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Thread: WHEW moments...

  1. #1
    Junior Member
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    WHEW moments...

    I'm married, and I just can't come out to anyone. Personal reasons. But I've had some moments that got my heart pumping.

    1) Getting called - worrying about FaceTime En Femme.

    2) Being out and not making it back in time before your SO

    3) Worst of all, packages left at the front door. I've gotten some that have brands and descriptions written on the box.

    These are all horrible - makes me feel like a serial killer. My wife has so much anxiety for every day things, she can't handle something like this.

    Anybody got any specific stories related to this thread?

  2. #2
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    Hi Laurie, I guess most of us have had those kinds of moments. I once left a bra in the bathroom. Yikes! I have to tell you though, if you're ordering things to your house, going out and getting facetime calls, getting found out is not a question of if but when.
    -Jen

  3. #3
    Member Alexis00's Avatar
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    Got some sheer black panties in the mail. Put them on my dresser and forgot about it. My live-in GF found them.

    “Those were supposed to be a surprise for you!” By some miracle, though a little loose they fit her well enough she believed me. So easily two sizes two small for me, anyway.

    Months later she found some pictures, no talking my way out of that. She moved out the next month.

  4. #4
    Silver Member Geena75's Avatar
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    Dec 8, 2020 I was as fully dressed as I get and my wife comes home early from work. She never saw me, but she saw the make up on the table, camera on the tripod, and an old wig and shoes on my chair. For full details, check my thread "Curiosity and Fear."

  5. #5
    Silver Member Frannie7's Avatar
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    Hi Laurie, I told my wife in March but before that there were a few close calls. Once I had everything laid out in the spare room and makeup all over the extra bathroom. She had forgotten something and came home. I hopped in the shower with full makeup and she never went in the other rooms. I have also left a few things out but managed to say I got them for her. Anyway, if you are not ready to tell her yet I would avoid getting calls on Facetime (maybe you can block those) If possible, have packages delivered elsewhere. I use a friend that does know.

  6. #6
    Silver Member Pumped's Avatar
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    I rinsed out a pair of panties and hung them to dry behind the furnace in our laundry room. It is a dark corner and no reason for my wife to go back there. There is always some boxes of junk in the way so it is difficult to get back there. Later when I came home they were laying on the ironing board. That lead to my DADT time, and the evolution of our relationship and my dressing, a little rough at times, but great in the end.

  7. #7
    Miss Conception Karren H's Avatar
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    If your wife can not handle finding out... you need to stop! Because she will find out... that is a given, it is just when will she find out. and the damage to your relationship will be real and severe and long lasting. Assuming you even have a relationship. Voice of experience for the last 15 years.... my wife finding out was the worst day of my life... her life and it impacts out relationship ever single day.... still.

  8. #8
    Silver Member Pumped's Avatar
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    I agree, the question isn't if, but when she will find out.

    Better to approach her and talk about it, than for her to come home unexpectedly and find you fully dressed.

  9. #9
    Female Illusionist! docrobbysherry's Avatar
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    I'm going to just HATE reading here about what happens to u when the S hits the fan, Laurie!

    My adult daughter almost caught me so many times, dressing wasn't fun for me any more, just stressful!

    I just had to tell her or get caught, or give up Sherry!
    U can't keep doing the same things over and over and expect to enjoy life to the max. When u try new things, even if they r out of your comfort zone, u may experience new excitement and growth that u never expected.

    Challenge yourself and pursue your passions! When your life clock runs out, you'll have few or NO REGRETS!

  10. #10
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    I was dressed and working from home when I heard my wife's car pull up outside: it was about two hours earlier than the time she usually got home. I ran upstairs and changed as fast as I could, thinking that the locked front door would buy me some extra seconds. But it wasn't locked, and she came straight up to the bedroom. She came in and found me in shock, white as a ghost and visibly shaking. I had managed to dress normally, apart from not managing to get my socks on. Naturally she was concerned about my obvious fear and anxeity and wanted to know what was going on, so I told her. That was the start of a deeply unpleasant phase of our lives. She did not appreciate discovering that after more than 10 years of marriage. That was nearly 15 years ago. We're still together, though have nearly parted several times, and it's DADT. I get parcels delivered to local shops and collect them from there rather than have them delivered to the house. The few times I've had things delivered to home, I felt - as you say - a bit like a serial killer, and at the same time, furious that I can't have normal things delivered to my own front door just because of my gender. The pandemic has been a real trial with all of us - kids as well - at home for most of the last 12 months, so there's been no dressing for me. I had planned and booked a few days away on my own in November, but we were put back under lockdown by then so that was cancelled.

  11. #11
    Silver Member Geena75's Avatar
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    You know, now that I think of it, over the last eight years I have probably had almost a dozen 'whew moments,' when someone came by unexpectedly and I had to do a quick change, or I left something out which could have been noticed, etc. It was easier before I started playing with make up. It's part of the hobby for me, so I make contingency plans for a what if. The 'Pink Fog' can be dangerous, though.

  12. #12
    Exploring NEPA now Cheryl T's Avatar
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    Had all those and more over the years.
    Then I had enough and had the talk. I said to her "we have a problem".
    I explained to her (she found out years ago but thought I had stopped) that I don't want to stop. I need to be able to dress and express myself this way.

    Long story short, she is fully accepting now and life is so much better. I was willing to take the chance no matter the consequences and I was a lucky one.
    I don't wear women's clothes, I wear MY clothes !

