Today I looked at some photos of myself in lingerie and, for the first time, actually felt aroused by the images. I've been turned on while dressing, combined with fantasy and images of others, but never of myself. Have you?
Julie
Today I looked at some photos of myself in lingerie and, for the first time, actually felt aroused by the images. I've been turned on while dressing, combined with fantasy and images of others, but never of myself. Have you?
Julie
Inside my heart is breaking
My make-up may be flaking
But my smile still stays on
That's quite common. Some people refer to this as Autogynephilia.
I don't get "turned on" by my own image so much as "feel sexy" or confident.
But I do often domme myself in the mirror in a non-sexual way, and trance myself. If your personality is s bit fractured (like mine lol) you can get an actual power exchange this way and it's a fun way of imposing self discipline and regulating yourself.
Apologies had to Goggle
Autogynephilia (derived from Greek for 'love of oneself as a woman') is the term Blanchard coined for "a male's propensity to be sexually aroused by the thought of himself as a female", intending for the term to refer to "the full gamut of erotically arousing cross-gender behaviors and fantasies"
Enjoy Julie, life is short hun...
Escapism isn't necessarily bad, but is definitely unhealthy in the long term. While helpful in the short term, things will degrade over time. At some point, the escapee will have to face the issue. Things simply blowing over isn't really going to happen in many situations.
I am very similar to Wen4cd in that I dont get turned on by myself - nowhere near pretty enough for that. I do, however, feel extremely sexy and gorgeous when dressed. The feeling inside me when I put on bra, panties, skirt or a dress. I just feel warm and extremely happy. At this stage, I only really look in the mirror to confirm that I really do have a big grin on my face. Maybe that will change when I start doing make up, nails etc but for right now, it is all about the feeling and pleasure dressing gives me.
Love Rach
Julie, I have experienced that feeling too. Its not like back when I was 13 (and even the wind blowing could be erotic ,,, LOL) but yeah, when I look a pictures of myself dressed and you see a very sexy woman it can give me a little rush.
Mmmmm i think if anyone said that never happen to them they would be lying to themselves!
This past year I haven?t been able to dress fully but when I do I still get as much of a thrill as a 69 year old can muster. Nothing comes of it but the thought still comes up it makes my stomach flutter a bit.
In spite of no outlet I still am a sexual creature and in my case having been a cult member for 25 years one goal of my therapy is to cut through the religious guilt. I wouldn?t be as attracted to dressing if I didn?t feel that bit of a rush. If that makes me an autowhatever so be it, I will own it because that is me. Actually we have spent a lot of time peeling these kinds of layers off in an attempt to figure me out. Nothing has been off limits and I welcome the findings. Sexuality is nothing to be ashamed of.
Indirectly if this counts: I have taken the scenic route to the chills and the quickened pulse in the form of another person telling me that a pic of me turned them on. ( The gentle way it was written contributed. Other more straight-to-the-point expressions of affection have had me appreciative of the sentiment but dampened by the delivery ). And then together with the thought that that pic did that to them, it then became a turn-on to me.
If, in that emotionally-charged state, I would have seen myself walking along the street, would I have propositioned me? No.
If the other person were walking along the street, would I have propositioned them? Unlikely, but it would have been closer. ( Hesitant because I wouldn't be sure whether I'm just high on validation or whether I'm truly interested. Probably the former ).
- L.
It is pretty common to be aroused by photos of yourself as a woman. And there is nothing wrong with that. It may be a type of dissociative behavior. Over time that response normally fades away as you begin to see that image as not sexually attractive but more of a real woman. So it may be that your brain is reminded of the feelings you had when you really looked like that and is replaying those memories in the context of the present. Most of your memories are tied to what can be likened to the "stories" the brain builds to remember events and restring them into a sensible series that resembles the original event. It could also be a matter of your brain constructing a meaningful story derived from looking at the photograph so it can store the memory of the current moment and its associated feelings. The next time you view the photo your brain will play back that stored story and you will have similar feelings that may or may not be re-stored with modifications and possible enhancements that were not there when the photo was first viewed.
