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Thread: A feminine mindset

  1. #1
    New Member emmarinn's Avatar
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    Red face A feminine mindset

    Last week I was window shopping on Amazon and I came across a recommendation of a hormonal balance support supplement. I've never tried something like this before and I don't think I want to without seeing a doctor first, but I'd be lying if I said I wasn't curious about it so I clicked on it and started reading reviews. Most of the reviews were from girls who seemed happy with the results they were getting from taking these pills.

    Something that caught my attention was that a lot of girls said they were getting into a more feminine mind or experimenting more feminine emotions and sex drive. This resonated with me because some of the thoughts/feelings I experiment when I dress can easily be part of a "feminine mindset" but I guess I never cared to give it a name.

    I kept thinking about it and I found myself wondering what did these girls mean when they said they were feeling more feminine. I know words can mean different things to different people, so I'm asking my fellow CD girls and GG girls in this forum, if you feel you have one, what does it mean to you to have a feminine mind? What makes you feel feminine?

    For me, one of the big things I experience is self love. I'm a lot more nurturing and compassionate with myself about the things I say, think, do, etc. I say this because for me, self love is something that is very hard to access or something I totally forget about when I'm in boy mode.

    TL;DR what do you think a feminine mindset is?

    Sorry for the long intro, I felt I needed to provide context so the question didn't feel vague or generic.

    xx, Emma

  2. #2
    Member susanmichelle's Avatar
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    Emma, curiously is all well and good but I would never recommend taking anything to do with hormones especially off the internet. My suggestion if your really interested in doing that go see a gender specific doctor to first off will know from talking to you just how far you might want to go and if you fit into that lifestyle. That doesn?t mean your going to have surgery or anything like that. Many just want to use hrt after the doctor thinks it would be right for you and then either prescribe what would be correct to you and the correct doses for you as well, or send you to another doctor who would prescribe your medication from there. I?ve heard that some of the so called reviews are made up to help sell you something like estrogen or other drugs that might not even be legitimate. Just my 2 cents.

  3. #3
    Senior Member DianeT's Avatar
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    I think a feminine mindset from a crossdresser point of view is based on how we conceptualize women. It doesn't necessarily have much to do with how women actually feel and think. It's more a femininity as seen through a male distorsion lens, based on what we know from women (which includes a lot of stereotypes) and bits of what we love or dislike about them thrown in the mix.

  4. #4
    Super Moderator char GG's Avatar
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    Mod warning:

    Before this thread goes too far, just remember these rules:

    The discussion of ANY herbal medication and any kind of supplements for ANY reason is prohibited
    The discussion of ANY over the counter medication for ANY reason is prohibited
    Feel free to discuss what you feel the feminine mindset is but do not discuss the prohibited topics.

  5. #5
    Super Moderator char GG's Avatar
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    Please remember the source. You were on a site that is there to sell things. My thought is that the reviews were possibly fake. Most GG's that I know already have a "feminine mindset".

  6. #6
    Rural T Girl Teri Ray's Avatar
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    Why would any male have a desire to wear female attire if they didn't have some form of "feminine mindset?" I figure you either have it or you don't.
    Teri Ray Rural Idaho Girl.

  7. #7
    Aspiring Member Star01's Avatar
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    I have a switchable mindset. When I am out digging in the yard it switches to the work and hand. I have seen women laying in the dirt on a 95 degree day changing gears in the quick change rear end of a race car and non crossdressing men do things that are traditionally considered feminine.

    The idea that women must be a certain way because they are women and that is their role seems kind of dated. I raised my daughters to think they are capable of doing anything. If they want to fly fighter jets or drive non-wing sprint cars that is fine. It seems to me that we are sometimes guilty of being set in a traditional gender role mindset and this is the last place I would expect to see that. Women and crossdressers by extension are not obligated to adhere to 1950s era gender stereotypes.

