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Thread: The other Two Things post

  1. #1
    There's that smile! CarlaWestin's Avatar
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    The other Two Things post

    This crossdressing thing is actually two things.

    1) Like many here, I crossdress for the fun, excitement, artful creativity, cerebral stimulus, etc.. It's just what I enjoy and I'm perfectly comfortable and balanced as a male entity.

    2) Many others here crossdress to be or be closer to being female. The comfort goes away when having to emulate male or the birth genetics entity.

    So, where are you?
    I've waited so long for this time. Makeup is so frustrating. Shaking hands and I look so old. This was a mistake.
    My new maid's outfit is cute. Sure fits tight.
    And then I step into the bedroom and in the mirror, I see a beautiful woman looking back at me.
    Smile, Honey! You look fabulous!

  2. #2
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    Carla,
    I can only descibe going back to male mode as total discomfort , which for me now feels like crossdressing .

    It really does feel good to accept being TG and living as a woman . I also admit it is more fun , it's stimulating and makes me feel far more creative . Turning seventy in April as a man is a depressing thought .

  3. #3
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    I guess I'm looking for where those two worlds intersect. What needs to happen in order for me to feel authentic and genuine about who I really am. What do I need to present to the world in order to be me.

    Not sure where this might end up on the male/female spectrum. Is it mostly MIAD. Is it living female 24/7. Don't think it's full transition. This is all part of the journey I'm on.
    Why fit in when you were born to stand out? - Dr. Suess

  4. #4
    Senior Member Tracy Irving's Avatar
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    I feel no discomfort while living in male mode.

  5. #5
    Silver Member Pumped's Avatar
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    I have never been 100% comfortable as a male, even back to my childhood I didn't fit in. That said I am not 100% comfortable crossdresssing either. I don't see myself ever coming out and dressing fully, although I probably will continue with doing a more endogenous thing, wearing women's clothing, jeans, boots in a male mode.

    I do enjoy wearing dresses and jewelry and trying to look the best I can, I do get some comfort dressing, I just don't see ever taking it to the street.

  6. #6
    Member JennyMay's Avatar
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    I really struggle with this. I know I am male. I wish I were female. I?m not comfortable with being male but I guess I am resigned to it.

  7. #7
    Member Alexis00's Avatar
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    Been watching lots of the videos by Dr. Z on YouTube about transgender issues. A GG friend is watching them also to understand TG issues so we can chat more. She realized she had a lot of stereotypical views.

    I’m fine with male presentation, because lazy....
    Last edited by Alexis00; 01-11-2021 at 05:00 AM.

  8. #8
    Female Illusionist! docrobbysherry's Avatar
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    U left out the sexual component, Carla!

    It doesn't happen every time I dress. But, sometimes seeing myself in the mirror just plain turns me on!
    U can't keep doing the same things over and over and expect to enjoy life to the max. When u try new things, even if they r out of your comfort zone, u may experience new excitement and growth that u never expected.

    Challenge yourself and pursue your passions! When your life clock runs out, you'll have few or NO REGRETS!

  9. #9
    Aspiring Member April Rose's Avatar
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    Both, I think, for me, but more 2 than 1
    I am a vessel of the goddess. Let me express my calling to a feminine life through nurturing love and relatedness.

  10. #10
    New Member Maggie3210's Avatar
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    I dress mainly for fun and because I like the feel and look of women's clothes, especially shoes, pantyhose and leggings. I am physically more comfortable in women's clothing when at home, but stay in male mode outside the house, except for under clothes.

  11. #11
    Senior Member Sandi Beech's Avatar
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    Carla,
    Over time I have leaned one way or the other to some degree, but having gone out many times in recent years it boils down to this. I almost become another person when I go out. I turn into a much more outgoing person and the experiences related to being this different person sort of became addictive. It is hard for me to comprehend why that is. I do not think I would want to do it all the time though, so I guess that firmly plants me in the crossdresser check box. I think partly I missed out on a lot of fun activities like dancing etc when I was young due to being so shy. Funny how my Sandi personally is WAY different. So the short answer, I do it for the fun and excitement but for me , fun means I have to interact with others. Dressing up just for myself does little for me.

    Sandi

  12. #12
    Aspiring Member Star01's Avatar
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    I started therapy not long after the first of the year in an attempt to better understand myself and answer these questions. Probably partially due to the circumstances we're all finding ourselves in and being locked down in DADT unable to even take deliveries has slowed that process. The answers ultimately have to come from me and I spent twenty five years in an organization that shunned crossdressing as a perversion so I have a lot of that to unpack first. I started going to therapy in an attempt to answer those questions but have to unpack all the cult baggage and guilt first before I can understand my crossdressing and gender issues. It's a process that can take years and each person is different.

