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Thread: Seen by neighbour.

  1. #1
    Aspiring Member KymG's Avatar
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    Seen by neighbour.

    I have got in the habit of taking a sunday night drive.
    By mistake i had left my car by a neighbours window, and when i walked downstairs to it she heard the door go and looked out of the window just as i was stood there unlocking the car.
    The area is well lit, and she definitly saw me.

    Now did she see Kym getting in to my car?
    Or me getting in to my car..
    I deliberately drove off slower than i normally would so that it might look like someone else other than me.

    I considered sending a text saying, yes, you did see me dressed as a woman,
    Ive since reconsidered and think im better off leaving it.

    I really want to know if ive been clocked, its getting to me.
    I always said i wouldnt care if the neighbours saw me but now i do.
    God knows why, as it shouldnt matter

    Any thoughts?

  2. #2
    Member Liz Jones's Avatar
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    When the weather was hot i wore a skirt . One day i went out into the road -a neighbor was passing . She said nothing but the young daughter with her giggled (mother told her to stop ) nothing since then has been said , so just leave it in her court............
    Liz

  3. #3
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    I'd leave it be. You lent your car to your friend, Kym.

  4. #4
    Super Moderator Raychel's Avatar
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    I would not say anything, Just let her open the topic if she desires.
    my sister's reply when I told her how I prefer to dress

    "Everyone has there thing, all that matters is that you are happy, love what you do and who you do it with"

  5. #5
    Aspiring Member KymG's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by BobbiKay View Post
    I'd leave it be. You lent your car to your friend, Kym.
    I like that. Thank you.

  6. #6
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    Quote Originally Posted by BobbiKay View Post
    I'd leave it be. You lent your car to your friend, Kym.
    Yep, that would be my go to response.

  7. #7
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    Quote Originally Posted by KymG View Post
    I considered sending a text saying, yes, you did see me dressed as a woman,
    Why would you do something like that?

    Without seeing you, we have no idea if you passed or if you just looked like yourself in a dress. So only you know if you were clocked. Either way I would not say anything to them, because it's none of their business.

    Quote Originally Posted by BobbiKay View Post
    You lent your car to your friend
    If they ask either fess up or say it's none of their business, don't lie. Because if they indeed recognized you lying is only going to make you a lair on top of "everything else".

    The only neighbor I "came out to" was the lady that lived behind us. But she had just moved in and I had not introduced myself, and I just arrived home dressed, so why not? The neighbors on either side have lived here for over a decade and have all see me many times now. I just smile and wave, (I mean honestly, what are they going to do?) I haven't felt the need to tell them that I am TG, I think they have figured it out by now...
    Last edited by Robertacd; 12-15-2020 at 09:37 AM.

  8. #8
    Aspiring Member Debs's Avatar
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    Leave it, there will always be a doubt in there head whether it was you or not, or my they thought nothing of someone borring your car, eitherway they will say nothing.

  9. #9
    tiptoeing thru the tulips ellbee's Avatar
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    I've moved around quite a bit in my life.

    Which means? Over the decades, I've had plenty of neighbors, including current ones, some who I already "knew" (in some form or another) who have/had seen me in various states of dress... Total guy-mode, total girl-mode, as well as mixed-mode. And apparently I've somehow survived!

    Just a fact of life that neighbors *will* see you, regardless how you're presenting, from time to time. It happens. Get used to that.


    Texting her to "fess up"? Why would you do that?

    Of course, that also means you have her number, which suggests you have a stronger/deeper-than-typical neighbor-relationship, yes?


    If she saw you, and if she's curious? She'll likely bring it up at some point -- in one way or another. Maybe directly, or maybe by being a bit more sly.

    And if she does? Run with it! Who cares, really. Own it, have fun with it. And if she's a bit coy about she approaches it? Then reciprocate! Basically playfully acknowledging that you know that she knows, just in not so many words!