We like to think our brain only sees the plain and naked facts. Not so. Most facts are stored with an association to something that provides a context. That is how assumed facts can start to appear as the truth when replayed and thereby become convincingly more "factual" to the point of being illusions or delusions. Viewing things objectively requires training your brain to not associate something factual with a story that puts the fact in an emotional context. It is easy to mix them up pure objectivity is next to impossible for our brains to achieve. It just doesn't work that way.
Autogynephilia is a real thing but it is probably a matter of associating a physical look with an emotional response that was printed into your memory. The thought was that that association will always occur when your brain sees your image in a context that is similar to the original event. Thus the idea that autogynephilic people of one sex desires to have sex when that self is seen as presenting as the opposite sex is promoted into an illusion of reality. Unfortunately, the theory collapsed when it was found out the brain doesn't actually work precisely that way and the autogynephilic response is contrived and out of the context of the present. The theory has enough truth to it to think things are actually working that way when, in fact, they are not. Increasing the magnification of the microscope can show that somethings you thought were there really aren't and just look that way at low magnification. It becomes an illusion or delusion that you habitually turn to. Breaking the habit puts the train back on the tracks and, in time, the sexual response to the image of yourself as being seen as somewhat female and therefore sexually attractive your male self fades away and only rarely pops into the conscious mind to produce a bit of arousal. Instead of arousal, your thought is, "Dang, I make a pretty good looking chick." You see you as having a personality and identity and not just a sexuality.
Thinking about this thread in the bigger picture I am wondering what the point is. So, if we say yes, my dressing has a sexual component, what does that imply? Are we to consider ourselves to not be legitimate crossdressers or simply on a different branch of the transgender tree?
I?m wondering what it means if we say yes.
How about 'soft focus?' When I get all dressed up (mask and all, sigh) I go to the big mirror in the bathroom looking down, then close my eyes, pose, and open them. I often get a 'wow' reaction and my eyes do the soft focus common when you look at that special someone. I don't know if that counts as 'turned on.' The touch of the clothes gets me more.
Yes, my pleasure principle turns on every time I dress and I dress daily. The pink fog is always with me to some degree. I don?t experience fantasy or images of others.
Nope, never happened to me. I might feel sexy, and I can appreciate that I look good, but I’ve never been aroused by myself.
Hi Julie, While I have several pictures of myself, I don't have any lingerie pictures, I do have effeminate pictures I occasionally enjoy looking at. After getting all dolled up I have paused at the mirror for way too long almost, longing for that woman. Thanks for the post, I will enjoy watching the responses. Take care, Brenda
It's been a long time....very long time...but, probably yes. Now? At 73? Not so much. Perhaps, it is looking at a mature woman as desirable. There was a time when the visual of a woman letting it all "just hang out" as if she was looking to get in bed was a definite turn on. Now, it is a woman with a good deal of mystery. That's how I view myself when attired in pretty dress and heels.
. . . You know how you can consider somebody attractive but not be attracted to them? Well, similarly here, ( if it's purely about attraction-to-self without a force-multiplier like third-party admiration, specifically selected attire, realisation of ambition, etc ), there would also need to be an aligning.
Fundamentally, you would need a great transformation first. That ain't easy . And then that transformation would also need to align with what you find a turn-on. That's just a crap shoot.
So it's clear to see why many people's answer would be "no".
So if your answer is "yes" what does it imply? Well, at the very least, it implies you have a great transformation.
- L.
Julie,
My image doesn't tun me on but I accept I look more attractive as a female than in male mode , that is more a connection with wearing women's clothes , they look more attractive , pretty and possibly sexy .
Monica,
Autogynephilia is a more complex subject than " Just loving yourself as a woman " . I admit I do have AGP but it's more than just sexual , the need to be seen and accepted as a woman . I dug deeper into the subject away from the forum and discovered work after Blanchard . He did get aspects of it wrong as it's also associated with TG people and not just TSs as he suggested .
It's a label I accept and live with , it's no big deal and doesn't really affect my life now .
