. At the time all things trashed and especially all tights teared apart in order to make it real in my mind. But my true self came back quickly and then I bought even more girl clothes, makeup, hair stuff, and never stopped... never will now.
Love.

[lucidgirl]

Haha, somewhat reassuring that so many women here have purged. I'm more of the same - have been through so many purges and re-purges over the years. Right now I have the biggest wardrobe I've every had and I think my purging days are behind me Good luck you you!

[RachelRose]

Wow I am glad I am not the only one.

[Stevie Allyn]

Sometimes I think purging is like a rite of passage for us CDers. I have purged just the once several years ago and I still miss some of my lovely things - oh my gorgeous black leather Mary Janes, why oh why did I give you away?

I promised myself "never again" and the last time I was unable to dress for some time I put everything in storage boxes in the loft. It was like Christmas when I was able to get the boxes down and wear my clothes again.

[Natalie5004]

Normal purge isn't so serious problem, but in my last I made a terrible mistake, I cut my long hair 😔

Me too. I hate it. Most all people I know are glad I cut it but gee it is mine and I can do what I want. WTF Now I have 2 years to wait again.

[Amelia_Rose]

I've purged 2/3 times I think...the last being just before I met my wife (so...4 years ago?). I think I went about 2 months after we started living together before I started borrowing her stuff in secret. I tried a few times to quit cold-turkey during that time, since obviously I could not just throw away her stuff! But, now that we've had the talk and she knows about this side of me, I can finally purchase and keep my own stuff again, and she lets me borrow freely and openly from her as well. I hope this means that cycle is behind me now, because it is painful and really only harms in the long run, both emotionally and monetarily.