    Because you know what? Maybe she'll be totally cool & possibly even encouraging about it. Give her the benefit of the doubt, on that, at least for now.

    This *could* lead up to a very cool friendly relationship with a GG, with CD'ing playing a strong role! Maybe she'll unload some hand-me-downs onto you... Maybe she'd want to hang out, give you a make-over, go shopping with you, whatever. All in due time, I mean.


    Seriously, she's a GG. And as long as she's not your SO? You'd be surprised at how many of them are at least okay with it all, to one degree or another. At the very least, a GG at least understands a bit more where you're coming from, since you share a commonality... You know, as opposed to a male neighbor.


    Whatever you do, though? Do *not* lie about it! Because she won't like that.

    I think plenty of GG's here have already hammered that point home.


    Bottom line? Excellent chance that you'll be okay.

  10. #10
    Gold Member Helen_Highwater's Avatar
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    Something similar has happened to me on a couple of occasions where the neighbours have caught a glimpse of me dressed. I just let it sit there and nothing has ever been said so I'd say do nothing unless they bring it up.

  11. #11
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    I remember my parents repeatedly telling me to close the curtains as the neighbours could see in. I still to this day wonder how many times I was seen dressing, particularly given we had a bus stop opposite and a double decker was near enough the right height to see into my room.

  12. #12
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    She saw her cis-gendered male neighbor wearing women's clothes as he got into his car in his driveway with his keys. So what? If you were truly concerned with being seen, you would have never left the privacy of your own home.

  13. #13
    Senior Member Angela Marie's Avatar
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    I agree with others; calling is not a good idea. I wear my leggings out all the time so the neighbors and others I know may have some inkling. Now none of them, as far as I know, have seen me fully dressed. I take a lot of precautions. But as they say the best laid plans of mice and men. I have often thought how I would handle such a situation. My wife who is supportive has always asked me to be very discreet around our neighbors; and I have complied. I don't think most people would confront you and many may in fact not care one bit.

  14. #14
    Silver Member Natalie5004's Avatar
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    I have a relatively private backyard. Except for one upstairs window from my neighbor. He is a single gay man. If ever there was a chance to see me dressed, he has it. I have been doing this for at least a year now. I am 99% he glanced out the window and saw me watering my flowers or maybe a photo shoot. Never a word from him about it.

    We are cool. So, please do not worry. Things are fine.

  15. #15
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    I would definitely not send her a text.

    I wouldn't say anything to her or act differently towards her. If she brings it up, you can say you lent your car to a friend or you can admit to being a crossdresser, your choice. Or you could say you were going to a costume party.

    In any event, unless you admit to her that you are a crossdresser, you need to be much more careful in the future. You can never know who will be watching when you go from your house to the car or vice versa.
    Krisi

  16. #16
    Aspiring Member Bea_'s Avatar
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    I would definitely not send a text. I would either leave it alone or wait for an opportunity to talk personally. I've had the old adage, that you NEVER put anything like that in writing, play out negatively in my life.

    If she saw something and wants to gossip to neighbors it's one thing. If she wants to gossip by going around showing the neighbors your text, it's a more concrete thing.

    I'd love to read here that you end up getting some affirmative feedback from you neighbor. That's what all of us would ultimately like to receive.

  17. #17
    Silver Member Maria 60's Avatar
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    It never seems to amaze me that I could walk outside a thousand times in male mode and never see a soul. Every time I have to take a little chance just to maybe take those 10 steps to my car, POW! There's my niebour out and looking for small talk. A few weeks back I was taking out the garbage to the garage wearing my male cloths and male slippers with black pantyhose. I seen nobody was out and wouldn't you know it, 5 steps out there's my niebour wanting to show me pictures of his grandson. I know he looked down and noticed my feet with the black reinforced toe of the pantyhose on full display. I under played it and acted normal and it's a big question mark what he seen and if he seen? I think the unanswered question is better that way. I have talked to him many times since and it seems all the same.
    Last edited by Maria 60; 12-14-2020 at 10:04 AM.