  13. #13
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    My wife and I had "The Talk" back in 1983 when our daughter pulled a Vanity Fair bra out of the bottom draw of my armoire. In the first years of our marriage we had dabbled in lingerie for me as a 'kink' fetish thing in the bedroom. It was nylon gowns and some hosiery (stocks and garter belts). That started one night when she found me wearing one of her negligees while drinking a glass of water in the kitchen. She asked why I was wearing her nightgown. I told her the truth of the time. I liked the feel of the nylon. That's what initiated nightgowns for me. We even went shopping together for some. I still have a pink peignoir set from that time period as well as the white negligee she found me in that first night. Sentimental.

    On occasion she has found a wayward panty or bra I failed to squirrel away. She just folded them and put them on top of the secluded clothes dryer. She did find a set of unpopped water balloons in the kitchen sink. She has found the browser on the computer open to this site. She wants nothing to do with my cross dressing. Pre-covid, when she was out and about she'd call and ask for a ride from the bus stop or tell me which bus she was taking home. She does not drive due to a depth perception problem. I think she suspects I am dressing any time she is not home. Not so. She does not check my armoire. I guess she is "not looking for trouble." When we had "The Talk" she did say it was alright with her if I joined a support. Back then, in the dark ages, there was none in my area.

    I get my parcels in the mail. She rarely walks down the block to the community mailbox. Since almost everything has a tracking number and I recognize the sound of the mail truck's engine I'm the one who always get the mail. On occasion, when the mailbox was in front of our house, she'd bring a small package up.

    We've been married for almost fifty years. She knows who I am. I know who she is. Both of us have "defects" and "secrets." There are things she does not want to talk about under penalty of divorce. It pains me when I read comments on this site when a wife find out and she tossed her husband out the door. In the heat of the moment I know it could have happened to us, but, cooler heads prevailed. All I can recommend is to respect the boundaries a wife may explicitly state and imply. Don't rub it in her face.

    I wish all wives would be on this site and read about the total fear their husbands' go through because of their kinks.

  14. #14
    There's that smile! CarlaWestin's Avatar
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    I've had every close call that can be imagined. Even the times when I've planned all week on an adventure. I've had four hour time blocks where I knew there wouldn't be any chance of an issue. And then get a call like, "Look and see if I've left my glasses on the table." And I'm 5 miles away in a store dressed like a tart. Or, I get right up to the point and just get a strange premonition and decide not to do it. Only to have something go down that would have definitely outed me.

    But one of my favorite was when I was in a store and took a picture of something and emailed it to her. I kept nagging, "Did you look yet?" Checking my sent email a couple of days later I noticed that the message was sent to my wife from Carla Westin. The next thing I know she's holding her phone saying, "So what is this thing you're dying for me to see?" Cool as a frozen cucumber I say, "Here Sweetheart. Let me find it for you." And reach out for her phone. Scroll, find, delete, Trash Folder, find, permanently delete, fake more puzzled look scrolling. Hand phone back saying, "I don't know. I must have screwed it up."

    The heightened sense of situational awareness that is endemic with this proclivity never ceases to amaze me.
    I've waited so long for this time. Makeup is so frustrating. Shaking hands and I look so old. This was a mistake.
    My new maid's outfit is cute. Sure fits tight.
    And then I step into the bedroom and in the mirror, I see a beautiful woman looking back at me.
    Smile, Honey! You look fabulous!

  15. #15
    Silver Member Natalie5004's Avatar
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    Carla, Your brain is much faster than mine.

    My wife has on occasion fooled with my phone. I don't care for the most part but this time I must have left a photo of Natalie in the picture folder.
    She did not tell me about it for weeks. We are in a DADT relationship. She knows I dress and even comments I have better makeup that her. "Who's fault is that is my normal reply". They sell this stuff to anyone.
    She has seen my false eyelashes and dangle earrings I wear in my pierced ears.

    We agree that if I do not push to present to her as Natalie all will be fine. I have asked on multiple occasions. We now agree I will never ask again.

    But, she knows that I work from home alone all day. I have new clothes and shoes. I wear them at least 2x a week while she is working. I always ask for her schedule so I can get "dinner ready". And it is, but Natalie makes it for us.

  16. #16
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    O yeah I had a whew moment with face time I was out of town for work I had just left my hotel one early summer evening completely dressed for a little shopping I called my wife while driving and had dialed her on FaceTime fortunately I caught it after a couple rings and stopped the call I can?t imagine what her reaction would have been. All the ladies that comment on ?its not if she finds out but when? your making me nervous.

  17. #17
    Reality Check
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    If you are a crossdresser and dressing in the same home with another person or people (wife, children, parents, room mate), the question is not "if" you get caught, but "when" you get caught. You will get caught.

    You can't count on your wife (or anybody) coming home at a certain time. They might have gotten sick, the workplace might have closed early because of a power failure, or any of a dozen or more other reasons. Ordering things delivered to your house is another problem. And there are always unannounced visitors. Your wife's sister was in the neighborhood and wanted to drop something off for her, etc.

    You don't have to "do" facetime. That's your choice.

    Your options are pretty much tell your wife about your little hobby, give it up or rent a storage unit and keep your stuff there and do your dressing there. That still leaves the risk of her finding out about the storage unit by seeing the credit card bill.

    My choice was to tell her about my crossdressing. I'm sure she doesn't like the fact that her "man" wears a dress, boobs and a wig, but she has accepted it.
    Krisi

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