  8. #8
    Female Illusionist! docrobbysherry's Avatar
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    Unhappy Remember, dressers don't think like females!

    I've met 100's of dressers in person. Including a couple who I liked that fully transitioned! But, even tho they looked like women and had female bits? I wasn't aroused because their personalities didn't seem female!

    In fact, over the last 12+ years of meeting T's from all over, I can only think of 2 that had a female mind set! They seemed to think and act like women! They were the only ones that made me feel like I was with a woman.

    The idea that u can take anything that will make u think like a female may be just another CD fantasy!
    U can't keep doing the same things over and over and expect to enjoy life to the max. When u try new things, even if they r out of your comfort zone, u may experience new excitement and growth that u never expected.

    Challenge yourself and pursue your passions! When your life clock runs out, you'll have few or NO REGRETS!

  9. #9
    Senior Member DianeT's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Teri Ray View Post
    Why would any male have a desire to wear female attire if they didn't have some form of "feminine mindset?"
    Teri my initial reason for dressing was a fascination for the female body, and it didn't really change over the years. When I dress, my mindset is very much masculine, and although I want to experience the crossover, I don't actually feel "feminine" (as in sharing some inner woman experience) for a second. I suppose that I am not the only one on this board feeling this way.
    Last edited by DianeT; 02-14-2021 at 01:20 PM.

  10. #10
    Silver Member LilSissyStevie's Avatar
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    What DianeT said. It's just a bunch of stereotypes just like masculine stereotypes. Have fun with them but don't take them too seriously.

  11. #11
    Silver Member Aunt Kelly's Avatar
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    First of all, there are very good reasons for the rule against discussion of herbal concoctions here - they are potentially dangerous, not to mention the fact that they just don't work.

    As for the whole "mindset" question... While it is true that HRT (following a protocol that is recognized as safe and effective) can produce changes to the brain that are more common in AFAB subjects, little to no research has been done to document the effects of those changes. There is no evidence to support the myth commonly promulgated on this platform that HRT medications have their own psychotropic effect. At the same time, there is ample evidence the mere act of taking on HRT has an effect on one's psyche. After a few months, I can tell you that it is the physical manifestations of that therapy, as subtle as they are at this stage, which make me "feel more like a girl", but that's the whole point - aligning the body with what's already there in the psyche.

    I think Doc Sherry's observation is most astute. We are the product of our upbringing and socialization. We are programmed, if you will, to respond to various situations in gender specific ways. Neither medication nor manner of dress is going to magically undo that programming.
    Calling bigotry an "opinion" is like calling arsenic a "flavor".

  12. #12
    New Member emmarinn's Avatar
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    Hey all, first of all thank you for sharing Also, I want to clarify that I wasn't planning on taking any pills, supplements or any other stuff and that I wasn't trying to find out if what the people in the reviews said was true or not. I know pills can't change the way we were raised and the things we learned while growing up.

    I brought up the reviews because they prompted me to think about what other CDs like me and GGs consider "feminine" traits in their personalities, whether they believe these traits are stereotypes or not. I hear this word often, sometimes used by women to describe themselves and/or other women.

    IMO, femininity can be anything a woman can do or be. That said, DianeT summed it up pretty good for me when it comes to a CDs point of view. I'll never truly feel or think like a woman because I didn't grow up like one and I'm not on the path to physically become one.

    I guess I just wanted to talk to real people and hear what they had to say about what they perceived as feminine in their lives nowadays instead of reading some random article or list on google. But now that I think about it, I can see how this discussion can get out of hand if we all start listing personality traits. 🤔

  13. #13
    Senior Member Maid_Marion's Avatar
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    I find it much easier to socialize when presenting as a women. It is awkward when I present as a guy even though I'm AMAB.
    The difficulty with learning social interactions is that they happen so quickly. I notice what I've done after I've done them.
    I'm not on HRT as I have no need to do so.