  13. #13
    Member Brandi Christine's Avatar
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    Since starting back into crossdressing a few years ago, even with the help of a therapist & my wife, I can honestly say I really don't know... I am comfortable being male, but part of me want's what's on the other side. But like JennyMay said above, I am resigned to it.
    ...Damsel in distress.
    Not exactly natural, Stunning none the less...

    (As Girls Go by Suzanne Vega)

  14. #14
    Silver Member Maria 60's Avatar
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    I'm going with #1, I love being a male but do enjoy this strong femine side. Sometimes it just feels so nice to escape your male self and just dress and relax. I do definitely love the feel of women's cloth, I underdress everyday.

  15. #15
    Member Julie Slowinski's Avatar
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    It?s a bit of both. I like being a guy, shlepping around without a care for what I look like. It?s the mode for taking care of the ordinary parts of life. But, then Julie is tons of fun, outgoing with all kinds of energy to do interesting things and talk to anyone who will listen. As you can imagine she is quite exhausting, and it?s good to have time to recover.
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  16. #16
    Aspiring Member GracieRose's Avatar
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    I was never, and still am not comfortable as a male.
    When I'm dressed as a woman, it just feels right.

  17. #17
    Senior Member Geena75's Avatar
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    I definitely fall under the #1 description. I get some pleasure or satisfaction out of dressing up. Come the day I go out of the house, it will still be for the same reasons. I don't doubt I would act like a different person, since I would be dressed up (dare I say disguised?) as a different person. They say "clothes makes the 'person.'"

  18. #18
    Aspiring Member SaraLin's Avatar
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    You can put me down as #2.

    "male" has never been a comfortable fit for me - but I've learned to deal with it.

  19. #19
    Gold Member Crissy 107's Avatar
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    Interesting thread, I am in the #1 group but I can see how some of us naturally progress from thinking 1 and then going to 2.
    If someone asked me years ago I would have said I was a 2
    Crissy

  20. #20
    Reality Check Krisi's Avatar
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    I am comfortable as a male and never thought I was anything else. However, there are times when I wish I could experience being female. Obviously, except in the movies, this cannot and will not happen. I suppose the next best thing is dressing as a female, including the breasts, hips and hair.

    Going out in public as a female enhances this experience although I am always conscious of the fact that I am not actually female.
    Krisi

  21. #21
    There's that smile! CarlaWestin's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Sandi Beech View Post
    .......I almost become another person when I go out...........I do not think I would want to do it all the time though, so I guess that firmly plants me in the crossdresser check box......
    Yeah, this is also one of my most fabulous experiences. I'm sociable (although not driven to be social) so I always enjoy conversations with absolute strangers when Carla gets out. All the time would have to include everything.
    Like going to the dentist. Or other things that just flow easier in original genetic format.

    Quote Originally Posted by docrobbysherry View Post
    U left out the sexual component, Carla!

    It doesn't happen every time I dress. But, sometimes seeing myself in the mirror just plain turns me on!
    Thank's for adding that in, Sherry. I know exactly what you mean.

    6266p.JPG6268p.JPG
    I've waited so long for this time. Makeup is so frustrating. Shaking hands and I look so old. This was a mistake.
    My new maid's outfit is cute. Sure fits tight.
    And then I step into the bedroom and in the mirror, I see a beautiful woman looking back at me.
    Smile, Honey! You look fabulous!

  22. #22
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    Definitely more 2 than 1.

  23. #23
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    Honestly, it?s a bit of both for me.
    Male presentation is what I?ve always done, so I?m generally quite comfortable there. When I have had a recent opportunity to dress, even more so. However, once a month or so has passed, the wish becomes want, want becomes need, then need becomes an undeniable force that infiltrates everything I do. I feel resentful of every scrap of male-intended clothing, every healthy hair follicle lower than my eyes becomes an affront, and the fact that not a single ounce of extra weight that hasn?t opted to provide me with some kind of curve in the back is just exasperating. Then I get a chance to scratch the itch, (yes Doc, that one too) and the whole process reboots.

  24. #24
    Exploring NEPA now Cheryl T's Avatar
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    #2 fits me best.
    I was never fully at ease being male, always felt a bit "off" and never comfortable doing all those boy things.
    I always felt I was acting, trying to be what I thought people expected. I have always been more sure of myself as a woman.
    I don't wear women's clothes, I wear MY clothes !

  25. #25
    Loving my femme side tifftg's Avatar
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    I love when I can immerse myself in Tiffany time. I think about it often and in these lock down days in a DADT situation with my wife I don't get to dress enough. That being said, I am quite comfortable in my male self which is nearly all the time right now.

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