  18. #18
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    Kym,
    I often see this from a different direction , are we to assume we all have perfect neighbours that would never do anything strange or out of the ordinary ?

    OK the fear is if you're in a DADT situation something maybe said to your wife . I decided when I moved to tell my neighbours straight I was TG so if they see a blond it will be me , otherwise there was a risk they would be talking and making assumptions behind my back . Now it's perfectly normal to chat to my neighbours as Teresa , I now avoid being seen in male mode .

    It reaches a point of you deciding are crossdressing as a hobby or dressing to deal with dysphoria , if it's the latter then at some point you need to put the neighbours in the picture , otherwise it makes acceptance harder .
    Last edited by Teresa; 12-14-2020 at 11:49 AM.

  19. #19
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    The one thing that limits my dressing in public is getting to and from the car. I just know there's a chance a neighbor is walking by or looking out his or her window. Why do I care? I don't want to be known as the "tranny down the block". More importantly, my wife would be embarrassed and this crap is hard enough on her already.

    My solution is to underdress and then change in the car in a secluded parking lot away from home. And of course, change back before I return home.

    This is difficult enough that it's often just not worth the trouble.

    If one is living as a woman, it's a different story, you just walk out the door with your head held high and get in the car and drive away.
    Krisi

  20. #20
    Exploring NEPA now Cheryl T's Avatar
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    Unless she mentions it just forget it happened.
    I don't wear women's clothes, I wear MY clothes !

  21. #21
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    I'd leave it alone too! Having gone back and looked at your picture postings you better have a reasonable explanation at the ready. You present with a dynamite body that is hard to miss. Gorgeous creature you are!

    Now the questions arises as to whether she was laying in wait for you to return home so she could get another glimpse? As to the neighbors caring, if you do not have a relationship with them, you have not lost anything anyway. And, perhaps she was intrigued and will find a reason to talk to you. Just be prepared so you're not flustered.
    Last edited by Stephanie47; 12-14-2020 at 06:38 PM.

  22. #22
    Female Illusionist! docrobbysherry's Avatar
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    Kym, now u know to be more careful! Forget about it and hope for the best!
    U can't keep doing the same things over and over and expect to enjoy life to the max. When u try new things, even if they r out of your comfort zone, u may experience new excitement and growth that u never expected.

    Challenge yourself and pursue your passions! When your life clock runs out, you'll have few or NO REGRETS!

  23. #23
    Aspiring Member KymG's Avatar
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    Thanks for the replys everyone,
    When i got back i parked in a spot that she couldnt see (unless hiding in the bushes) and snuck in out of view.
    I hope i wasnt recognised, after all i was dressed nicely and fully made up.
    Pretty sure im not recognisable, apart from the give away of the car, so she would never know for sure.
    Having said that, i was well overdressed for a sunday night drive. Lbd as usual.

    I shall see if she says anything, which i think is unlikely.

  24. #24
    Silver Member Pumped's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Maria 60 View Post
    It never seems to amaze me that I could walk outside a thousand times in male mode and never see a soul.

    Funny how that is!
    We were sitting on our deck behind our house this summer. I was wearing high heels, shorts and a basic top. My wife looked at my feet and said I was taking a bit of a risk. I said nobody stops by because of COVID so I wasn't worried about it. I stepped into the house for something and heard voices. Here the next door neighbors walked over. 15 seconds earlier I would have been sitting out there. I flipped off the heels and went out. The shorts and top were fairly generic so they didn't concern me.

  25. #25
    Junior Member adelinapa's Avatar
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    It's been my experience that no conversation ever went the right way in text messages. Srsly I've lost friends who insisted on working through something with text.

    I'm with the others, leave it be. They prolly just shrugged their shoulders and went about their day.
    The world is falling apart and ppl are like "EHRMYGAWD is that a man with fingernail polish on?"

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