    Marion

  14. #14
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    A male might be considered ultra masculine. So, what is a masculine mindset ?
    Conversely, a female can be considered ultra feminine.
    Neither one has little to do with someone's unique physical appearance.

    However, we all know how masculinity and femininity differ.

    So if someone feels feminine, it should be self explanatory and no profound explanation is needed.
    The only question would be is just how feminine they feel as degrees of femininity can vary, just as there are degrees of masculinity.

    Through the years, I have had females tell me such thins like, their ample breast, or wearing a skirt/ dress etc, make them fell more feminine. Does that Sound familiar?

    Consider that Dolly Parton has said a few times that if she was not born a female she would be a drag queen because she loves all things feminine and feeling feminine so much.
    I believe that most (males and females) know exactly what she means.

    BTW... 1in 1984 Susan Brownmiller wrote a book called "Femininity". One chapter was devoted to female clothes. She maintained restrictive female clothes and shoes make many females feel more feminine. Again, does that sound familiar?

    Finally , let's not confuse "femininity" with "Feminism" as they are two totally different things .
    Last edited by Barbara Jo; 02-14-2021 at 06:00 PM.

  15. #15
    Member Miel GG's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by emmarinn View Post
    I'll never truly feel or think like a woman because I didn't grow up like one and I'm not on the path to physically become one.
    True ! And you cannot find any magic potion online to do so

    If you want a GG's point of view on femininity, please have a look on our answers here :Ask-a-GG-Three see #3 to #8 and #15
    Last edited by Miel GG; 02-14-2021 at 05:52 PM.

  16. #16
    Silver Member Micki_Finn's Avatar
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    So, the problem with discussing a “feminine mindset” is that you are necessarily defining what sort of “thoughts” are right or wrong for women. Women are not a monolith and they all think differently. In fact, most of our ideas about feminine vs masculine are based on arbitrary societal values and not biology.

    [SIZE=1]- - - Updated - - -[/SIZE]

    Quote Originally Posted by emmarinn View Post
    IMO, femininity can be anything a woman can do or be.
    This is sticky. What sorts of things can women be or do that?s different from men?

  17. #17
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    Give Birth !
    Joanne

  18. #18
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    Like I said.....

    Finally , let's not confuse "femininity" with "Feminism" as they are two totally different things .
    IMO some of the replies seem to be addressing the latter.

  19. #19
    Silver Member Micki_Finn's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by JoanneNY View Post
    Give Birth !
    But not every woman can give birth. Would that make her not a woman or not feminine? See how sticky it gets when you try to say “women are this”?

    [SIZE=1]- - - Updated - - -[/SIZE]

    And Barbra Jo, there’s no way to address one without the other unless you just choose to accept the old Patriarchal definition that was imposed on women. Feminism is women’s voice on femininity and it cannot just be discounted out of hand in a discussion like this.

  20. #20
    Platinum Member Beverley Sims's Avatar
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    I was given a hormone regimen when I was twenty, yes it does play with the mind.

    Beware!
    Work on your elegance,
    and beauty will follow.

  21. #21
    Miss Conception Karren H's Avatar
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    Since I am not a woman I really do not know what a feminine mindset is... pretty sure I don?t have one... the clothes and makeup make me feel more feminine but I still think like a guy. Doing stupid guy things. Which my wife reminds me of that all the time.

  22. #22
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    Feminism is women?s voice on femininity
    That is not the definition of feminism

    Feminism is the advocacy of women's rights on the basis of the equality of the sexes.(in society) and it has nothing to do with femininity/being feminine.

  23. #23
    Member Miel GG's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Barbara Jo View Post
    That is not the definition of feminism

    Feminism is the advocacy of women's rights on the basis of the equality of the sexes.(in society) and it has nothing to do with femininity/being feminine.
    The definition of femininity is the product of our way of thinking of the female sex and gender which are of course under the influence of patriarchy in western societies. Being feminist is also call into question the 'traditional'/ordinary definition of femininity.