I do feel it touches on a female side within us , we choose certain clothes possibly like a woman would to make herself pretty , attractive , glamourous or sexy . So that raises the question what drives the need in a woman , who does she do it for herself or the close people around her ? Why should we be any different and where is the harm in feeling that way ?
Last edited by Teresa; 01-25-2021 at 11:31 AM.
i think there can be quite a bit of fetishism associated with crossdressing. I think people can deny it, but they can be lying to themselves. Why do you think so many people underdress?
A couple months ago while searching to try and understand myself better I ran across the subject of Autogynephilia and brought it up in one of our sessions. My therapist dismissed it as not relevant in the sense that human sexuality is so intertwined with everything else about us. I am working through religious quilt from twenty five years of cult indoctrination so he instead focused on that. I get the impression that the focus with me is the guilt and accepting myself (dare I say the word) as transgender. In other words, this is what I am and where I'm at in my life, now what. The sexual side is obviously a factor from the first time the soldier stood at attention until today he's a shriveled up old veteran but still remembers how to snap to attention.
Darla,
Underdressing satisfies many needs , some could be sexual but to others it's the best compromise to not being free to be out .
If I had a problem with a sexual side being dressed and turned on I couldn't comfortably go out as Teresa , people are only comfortable and accept me because they see me as a woman , otherwise I might be rejected as a pervert .
Star,
Many reject AGP because of Ray Blanchard getting some facts wrong , he upset many people but I have contacted professionals in this field away from the forum and it is a very complex subject . I know the way my dressing started was very much to do with AGP , we have to accept we are all different , some labels just don't fit with some people but it doesn't mean the labels are valueless .
Last edited by Teresa; 01-25-2021 at 11:42 AM.
I started out being aroused by my image in the mirror and in photos 23 years ago and at age 77 still do! Looking at photos like my avatar, how could I not?
Teresa, I don't wish to nitpick but I believe Blanchard's AGP involved sex and arousal, not "love" for one's fem self. Aitho I enjoy going out dressed with, and meeting up with, other dressers?
That is a COMPLETELY DIFFEREN'T feeling from AGP. Sex never enters my mind when I'm out dressed. With or without others around!
Last edited by docrobbysherry; 01-26-2021 at 02:00 AM.
U can't keep doing the same things over and over and expect to enjoy life to the max. When u try new things, even if they r out of your comfort zone, u may experience new excitement and growth that u never expected.
Challenge yourself and pursue your passions! When your life clock runs out, you'll have few or NO REGRETS!
There was a time, during one of my "Why, oh why do I do this" moments, that I latched onto the idea that I was turned on by my image dressed. But, that idea was untenable since I'm not that attractive dressed as a female. So, what is it about CDing that is a turn on for me? My conclusion, for now, is that I'm turned on by the state of emasculation. The idea of being a man and especially the idea of performing sexually as a man was always attractive to me in theory but in actuality it filled me with dread. So I began to fantasize about being on the other side of the equation. Not being a "man" for a bit of time is what allowed me to experience sexual arousal without angst.
re: autogynephilia. There are two aspects of AGP that get mixed up. There is AGP the phenomenon and AGP the theory. The phenomenon is "a male's tendency to be sexually aroused by the idea or image of himself as a woman." Then there is the theory which is meant to explain the phenomenon. The theory has multiple parts. One is that there are two types of Transsexuals: The exclusively androphilic type and the AGP type. I'm not trans so this doesn't apply to me. Maybe it doesn't apply to anybody. I don't know and I don't care. Another part of the theory that supposedly applies to AGPs is the idea of erotic target location error (ETLE). Basically, this says that the AGP is attracted to himself as a woman and becomes his own girlfriend. That's kind of what this thread is about. I don't think this applies to me either as I explained above but it might be a related concept. But when I think of AGP as applied to myself, I'm only thinking of the phenomenon and not the theory.
Last edited by LilSissyStevie; 01-25-2021 at 01:19 PM.
I do have a gleam of satisfaction when I see a photo of myself in an attractive setting.
It means I have got it all together for once. :-)
Work on your elegance,
and beauty will follow.