  24. #24
    Senior Member DianeT's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Barbara Jo View Post
    However, we all know how masculinity and femininity differ.
    Barbara Jo, this would imply that we all share a common core definition of what masculinity and femininity is, and yet, when you actually ask that question to a group, everyone answers it in different ways. We should probably let go these femininity and masculinity concepts, because they are chimeras, nobody understands the same thing when they hear it and to be honest I think few people ask themselves what they mean exactly, given the difficulty they have to explain it when asked.

    If we leave the "feminine" out of the OP's question, the question becomes: Do you experience personality alterations when presenting as female?
    Brain plasticity is good but probably not good enough to allow clothes to reconfigure your wiring in a split second, so essentially, if you answer "yes" to the question and you never feel feminine in other circumstances, it simply means you roleplay when dressing.

    [SIZE=1]- - - Updated - - -[/SIZE]

    Quote Originally Posted by docrobbysherry View Post
    I've met 100's of dressers in person. Including a couple who I liked that fully transitioned! But, even tho they looked like women and had female bits? I wasn't aroused because their personalities didn't seem female!
    Doc, let's be honest. You had an unfair advantage: you knew they were not women at birth. It's like a wine blind test where you would keep the labels on the bottles. If you had done a Turing test with the same persons, I bet you would have been fooled quite a few times.

    Let me tell you a story: back in 2006 I used to play the World of Warcraft online multiplayer game. I started with a human male priest but didn't like watching this pile of muscles with a moustache in front of me for hours on end. I saw a few mages throwing cool fireballs and started a female one. I chose a human too, which gave me a blonde cutie with long hair (a mistake I did not make again). At least that character was nicer to look at when playing, and although not a member of a guild at that time, was frequently invited and re-invited in groups and made new friends fast. Since almost no one was using in-game voice communications at the time, nobody knew the gender of the person behind the keyboard. I do jokes on these forums, and did then when playing. That is my personality (or mindset if you allow me this little semantic shift). I was just being me, but in the shape of a female avatar. I wasn't trying to fool anyone, and took care of not stereotyping my character by acting cute or otherwise "gendering" my character. Essentially, I was playing and having fun with other players like I would in any other circumstances. But nobody could see me in flesh.

    I wouldn't go as far as pretending this was a legitimate Turing test, but you get the idea.

    And here is what happened: I was hit on frequently by all kinds of players, sometimes young, sometimes more mature, and even harassed by an obnoxious nitwit (nice glimpse of what female players can endure). And endlessly asked what my gender was (worth noting, this never happened once when playing my male characters!). Obviously, quite a few people thought I could be a female player (not counting those who did not even mention it). Am I good enough to change my personality in an instant to a point where I easily fool people? Of course not. The explanation as I see it is very simple: while many of us think we could tell a woman from a man any time personality-wise, we actually can't. The feminine and masculine personalities are simply indistinguishable. My perceived "femininity" was solely in the eye of the beholder. I looked like a woman (a bit pixelated, mind you), which biased players into thinking I probably was one (because, like a player once replied after I told him I wasn't, it's "so weird to play a female character when you are a guy". Sure, and you should go tell all male players of the Tomb Raider license that they need to get their act together).

    You may not agree with the "indistinguishable" statement above. If you don't, can I suggest that you ask yourself this question (for members mainly identifying as male): biologic-related topics aside, is there any personality trait that you have that a woman couldn't have? Any thought that crosses your mind that couldn't cross a a female brain?
    Last edited by DianeT; 02-15-2021 at 03:54 AM.

  25. #25
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    Come on people..... we all know who is masculine and who is feminine in our culture .

    For the last and final time ....." feminism." is simply a range of movements that calls for equality of the sexes under the law so females can not be discriminated ageist in favor of males .
    https://www.google.com/search?client...1-d&q=feminism.
    Last edited by Barbara Jo; 02-15-2021 at 08:33 AM.

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